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Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by kellycute(m): 5:59pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
slimtoney:the bolded part is way outta line. 1 Like |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by mizlovette(f): 6:10pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
Raskasal:my dear I'll tell you my own experience, before I married my hubby, during courtship I noticed he's the type that will yell at u once he's angry not minding if you guys are in d public or not, I saw d Rex flag but I felt I could change him in marriage, and guess what I couldn't . till date he would still do that only to come back begging, I have no choice now, as I have to tolerate it tho am not happy, what am saying in essence is you are lucky u noticed this now, make hay while d Sunshine's, as marriage is not courtship. During courtship u see d best, in marriage u see d rest. And if her best is not good now imagine what d rest would look like 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by wristbangle: 6:12pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
I patiently read your story OP and a lot run through my mind when reading it. As much as there is the other side of this story, I must say you need to be a man hence stop begging your girlfriend to apologise for her wrong doings. Your manner of gentility is making you a soft spot for her to build unnecessary ego. Take the bull by the horn by telling her to leave your apartment at the moment and act temporarily cold which may reset her stubborn brain. If this will resort to her leaving you, better! Don't rush into something you would rush out with huge regrets. You need to be a bit ruthless, more stubborn and tough on her. Be a man boss! 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by babylove2015: 6:27pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
Hmmm..... Op.... are u sure that girl luvs you?. Because I dont see how you will genuinely love some1 n hurt that same person and even shut that person out for days. I cant stand to keep malice with a regular person not to talk of someone that I really love. Well the choice is still yours to make. You can continue wt d r/ship n sacrifice ur happiness or you can put an end to the r/ship n av peace of mind (definately u will feel some pain... its jst for a while n then life goes on) . Remember that the lady's mom wont be there forever to continue to plead on her behalf. Think wisely. Dont let emotions overrule reason. 4 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by tosyne2much(m): 6:34pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
tolufase:You took the words out of my mouth |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by tosyne2much(m): 6:37pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
Benita27:You this girl ehn, your head correct wella ooo |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by reservd(m): 6:40pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
Make sure she leaves ur apartment with all her belongings and tell her not to return for d mean time. Bro jst walk away frm d relationship,my sincere opinion. 2 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by tosyne2much(m): 6:51pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
OP, I really took my time to read your story and a lot of things were running through my mind when reading it. If your girlfriend is stubborn, arrogant and disrespectful then you need to know how to handle her the right way. If you don’t deal with her the right way, then the attitude will only get worse over time. Her behavior when she was unapologetic or she called you all sorts of names was definitely something to be concerned about. It's a big red flag and it's something to be concerned about. In this situation, it’s always best to rip into your girlfriend and tell her that her behavior is completely disrespectful and unacceptable and that you may need to suspend the marriage plans for now. But words without action are meaningless, so a punishment reward system must be implemented to put her on track. Stubbornness and an abusive personality are two traits that will definitely destroy a relationship, so a reward/punish strategy needs to be implemented again in this circumstance 3 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by babylove2015: 7:06pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
tosyne2much: Lol... can you actually force a grown woman to change out of her will. Whatever happens to pretence.. lol. Any one can pretend to get whatever they want.... punishment or no punishment. If it is marrigae the gal wants she will comply and then revert back to what she has always been and then Mr op will continue to employ punishment tactics to call madam to order... but for how long?. Anyway thatz even if it changes anything sef. |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by tosyne2much(m): 7:15pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
babylove2015:Sighs! I'm just dumbfounded... So what do you think will be the way forward? |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Nobody: 7:23pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
tosyne2much: Word. This is raw fact Stubbornness and an abusive personality are two traits that will definitely destroy a relationship, so a reward/punish strategy needs to be implemented again in this circumstance 1 Like |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by babylove2015: 7:37pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
tosyne2much: Take the bull by its horns.... lets call black, black and blue, what it is. Situations like this should not be handled with a *converter* attitude. Many are biting their fingers for it. . Well, the op will do what he thinks is best for himself n i sincerely wish him the very best I knw of few peeps who married tough partners n they r managing the situation well. The question is can the op manage all of these including those that are still yet to be discovered for a long time?. 1 Like |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by tosyne2much(m): 7:58pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
babylove2015:Your very right ma... Just as mumsy always say you should never think you can completely change a woman in marriage. The highest she will do is to act like she has totally changed after which she will reveal her real character when you're married. Then you will continue to live the rest of your life in frustration |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Nobody: 9:12pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
tosyne2much:Na true I talk na. The guy is at the girl's mercies, too bad. |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Raskasal(m): 9:36pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
peepydelano: LOL. Amble indeed |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by midehill(m): 9:43pm On Oct 18, 2017 |
[size=8pt][/size] My brother run ooo....run from dah marriage |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Raskasal(m): 1:23pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
I thank you all for all responses and comments. I have been in relationships which ended for one reason or the other. But I don't want it to look as if am the problem to my self, especially to people watching from afar, which was what got me patient enough to endure her all the while hoping she will amend her ways. I'm a soft hearted guy and it think it's been taken for granted by a lady who initially appears to be best in the world. But with all your comments, advice and suggestions I think I know the way forward. Thank you all. It's nice to have you all matured minds in the house. I appreciate everyone's comment. It's lifted me and now I can forge ahead. Thanks all 1 Like |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Nobody: 4:17pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
She has too much pride in her, and pride goes before a fall, break up with her, stop begging her to talk to you or call you, that is the mistakes we do, begging a partner to talk to us, it only make them worse, if she refuses to talk to you, leave her alone, there are many fishes in the ocean.. Finally, don't marry her. 3 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Shawnnn01: 5:10pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
Gentlevin: Had similar issue as the OP with with my ex. She got a job on the Island n then the troubled started. I wasn't fazed though I understood the rich guys on the Island would woo her & that is bound to affect us. She demanded I rent an apartment for her in VI. I mean what is the rationale of renting a million naira apartment for just you when I live alone in a three bed in Ajah. Before i can decide I realise coming around turn a difficult task for her. This hardened my resolve n that was how everything collapsed. Now she's back acting nice but I ain't got time for errors planning my wedding with another clean sweet babe she as no idea of. Raskasal:Listen OP, girls will always act the way your girl is doing if they believe they have a chance to met someone beta. Beta could be anything, any girl not willing or haven't learnt to believe you are her all in all should not be considered a life partner. It's a learning process and girls find it very difficult to comprehend. Only the few that understand this get married early, what they now do once married is a topic for another day. 2 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Angy55(f): 5:42pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
Gentlevin:Heya!! Chai, so, another girl would suffer because of the sin of one person. |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Raskasal(m): 6:13pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
Shawnnn01: You understand what I am facing. That's just how she behaves. I have called her one day and say it to her face that shes acting to me because she feels she has the opportunity to meet another man now that she works on island, but refutes and said it's not what I think. |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by KevinDein: 6:17pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
Lol Never knew that this sort of girls are that many. What will surprise you all is that they genuinely don't believe they are doing something wrong by not communicating or not saying I'm sorry. So you see, that's the bigger issue here. They don't think they are doing anything wrong. 1 Like |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Fidecoo(m): 6:36pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
Raskasal:,oga you are over pampering her. Period |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Raskasal(m): 10:15pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
KevinDein: Are you serious? Have you encountered such? How did you deal with it? |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Gentlevin: 11:07pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
KevinDein:Most of them feel that since they are beautiful , have both front and back features that d guy should always go on their knees for them. But they forget that there is a limit to nonsense and not all men possess a woman's heart....and when u finally summon d courage to dump her, she gets surprised and her eyes opens and realise it's late for her to come back.... 2 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by placeofallure(f): 11:24pm On Oct 19, 2017 |
Some unfortunate things happen but they're categorised as a blessing in disguise. It is a good thing she's showing her real self when you can still make a U-turn. Let her off the hook please. However before you set her free give her a last chance, tell her how she's killing the relationship and how uncomfortable you are becoming. If she still doesn't change, show her the door. I once had to live with my boyfriend then, now my husband for a few months. We saw ourselves in a new light. In fact those few months helped me to decide to be with him forever. Your case shouldn't be different Don't settle for less. 2 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Raskasal(m): 5:39am On Oct 20, 2017 |
placeofallure: Thank you dear Sister. Appreciate your comments. May you have an everlasting happy home. 3 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by sacramento1212: 7:04am On Oct 20, 2017 |
Raskasal: I face similar issue with addition of mine disrespecting me and has a bad character. That's a red flag and if you are not careful will ruin you in marriage. Will the mum always intercede even in marriage? What happens if she's no more on earth? Do not display importance to this lady, act as a man for once and if she wants to go, let her go. I will advise you suspend everything that has to do with marriage with her, discuss finally your concerns and if you do not see any change in her, tell her bye. You definitely would see a better woman out there because there's a man for every woman and vice versa. BUT IF YOU DO NOT SEE AN ISSUE BEING THE WOMAN IN YOUR MATRIMONIAL HOME, then go ahead with the marriage by ignoring the early signs. 2 Likes |
Re: Help On How To Handle A Stubborn Fiancé by Kobicove(m): 8:38am On Oct 20, 2017 |
My friend what you're seeing now is just 10%...wait until after the marriage if you're foolish enough to marry her then you will see the remaining 90% Just don't come here to wail. It beats my imagination why people will see red flags during courtship and still go ahead with marriage and expect a fully grown adult who is set in his/her ways to just suddenly change! 2 Likes |
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