Votukpa:


bro,

Welcome to the red pill.
Your life will never be the same again, for the better.

Now stop whining like a lil biitch and listen.

All the guys out here consoling you over your so called loss are really not helping you. This is because no one told you the truth: your parents lied to you, society lied to you; Hollywood, Nollywood and Bollywood lied to you; and worst of all, bitchees lied to you. There's no happy ending, women don't care about love and romance at the end, they only want u to be that way so that relinquishing your resources and freedom for their comfort and security will be easier for you to accept and bear. Your so called girl knows that she's hit the wall already and u would not like her old ass when u hit your fortunes.

Meditate on this shiit.

By all means, marriage is a good thing and should benefit both parties at the end. However, this is 2017 and ladies are not willing to put in the work, that's why they tend to rush niggas into marriage, which is their goal. Can't you see you and the girl have different visions. You want to be happy and she wants marriage. Two different things.

Let me ask you...

What does she have to offer?? You actually don't NEED her. Think about this.

She's already hit the wall
She has no skills, no job, nothing to contribute to your life as a helper, (seeing that her freshmess is fading) yet she wants you to be financially ready to bear with her. Why didn't she say this when she was much younger?? You know why? she wanted to eat her cake and have it. She wanted a young man with prospects and not some older dude with money who wouldn't be able to thrill her sexually. She banked on u bro, and seeing that things didn't turn out the way she wanted, she wants out.

Bleep family pressure, that biitch knows what she wants. Believe me nicca. She wants security, and the social proof that she's a married woman...with a man who can care for her.

There are many thing people don't tell men in our Nigerian society. If men knew these things, they would NEVER marry the way they currently do.

They don't want men to know that men have all the bargaining chips in the marriage deal. Yes, marriage is a deal and not a love thing. Love comes years AFTER marriage, not before. Selah.

Let me explain.

Men increase in value (in the eyes of women) over time while women decrease in value (in the eyes of men) over time Women know this and don't want u to be aware of it. If you become self aware, you will avoid women until you realize your value. Note that it takes time and investment to be valuable. Women want marriage with a valuable man but they don't care that marriage to a man who isn't realized yet, makes the realization for him HARDER. This is what happens generally and there are exceptions.

Men don't age as badly as women. We actually become more good looking as we mature We will attract younger and hotter women at out prime. Which married woman wants this?? None. They don't want you to know earlier in life that if u take ur time and build yourself, you can have your pick of ladies. Check out our Igbo bros, they understand this game. Some ugly ass nigga who can't construct a comprehensible sentence to save his life with a hot ass, slim waisted, round ass ass, young ass wife who worships him.

Meditate on this shiit.

Men are being socialized to pedestalise pusssy. You were made to believe that without pusssy, you are not a man. Women generally overestimate their sexual value, Lol. Something that depreciates like a falling stock price. Women THROW pusssy men!! At valuable attractive men who DON'T need pussy.

Meditate.

Family and children they say. Lineage continuation they cry.

Listen nigga!

When you die, none of this matters. God will not ask u if u got married or how many kids u had He will ask you to give account of all your Bleep ups. He will ask you if u did his will. He will ask u if u obeyed him. Jesus, your example didn't marry nor have kids, but he is the FIRST of the FIRSTS. My point is, use your super computer of a brain and think critically. If you must have a family and kids, start early. But u don't have that luxury as we speak. Our folks didn't tell us. You now have some 35 year old starting off. Wtf. In 2017, if you are 30 and above and u don't have your shit together yet and u want to marry, YOU WILL SUFFER needlessly.

Meditate on this shiit.

There's more but I will spare you because I know you get the picture. Bottom line, become VALUABLE, be self aware son, have some knowledge of your self worth and BUILD it. Stop being a romantic in love, destroy your delusions about heterosexual dynamics Romance and love fade away at the end, only your works will speak for you. God will judge you according to your works and love is work not a feeling.

You life is NOT useless without her. You need to build and invest in yourself. Get some skills, learn stuff, read a lot and travel.

And...

Meditate on this shiit.

Airforce1:
Too long ...

ArchangeLucifer:
Mankind has always baffled me with its obsession over the union of a man and a woman despite how I shamefully exposed this at the very first attempt by the Almighty.

The female is a liability to the male. Without her, he can rise to the highest points and even challenge me.

But I don't give a Bleep, who needs competition anyway.

Y'all can keep letting yourselves down.

Been there, done that.

truthsayer009:
Men increase in value (in the eyes of women) over time while women decrease in value (in the eyes of men) over time.

Yes, marriage is a deal and not a love thing (Partially true).....Read On, If you can. You won't regret !

GasAndOilTheory:
THIS IS THE REALEST THING I HAVE EVER READ ON NAIRALAND since 2012 that i became a member. i clocked 27 early june this year... and i dont seem to understand

RaggedyAnn:


You provoked me into writing this sketchy parody. So, thanks. No disrespect to the male folk.

1.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime.

Manwan: (pinches his nose) Mantu, you stink!

Mantu: Oh, I haven't been by the river in weeks, so I haven't bathed. And you, you're skinnier than the last time I saw you.

Manwan: Yes, I caught some fish but when I put them over the fire, something must have happened because I couldn't get them past my throat.

Mantu: Life is hard!

Manwan: You can say that again.

Mantu: Life is hard!!

Manwan: No, I heard you the first time. I meant: I agree with you.

Mantu: Okay. (Pensive) But, you know, the other half of mankind is not suffering like this o.

Manwan: Really? How do you mean?

Mantu: I have been seeing womanwan and co, they smell like roses all the time, their houses are clean and their pots ooze with delicious fragrances.

Manwan: But that's unfair!

Mantu: You can say that again.

Manwan: See?

Mantu: Yes. I learn quickly. It is really unfair. What do we do about it?

Manwan: They have to help us o!

Mantu: But how do we get them to do that? We are stronger, can we just capture them and put them in cages, and release them only to work for us?

Manwan: No. That won't work. They would not be happy to work for us that way. They could even poison us!

Mantu: You are right. (Pensive)

Manwan: We have to make it seem like it is their idea to work for us.

Mantu: Okay.

Manwan: Or.......we make them believe they have no choice.

Mantu: But isn't that like putting them in cages?

Manwan: No. (Beams brilliantly) we give them a set of instructions but we won't say that the instructions are coming from us.

Mantu: then whom will we say that they come from?

Manwan: God.

Mantu: God? Who is that?

Manwan: No one. But are they to know that? We will say that he is an invisible being larger than life, who has the power to punish them if they fail to follow his instructions. That his reach is beyond death. That he rewards good people and burns bad people in a big fire for ever.

Mantu: (shivers) that is genius! But how do we explain that God only punishes them and not us?

Manwan: We won't. Because he will punish us too.

Mantu: (looks aghast)

Manwan: Relax! We will make our rules different from theirs. We will say that we are the first and dearer creations of God, created to serve him while they are meant to serve us.

Mantu: Manwan, you are brilliant.


2.

A garden of roses, someplace close by somewhere sometime.

Manwan: God has revealed his face to me. And he says that you have shamed him with your despicable acts.

Womanwan: What despicable acts? We do not disturb anyone. We plant on our fields and hunt in our forests. We never cross the Great Divide, into your country only at the night of the harvest moon that marks our bi-annual mating ritual.

Manwan: Yes. It is not acceptable for you to plant or hunt anymore.

Womantu: Ha! How do we survive?

Manwan: each one of you will be joined to one of us. We will plant and hunt and you will keep us tidy, and feed us with your food.

Womanwan: but what do we gain from this union? We already do our own planting and hunting.

Manwan: Yes. And God is enraged by your impudence. You will burn in flames forever even after you die. Is that what you want?

Womanwan: No. Of course not.


3.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime

Mantu: that was easy.

Manwan: Yes, it was. See how fresh we look now!

Mantu: I noticed that there are more of them than of us. What happens if the unpaired ones begin to live well independently? Will that not make more of them want to remain that way?

Manwan: We will tell them that an unpaired breed is a shameful being. We can, in our benevolence, then offer to join ourselves with two, three, four... Of them.

Mantu: (excited) more of them to cook and clean and treat me like a king? Manwan, you have a delicious brain!

Manwan: I know. Have you also noticed how ugly they become in old age? Those succulent fruit in their chest begin to droop and loose their shape. Their skins begin to dry out and curl up. We must let them know how unattractive we find them in their old age so that they are desperate to be joined in their youth.

Mantu: But we also wrinkle and become droopy.

Manwan: Yes, but is God complaining? He doesn't care that we are old and ugly when we pass the gates of heaven. Remember we are made for God and they are made for us. They must please us! They cannot be allowed to have protruding bellies, or extra flab. We will tell them that we are moved by our eyes. If we do not consider them pleasing to look at, they would not be considered worthy of being joined to us.

ScotFree:


Copy and Paste

RaggedyAnn:



I just wrote that now. It's what I do. I should have stated: All rights reserved, but it's more or less a comment to the original post. When you claim something is copied, make sure you can at least point to a different source.

RaggedyAnn:


You provoked me into writing this sketchy parody. So, thanks. No disrespect to the male folk.

1.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime.

Manwan: (pinches his nose) Mantu, you stink!

Mantu: Oh, I haven't been by the river in weeks, so I haven't bathed. And you, you're skinnier than the last time I saw you.

Manwan: Yes, I caught some fish but when I put them over the fire, something must have happened because I couldn't get them past my throat.

Mantu: Life is hard!

Manwan: You can say that again.

Mantu: Life is hard!!

Manwan: No, I heard you the first time. I meant: I agree with you.

Mantu: Okay. (Pensive) But, you know, the other half of mankind is not suffering like this o.

Manwan: Really? How do you mean?

Mantu: I have been seeing womanwan and co, they smell like roses all the time, their houses are clean and their pots ooze with delicious fragrances.

Manwan: But that's unfair!

Mantu: You can say that again.

Manwan: See?

Mantu: Yes. I learn quickly. It is really unfair. What do we do about it?

Manwan: They have to help us o!

Mantu: But how do we get them to do that? We are stronger, can we just capture them and put them in cages, and release them only to work for us?

Manwan: No. That won't work. They would not be happy to work for us that way. They could even poison us!

Mantu: You are right. (Pensive)

Manwan: We have to make it seem like it is their idea to work for us.

Mantu: Okay.

Manwan: Or.......we make them believe they have no choice.

Mantu: But isn't that like putting them in cages?

Manwan: No. (Beams brilliantly) we give them a set of instructions but we won't say that the instructions are coming from us.

Mantu: then whom will we say that they come from?

Manwan: God.

Mantu: God? Who is that?

Manwan: No one. But are they to know that? We will say that he is an invisible being larger than life, who has the power to punish them if they fail to follow his instructions. That his reach is beyond death. That he rewards good people and burns bad people in a big fire for ever.

Mantu: (shivers) that is genius! But how do we explain that God only punishes them and not us?

Manwan: We won't. Because he will punish us too.

Mantu: (looks aghast)

Manwan: Relax! We will make our rules different from theirs. We will say that we are the first and dearer creations of God, created to serve him while they are meant to serve us.

Mantu: Manwan, you are brilliant.


2.

A garden of roses, someplace close by somewhere sometime.

Manwan: God has revealed his face to me. And he says that you have shamed him with your despicable acts.

Womanwan: What despicable acts? We do not disturb anyone. We plant on our fields and hunt in our forests. We never cross the Great Divide, into your country only at the night of the harvest moon that marks our bi-annual mating ritual.

Manwan: Yes. It is not acceptable for you to plant or hunt anymore.

Womantu: Ha! How do we survive?

Manwan: each one of you will be joined to one of us. We will plant and hunt and you will keep us tidy, and feed us with your food.

Womanwan: but what do we gain from this union? We already do our own planting and hunting.

Manwan: Yes. And God is enraged by your impudence. You will burn in flames forever even after you die. Is that what you want?

Womanwan: No. Of course not.


3.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime

Mantu: that was easy.

Manwan: Yes, it was. See how fresh we look now!

Mantu: I noticed that there are more of them than of us. What happens if the unpaired ones begin to live well independently? Will that not make more of them want to remain that way?

Manwan: We will tell them that an unpaired breed is a shameful being. We can, in our benevolence, then offer to join ourselves with two, three, four... Of them.

Mantu: (excited) more of them to cook and clean and treat me like a king? Manwan, you have a delicious brain!

Manwan: I know. Have you also noticed how ugly they become in old age? Those succulent fruit in their chest begin to droop and loose their shape. Their skins begin to dry out and curl up. We must let them know how unattractive we find them in their old age so that they are desperate to be joined in their youth.

Mantu: But we also wrinkle and become droopy.

Manwan: Yes, but is God complaining? He doesn't care that we are old and ugly when we pass the gates of heaven. Remember we are made for God and they are made for us. They must please us! They cannot be allowed to have protruding bellies, or extra flab. We will tell them that we are moved by our eyes. If we do not consider them pleasing to look at, they would not be considered worthy of being joined to us.

RaggedyAnn:


You provoked me into writing this sketchy parody. So, thanks. No disrespect to the male folk.

1.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime.

Manwan: (pinches his nose) Mantu, you stink!

Mantu: Oh, I haven't been by the river in weeks, so I haven't bathed. And you, you're skinnier than the last time I saw you.

Manwan: Yes, I caught some fish but when I put them over the fire, something must have happened because I couldn't get them past my throat.

Mantu: Life is hard!

Manwan: You can say that again.

Mantu: Life is hard!!

Manwan: No, I heard you the first time. I meant: I agree with you.

Mantu: Okay. (Pensive) But, you know, the other half of mankind is not suffering like this o.

Manwan: Really? How do you mean?

Mantu: I have been seeing womanwan and co, they smell like roses all the time, their houses are clean and their pots ooze with delicious fragrances.

Manwan: But that's unfair!

Mantu: You can say that again.

Manwan: See?

Mantu: Yes. I learn quickly. It is really unfair. What do we do about it?

Manwan: They have to help us o!

Mantu: But how do we get them to do that? We are stronger, can we just capture them and put them in cages, and release them only to work for us?

Manwan: No. That won't work. They would not be happy to work for us that way. They could even poison us!

Mantu: You are right. (Pensive)

Manwan: We have to make it seem like it is their idea to work for us.

Mantu: Okay.

Manwan: Or.......we make them believe they have no choice.

Mantu: But isn't that like putting them in cages?

Manwan: No. (Beams brilliantly) we give them a set of instructions but we won't say that the instructions are coming from us.

Mantu: then whom will we say that they come from?

Manwan: God.

Mantu: God? Who is that?

Manwan: No one. But are they to know that? We will say that he is an invisible being larger than life, who has the power to punish them if they fail to follow his instructions. That his reach is beyond death. That he rewards good people and burns bad people in a big fire for ever.

Mantu: (shivers) that is genius! But how do we explain that God only punishes them and not us?

Manwan: We won't. Because he will punish us too.

Mantu: (looks aghast)

Manwan: Relax! We will make our rules different from theirs. We will say that we are the first and dearer creations of God, created to serve him while they are meant to serve us.

Mantu: Manwan, you are brilliant.


2.

A garden of roses, someplace close by somewhere sometime.

Manwan: God has revealed his face to me. And he says that you have shamed him with your despicable acts.

Womanwan: What despicable acts? We do not disturb anyone. We plant on our fields and hunt in our forests. We never cross the Great Divide, into your country only at the night of the harvest moon that marks our bi-annual mating ritual.

Manwan: Yes. It is not acceptable for you to plant or hunt anymore.

Womantu: Ha! How do we survive?

Manwan: each one of you will be joined to one of us. We will plant and hunt and you will keep us tidy, and feed us with your food.

Womanwan: but what do we gain from this union? We already do our own planting and hunting.

Manwan: Yes. And God is enraged by your impudence. You will burn in flames forever even after you die. Is that what you want?

Womanwan: No. Of course not.


3.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime

Mantu: that was easy.

Manwan: Yes, it was. See how fresh we look now!

Mantu: I noticed that there are more of them than of us. What happens if the unpaired ones begin to live well independently? Will that not make more of them want to remain that way?

Manwan: We will tell them that an unpaired breed is a shameful being. We can, in our benevolence, then offer to join ourselves with two, three, four... Of them.

Mantu: (excited) more of them to cook and clean and treat me like a king? Manwan, you have a delicious brain!

Manwan: I know. Have you also noticed how ugly they become in old age? Those succulent fruit in their chest begin to droop and loose their shape. Their skins begin to dry out and curl up. We must let them know how unattractive we find them in their old age so that they are desperate to be joined in their youth.

Mantu: But we also wrinkle and become droopy.

Manwan: Yes, but is God complaining? He doesn't care that we are old and ugly when we pass the gates of heaven. Remember we are made for God and they are made for us. They must please us! They cannot be allowed to have protruding bellies, or extra flab. We will tell them that we are moved by our eyes. If we do not consider them pleasing to look at, they would not be considered worthy of being joined to us.







I am not in anyway in support of what the Op wrote neither am I supporting yours but damn u really got me thinking, u ar

Ozavize88:


I am not in anyway in support of what the Op wrote neither am I in support of yours but damn u really got me thinking, u ar good.

NLmember:
Good job Raggedyann.

I wonder why many men think a life of subjugation and bondage is something all women are desperate to enter.

Goddys:
This is the wisest thing I have ever read on this forum. Of late, I have been in deep thought the essence of putting myself including my peace of mind in perpetual bondage with these creatures

ArchangeLucifer:
Mankind has always baffled me with its obsession over the union of a man and a woman despite how I shamefully exposed this at the very first attempt by the Almighty.

The female is a liability to the male. Without her, he can rise to the highest points and even challenge me.

But I don't give a Bleep, who needs competition anyway.

Y'all can keep letting yourselves down.

Been there, done that.

alexis007:
I know that code too....That code of men who feast with gods...

In due time, I would start my campaign of conquest. I should defeat you if you stand in my way.

But for you to know this code, you're really wise. Thumbs up man.

ArchangeLucifer:



Gods are beneath me.

Gods derive their potency from me.

You are an ignorant mortal.

ArchangeLucifer:



Gods are beneath me.

Gods derive their potency from me.

You are an ignorant mortal.

Finstar:


Lucy, why have you come to dwell among us mortals? Ohhh.. I remember, you were terribly dealt with and hurdled down to be a flaw to our dear earth by Michael, my friend. You dispise mortals, cause you know that at our core, we're more than this mere water spacesuit we wear. Your mistake was convincing Eve to take the fruit, that fruit of knowledge is the only weapon we have against you. When man rise in knowledge, he comes to the enlightenment that the devil we fear is not the hideous monster with two horns.. When enlightenment is reach, that is when we discover that we are our own devil. Yes! There's no evil entity plotting against us, we are actually the creator of evil and good. We are the creator of positive and negative.. Through our mind, we create and manifest. Sadly, we dwell on the negative and end up attracting negativities.. At the end, we blame the devil that doesn't exist..

Lucy, you don't exist.. You're an illusion.

truthsayer009:


It's not for everyone Bro !!! If I shorten it, It will loose its value from the Original Poster !

RaggedyAnn:


You provoked me into writing this sketchy parody. So, thanks. No disrespect to the male folk.

1.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime.

Manwan: (pinches his nose) Mantu, you stink!

Mantu: Oh, I haven't been by the river in weeks, so I haven't bathed. And you, you're skinnier than the last time I saw you.

Manwan: Yes, I caught some fish but when I put them over the fire, something must have happened because I couldn't get them past my throat.

Mantu: Life is hard!

Manwan: You can say that again.

Mantu: Life is hard!!

Manwan: No, I heard you the first time. I meant: I agree with you.

Mantu: Okay. (Pensive) But, you know, the other half of mankind is not suffering like this o.

Manwan: Really? How do you mean?

Mantu: I have been seeing womanwan and co, they smell like roses all the time, their houses are clean and their pots ooze with delicious fragrances.

Manwan: But that's unfair!

Mantu: You can say that again.

Manwan: See?

Mantu: Yes. I learn quickly. It is really unfair. What do we do about it?

Manwan: They have to help us o!

Mantu: But how do we get them to do that? We are stronger, can we just capture them and put them in cages, and release them only to work for us?

Manwan: No. That won't work. They would not be happy to work for us that way. They could even poison us!

Mantu: You are right. (Pensive)

Manwan: We have to make it seem like it is their idea to work for us.

Mantu: Okay.

Manwan: Or.......we make them believe they have no choice.

Mantu: But isn't that like putting them in cages?

Manwan: No. (Beams brilliantly) we give them a set of instructions but we won't say that the instructions are coming from us.

Mantu: then whom will we say that they come from?

Manwan: God.

Mantu: God? Who is that?

Manwan: No one. But are they to know that? We will say that he is an invisible being larger than life, who has the power to punish them if they fail to follow his instructions. That his reach is beyond death. That he rewards good people and burns bad people in a big fire for ever.

Mantu: (shivers) that is genius! But how do we explain that God only punishes them and not us?

Manwan: We won't. Because he will punish us too.

Mantu: (looks aghast)

Manwan: Relax! We will make our rules different from theirs. We will say that we are the first and dearer creations of God, created to serve him while they are meant to serve us.

Mantu: Manwan, you are brilliant.


2.

A garden of roses, someplace close by somewhere sometime.

Manwan: God has revealed his face to me. And he says that you have shamed him with your despicable acts.

Womanwan: What despicable acts? We do not disturb anyone. We plant on our fields and hunt in our forests. We never cross the Great Divide, into your country only at the night of the harvest moon that marks our bi-annual mating ritual.

Manwan: Yes. It is not acceptable for you to plant or hunt anymore.

Womantu: Ha! How do we survive?

Manwan: each one of you will be joined to one of us. We will plant and hunt and you will keep us tidy, and feed us with your food.

Womanwan: but what do we gain from this union? We already do our own planting and hunting.

Manwan: Yes. And God is enraged by your impudence. You will burn in flames forever even after you die. Is that what you want?

Womanwan: No. Of course not.


3.

In a filthy hole somewhere sometime

Mantu: that was easy.

Manwan: Yes, it was. See how fresh we look now!

Mantu: I noticed that there are more of them than of us. What happens if the unpaired ones begin to live well independently? Will that not make more of them want to remain that way?

Manwan: We will tell them that an unpaired breed is a shameful being. We can, in our benevolence, then offer to join ourselves with two, three, four... Of them.

Mantu: (excited) more of them to cook and clean and treat me like a king? Manwan, you have a delicious brain!

Manwan: I know. Have you also noticed how ugly they become in old age? Those succulent fruit in their chest begin to droop and loose their shape. Their skins begin to dry out and curl up. We must let them know how unattractive we find them in their old age so that they are desperate to be joined in their youth.

Mantu: But we also wrinkle and become droopy.

Manwan: Yes, but is God complaining? He doesn't care that we are old and ugly when we pass the gates of heaven. Remember we are made for God and they are made for us. They must please us! They cannot be allowed to have protruding bellies, or extra flab. We will tell them that we are moved by our eyes. If we do not consider them pleasing to look at, they would not be considered worthy of being joined to us.

Finstar:


Lucy, why have you come to dwell among us mortals? Ohhh.. I remember, you were terribly dealt with and hurdled down to be a flaw to our dear earth by Michael, my friend. You dispise mortals, cause you know that at our core, we're more than this mere water spacesuit we wear. Your mistake was convincing Eve to take the fruit, that fruit of knowledge is the only weapon we have against you. When man rise in knowledge, he comes to the enlightenment that the devil we fear is not the hideous monster with two horns.. When enlightenment is reach, that is when we discover that we are our own devil. Yes! There's no evil entity plotting against us, we are actually the creator of evil and good. We are the creator of positive and negative.. Through our mind, we create and manifest. Sadly, we dwell on the negative and end up attracting negativities.. At the end, we blame the devil that doesn't exist..

Lucy, you don't exist.. You're an illusion.

Blackhawk01:




They scammed us, these evil people scammed us! Damn!

Well, this is the 21st century, only those that want to be scammed will get scammed. Moi? #TeamBabyMama

Makydebbie, you need to read this, have always known marriage is just some kinda decorative bondage.

RaggedyAnn:



Thank you. lol, yes, it's supposed to be a funny exaggeration.