This is one of key decisions one must make in life. For some,it is easy while for others it is difficult but for me, It is dicey. When choosing a life partner some criteria must be critically considered. Among which are:

1.Genotype :
Endeavor to know your genotype and that of your potential partner before going deep into a relationship. Do not bargain else you are postponing a lifetime problem. Your children stand the risk of sickle cell and this will definitely be a problem in your marriage.There are 6 genotypes(AA,AC CC,AS,SC and SS)..A man with AA can marry anyone without any problem (medically); likewise the woman.

make sure the genotype of you and your partner don't match up in a way as to produce a children with SS, SC and CC.

AA: normal
AS: don't show any symptoms
AC: don't show any symptoms
SS: sickle cell disease (sicklers)
CC: Most people do not have symptoms. Occasionally, jaundice may occur.
Complications of Hemoglobin C dsx
Sometimes, they may experience the following:
Cholelithiasis (gall stones that may require treatment)
Splenomegaly (big spleen)
Angloid streaks (causing poor vision)
Aplastic crises (due to viral infection): episode of severe anemia

SC? This condition is associated with recurrent anemia (breakdown of red cells in the blood vessels) and pain crises (vaso-occlusive crises). Some may also experience aseptic necrosis of the thigh bone (femur).
Summary is that it is bad

PLEASE NOTE THIS AND HELP SHARE WITH A Friend
A man or woman with AS or AC or SS or SC or CC (very rare) cannot marry each other, if they want to avoid SS or SC.
They must marry a partner with AA, if they don't want to born a child with Sickle cell syndrome.
If AS or AC marry each other, they have 25% chance of having a sickle child at every birth. If they marry SS or SC, they have 50% chance of having a sickle cell child at every birth.
Please note all their kids could be AS AC or AA.
If SS or SC marry each other, it's is nothing other than a terrible disaster.
All their children will have Sickle cell
SC and SS are almost the same only that SS suffers more severe crisis than SC carrier. You might not notice the presence of the disease on the body of SC carrier, unlike in SS.

Children should be blessings and not problems. So avoid this as much as you can.


2. Marry your type..

When it is time to settle down,most guys look for "wife material". What is "wife material"? Going to religious places regularly on sundays,midweek services and revivals,Cleaning the house and remaining indoors. no social life, etc. Most times what we call "wife material" might not be "wife material" if it is not complimentary. A guy who is only a sunday-sunday religious tonic or doesnt even go to any religious house, goes to club, loves to hang out and very social has no business with the so called "wife material" above. I mean, Sister Angel(Rukayat) should date Brother Israel(Taofeek) while "Otunba excess funds" should just go for "Sexy pretty slay Diva".. Without this, Most times, one of the partners suffer at the end of the day.

For someone like me who goes to a religious house and not even devoted, hangs out and socialise, I am complimentary with a lady who can slay and also serve God. Someone who can watch Trace Tv with me and also sing religious songs. Someone who can atleast take red wine abi Smirnoff ice. Thats just a perfect combo!!! You need not deceive yourself. Marriage is meant to be enjoyed and not to be endured.

Note: Sister Angel(Rukayat) and Bro Israel(Taofeek) will go for religious services together,drink their five alive, watch religious TV stations and they will just get along!!

Dont marry someone of contrasting characters with the hope that you can change him or her. You are not God!!


3: Financial stability:

Before you say I do, Ensure there is a degree of financial stability. Atleast when your incomes are merged, It can foot the basic bills of life (Feeding, Rent and clothing)..Responsibilities should atleast be 70% of the man and 30% of the woman just because of the economy we find ourselves. It is just advisable your potential partner has a job or a business that is bringing in some cash(No matter how little) and then you can work on increasing the cash flow with time. Dont marry because he is a graduate and with time he will get a job. Education is not to put food on the table, It is to ensure you develop your talents or skills. When you get a job, you sell your skills and get paid for it. But when a job is not forth coming, Just think of how to put food on the table. "Shebi" Illiterates "dey" marry and fend for their families.


4: Educational standard or class:

As "not important" this may be, It has its merits.I am always of the opinion that Formal education is just certification. Some people are lucky to have it. It doesnt really mean that a BSC holder(who is vast in knowledge) can not teach a PHD holder some things.Education is not directly success.The fact that you didnt go to school does not mean you wont be successful but ability to communicate in English may also be important.Though English is just a language and doesnt tell how intelligent one is,I will not want to marry a spouse whose response to "Happy birthday" is "I wish you the same" hahahahahah.


5: Finally. Marry your friend!!

This is where love comes into play. The potential partner should be your best friend. Someone who can go through thick and thin with you. Someone who gat your back at all times. Remember, it takes two to tango and it takes atleast 2 to marry. Marriage is between 2 people who are willing to sacrifice to stay together. 2 people who value the friendship. When the bond is great, criteria like Religion,Ethnicity,age and some physical attributes remain inconsequential but attimes, physical attributes can get you the attention of a potential partner. Like I am allergic to Ugly girls.I wont even say "Hello"...LOL

If you want this to hit fp you should modify your view about religion, it is one sided.





Nairaland is a secular forum OK!!

fk001:
If you want this to hit fp you should modify your view about religion, it is one sided.





Nairaland is a secular forum OK!!

Modified. Thanks

Dlordsamurai:
100% accurate... op infact i feel like giving you 500 ruff riders for this well articulated thread... this is what romance thread should look like....where we can actually learn and engage in intelligent convo.. op well done.

Thanks

this is really nice info .. I'm learning about this cc genotype for the first time

OK seen


next

Nice write up.

i am so against most of this points, the last one is ok by me (marry yr best friend), genotype shit was not thier in the anchient dayx, and i hav 2 daughters now who are doing perfectly well health wise, i have never walked into any hospital/lab for genotype test, i wonder how you will feel when someone dates your sis for 3years and when its time to settle, the guy says they cant marry becos of genotype, am a lazy typer, i would have given more points.

n/b: God first in any relationship, and you will see allthis genotype thing is a total waste of time and effort, our parents never did it, even if they did, thier parents never did it, yet they marry 5 wives with 7 children each, and all are ok health wise, above all, marry your best friend, this does not mean you guys should be "best friends", it simply means marry someone who you can be free to share everything with, even your deepest secret.

You have said it all

Nice one Op.

Lemme bookmark, i Just might need it..
Nice.

I will say what's on my mind if this hit FP

Nice

vchykp:
i am so against most of this points, the last one is ok by me (marry yr best friend), genotype shit was not thier in the anchient dayx, and i hav 2 daughters now who are doing perfectly well health wise, i have never walked into any hospital/lab for genotype test, i wonder how you will feel when someone dates your sis for 3years and when its time to settle, the guy says they cant marry becos of genotype, am a lazy typer, i would have given more points.

n/b: God first in any relationship, and you will see allthis genotype thing is a total waste of time and effort, our parents never did it, even if they did, thier parents never did it, yet they marry 5 wives with 7 children each, and all are ok health wise, above all, marry your best friend, this does not mean you guys should be "best friends", it simply means marry someone who you can be free to share everything with, even your deepest secret.

You are saying this because you don't have a relative that is a sickler and the suffering they go through, if you do, you must check your genotype before you marry if you are an AS.

When the stress associated with dealing with sickler comes in, you will be frustrated and the love will fade.

I know few sicklers and most of them are dead, the pain the pass through is out of the world, money their parents waste is much and they die or suffer in pain.

I just feel pity when I meet one and I blame the parents for that cos they would have prevented that from happening to them.

Don't let mumu love blind you, love fades and marriage is for a life time.
The best thing you can do for your future children if you are an AS is to prevent them from being a sickler, cos you will regret it if you don't, don't be saying God will change your children genotype, heaven help those who help themselves.
Be wise.

I heard IVF can be used to overcome this genotype ish. Don't know how true that is though.

Rorachy:
You are saying this because you don't have a relative that is a sickler and the suffering they go through, if you do, you must check your genotype before you marry if you are an AS.

When the stress associated with dealing with sickler comes in, you will be frustrated and the love will fade.

I know few sicklers and most of them are dead, the pain the pass through is out of the world, money their parents waste is much and they die or suffer in pain.

I just feel pity when I meet one and I blame the parents for that cos they would have prevented that from happening to them.

Don't let mumu love blind you, love fades and marriage is for a life time.
The best thing you can do for your future children if you are an AS is to prevent them from being a sickler, cos you will regret it if you don't, don't be saying God will change your children genotype, heaven help those who help themselves.
Be wise.

like i said earlier, i am a lazy typer, just follow what you believe, i never checked my genotype, my father never did, and its really wotking for us, so if you believe that genotype or no genotype will stop your marriage, congrats.. tnx

vchykp:


like i said earlier, i am a lazy typer, just follow what you believe, i never checked my genotype, my father never did, and its really wotking for us, so if you believe that genotype or no genotype will stop your marriage, congrats.. tnx

It can't stop my marriage cos my blood group and genotype are on point, very perfect. I'm saying this in line with people that are AS, you might be AA and you won't know since you claim you never checked your genotype.

Then again, how can you lie that you have not checked your genotype when am quite sure gaining admission into a university, the must ask for your blood group and genotype.

Unless you have not attended a university, then you are bloody lying.

Rorachy:
It can't stop my marriage cos my blood group and genotype are on point, very perfect. I'm saying this in line with people that are AS, you might be AA and you won't know since you claim you never checked your genotype.

Then again, how can you lie that you have not checked your genotype when am quite sure gaining admission into a university, the must ask for your blood group and genotype.

Unless you have not attended a university, then you are bloody lying.

live with your believe, i graduated from ESUT 2010, i checked my genotype then and it was AS, when i wanted to settle down, i never went to any hospital to check hers, i never talked about it and she never asked, my 1st dota will be 5years by nov 2nd, and the second turned 3 on june 3rd.. i meant i hav never checked it for marriage purpose.. tnx

vchykp:


live with your believe, i graduated from ESUT 2010, i checked my genotype then and it was AS, when i wanted to settle down, i never went to any hospital to check hers, i never talked about it and she never asked, my 1st dota will be 5years by nov 2nd, and the second turned 3 on june 3rd.. i meant i hav never checked it for marriage purpose.. tnx

Then your wife is AA that is why she didn't bother to check.
As an AA, I won't bother to check my husband to be genotype cos am compatible with all the genotypes.

Rorachy:
Then your wife is AA that is why she didn't bother to check.

u heen.. you be journalist? she does not know mine, i dont know hers, we are divorced tho.. but my kids are still doing awesome, i am planning to re-settle soon, and genotype cant stop us..

vchykp:


u heen.. you be journalist? she does not know mine, i dont know hers, we are divorced tho.. but my kids are still doing awesome, i am planning to re-settle soon, and genotype cant stop us..

Sorry for my inquisitive nature, I just like to win an argument .

I didn't know you were divorced.

Rorachy:
Sorry for my inquisitive nature, I just like to win an argument .

I didn't know you were divorced.

its ok ma... i win u sha..

Rorachy:
Sorry for my inquisitive nature, I just like to win an argument .

I didn't know you were divorced.

its ok ma... i win u sha..