Gwaihir:


I likened the scenario to a Fwb, wasn't talking about a fwb per say.

So basically your consideration is per as at now not the possibility of future outcomes.

Whatever scenario it is, if it isn't a serious/committed relationship it isn't cheating

I really don't know, life is a gamble, depends on the situation

ibkayee:

Whatever scenario it is, if it isn't a serious/committed relationship it isn't cheating

I really don't know, life is a gamble, depends on the situation

Okay....understood.

Ibkayee

Can i ask you further questions on this topic?

Gwaihir:
Ibkayee

Can i ask you further questions on this topic?

Yeah sure

ibkayee:

Yeah sure

Case scenario, you got a partner who had all three and somewhere along the line the love was lost and the remaining two are still firmly in place. Given your preference, it's all good.

Let's say you meet a dude you then love or got acquainted with, will that be fine to you since you can love without sex and still find nothing wrong with such scenario?

And if the scenario was reversed as your partner was the one in such shoes and you are certain he is not cheating but his love is with someone else, would that be okay to you?

Gwaihir:


Case scenario, you got a partner who had all three and somewhere along the line the love was lost and the remaining two are still firmly in place. Given your preference, it's all good.

Let's say you meet a dude you then love or got acquainted with, will that be fine to you since you can love without sex and still find nothing wrong with such scenario?

And if the scenario was reversed as your partner was the one in such shoes and you are certain he is not cheating but his love is with someone else, would that be okay to you?

If I had to choose out of the three options I’d take money and sex, yes, but I still value love so it’s not ‘all good’ sha lol

I think it’s possible to love without sex but I wasn’t necessarily talking about myself, I meant that hypothetically it was possible, so I’ve personally never experienced it and I don’t know if I will but other people may have.

I don’t think I could personally love someone romantically and not want to have sex with them so I wouldn’t be fine with that scenario lol, I acknowledged that they aren't the same thing, but they definitely go hand in hand.

ibkayee:

If I had to choose out of the three options I’d take money and sex, yes, but I still value love so it’s not ‘all good’ sha lol

I think it’s possible to love without sex but I wasn’t necessarily talking about myself, I meant that hypothetically it was possible, so I’ve personally never experienced it and I don’t know if I will but other people may have.

I don’t think I could personally love someone romantically and not want to have sex with them so I wouldn’t be fine with that scenario lol, I acknowledged that they aren't the same thing, but they definitely go hand in hand.

please don't mind me for crashing in your discussion
But are you saying though you appreciate love but when push comes to shove (which is the whole point of the thread in the first place) you will choose sex and money
Biko don't mind my manners again, I am a village boy

sunshineG:
please don't mind me for crashing in your discussion
But are you saying though you appreciate love but when push comes to shove (which is the whole point of the thread in the first place) you will choose sex and money
Biko don't mind my manners again, I am a village boy

Yup

Lol no problem!

Are you related to Evans? Cos you just captured my attention

ibkayee:

Yup

Lol no problem!

Piiko:
Are you related to Evans? Cos you just captured my attention

Haha

ibkayee:

If I had to choose out of the three options I’d take money and sex, yes, but I still value love so it’s not ‘all good’ sha lol

I think it’s possible to love without sex but I wasn’t necessarily talking about myself, I meant that hypothetically it was possible, so I’ve personally never experienced it and I don’t know if I will but other people may have.

I don’t think I could personally love someone romantically and not want to have sex with them so I wouldn’t be fine with that scenario lol, I acknowledged that they aren't the same thing, but they definitely go hand in hand.

@emboldened, this is what i wanted you to convey, i am not really interested in the hypothesis of other peoples lives but your own personal practical perspective on the matter. Please do take note.

If you would rather not discuss such things in public, please do say.

Gwaihir:


@emboldened, this is what i wanted you to convey, i am not really interested in the hypothesis of other peoples lives but your own personal practical perspective on the matter. Please do take note.

If you would rather not discuss such things in public, please do say.

Ok, I wanted to make it clear that I was speaking hypothetically because of this part, I thought you were under the impression that I was talking about myself and wanted me to consider the scenario based on that:

Let's say you meet a dude you then love or got acquainted with, will that be fine to you since you can love without sex and still find nothing wrong with such scenario?

To answer your question, it wouldn't be ok with me since it's essentially a form of cheating, we may not be doing anything physical, but there are a variety of ways to express love other than sex and that would be me investing myself emotionally/romantically in another person. I may not be getting everything I want from the current guy, but that doesn't necessarily give me license to find it in someone else whilst still being with him else we'd all have several partners for particular things.

If the guy was providing love and sex without money, for example, it would be like getting acquainted with someone wealthier despite already being in a relationship, so I'd either deal with what I currently have or leave.

Wouldn't be ok if the roles were reversed either.

ibkayee:

Yup

Lol no problem!

OK I feel you sis
Same here
It the mentality of my village anyway
As one great singer always put it
Who you EPP , so who love EPP

1 Money 2 Money

@ibkayee

Thank you for making it transparently clear, your points were cogent as was expected.

I also was of the impression that you could, since you said "yea I would" on the previous quotes but i believe we have got that misunderstanding out the way.

Gwaihir:
@ibkayee

Thank you for making it transparently clear, your points were cogent as was expected.

I also was of the impression that you could, since you said "yea I would" on the previous quotes but i believe we have got that misunderstanding out the way.

Lool

Ahh, when I said yeah I could I was responding to your question about having a level of intimacy with someone I don't love, no problem

sunshineG:
OK I feel you sis
Same here
It the mentality of my village anyway
As one great singer always put it
Who you EPP , so who love EPP

Lool love helps o, but the others better pass

ibkayee:

Lool

Ahh, when I said yeah I could I was responding to your question about having a level of intimacy with someone I don't love, no problem

Sorry if am nitpicking, but the emboldened is ambiguous to me. What exactly, as per sex, because there are forms of sex these days. Is it the whole nine yards or some exclusions. If you can't elucidate on that no problem.

.

ibkayee:

Lol

Just to be clear again, in this case you don't mean casual sex, but a relationship?

Scenario, here you have a dude who you know, has the money and also he is not lacking in the bed departments given the health check and seeing 'it' fitting for you. Now he has chosen to be celibate with you till he is married to you? He has the admirable characters you like. How do you see that relationship?


If you rather we chat offline, do say.

May i add he is not cheating on you with any woman and please do answer as if such men exist, please.

Also, how do you see or explain, love? What is it to you or consider to be love.

Gwaihir:


Just to be clear again, in this case you don't mean casual sex, but a relationship?

Scenario, here you have a dude who you know, has the money and also he is not lacking in the bed departments given the health check and seeing 'it' fitting for you. Now he has chosen to be celibate with you till he is married to you? He has the admirable characters you like. How do you see that relationship?


If you rather we chat offline, do say.

May i add he is not cheating on you with any woman and please do answer as if such men exist, please.

Also, how do you see or explain, love? What is it to you or consider to be love.

Yeah a relationship

Haha it's a relationship I don't mind being a part of

Love? Hmmm, I can't explain tbh

ibkayee:



Love? Hmmm, I can't explain tbh

Really? Ok.

..

Gwaihir:


Really? Ok.

Lol really

ibkayee:

Lol really

Ok, fair enough. You actually cleared some misconceptions i had about you. It appears you had rationalised things based on the 'nature' of some men.

Madam Logic.

Gwaihir:


Ok, fair enough. You actually cleared some misconceptions i had about you. It appears you had rationalised things based on the 'nature' of some men.

Madam Logic.

Lol what do you mean?

Lol I try

ibkayee:

Lol what do you mean?

Lol I try

I mean, you weighed what was most obtainable, tangible and the guarantee that a lady may get in the field of dating to get a good man. Having a critical(which came across cynical to me) view of what men want, what they can offer and from the lady side take those offers that she can compromise on to have at least a steady, fruitful and hopefully long lasting companionship which i think experiences also contributed to also.

I stand to be corrected though.

Gwaihir:


I mean, you weighed what was most obtainable, tangible and the guarantee that a lady may get in the field of dating to get a good man. Having a critical(which came across cynical to me) view of what men want, what they can offer and from the lady side take those offers that she can compromise on to have at least a steady, fruitful and hopefully long lasting companionship which i think experiences also contributed to also.

I stand to be corrected though.

Lol yeah basically

Ibkayee

I have some questions.

Gwaihir:
Ibkayee

I have some questions.

Ok what are they?

ibkayee:

Ok what are they?

I know you said, you could, as well as stating it would probably not work but weren't aversed to it.

Thus, i am curious in trying to enter into such relationship, i presume you would take some precautions because the possibility for a dude to up and leave after he has had the intimacy is there, he may even present a very convincing demeanor that would suggest he wouldn't. So how then do you gauge to a considerable degree, that is not what he is after since there is no emotions to look out for(not that those with emotions, such do not happen)?

I know this question may seem.like revealing your guide points,, if you rather not answer do say. I have just one other question.

Gwaihir:


I know you said, you could, as well as stating it would probably not work but weren't aversed to it.

Thus, i am curious in trying to enter into such relationship, i presume you would take some precautions because the possibility for a dude to up and leave after he has had the intimacy is there, he may even present a very convincing demeanor that would suggest he wouldn't. So how then do you gauge to a considerable degree, that is not what he is after since there is no emotions to look out for(not that those with emotions, such do not happen)?

I know this question may seem.like revealing your guide points, if you rather not answer do say. I have just one other question.

Eh, there's no sure way of finding out to be honest, I guess I try to focus on tell tale signs that indicate that he's genuinely into me as a person and the relationship, can't think of every single thing I do but I'm generally very cautious when it comes to relationships, not saying it's necessarily foolproof though