dangotesmummy:
education plays a big role but you know in Nigeria today education is only for the children of the rich and middle class.

Poor people refuse to listen hence they recycle or transfer their poverty and staunch belief system to their children

Social education or government cannot do the work because I was opportuned to go and greet my aunty who's a nurse at government hospital so she told me to wait at the reception so she could attend to some patients that she's coming

While waiting I was watching and observing a section of the hospital were they were government health workers were enlightening and encouraging illiterate women/mothers not to have children they cannot take care of and they should come for family planning and all that

After the whole meeting I heard a woman say in yoruba "is it government that will tell me take care or train my child" it's God that trains children bla bla bla so this thing is beyond government. Its a cultural thing that says my grandmother had 11 children, my mother had 15 children so I must have 18 children. Its a competition among illiterate women hence its only education that can illuminate their minds and break the strong hold of their poverty mentality and the recycling of poverty

Sure culture plays a big role. But culture is not static. It has been evolving steadily. Enlightenment should not be encountered first in hospital. It should begin with community field nurses & midwives, at school and well before childbearing age.

At the moment, the govt hardly justifies the right to tell people what to do with their own reproductive rights. It has no social welfare system to assist the poor, needy or large families.

For example, you are more likely to take the advice of your caring parents, uncle or aunt than those that care less or are aloof. Same with government. Only those who realise that such advice is in own interest irrespective of government attitude that will take it. And that would be better educated, enlightened and those who can weigh things properly.

People need to be empowered. For example targeting uneducated young mothers to take up adult education. In a functioning federal system local councils can be empowered to handle such adult and social education.

Gerrard59:


Pathetic. Appalling. Ridiculous.

Same here. A man whose mason business has seen less demand and contracts decided to worsen his situation and added two kids to three = five children, who are not being fed properly, looked after well and have not started schooling (which if/when they do won't be at proper schools)

Yet another just procreated his 7th child and he relies on his "Pastoral job" to make ends stay afar (surely ends cannot meet). I advised him not to further procreate. I talk tire, offered simple solutions (use condoms, I'll pay for your vasectomy or give the children to orphanages). He did not heed to it.


A false claim people make is that "children are blessings from God". It's a false and deceiving statement. Agberos, Boko Haramites, Evans, Ritualists were "blessings" too. Children become blessings when they are well taken care ADEQUATELY taken care of.

I have left such persons to their fate and focused my fertility activism on the next generation (my contemporaries).

"Giving birth is cheap, raising them is expensive" (Gerrard59, 2016).

I don't discuss with poor people because no matter how much you talk and how many examples you give they'll still do what they want to do and if you keep talking in it they'll say your own is too much so the easiest thing is to mind your business

When they come knocking on my gate for money for school fees and all,once I look through my window and see they're the ones I'll just leave them to knock forever
Forget it the poor think differently and you cannot Change their orientation except maybe they're opportuned to leave their familiar terrain and see how the wealthy or middle class live their lives

dayowunmi:

Relax, read the post again, the op advised that first of all the wife must also be doing some kind of work just to supplement what the man is bringing in and also the Two of them must suspend child bearing until they earn better wages! is it that u didn't read the post or you just ignore those salient points? The fact remains that close to 50% of Nigerians live below the poverty rate, even the educated ones are hardly gainfully employed, will they stay single for ever? if you ask me, I certainly don't see the evil in the advise of the op. Life is all about management and proper planning. Earning big wages will not matter if you don't plan, a secretary can be a landlord while his boss is still a tenant. Relax pls.

u r very right....most of dem dint even read d article. Dy just jump in to comment trash.......everybody formin bigman and big gal...... If a gal creates a topic dat she cnt marry a guy earning less dan 100k now, Dy wud crucify her..

Stellie:
hmmm comments above me tho...
Thumbs up op.. D bitter truth is most people who earn dis amount and even less, already hav a family... Som r even dying to hav dis almount of salary..
Hmm lyf isnt a bed of roses.. Somtyms we need to visit ghetto and see hard lyf... Hmm nice write up op.. To dat oga sayin nice piece of bullshit hmmm i cn only smh....

Would you marry a guy that earns 20k. Or you are just playing to NL guys to get a gold star which by the way, you have succeeded.
People live on it but it does not mean it is ok. Minimum wage is 18k but there is hardly anyone of them without an alternative source of income especially when they know there is a wife and children.
The problem is really the ones that are content with that money and dont try to do more.
Would YOU marry a man earning 20k?

ImaIma1:


Would you marry a guy that earns 20k. Or you are just playing to NL guys to get a gold star which by the way, you have succeeded.
People live on it but it does not mean it is ok. Minimum wage is 18k but there is hardly anyone of them without an alternative source of income especially when they know there is a wife and children.
The problem is really the ones that are content with that money and dont try to do more.
Would YOU marry a man earning 20k?

read d topic carefully , den read my post.., slowly....
Did u say am aimin 4 a gold star from nairaland guys?? ... *** girls wahala too much***

crunchyg:
You are a simple definition of beauty and brain.

awwwnn so swit of u

Stellie:
read d topic carefully , den read my post.., slowly....
Did u say am aimin 4 a gold star from nairaland guys?? ... *** girls wahala too much***

I am not a slow reader.
I see you could not answer my question. It's aiit

dayowunmi:

God bless you. The op only gave a perspective on how those with low income can get married and ppl are castigating him. What is the ratio of people earning steady 20k sef? All those people criticizing him are only doing so because they have rich parents.

u dey mind them
Ask all of them with their forming attitude if Dem apply for Npower or not
Most of them were the ones clamouring for 5k per youth Buhari's promise
You will be surprised if you actually see all of them In real life
Your eyes will be like

Arondizuogu:


I don't know about others you mentioned but I know welders earn more than bankers. Those dude are rich.

Bros not all categories of welders o.

Randy91:





I always revere you for ur sensible comments on this platform...

I was thinking, u were going to move in Lalas247 direction as the KING OF UKWU

Thank jehova,u closed ur senses from there(Ukwu) and stated wats practicable....


Nice1 Niggur!!!

Lalas247 is a city babe na so u suppose understand
some couples even live on less sef
but for such couples its either one of the parents go give out lodging space for im house for the intending couples or the parents will assist the intending couples in renting a home.and such couples reside in the township where things are not so expensive.but to totally depend on dat 20k in a city like lagos or abuja and be married on top of it with kids..dat is suicide

PierreDeFermat:
Hilary is such a beautiful lady. I like her smile too and way she looks when she laughs. but I think her type can never be a good president cos she seem like a pretender

yea Hillary is very beautiful.u need to see her when she was younger.hmm maybe she wouldnt have been a very good president but then compared to trump she was the better option.

dayowunmi:

Relax, read the post again, the op advised that first of all the wife must also be doing some kind of work just to supplement what the man is bringing in and also the Two of them must suspend child bearing until they earn better wages! is it that u didn't read the post or you just ignore those salient points? The fact remains that close to 50% of Nigerians live below the poverty rate, even the educated ones are hardly gainfully employed, will they stay single for ever? if you ask me, I certainly don't see the evil in the advise of the op. Life is all about management and proper planning. Earning big wages will not matter if you don't plan, a secretary can be a landlord while his boss is still a tenant. Relax pls.

Truth is life is unpredictable, what if the better job doesn't come? What if the wife or husband falls sick within the so called management period? There is no planning with 20k that can help you in this present day Nigeria the goods and services are costly.
Have you thought about the woman getting pregnant while they still have the low earning job? What happens then? They will be like "oh you know it wasn't planned" guess what? No one fucking cares. The blame will be on you and you alone.
Like someone said this is a poverty propagation thread and should be deleted.
Do you even think a lady who earns higher will marry a man earning 20k? The OP projects this idea of an utopian marriage and so forth.

dangotesmummy:
times have changed.20k in the late 80s or early 90s isn't the same again. The challenges of youths in the late 80s and early 90s isn't the same again.house rent in the late 80s and early 90s isn't the same.we live in more perilous, dangerous and unpredictable times now

Stop comparing when you were 19 then and now

gbam!

Stellie:
u r very right....most of dem dint even read d article. Dy just jump in to comment trash.......everybody formin bigman and big gal...... If a gal creates a topic dat she cnt marry a guy earning less dan 100k now, Dy wud crucify her..

Most Nigerians are pretenders and unrealistic or maybe disconnected from reality is the more approximate term! Let's just thank god for ourselves but we must realize that the desire of every human being is happiness and companionship, and everybody deserves that regardless of socio economic status. someone was saying a man must have a regular salary of 100k before marriage! how many jobs pay that amount apart from federal government jobs? Using 100k as yardstick for marriage is tantamount to saying if you don't have a federal government appointment or a top company appointment don't marry.

Habeyy:
u dey mind them
Ask all of them with their forming attitude if Dem apply for Npower or not
Most of them were the ones clamouring for 5k per youth Buhari's promise
You will be surprised if you actually see all of them In real life
Your eyes will be like

My brother, Nigerians and pretense no get part 2. Everybody be forming slay girl and slay boy behind keyboard, all na wash! Some of them can't boast of 20k in account right now or even 100naira airtime presently.

dayowunmi:

My brother, Nigerians and pretense no get part 2. Everybody be forming slay girl and slay boy behind keyboard, all na wash! Some of them can't boast of 20k in account right now or even 100naira airtime presently.

Nothing like slay queen and slay king oga, if you don't have enough money to take care of family needs, do not marry.

Arondizuogu:


Truth is life is unpredictable, what if the better job doesn't come? What if the wife or husband falls sick within the so called management period? There is no planning with 20k that can help you in this present day Nigeria the goods and services are costly.
Have you thought about the woman getting pregnant while they still have the low earning job? What happens then? They will be like "oh you know it wasn't planned" guess what? No one fucking cares. The blame will be on you and you alone.
Like someone said this is a poverty propagation thread and should be deleted.
Do you even think a lady who earns higher will marry a man earning 20k? The OP projects this idea of an utopian marriage and so forth.

Hmm, nice comment, I will try to respond accordingly. what if the good job don't come? he doesn't have to wait for job, there are other means of making money aside waiting for a office job, I didn't apply for Npower cos I make about the amount npower pays from writing essays and articles on fiverr, there are legitimate hussles a man can engage in that can generate income. what if the wife falls sick? Even with a good income a person can still fall sick and their income may not be able to treat! what happens when the woman gets pregnant, the husband increases his hussle! Do u think a lady will marry a man with 20k income? Not every lady is a slay Queen, some of the big men around today married their wives when they were nothing and they stayed with them...the op cited bishop oyedepo and fela durotoye (i think) who are multimillionaires today but married when they were hardly thousandnaire! Yes there are women who don't rate love by the size of bank account. We all belong to different socio economic levels, you can't hold everyone to your standards! What you earn as income is somebody's chicken change, all fingers are not equal and will never be, its wrong for u to posit that people have to be of some particular status before marriage. So far as the man has a job with regular income of 20k and above and the wife also does something that brings income, I feel they are good to go. Not everyone eats Turkey everyday or lives in duplex! The irony is that people with still av sex whether job or no job!

Arondizuogu:


Nothing like slay queen and slay king oga, if you don't have enough money to take care of family needs, do not marry.

k

dayowunmi:

My brother, Nigerians and pretense no get part 2. Everybody be forming slay girl and slay boy behind keyboard, all na wash! Some of them can't boast of 20k in account right now or even 100naira airtime presently.

Naija for show Someone in his thinking came up with a practical view
Instead of them to add to the vibe, see them bloke head bashing the op
Nobody is saying a lifestyle of 20k Is glamorous but many are still it in that bracket
The question we should ask ourselves is why people with lower income level are getting married and doing right while we the self acclaimed pepper them gang and slay mamas are counting relationship upon relationships and Saturdays upon Saturdays
Abeg make we keep the epistle of our imaginary expensive g string panties to ourselves
Be a good critique not a pessimistic slowpoke who yawp at all times
God bless you bro

dayowunmi:

Hmm, nice comment, I will try to respond accordingly. what if the good job don't come? he doesn't have to wait for job, there are other means of making money aside waiting for a office job, I didn't apply for Npower cos I make about the amount npower pays from writing essays and articles on fiverr, there are legitimate hussles a man can engage in that can generate income. what if the wife falls sick? Even with a good income a person can still fall sick and their income may not be able to treat! what happens when the woman gets pregnant, the husband increases his hussle! Do u think a lady will marry a man with 20k income? No every lady is a slay Queen, some of the big men around today married their wives when they were nothing and they stayed with them...the op cited bishop oyedepo and fela durotoye (i think) who are multimillionaires today but married when they were hardly thousandnaire! Yes there are women who don't rate love by the size of bank account. We all belong to different socio economic levels, you can't hold everyone to your standards! What you earn as income is somebody's chicken change, all fingers are not equal and will never be, its wrong for u to posit that people have to be of some particular status before marriage. So far as the man has a job with regular income of 20k and above and the wife also does something that brings income, I feel they are good to go. Not everyone eats Turkey everyday or lives in duplex! The irony is that people with still av sex whether job or no job!

ur reasoning is out of this world
God bless you

Habeyy:
Naija for show Someone in his thinking came up with a practical view
Instead of them to add to the vibe, see them bloke head bashing the op
Nobody is saying a lifestyle of 20k Is glamorous but many are still it in that bracket
The question we should ask ourselves is why people with lower income level are getting married and doing right while we the self acclaimed pepper them gang and slay mamas are counting relationship upon relationships and Saturdays upon Saturdays
Abeg make we keep the epistle of our imaginary expensive g string panties to ourselves
Be a good critique not a pessimistic slowpoke who yawp at all times
God bless you bro

My brother the thing just tire me, maybe poor people should kuku go and hang themselves nigbayen. There are graduates out there working as teachers in private school where the pay is less than or equal to 20k so they should stay single forever! By all means I am comfortable and I thank god for that but I also realize there are people who earn less comfortable but they also deserve happiness! going by the recommendations of these guys most artisans should be single. Regardless of what we say, people will fvck so why not marry instead of going to brothel?

Habeyy:
Naija for show Someone in his thinking came up with a practical view
Instead of them to add to the vibe, see them bloke head bashing the op
Nobody is saying a lifestyle of 20k Is glamorous but many are still it in that bracket
The question we should ask ourselves is why people with lower income level are getting married and doing right while we the self acclaimed pepper them gang and slay mamas are counting relationship upon relationships and Saturdays upon Saturdays
Abeg make we keep the epistle of our imaginary expensive g string panties to ourselves
Be a good critique not a pessimistic slowpoke who yawp at all times
God bless you bro

My brother the thing just tire me

lefulefu:

Lalas247 is a city babe na so u suppose understand
some couples even live on less sef
but for such couples its either one of the parents go give out lodging space for im house for the intending couples or the parents will assist the intending couples in renting a home.and such couples reside in the township where things are not so expensive.but to totally depend on dat 20k in a city like lagos or abuja and be married on top of it with kids..dat is suicide

very true....

lefulefu:

Lalas247 is a city babe na so u suppose understand
some couples even live on less sef
but for such couples its either one of the parents go give out lodging space for im house for the intending couples or the parents will assist the intending couples in renting a home.and such couples reside in the township where things are not so expensive.but to totally depend on dat 20k in a city like lagos or abuja and be married on top of it with kids..dat is suicide

Randy91:



very true....

Who be city babe.... I dey country side

ImaIma1:


Even okrika is not 50naira. Can the 20k buy one designer attire? She must buy diapers or will the baby shit on the mother's hand?
OP is EVIL

must you buy designers. Did you use pampers. No be something de before pampers

Lalas247:


Who be city babe.... I dey country side

which country side dey london?
see as guys jus dey hammer u weda na gucci underwear u dey wear
another one dey analyse say na probably victoria secrets u dey wear
laugh wan kill me

lefulefu:

which country side dey london?
see as guys jus dey hammer u weda na gucci underwear u dey wear
another one dey analyse say na probably victoria secrets u dey wear
laugh wan kill me

Iffa hear I say I dey country abi wetin
That 20k nearly make some ppl slice my pant one guy said he will resell the pant
Dem don suck my blood finish next time I go dey look make dem ride on with the wedding ko kan mi

Lalas247:

Iffa hear I say I dey country abi wetin
That 20k nearly make some ppl slice my pant one guy said he will resell the pant
Dem don suck my blood finish next time I go dey look make dem ride on with the wedding ko kan mi

u know the funny thin inside
as dem dey bash ur dp na So the likes for ur dp dey increase
na who be d ppl wey dey like ur dp ?
same guys wey dey bash am
so dat means secretly dem gbadu ur hips d same way me and Randy91 gbadu am

Lalas247:


Who be city babe.... I dey country side

Lolz.... is nt as if I can't dare marry a woman like u Lalas247...bt I ll go for one that d whole pant she ll buy in a year ll nt b more than 3k



Kaiiiii...a strand of thread on ur pant more than 20k?

Na GOLD PLATE pant u dey wear

lefulefu:

u know the funny thin inside
as dem dey bash ur dp na So the likes for ur dp dey increase
na who be d ppl wey dey qlike ur dp ?
same guys wey dey bash am
so dat means secretly dem gbadu ur hips d same way me and Randy91 gbadu am

That Ukwu she gat is more than Divine......bt there are better Ukwus out there wey their pant in a year is nt even more than 3k and neat down there...


Abeg Buhari is back,I ll go 4 those Ukwu that r MAGNIFICENT in shape and HUMBLE at sight....


Lalas247 Ukwu is rugged at sight...all these island guys don too taste am......


#TeamVirginUkwu

mikolo80:
must you buy designers. Did you use pampers. No be something de before pampers

Guy i have been baby shopping and i have not bought one single designer item and i can tell you that a family needs to be prepared financially.
Even the list the hospital gives you for the necessary things you will need is not what a 20k monthly salary will support.
Even if you use cloth napkin, you will still spend money to buy it and spend money to treat rashes often because u can be sure that with napkin comes rashes.
I am a very practical and objective person. Before i go ahead with something, i weigh the options to avoid major problems later. Nobody likes to go around begging for assistance everytime. If it is once in a while, it is ok.
Someone that earns 20k and wants to start a family should have another source of income.