Mindfulness:


How about they do it (boys and girls) because nature calls them to do it?

I know some do because of nature. You know hormones and what not.

But many do it out of pressure.

cococandy:

I know some do because of nature. You know hormones and what not.

But many do it out of pressure.

That's where guidance is key.

Mindfulness:


Girls are not supposed to have any s.exual desires. And if it happens, it is the devil's work, it must be killed by fire by force.

See vex

The sarcasm got me laughing so hard I can't stop

cococandy:

by adult I mean over 20. My first time I was 21 and I think I was very mature for sex at that time.

Really? Only six summers ago? In 2011? The same year my sister broke my playstation 2? You should definitely write a monograph on the subject; my curiosity is most certainly piqued. I should like to read how it happened. Every single thing that transpired on that day, down to the minutest detail.

To do discretion no harm, you can always post under an anonymous sobriquet on either of these two websites (Just make sure to suffuse your story with perculiarities associated with yourself so I can easily discern your story from the rest of the pack). And if you're not motivated enough to drink pen and ink then narrate your experience to my two attentive ears and I shall readily be your loyal Boswell. Pleaseeeeee, CocoPops, do well to oblige me :

https://literotica.com/

http://www.deolububble.com/general/ndb/

Daeylar:

See vex
The sarcasm got me laughing so hard I can't stop

Oh come on, Daeylar, it wasn't even remotely funny. Why do you hyperbolize the humour? Ever since Lady Mindfulness of Winterfell sought to fashion herself after the teutonic mold of Angela Merkel of Westeros and became a mirthless ball-breaker, her facility with sarcasms and jokes took a fatal nose-dive and went terribly sere and yellow.

You made this comment only an hour and twenty-six minutes shy of your birthday, it's highly probable that you were only just caught up in the excitement of your ''big day", no wonder you were in such gay mood and found Mindfulness' wry remark to be such a rib-tickler. I bet in that elysian mood you would have seen a poxy, Dickesian street urchin and still considered him/her a sight for sore eyes. Your thoughts merely reflected how you felt, young Daeylar - classic case of "affect heuristic".

Happy birthday by the way. Although I fail to see the "happiness" in a day that serves to remind us of how close we're getting to our graves. I guess it's one of those un-contemplated paradoxes of life – we dread the spectre of death and yet, in an exuberant twist of Shakesperean irony, we label as "happy" a specific occassion each year which in truth is only a word-less reminder of how nigh we draw in our storm-tossed voyage to the chthonic abode of the Grim Reaper.

Once again, happy birthday.

Hehehe
I'm not a porn or romance writer

DarkRebel69:


Really? Only six summers ago? In 2011? The same year my sister broke my playstation 2? You should definitely write a monograph on the subject; my curiosity is most certainly piqued. I should like to read how it happened. Every single thing that transpired on that day, down to the minutest detail.

To do discretion no harm, you can always post under an anonymous sobriquet on either of these two websites (Just make sure to suffuse your story with perculiarities easily associated with you so I can easily discern your story from the rest of the pack). And if you're not motivated enough to drink pen and ink then narrate your experience to my two attentive ears and I shall readily be your loyal Boswell. Pleaseeeeee, CocoPops, do well to oblige me :

https://literotica.com/

http://www.deolububble.com/general/ndb/

I strongly believe that the sole cause of this decadence is religion. Early African villages have passage of rites for both male and female. where the male and female are taught the rudimentary aspects of life, both sexually, economically and otherwise.

It's was found in every village. but with the advent of religion, all those customs were relegated.

The Igbos had "Igba afo" for the male child, when he is about to reach the puberty age, he is taken along with his age mates to a secluded area for weeks, where they are taught all basic faucet of life, ranging from how to farm, how to hunt. how to take care of a family, sex education etc..

The girl child is also not exempted, at the start of puberty, they are also taken away and tutored on how to be a woman etc, though there were many wrong rites associated with such customs like female circumcison, but at the end of the day, I believe Africa could have taken up the good aspects of our customs and discarded those that had a dangerous after effects.

Seriously this would have stemmed the tide of decadence experienced now. If you check very well, most african Languages doesn't have name for "olosho", showing it was unheard of in those days for a woman to be wayward.

Mindfulness:


Girls are not supposed to have any s.exual desires. And if it happens, it is the devil's work, it must be killed by fire by force.

And after they get married, they must immediately turn into a por.nstar and have masterful knowledge of adventurous positions, both good and degrading. Whilst wearing a red bra and black pant. From Tia Mowry to Blac Chyna. Overnight!

DarkRebel69:


Oh come on, Daeylar, it wasn't even remotely funny. Why do you hyperbolize the humour? Ever since Lady Mindfulness of Winterfell sought to fashion herself after the teutonic mold of Angela Merkel of Westeros and became a mirthless ball-breaker, her facility with sarcasms and jokes took a fatal nose-dive and went terribly sere and yellow.

You made this comment only an hour and twenty-six minutes shy of your birthday, it's highly probable that you were only just caught up in the excitement of your ''big day", no wonder you were in such gay mood and found Mindfulness' wry remark to be such a rib-tickler. I bet in that elysian mood you would have seen a poxy, Dickesian street urchin and still considered him/her a sight for sore eyes. Your thoughts merely reflected how you felt, young Daeylar - classic case of "affect heuristic".

Happy birthday by the way. Although I fail to see the "happiness" in a day that serves to remind us of how close we're getting to our graves. I guess it's one of those un-contemplated paradoxes of life – we dread the spectre of death and yet, in an exuberant twist of Shakesperean irony, we label as "happy" a specific occassion each year which in truth is only a word-less reminder of how nigh we draw in our storm-tossed voyage to the chthonic abode of the Grim Reaper.

Once again, happy birthday.

Awwww
Thank you so much

Lol, you know it was funny

Lol, I am really happy today but yesterday most of the posters on this thread were making me laugh so much,
You included

Lol, this post was one of the posts that got me laughing

DarkRebel69:

When even a mention of the word "sex" in a typical Nigerian church stirs tension amongst the congregation, causing them to shift their buttocks on the pews in a fit of ''uncomfortability'' - as if to say the act of sex is not a natural phenomenon but some vile, alien, and physical manifestation of human degradation in the nth degree.

I wonder if this still applies as the reason I found your post funny, lol,

I bet in that elysian mood you would have seen a poxy, Dickesian street urchin and still considered him/her a sight for sore eyes. Your thoughts merely reflected how you felt, young Daeylar - classic case of "affect heuristic".

Lol, thanks
, this post made me laugh

DarkRebel69:


Men who castigate single women who do not draw the reins on their sexuality and yet get into marriage with a virgin while expecting her to be as sexually dexterous as a Cherokee d'ass would be, are like HRs who want to employ a 22-year old with 35 years of working experience. Outrightly ridiculous.

Virginity? Pfft! It's only shallow and simple-minded individuals who would use something as triffling as the state of a woman's hymen as an index of her personality. Why do you think such metric only has firm rooting in African soil? Africans are leagues behind the rest of the world, so it shouldn't come as surprise that while countries in enlightened continents are making scientific in-roads and inventing cutting-edge technology, Nigerians are in a little corner of the world, squeaking like a family of rats and debating effusively over the tensile strength of a woman's hymen. Talk about grand misplacement of priorities.

Take for instance these two women:

I.) Woman A was born with a very low libido and maintaining her virginity until marriage would require little effort from her

II.) Woman B's libido on the other hand is on over-drive and it would require more effort and self-discipline on her part if she intends to keep her hymen in pristine form.

If Woman B, in two or three instances of blind lust, has sex with two different men, would we then say that makes woman A the better of the two?

I can't predict the future, but I can predict what my future self would want, and that is: a woman who can stimulate me mentally in many-sided ways, a woman who is of quiet and studious habits, who is beautiful and generous in those areas of the female anatomy that my lustful eyes have always found most appealing; a woman who can offer me adequate emotional buffer in those trying times when my wits and nerves fail me; a woman who is caring, loving, and who is a repository of worldly knowledge, and on whose wisdom I can rely on to serve as salutary and edifying influence on my kids.

Virginity does not make a woman have all those qualities I've listed out, and since I'm not one to rank exterior trivialities over inner qualities, I unapologetically say: "To hell with virginity".

Seriously, we are yet to get it right in this part of the world where a well-behaved girl who lost her virginity unfortunately to a rapist would be made to feel guilty for the rest of her life simply because she didn't offer her hymen to her husband. Some would rather commit suicide than get married. It is well with us all

Onegai:


And after they get married, they must immediately turn into a por.nstar and have masterful knowledge of adventurous positions, both good and degrading. Whilst wearing a red bra and black pant. From Tia Mowry to Blac Chyna. Overnight!

Are there such things as "degrading sex positions or acts" between consenting couples?

DarkRebel69:


Are there such things as "degrading sex positions or acts" between consenting couples?

Good question

Onegai:


And after they get married, they must immediately turn into a por.nstar and have masterful knowledge of adventurous positions, both good and degrading. Whilst wearing a red bra and black pant. From Tia Mowry to Blac Chyna. Overnight!

Lol, I don't think tia mowry is as innocent as you make her out to be,
Neither she nor her sister, lol, I think the only thing they won't do that it's alleged that blac chyna did is 3somes

dangotesmummy:
yes this generation have seen and realised the lies,hypocrisy and old wives fables of African moms.they see that there's nothing to be chaste about after all he will still cheat

I was jisting with a friends younger sister some years back.she's married now though but before she married I said make sure you don't sleep with any man before marriage and she said abegii let me hear word,these men aren't worth keeping virginity for after all there's no guarantee in marriage.if I need sex I have a couple of fwb boyfriends I can call and I was really surprised

I saw some sense in what she said and all.fast forward to a month ago.I was in my make up artist studio,she was tying my gele for an owanmbe event and a phone call came into her phone,I was hearing a female voice crying and talking on phone saying "he has started again". So my mua asked what is it this time? She said since after a 3weeks wedding he hardly stays at home. He only comes home to pick his phone,read news paper, and go he doesn't sleep at home and when she asks where are you going and when are you coming back he ignores her.this was a man that met her as a virgin and disvirgined her then I now remember what my little friend told me that " aunty there's no guarantee in marriage" let me enjoy my life bow before marriage

And this is the same girl that I'm sure that her mom and aunties will have been feeding her with old wives fables that if you marry as a Virgin,your husband will respect you.now she has entered the marriage thinking what her mother said will happen,only to find out they're all fabricated fables just to deceive her to keep her Hymen.she has realised she has been played

The so called husband doesn't even send her talkless of respecting her and here he is frolicking with ladies that Aren't even virgins

Ladies have realised through exposure to the internet and personal experiences that all their mother's tales,advice and fear generation were all cork and bull

They say if you read your books you'll become successful, if you don't read your books you'll be working for those who read their books

Don't we have people who didn't read becoming millionaires and employing people who read their books to manage their companies and pay them their salaries?

Is neymar a graduate?
Is dangote a graduate?
Are some of these celebrities graduates? Don't they employ graduates?

Is dangote not employing graduates?

1. A lady that wants to screw will screw and find excuses for her randiness. Not judging, just an observation.

2. Education is still the best guarantee against poverty. Dangote, Neymar and others are outliers. No smart person will benchmark himself against them.
Dangote might be employing graduates , but many graduates are also employing people too. Medicine, law, pharmacy, lecturing, civil service, banking, accounting, management, computer science, research, diplomacy, journalism, many political positions, engineering and many other slots are closed to people without higher education.

IamaNigerianGuy:


1. A lady that wants to screw will screw and find excuses for her randiness. Not judging, just an observation.

2. Education is still the best guarantee against poverty. Dangote, Neymar and others are outliers. No smart person will benchmark himself against them.
Dangote might be employing graduates , but many graduates are also employing people too. Medicine, law, pharmacy, lecturing, civil service, banking, accounting, management, computer science, research, diplomacy, journalism, many political positions, engineering and many other slots are closed to people without higher education.

I agree with point number 2

For point number I think she was specifically speaking about those who were brought up to keep their virginity for a man, their husband especially with the notion that if the lady does so the man will never stray, I think that's what the lady was rebelling against, not anything else, but that's just what I understand, I may be wrong

I'm not in support of such, what I support is where the man or lady keeps his or her virginity because THEY want to and not because of anyone

Daeylar:


I agree with point number 2

For point number I think she was specifically speaking about those who were brought up to keep their virginity for a man, their husband especially with the notion that if the lady does so the man will never stray, I think that's what the lady was rebelling against, not anything else, but that's just what I understand, I may be wrong

I'm not in support of such, what I support is where the man or lady keeps his or her virginity because THEY want to and not because of anyone

In the era of our parents and their forbears, news traveled fast. Promiscuity was a one way ticket to a ruined reputation and life.
These days, maybe not so much but it is still a good idea for a lady to keep her pants on. No man likes to learn that his wife has been passed around.
But my other point is that, women should stop hiding behind men as the excuse for their actions. I know a girl who screwed her crush two nights before her wedding to another guy. Her excuse was that she was going into marriage and would never have the opportunity again - her husband would 'tie her down'. I call Bullshit on that. She was randy and wanted to get laid. She craved the thrill of illicit, taboo sex and the power of secrets. I get that; I understand her needs though I may not agree. If I have learned anything in my time on earth, it is that women want sex just as much as men. They just pretend about it.

Don't blame men for all your issues.

IamaNigerianGuy:


In the era of our parents and their forbears, news traveled fast. Promiscuity was a one way ticket to a ruined reputation and life.

I really don't understand how this conversation turned from how parents hurt rather than help the girl child by not giving them sex education to women blaming men for all their issues, I'm confused

These days, maybe not so much but it is still a good idea for a lady to keep her pants on. No man likes to learn that his wife has been passed around.

No lady likes to learn that her husband had been passed around so it's still a good idea for a man to keep his pants on, This part was missing from your post. Why do people use passed around though when referring to ladies? It's very insulting.

But my other point is that, women should stop hiding behind men as the excuse for their actions. I know a girl who screwed her crush two nights before her wedding to another guy. Her excuse was that she was going into marriage and would never have the opportunity again - her husband would 'tie her down'. Bullshit. She was randy and wanted to get laid. She craved the thrill of illicit, taboo sex and the power of secrets

You point should have been that people should take responsibility for their actions and not try to hide behind anyone, because the same exact scenario you posted has happened many times with a guy being the one sleeping around before his wedding, and I agree, the excuses are bullshit, so I don't really understand how this became a women vs men thing, or how women are blaming men for their actions.

It's a beautiful thread with over 70% beautiful responses
Why do you feel that women are blaming men for their actions?

Daeylar:


Good question

You're on Nairaland, so I'm guessing no birthday party?

Daeylar:

...
...
Why do you feel that women are blaming men for their actions?

In the initial shared post, the OP was going on about how women should walk the field as much as they liked because men would not appreciate their sacrifice. Wasn't that the gist of the message ? Well I say they should do as they like and leave men out of it .

IamaNigerianGuy:


In the initial shared post, the OP was going on about how women should walk the field as much as they liked because men would not appreciate their sacrifice. Wasn't that the gist of the message ? Well I say they should do as they like and leave men out of it .

nobody is blaming men here. The OP blamed mothers what dangotesmommy meant by her message is that virginity does not guarantee a happy marriage. do not turn this thread into what it is not.

IamaNigerianGuy:


In the initial shared post, the OP was going on about how women should walk the field as much as they liked because men would not appreciate their sacrifice. Wasn't that the gist of the message ? Well I say they should do as they like and leave men out of it .

U've just murdered the initial Post. It is nothing related to what you just discussed. D idea is: African Moms Are Excessive Disciplinarians And Should Soften Their Outputs. They Should Be More Attentive To Their Daughters And Shouldn't Shy Away From Discussing Sex With Them. They Should Learn That To Err Is Human And Learn To Forgive Their Daughters If Found To Have Screwed. They Should Also Learn That Falling In Love Is Beautiful And/Or Necessary. They Should Guide Their Daughters And Not Judge And Condemn Their Sexual Inclinations.

IamaNigerianGuy:


1. A lady that wants to screw will screw and find excuses for her randiness. Not judging, just an observation.

2. Education is still the best guarantee against poverty. Dangote, Neymar and others are outliers. No smart person will benchmark himself against them.
Dangote might be employing graduates , but many graduates are also employing people too. Medicine, law, pharmacy, lecturing, civil service, banking, accounting, management, computer science, research, diplomacy, journalism, many political positions, engineering and many other slots are closed to people without higher education.

*yawns*


What education does buhari, dino melaye,tinubu and the likes have?

A whole professor that is 10 times more educated than buhari is the deputy of buhari.tell me another story

cococandy:


by adult I mean over 20. My first time I was 21 and I think I was very mature for sex at that time.

However I'm going to be realistic and hope that she will listen until she's at least 19.
Most teenagers get pressured into sex way too early. The boys do it because they have to prove to their friends that they are men and the girls do it because they want to prove to their boyfriends that they love them.

Peer pressure is not to be undermined

very true though

EfemenaXY:


Allo! What's up aunty K? I heard you hollering my name

yes because I missed you and all your funny and insightful posts

dangotesmummy:
yes because I missed you and all your funny and insightful posts

Funny as i've been addressing you as a male and you didn't correct me

dangotesmummy:
*yawns*


What education does buhari, dino melaye,tinubu and the likes have?

A whole professor that is 10 times more educated than buhari is the deputy of buhari.tell me another story

Do you plan on pulling your kids out of school anytime soon ?

Onegai:


And after they get married, they must immediately turn into a por.nstar and have masterful knowledge of adventurous positions, both good and degrading. Whilst wearing a red bra and black pant. From Tia Mowry to Blac Chyna. Overnight!

DarkRebel69:


You're on Nairaland, so I'm guessing no birthday party?

Just responding to those who wished me a HBD

supersystemsng:


Funny as i've been addressing you as a male and you didn't correct me

I deliberately didn't because I understand you men's orientation. Once you realise I'm female you begin to address me patronizingly

dangotesmummy:
I deliberately didn't because I understand you men's orientation. Once you realise I'm female you begin to address me patronizingly

Well ma. I'm sorry i took you as a male... na wa, you have the wisdom of a man..i'm sure you're elderly..or advanced in experience, one of both...How's your holiday going?

Are you married with kids?

IamaNigerianGuy:


Do you plan on pulling your kids out of school anytime soon ?

focus on the issue and not my decision or children. My children have nothing to do with this matter. Don't deviate

supersystemsng:


Well ma. I'm sorry i took you as a male... na wa, you have the wisdom of a man..i'm sure you're elderly..or advanced in experience, one of both...How's your holiday going?

Are you married with kids?

I said it

Very typical, you didn't disappoint me?

So I must be elderly or married with kids for me to have "wisdom"

Anyway my holiday is good with a cold glass of double 3 and fried snail laced with diced pepper and onions, my day is excellent