Benita27:
I said I wasn't going to argue with you again 'cause you're not just unintelligent but lack a knowledge of how patriarchal the Nigerian society is. @embolden, coming from someone that has spent 4months on NL?.

laudate:

Madam, not all Nigerian cultures are patriarchal.

SlimBrawnie:
My mum is Edo, married to an Igbo man and she did not do all these drama you are stating here... Is this how you go about monitoring people's wedding?


Ye Monitoring Spirit ........Gerrrrout!

Modified:

Errm for those asking, I attended my parents traditional in 2005 because they only did their white wedding in the 80s, due to her family disapproval(she comes from a Muslim home).

Their wedding anniversary is 2nd Dec. You are invited

midehi2:

what are you saying sef, is her mother the head of the family? hian!

Benita27:
Quote one you know that marital rites where done based on the mother's tradition?. Should a Nigerian be debating this? Was the mother not married off to a man?.

cyndy1000:
Able Observing officer, the wedding has come to an end and was a success so no need drink paracetamol for their headache, besides not all those traditions are been observed. When you do you own wedding you do all the tradition as you want.

laudate:

Madam, now you are being rude. Not all African societies or cultures are patriarchal. Among the Nembe people for example, the culture is matrilineal.

Benita27:
Quote one you know that marital rites where done based on the mother's tradition?. Should a Nigerian be debating this? Was the mother not married off to a man?.

Benita27:
SMH, what part of this post did you spot rudeness?. Back to Nembe tradition. That's Bayelsa and they share same tradition as parts of Rivers State which is where I'm from. Could you please enlighten me on Nembe tradition?.

Benita27:
Quote one you know that marital rites where done based on the mother's tradition?. Should a Nigerian be debating this? Was the mother not married off to a man?.

cyndy1000:
Able Observing officer, the wedding has come to an end and was a success so no need drink paracetamol for their headache, besides not all those traditions are been observed. When you do you own wedding you do all the tradition as you want.

laudate:

Madam, please do your research by talking to Nembe elders. It is good that you are close to them. Ask them about matrilineal succession rights and customs.
And the rudeness was in the way you queried if I was a Nigerian?

Benita27:
Hahaha. Clearly you're confused. Sorry, to say.

Bayelsa State is a product of Rivers State so when it comes to marital rites, they share same. Nembe tradition isn't matrilineal but still patriarchal. The matrilineal succession rites and customs has to do with giving the bride's mother what's due her before the girl is married off. It's normal tradition in most part of the country 'cause they have a separate list for the mother and a certain amount is paid to her aside bride price which her father take on. You need research the most.

laudate:

No madam, you are the one that needs to do more research. Please go and talk to Nembe elders. Don't make assumptions here. It goes beyond giving gifts to the bride's mother. Remember, I also mentioned matrilineal succession and customs. If a society is patrilineal, wouldn't inheritance customs be based on the father's lineage? Why then does the mother's lineage feature so strongly in Nembe culture?

Benita27:
Go tell that to an alien. Does a Nembe woman assumes her father's name after marriage or her husband's name, and in whose compound is a Nembe woman buried?. You've not mentioned how the mother's lineage features strongly in their tradition so I'll say you don't know what you're saying. Bye!.

NoToPile:
People must talk sha.

Where I come from its not compulsory to go to your fathers compound in the village to pay dowry, you can have your trad at whatever location your parents are you can even use a rented hall away from whereever your parents are as long as parents of the bride agree with the location. ( weddings are planned and hosted by the brides family in youruba land). Its not a communal thing unlike some traditions.
The koko is the thing must be paid.


Besides who knows whether they have settled the brides (adesuwa) parents in their parlor and now they are just doing feferity. I have seen this happen before, pay the bride price in the parlor and then throw a big party for the same trad marriage( we have too much wahala for partying in this country sef)

Kendroid:

Still doesn't prove the mum was telling the truth

SlimBrawnie:
My mum is Edo, married to an Igbo man and she did not do all these drama you are stating here... Is this how you go about monitoring people's wedding?


Ye Monitoring Spirit ........Gerrrrout!

Modified:

Errm for those asking, I attended my parents traditional in 2005 because they only did their white wedding in the 80s, due to her family disapproval(she comes from a Muslim home).

Their wedding anniversary is 2nd Dec. You are invited

laudate:

No madam, you are the one that needs to do more research. Please go and talk to Nembe elders. Don't make assumptions here. It goes beyond giving gifts to the bride's mother. Remember, I also mentioned matrilineal succession and customs. If a society is patrilineal, wouldn't inheritance customs be based on the father's lineage? Why then does the mother's lineage feature so strongly in Nembe culture?

dennisbee:

Erm, I didn't want to post anything on this issue, but just keep reading like I usually do. But I just couldn't hold it on this one.
Matrilineal succession in Nembe has to do with inheritance. It has got absolutely nothing to do with marriages. Traditional marriages in Nembe is patrilineal(or whatever you call it). The father remains the head of the house, and he is the one that gives his daughter out in marriage according to his customs and tradition. It is DIFFERENT from Matrilineal SUCCESSION, which is a different topic entirely as the later relates to mode of inheritance. Thank you

midehi2:

She has the right to air her views, moreover @ the bolded, not in Edo state, it can't be changed...some ugly circumstances might follow it, well i reserve my comment, afterall dem be celebrities, they might overlook it