pocohantas:


Oga, this is 2017...not 1920.
She is 17, you're 30.
Is she already in the university?
Have it in mind that she would pass through uni and serve before the average parent would want her to settle down, especially if they are comfortable. Some may say she must get a job first.

Within those years, you'll also get older and her taste will change too. Same way you seek a younger lady for your selfish reasons, she might also consider you too old, you will be almost 40.

While you're grooming her, better find a way to know her and her family plans.

Like you rightly said, this is 2017 and not those days when parents used to decide everything that involves their children's future. Even if her parents were rich, they can't tell her to go to the University, go to service, get a job and bla bla bla before getting married. This is preposterous. Girls don't have much time on their side do they should be allowed to decide when to settle down. Can't a lady go to the University or get a job after marriage?
By the way, with the increasing number of unemployed graduates in this country, how many girls still want to waste their time and resources in the higher institution?
I know my girlfriend and her family so well. She's not a higher institution freak and her family is too poor to even think about that.

nice one guy

Very true. Guys take note.

gentlegenius:

Your comment is borne out of stark ignorance. Sometimes, it is better to be silent on sensitive issues than to make unreasonable comments.
Haven't you seen couples with more than 13 years age difference being happily married? I explained in my previous comments that I am not just dating this girl but I am grooming her to be a good wife material so that I can marry her in future. Don't you get it? How dare you tell me to leave her and date my mate? As a man, will you marry a lady that is your age mate? Don't you know women gets old faster than men? What if I leave her and she ends up marrying someone older than me?

Does a woman's age multiply or she biologically degrades quicker than a man? All these hapless myths

Safiaa:
Very true. Guys take note.

I am still sick

Kay17:


A wolf says he is helping herd the lambs into the barn.

You are entitled to your opinion but it doesn't change anything here.

I think I'm somehow guilty of No. 2.
I invested more than her in the relationship. I tried a lot more than her to make our relationship move forward. But I think she is not keeping me in the friend zone. As a matter of fact, she loves me and had feelings for me. I haven't slept with her because she is still a teenager and a virgin for that matter. But many times, we have engaged ourselves in deep romance.
The problem is that sometimes she avoids me for no reason. I have been acting like a boyfriend but sometimes she doesn't act like my girlfriend. She hasn't invested anything to move the relationship forward even when she knows I've invested a lot. This makes me worry whether she really loves me or she is putting me in the friend zone. I'm really confused about what to do. Since she's still young, naive and inexperienced, Should I stop investing in the relationship and risk losing her or should I continue investing and risk being in her friend zone? [/quote]
Same here bro

I don't think I would mind if you claimed to love the girl but to say you are grooming her for marriage, you are a self.ish human being. I won't be surprised if you are a psychopath too. I pray reality hits you in the face. Control freak!

gentlegenius:

Your comment is borne out of stark ignorance. Sometimes, it is better to be silent on sensitive issues than to make unreasonable comments.
Haven't you seen couples with more than 13 years age difference being happily married? I explained in my previous comments that I am not just dating this girl but I am grooming her to be a good wife material so that I can marry her in future. Don't you get it? How dare you tell me to leave her and date my mate? As a man, will you marry a lady that is your age mate? Don't you know women gets old faster than men? What if I leave her and she ends up marrying someone older than me?

Piiko:
I am still sick

Pele.

myking95:


Respect for oneself is important for a man. First work know yourself to be amazing that you cannot be scared of being alone with yourself. Then make your offer very clear, of she says no.. .acccept it with dignity.. .move on.. .but never make stupid sacrifices iwanna n the name of being friends with hopes of getting thru to her. If she wanna be friends.. .let her be d one making the offer and maintaining it.. .dont be like the first nigga. In the meantime tell her your mind, confidently and plainly.. And live your life with another lady.
There is no such thing like the "one". Work on your self, your finances, your personality and see attraction from the opposite sex.
Don't be a wuss

lol bro are you actually advising me or teaching me on how to woo a lady? because it looks like that's what you're doing besides I never asked for an advice....

and i have no inferiority complex thank you, my finances for an unemployed self sustaining person can comfortably pay a graduate, plus my sex life is something I am proud of.....why the fuss?

Safiaa:
Pele.

I will skip work and rest all day

gentlegenius:

Like you rightly said, this is 2017 and not those days when parents used to decide everything that involves their children's future. Even if her parents were rich, they can't tell her to go to the University, go to service, get a job and bla bla bla before getting married. This is preposterous. Girls don't have much time on their side do they should be allowed to decide when to settle down. Can't a lady go to the University or get a job after marriage?
By the way, with the increasing number of unemployed graduates in this country, how many girls still want to waste their time and resources in the higher institution?

I know my girlfriend and her family so well. She's not a higher institution freak and her family is too poor to even think about that.

No wonder...say no more.

gentlegenius:

Why not define CHILD ABUSE on your own since you don't subscribe to my definition and explanations above.
When did it becomes an abuse to love and take care of a teenage girl? When did it becomes an abuse to guide and control a teenage girl? Didn't your father or senior brother perform these roles in your life when you were a teenager? Was that an abuse? Pls be more reasonable when you respond to sensitive issues.

The consensus here is that your acts are perverse. Not because of the age difference but because you are depriving a child of her innocence and identifying her through lens of sexual beauty.

pocohantas:

No wonder...say no more.

really dear no wonder

kennykendo:



lol bro are you actually advising me or teaching me on how to woo a lady? because it looks like that's what you're doing besides I never asked for an advice....

and i have no inferiority complex thank you, my finances for an unemployed self sustaining person can comfortably pay a graduate, plus my sex life is something I am proud of.....why the fuss?

Not advising u. The term "you" in this construct is an abstract pronoun describing a noun "A man". Not necessarily you Mr. All the best

xxxtedyxxx:


it will work for everyone.

All girls are the same, in the sense that, they feel attraction the same way.

Biodun's delivery might not be accurate, but the basic foundational principles and techniques remains the same worldwide.

Your first error is too assume all women have the exact same psyche and to discount the influence of culture religion and personality.

kennykendo:


really dear no wonder

LOL.
You've been watching from the sidelines?
He is not as altruistic as he thinks he is...

Sterope:
I don't think I would mind if you calmed to love the girl but to say you are grooming her for marriage, you are a self.ish humna being. I won't be surprised if you are a psychopath too. I pray reality hits you in the face.

You can call me whatever you like. That is your opinion but it doesn't change anything here.
Were you expecting me to leave her for now so that others young boys who don't even care about marrying her could get the chance to date her, corrupt her ruin her and impact her negatively and dump her only for me to go and marry her when she gets older? No way. Call it selfishness, I don't care. Go and preach this to fools not a sensible guy like me.
Times have changed so do sensible people.

One simple lesson I've taken away from my relations with women is that you don't make yourself a fool for them.They don't actually know what they want so, they respond to stimuli about them.
Another curious thing about this sex is that they seem to have this innate lust for mild violence, and being dominated. Yes,I see it in many women.A kind of sadomasichistic taste.

Menzy86:
"if a woman wants to friendzone you, even jupiter himself cannot change it" Exactly bro u understand the vibe. I commented a live experience earlier to this effect.

of course bro I mean every guy at some point in his life gets friend zoned, maybe not now but later.
There are three ways to handle this

1 You really do love this girl and she friend zoned you because you were being yourself, if you can't stand the rejection per se, you simply walk out and maintain silence.


2. Don't push further when it is clear she's friend zoned you, you can stay away for a while and avoid her....

3. If you can deal with it, continue being friends but don't chip it in again, look for someone else if possible her sister

pocohantas:
LOL. You've been watching from the sidelines? He is not as altruistic as he thinks he is...

lol no he isn't, he is somewhat centripetally minded...

Kay17:


Your first error is too assume all women have the exact same psyche and to discount the influence of culture religion and personality.

One bottle of cold orijin for you...

Knew it!!!

You are not a genius. You are just a manipulative freak. I am happy you realised that you are not smart enough to play tricks on people at par or above you.


You are aleady ruined. Iisnt that the reason you are looking for someone that wouldn't mind your pathetic self.

gentlegenius:

Like you rightly said, this is 2017 and not those days when parents used to decide everything that involves their children's future. Even if her parents were rich, they can't tell her to go to the University, go to service, get a job and bla bla bla before getting married. This is preposterous. Girls don't have much time on their side do they should be allowed to decide when to settle down. Can't a lady go to the University or get a job after marriage?
By the way, with the increasing number of unemployed graduates in this country, how many girls still want to waste their time and resources in the higher institution?
I know my girlfriend and her family so well. She's not a higher institution freak and her family is too poor to even think about that.

gentlegenius:

Your comment is borne out of stark ignorance. Sometimes, it is better to be silent on sensitive issues than to make unreasonable comments.
Haven't you seen couples with more than 13 years age difference being happily married? I explained in my previous comments that I am not just dating this girl but I am grooming her to be a good wife material so that I can marry her in future. Don't you get it? How dare you tell me to leave her and date my mate? As a man, will you marry a lady that is your age mate? Don't you know women gets old faster than men? What if I leave her and she ends up marrying someone older than me?

mr man stop justifying ur stupidity,dt girl should concentrate on studies nt been hooked up to u a a tender age.she is stil small to be in relation.allow her concentrate

The day you people will realise that there is no formula, every girl does not want the same thing that day you will know how to get a girl without reading from a one- size-fits-all adviser. What happened to being yourself and finding the one who complements you, instead of acting? That's how you get tired. ... You can only make a girl like you if she was unsure, not a girl who really don't want you. Follow all the rules and you'd only make it easier for her to leave.

Kay17:


The consensus here is that your acts are perverse. Not because of the age difference but because you are depriving a child of her innocence and identifying her through lens of sexual beauty.

If you follow this discussion very well, you will find out that there is no consensus opinion here. Some are thinking like you while some are encouraging me to continue my relationship. Check this thread carefully and you'll see a guy of 29 who is dating a girl of 17 and they are getting married early next year. If you call my actions perverse, what will you call this guy? At least I am only dating her for now and will only marry her when she turns 19 or 20. Even if I am not dating her now, another guy will surely be dating her.

Lalas247:
Orisirisi

These are all ur accts abi?...Continue!!!
Nairaland guys will fall on u soon

bukas15:
mr man stop justifying ur stupidity,dt girl should concentrate on studies nt been hooked up to u a a tender age.she is stil small to be in relation.allow her concentrate

the only problem I have with what he is saying is that he is involving her in romance at that age, a girl you claim to be grooming.

@gentlegenius ..Dude you are setting yourself up for heartbreak, I know a story like yours. Just don't come to nl to call all women bad after your mistakes

Biggers82:
You just wrote a beautiful nonsense

And u just made a wonderful post. Cheers 2u.

pocohantas:


No wonder...say no more.

I'm weak AF !!
nairaland keeps surprising me every damn time I visit .... chai!!!
bad part is that he seems educated,the whole drama looks like all those shitty 86 yr old king marries a 22 ur old as his 6th wife story.

Shameless can't describe this !!
It sounds pedophilc even though it isn't,d guy should give the girl at least 5 years breathing space for forks sake.

I feel he tried dating his own age grade but all efforts were futile so he went for a younger poor one.

Damn why did I read that post!!!!

Ochima75:



Hmmmm so wat do u do? When u gv opportunity 4her to invest bak nd u she doesn't?lts say i call once in 3days to check on her or tlk to her nd after a wk of u not calling she didn't stl call? Wts d way 4wd sir

Go and do facial surgery

Ochima75:



Hmmmm so wat do u do? When u gv opportunity 4her to invest bak nd u she doesn't?lts say i call once in 3days to check on her or tlk to her nd after a wk of u not calling she didn't stl call? Wts d way 4wd sir

Go and do facial surgery