pryme:
Is it only me that thinks introverts make the best lovers cos they pay attention to every detail?

Hmmm...paying attention to every detail may not necessarily be an advantage, sometimes its counterproductive.

I also think the introvert's "introvertedness" may cause communication issues which is bad for the relationship

Good evening guys
It's been a long time
There is something about me I want to share
I'm more attracted to introverts and ambiverts than extroverts
Cos I kind of feel uncomfortable around loud people cos when you are associated with a loud person you will often found yourself in a crowd on most occasions. And being in the mist of so many people is something I desist

Sugar97:


Hmmm...paying attention to every detail may not necessarily be an advantage, sometimes its counterproductive.

I also think the introvert's "introvertedness" may cause communication issues which is bad for the relationship

The way some of you describe being an introvert amazes me. Cos I'm an introvert and I'm a very loud and fun person with those I'm close, many of my close friends and family sees me as a talkative
So I really don't see how an introvert can have communication issues in his/her relationship unless he/she is not free with his partner, though at times I love to be alone
Maybe my introversion is just different from others though

Olarewajub:
I like people to come to my home, but i don't like them to stay too long.

Who agrees with me on this?

I do
100% correct and I find it so difficult to visit others
I had a girl that stayed with me for two weeks here in school, she is a fresher so she stayed with me till when she saw an accommodation
I wasn't comfortable during the period of her stay
My personal space was just invaded. It was hard but it's an experience that was really worth it

INTROVERTS IN THE HOUSE HOW DO/DID YOU COPE WITH A ROOM/FLAT MATE?

Hated being an introvert today, A female colleague of mine mentioned that she saw me as snob

charley94:
Hated being an introvert today, A female colleague of mine mentioned that she saw me as snob

Your being an introvert doesn't make you a snob. Extroverts can be snobs too. Introverts are not by default arrogant people neither are they annoying simply because of their personality. I just don't like it when people label others blindly. It's ludicrous, really.

The fact that she labelled you a snob is not your problem, it's her problem because she can't observe. Unless of course, you really are a snob though.

Rukkydelta:

I do
100% correct and I find it so difficult to visit others
I had a girl that stayed with me for two weeks here in school, she is a fresher so she stayed with me till when she saw an accommodation
I wasn't comfortable during the period of her stay
My personal space was just invaded. It was hard but it's an experience that was really worth it

INTROVERTS IN THE HOUSE HOW DO/DID YOU COPE WITH A ROOM/FLAT MATE?

I had a very close friend I'd known for 3 year in secondary school who happened to be attending the same uni as I. So ordinarily we got a room in the first year. It was easy to cope because he was like family but it still felt like a partial space invasion. By the beginning of second year, we got a 2-bedroom flat where we were till grad. It was easy to cope since I had my room to myself.

Anytime I have guests (it was rare though), I always receive them in the living room. If a guest I'm not close to enters my room, I feel like aliens from Mars have landed on my Earth.

DonOms:


Your being an introvert doesn't make you a snob. Extroverts can be snobs too. Introverts are not by default arrogant people neither are they annoying simply because of their personality. I just don't like it when people label others blindly. It's ludicrous, really.

The fact that she labelled you a snob is not your problem, it's her problem because she can't observe. Unless of course, you really are a snob though.

am not a snob at all

Rukkydelta:

I do
100% correct and I find it so difficult to visit others
I had a girl that stayed with me for two weeks here in school, she is a fresher so she stayed with me till when she saw an accommodation
I wasn't comfortable during the period of her stay
My personal space was just invaded. It was hard but it's an experience that was really worth it

INTROVERTS IN THE HOUSE HOW DO/DID YOU COPE WITH A ROOM/FLAT MATE?

Hmmm,Under no circumstances would I ever have a roommate again. I could remember while in uni,I had a friend who was squatting with me,one particular day she just lashed out at me that why do I always expect her to talk to me first,like I always avoid her,I was soo surprised because I just wanted to be alone,there was no strings attached. During my service year also,its was neccessary I have a roommate for security purpose,because I wasn't chatty with my roomie and other tenants,everyone would just neglect me and starts forming malice o,cos they think am intentionally doing it

Rukkydelta:


INTROVERTS IN THE HOUSE HOW DO/DID YOU COPE WITH A ROOM/FLAT MATE?

I had more than 4 roommates during my university and NYSC days (usually one roommate at a time), and we were good friends all through. Though they were/are extroverts, we went out together regularly (usually to attend church, buy food items and other stuffs) and often discussed on varieties of things.

The only time I used to find having roommate unappealing was when my roommates received visitors. I used to leave the room for them.

I have issues with keeping in touch once we stopped living together though. Even when some of them wanted to stay in touch with me, I intentionally made myself unavailable.

Windflower:

Hmmm,Under no circumstances would I ever have a roommate again. I could remember while in uni,I had a friend who was squatting with me,one particular day she just lashed out at me that why do I always expect her to talk to me first,like I always avoid her,I was soo surprised because I just wanted to be alone,there was no strings attached. During my service year also,its was neccessary I have a roommate for security purpose,because I wasn't chatty with my roomie and other tenants,everyone would just neglect me and starts forming malice o,cos they think am intentionally doing it

almost with similar experience but my own room mate went on and told our course mates that he is afraid of me (since I hardly discuss issues with him)we were class mates then but I hardly ask questions and seek for explanations on difficult analysis.for a young man studying mathematics and computer then wey computer no even dey Nigeria .I had to vacate the room for Him and relocated very far were ordinarily close person would not wanna come by for visiting. i really do not like sharing my space with any one.not even my immediate. family

The funny thing about mine is that, having studied my personality for a long time, I'm so determined not to make the 'mistake' of marrying someone who's just my type.
Would be a disaster if the kids inherit it frm both sides. lolzzz
Still not sure how this will work out though, since dating extroverted babes can be exhausting. They easily find things boring (even when quite d opposite is d case).

gidjah:
almost with similar experience but my own room mate went on and told our course mates that he is afraid of me (since I hardly discuss issues with him)we were class mates then but I hardly ask questions and seek for explanations on difficult analysis.for a young man studying mathematics and computer then wey computer no even dey Nigeria .I had to vacate the room for Him and relocated very far were ordinarily close person would not wanna come by for visiting. i really do not like sharing my space with any one.not even my immediate. family

Lol,so he was afraid of you simply because u didn't relate with him. I wonder why people are so pained because u refuse to share details of your life with them,but how did you manage without tutorials

Since we are in the holidays, I would to really like meet someone new, it could be a male or female but he or she should be someone responsible, fun-going, business minded between the ages of 20 to 26 and should reside in Lagos. Anyone interested should send me a pm and from there we could chat and decide on where to hang out.

Rukkydelta:
Good evening guys
It's been a long time
There is something about me I want to share
I'm more attracted to introverts and ambiverts than extroverts
Cos I kind of feel uncomfortable around loud people cos when you are associated with a loud person you will often found yourself in a crowd on most occasions. And being in the mist of so many people is something I desist

Hm, it also has sides effects. . . What if your partner is in pains and doesn't wanna convey how he/she feels?

True, we listen a lot and that makes us understand people, hence the usual association of kindness with introverts but it could easily become an addiction - drowning in our thoughts all day and saying nothing. . .

RealMillennial:

The funny thing about mine is that, having studied my personality for a long time, I'm so determined not to make the 'mistake' of marrying someone who's just my type.
Would be a disaster if the kids inherit it frm both sides. lolzzz
Still not sure how this will work out though, since dating extroverted babes can be exhausting. They easily find things boring (even when quite d opposite is d case).

LOL. . .! Same with me too but marrying a loud and overexpressive lady is a No No for me. . .

I can't deal with a nagging wife. I love having quiet times to myself. .

Windflower:

Hmmm,Under no circumstances would I ever have a roommate again. I could remember while in uni,I had a friend who was squatting with me,one particular day she just lashed out at me that why do I always expect her to talk to me first,like I always avoid her,I was soo surprised because I just wanted to be alone,there was no strings attached. During my service year also,its was neccessary I have a roommate for security purpose,because I wasn't chatty with my roomie and other tenants,everyone would just neglect me and starts forming malice o,cos they think am intentionally doing it

Hello dear ,I could help you deal with that - people's misunderstanding of whom you are if you permit me to.

I also do not talk much but people do not misunderstand me. They actually miss me when they do not see me for a while. Mention me if you'd like to know how.

Rukkydelta:

The way some of you describe being an introvert amazes me. Cos I'm an introvert and I'm a very loud and fun person with those I'm close, many of my close friends and family sees me as a talkative
So I really don't see how an introvert can have communication issues in his/her relationship unless he/she is not free with his partner, though at times I love to be alone
Maybe my introversion is just different from others though

Rukevwe, hope I got the pronunciation correct?

In my own opinion, you are not an introvert. . . Lols! Introverts are careful with their words, actions, inactions and how others see them. . . So, you throwing caution to the wind at the sight of people disqualifies you from this thread, my delta sister. . .

plavic:


Rukevwe, hope I got the pronunciation correct?

In my own opinion, you are not an introvert. . . Lols! Introverts are careful with their words, actions, inactions and how others see them. . . So, you throwing caution to the wind at the sight of people disqualifies you from this thread, my delta sister. . .

Lol
I won't argue with you about if I'm an introvert or not
But I have a question for you
If you are around your immediate family(the ones that you grew up with) do you feel wierd/uncomfortable with the way you do with other peeps?
Your answer to this will help you understand better on what I said

Though I may be quiet at times(when I need my personal space) among my family and close friends but I am free than when with others but I'm more free with my family cos I have known them since my existence on earth
If I having two friends that I can communicate to with ease then why shouldn't I be able to communicate with a partner/lover with ease? Except the person isn't the one for me
Yes introverts are always mindful around people that doesn't mean they won't talk when there is need to, when they are with those they are comfortable with


I grab the kind of introvert you describe and I was once like that until ending 2015 with the help of this thread and some other stuffs I read I am improving on my communication
skills with others and some other cons being an introvert could make one have

Lol. . . You are partially right. Also, like you rightly pointed out, there are several kinds of introverts. . . Mostly , everyone chart their course to introversion from different streams; ranging from family background, childhood tragedy, partial or complete difficulty, social group, family (introversion is often heredictory) e.t.c

BUT

Extroverts also exhibit the trait you mentioned about being more familiar and free with family. Extroverts can say yada-yada anywhere but are more free saying it among friends and family.

But hey, who am I to judge? If you say you're an introvert, then perhaps you are another kind from mine - cut from another clothe, if I may chirp.

I'm more of a rational, deep thinking, pragmatic introvert who doesn't believe in making much friends i.e I'm a lone wolfer.

I also believe in 'more actions and less words'.

I'm very picky and that's why I study before joining groups or existing conversations. Rukkydelta

plavic:
Lol. . . You are partially right. Also, like you rightly pointed out, there are several kinds of introverts. . . Mostly , everyone chart their course to introversion from different streams; ranging from family background, childhood tragedy, partial or complete difficulty, social group, family (introversion is often heredictory) e.t.c

BUT

Extroverts also exhibit the trait you mentioned about being more familiar and free with family. Extroverts can say yada-yada anywhere but are more free saying it among friends and family.

But hey, who am I to judge? If you say you're an introvert, then perhaps you are another kind from mine - cut from another clothe, if I may chirp.

I'm more of a rational, deep thinking, pragmatic introvert who doesn't believe in making much friends i.e I'm a lone wolfer.

I also believe in 'more actions and less words'.

I'm very picky and that's why I study before joining groups or existing conversations.

That someone can be talkative with close friends and family doesn't mean they're not introverts. They sure most likely are close to the mid point on the continuum (ambiversion) but it still doesn't mean they're not somewhat introverted. It's all a matter of degree, really. As long as they have the inherent characteristics of introversion, then they are introverts.

Now, research has shown that introversion is most likely inborn as studies show babies as little as 2-3 months exhibit unique marker characteristics that distinguish their personalities - intros or extros. So I personally do not really support the idea that different people chart their introversion course from different streams.

Many of those who were reticent and recluse as children/teens and who grew up to become extroverts were actually NOT introverts but extroverts all along. Their environment or experience or perception only shaped their childhood.

And finally, there is no such thing as 'Lord of Introverts' or 'King of Introverts,' as we can only have 'more introverted' or 'less introverted.' We shouldn't make Dr. Carl Jung do a 'SMH' from the great beyond where he yet domiciles.

DonOms, I'm trying hard to suppress the anger tingling up my thumbs. . .

We are all humans and our opinions differ. . .The neurons in the brain are as vast as the stars in outer space; making the brain a mini universe. . .
All I'm saying is, you have your ideas and they may seem impeccable to you. I also have mine and for the fact that you attached "science or research discovered" to your post doesn't make it infallible. . . They may as well be hypothetical nonsense . . Same science said the earth was flat hundreds of years ago. . . How then can you supposedly confirm that introversion is genetic as "discovered" by science?

And last but not the least, I call myself whatsoever I deem fit. It shouldn't be anyone's eye sore that I refer to myself as the lord of all introverts. . . My autobiography; my life it is . .

plavic:
DonOms, I'm trying hard to suppress the anger tingling up my thumbs. . .

We are all humans and our opinions differ. . .The neurons in the brain are as vast as the stars in outer space; making the brain a mini universe. . .
All I'm saying is, you have your ideas and they may seem impeccable to you. I also have mine and for the fact that you attached "science or research discovered" to your post doesn't make it infallible. . . They may as well be hypothetical nonsense . . Same science said the earth was flat hundreds of years ago. . . How then can you supposedly confirm that introversion is genetic as "discovered" by science?

And last but not the least, I call myself whatsoever I deem fit. It shouldn't be anyone's eye sore that I refer to myself as the lord of all introverts. . . My autobiography; my life it is . .

Firstly, there is no need to "suppress the anger tingling up your thumbs." I didn't mean to anger you, far from that, really; I simply shared my opinions and some findings, both of which are definitely not infallible. In fact, if you were patient enough to get the message in my post and ignore the emotion of "tingling anger," you'd have noticed "most likely inborn" in my post. This phrase means I never confirmed "introversion is genetic as discovered by science," you simply inferred that.

Secondly, I agree with you we are all different. In fact, I've based most of my personal research on supporting the validity of individualism and why it should matter in all our dealings. But my ideas do not seem impeccable to me. NO. I learn and unlearn everyday and that to me is the ultimate intelligence. I am very ready to learn from you if you have things to share.

Thirdly, Science didn't say the earth was flat. People did. The Flat Earth Society was a movement rather than a scientific caucus. The likes of Pythagoras and Aristotle, then Einstein later, actually disproved this fallacy using science. I agree science have been wrong a number of times, and still gets it wrong today though. It's a process and that's why we have hypotheses, theories, premises and experiments before we have facts.

Finally, you truly can call yourself whatever you like. I would have apologised that you took this a bit personal but it would be contradictory if I did - since you have literally supported the argument that we are all entitled to our opinions, and that includes my correction. I do however apologise I stirred you to near anger though, it wasn't my intention. I'm sorry.

"There is no such thing as a pure introvert or extrovert. Such a person will be in the lunatic asylum." - Dr. Carl G. Jung.

No problem, we're even. Good afternoon. . .


DonOms

plavic:
No problem, we're even. Good afternoon. . .


DonOms

Good evening.

Interesting posts from Introvert Dear today:

https://introvertdear.com/news/introvert-winter-best-time/

https://introvertdear.com/news/silence-hsp/

https://introvertdear.com/news/introvert-what-it-really-means/

Enjoy reading!

Windflower:

Lol,so he was afraid of you simply because u didn't relate with him. I wonder why people are so pained because u refuse to share details of your life with them,but how did you manage without tutorials

hmm my Dr, me is blessed with this Lil brains of mine o. Once I attend d class small, the rest na Heavens dey do am. I can really make good with memory recall. I just go back to my books and do a Li reading. Most times I go to d library to get more advanced books so to be ahead. It paid off in most cases but I had to back down when one point to first class, the school no gree give me (majorly because I ain't from that part of the location!) I kukuma settled for 'pass'.

RealMillennial:

The funny thing about mine is that, having studied my personality for a long time, I'm so determined not to make the 'mistake' of marrying someone who's just my type.
Would be a disaster if the kids inherit it frm both sides. lolzzz
Still not sure how this will work out though, since dating extroverted babes can be exhausting. They easily find things boring (even when quite d opposite is d case).

hmm maybe this is critical of, while I lived far north few years ago, I vacated my flat when I had to honor my transfer to Abuja.. I gave my flat out to this couple, freshly married, both were intros wallahi those two no dey try at all. Mumu follow join for their matter, they were both teachers in my area, by the time I came visiting that meiborhoid years back, na so so stories of hate complains full my eats. The couple weren't relating with the flat mates, the wife was pregnant and ready to deliver you can't imagine the man couldn't talk to the next guy later neibor to come help. The woman put to bed in his room yet he couldn't call the next door flat mate who is a nurse, until the new born baby died in the room yet the couple didn't raise any alarm!!! I was so disappointed at them when I came visiting. Two mature graduate married in a room but live like strangers within the compound with poor relationship. So marrying ones kind of temperament is not a good idea ever

gidjah:
hmm maybe this is critical of, while I lived far north few years ago, I vacated my flat when I had to honor my transfer to Abuja.. I gave my flat out to this couple, freshly married, both were intros wallahi those two no dey try at all. Mumu follow join for their matter, they were both teachers in my area, by the time I came visiting that meiborhoid years back, na so so stories of hate complains full my eats. The couple weren't relating with the flat mates, the wife was pregnant and ready to deliver you can't imagine the man couldn't talk to the next guy later neibor to come help. The woman put to bed in his room yet he couldn't call the next door flat mate who is a nurse, until the new born baby died in the room yet the couple didn't raise any alarm!!! I was so disappointed at them when I came visiting. Two mature graduate married in a room but live like strangers within the compound with poor relationship. So marrying ones kind of temperament is not a good idea ever

While those couple may actually be introverts, I think their reclusion goes beyond introversion. They're either both socially handicapped or somewhat mentally moronic or suffer from a severe case of shyness. To lose a child, a whole human being, because you couldn't get help? Even if there was no money, wouldn't one rather be in debt than 'kill?' May their souls be blessed!

The union of two 'normal' introverts should definitely not result to a couple as that in your example.

plavic:


Hello dear ,I could help you deal with that - people's misunderstanding of whom you are if you permit me to.

I also do not talk much but people do not misunderstand me. They actually miss me when they do not see me for a while. Mention me if you'd like to know how.

I get you but that was when I was in school,now I just try to get along with people without too much familiarity but its would be nice to hear how you do it

gidjah:
hmm maybe this is critical of, while I lived far north few years ago, I vacated my flat when I had to honor my transfer to Abuja.. I gave my flat out to this couple, freshly married, both were intros wallahi those two no dey try at all. Mumu follow join for their matter, they were both teachers in my area, by the time I came visiting that meiborhoid years back, na so so stories of hate complains full my eats. The couple weren't relating with the flat mates, the wife was pregnant and ready to deliver you can't imagine the man couldn't talk to the next guy later neibor to come help. The woman put to bed in his room yet he couldn't call the next door flat mate who is a nurse, until the new born baby died in the room yet the couple didn't raise any alarm!!! I was so disappointed at them when I came visiting. Two mature graduate married in a room but live like strangers within the compound with poor relationship. So marrying ones kind of temperament is not a good idea ever

This your story is very strong o and like Donoms said I think their case is beyond introversion. If not someone should explain the term introversion again. I am exactly like that in the sense that I don't relate with people in my environment cos I can't stand gossips and hypocrisy.Something happened last month a woman that I do not have any rapport with,just casual greetings fainted,I heard shout from her room,I went there and rendered the little help that I could. Just because we are introverted doesn't mean we should neglect people completely,like people would say,your neighbour's are your immediate family,in terms of crisis they would be the one to come to your aid first before any of your family member arrives. To the point of a baby dying,I don't think they are both mentally stable