frenzyduchess:
hhahaha,i guess I should tell her to do dry fasting for three days, watch the movie war room, then always wear bump shorts in the house, even if the money he brings for food is not enough, she should add her own money and prepare his favorite meals, address him as "my lord" ,kneel down to greet him in the morning, Abi? If he was married to a white woman,will her try this nonsense?

Ladyhippolyta88:
Oh my God madam you are a straight forward person I love the fact that you said it without deceiving yourself you are truly a logical person.Thumbs up.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Three gbosa for you.In this life it is only one life to live so people should make themselves happy and not wait for someone to make them happy.

Ladyhippolyta88:
I don tire to laugh he don do.

loneatar:
Go and flash your phone

Jman06:
You are typing "most ibo", yet you cited only two instances.

But i can name like 10 instances of abusive yoruba men, yet i can't conclude that most yoruba men are abusive. I gave you instance with the doctor i once worked for in Abuja who is a good description of an abusive husband. I can also go on and on to name more irresponsible and abusive yoruba men!

Stop being a tribal bigot son. It will be in your best interest.

correctguy101:


Com'on.... Be understanding..
There's no code of behavior for adults to adhere to.
We live and try to let live. Tolerate what you can.

Don't call him a kid just yet. (your level of thinking is entirely different from his and he could label you a kid too or an open book just for voicing your displeasure) makes no sense but some men think it makes them more of a man

Most people like the dramatic and I believe the OP is the best to stop this drama, it's a bad drama....

I still am content with just making children, marriage is not for everyone. Only my mama no wan let me rest...

frenzyduchess:
Abi o, one life, before you know she will start having high bp, infact op, you need to go and check your bp o

dafeyankee:
Talk to him about it.

You are his wife and not his girlfriend. When you notice some un-husbandly character in your man, you bring it to his attention,and you might even be surprised he has no inkling that he is hurting your feelings.

ivolt:

There is code of behaviour for all adults to adhere to, those who believe
otherwise should never be involved in relationships.


He is nothing for a kid.
I could have excused his behaviour if he is naturally anti-social and anti-caring but it
is clear that he is deliberately punishing the wife.
Whatever he labels me as is irrelevant, it will just be like a madman calling others mad.

Caring for your relative and outsiders while ignoring your wife makes you more of a man?
I believe it makes him more of a monster.

No, most people don't want to be ignored and treated as if they don't exist in any kind of relationship.
You are either in or out.


Good, so as an adult if your mama "forced" you to marry, you will take it on
your wife, frustrate her and make her life miserable?

If you couldn't stand your ground and refuse to marry why should your innocent
wife become the victim of your apparent cowardice?

Women are really suffering in this part of the world.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Abeg nor mind them I just dey like your comments,And you will certainly make a good wife and marry the one that loves,respect and value you.Read about the egalitarian form of marriage it is working for some and in that type of marriage the couple are best friends and partners not master and servant.I love your write up you are really opinionated.

LecciGucci:


I'm not an ibo person but u are an idot.!!
Do u people have to bring tribalism to Every thing? .
Seriously dont u people get tired.?.
Are yorubas and ibos the only people in Nigeria?

MidNightHunter:

Why didn't "super hot" Tonto Dike keep her marriage if dressing hot & serxy keeps marriages ....smh
Did u just said hot look ......bro,these is not a boyfriend -girlfriend relationship ,mind u .....
Marriage is very deeper than that !
My mum,yea my mum,is a deeper lifer,and u know what ?? She's having the most successful marriage u could ever dream of ! They have misunderstanding ? Yea,they do...They do "silence treatment " ? ...yea,they do...but u know what ? Their sincerity ,understanding & humbleness has kept the marriage even better & glowing for the past 30 years !!!
Did she dress sexy ?...Never ! A typical deeper life woman ! And I guess u already knows how they dress....
Then why a successful marriage without all that ..she simply understood that marriage goes beyond looks,dressing & other morphological things we attach importance to.....hence ,ladies of the "21 century" can hardly keep a successful marriage !!!....Pls ,just go to the family section & read enough for urself divorce headlines !!....That's pathetic !!
She is the standard I will use to get married !!!
Bleep sexy looks & all that !....they don't work & will NEVER work is a successful marriage !!
Celebrities are in better positions to tell u these.......
So,NEVER u use dressing & physical appearance to gauge a successful marriage....Deeper lifers & all those that understood that marriage goes beyond looks ,expensive weddings ,pre-wedding pics & "dressing to kill" had & will continue to have the most successful marriage !!!!
#I-Love-U,Mummy & I -Also-Promise-To-Follow-Ur-footsteps-In-Marriage & be the best friend & man my woman could ever dream of !!!!!!!!!!!!

xendra:
nothing should make a person male or female to treat their partners like that. why didn't the man talk about whatever it is that irritates him? to her...

MidNightHunter:

Why didn't "super hot" Tonto Dike keep her marriage if dressing hot & serxy keeps marriages ....smh
Did u just said hot look ......bro,these is not a boyfriend -girlfriend relationship ,mind u .....
Marriage is very deeper than that !
My mum,yea my mum,is a deeper lifer,and u know what ?? She's having the most successful marriage u could ever dream of ! They have misunderstanding ? Yea,they do...They do "silence treatment " ? ...yea,they do...but u know what ? Their sincerity ,understanding & humbleness has kept the marriage even better & glowing for the past 30 years !!!
Did she dress sexy ?...Never ! A typical deeper life woman ! And I guess u already knows how they dress....
Then why a successful marriage without all that ..she simply understood that marriage goes beyond looks,dressing & other morphological things we attach importance to.....hence ,ladies of the "21 century" can hardly keep a successful marriage !!!....Pls ,just go to the family section & read enough for urself divorce headlines !!....That's pathetic !!
She is the standard I will use to get married !!!
Bleep sexy looks & all that !....they don't work & will NEVER work is a successful marriage !!
Celebrities are in better positions to tell u these.......
So,NEVER u use dressing & physical appearance to gauge a successful marriage....Deeper lifers & all those that understood that marriage goes beyond looks ,expensive weddings ,pre-wedding pics & "dressing to kill" had & will continue to have the most successful marriage !!!!
#I-Love-U,Mummy & I -Also-Promise-To-Follow-Ur-footsteps-In-Marriage & be the best friend & man my woman could ever dream of !!!!!!!!!!!!

frenzyduchess:
Thanks, I will look it up,i know searching for a man like that will be very difficult, I just hope the universe sees our mind and gives us a man like us, a man that has empathy and knows that all humans are created equal

ivolt:

There is code of behaviour for all adults to adhere to, those who believe
otherwise should never be involved in relationships.


He is nothing for a kid.
I could have excused his behaviour if he is naturally anti-social and anti-caring but it
is clear that he is deliberately punishing the wife.
Whatever he labels me as is irrelevant, it will just be like a madman calling others mad.

Caring for your relative and outsiders while ignoring your wife makes you more of a man?
I believe it makes him more of a monster.

No, most people don't want to be ignored and treated as if they don't exist in any kind of relationship.
You are either in or out.


Good, so as an adult if your mama "forced" you to marry, you will take it on
your wife, frustrate her and make her life miserable?

If you couldn't stand your ground and refuse to marry why should your innocent
wife become the victim of your apparent cowardice?

Women are really suffering in this part of the world.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Dem dey just torchlight well and you will see them even in this country and don't mind that man that called you a feminist there are feminist who have been married for years.I am sure if it was a man that wrote this they would tell him to divorce her but now na woman come see advise.Some of this men are just intimidated by women who can speak for themselves and they tag them with different names.

gloria34:
really? because of advert?

Diademk07:

Lol.
Which stupid tribalism are you talking about?
I could have sworn the woman was our tenant's wife with her details! How else do you expect me not to disclose what I saw at my house, which was similar to her case? The OP is an Ibo, the tenant and his friends who also frustrate and beat their wives are Ibos! Why shouldn't I talk about what they have in common.
Yeye.

Topestbilly:

In a marriage one person have to be smart and the other have to be stupid.


You should understand we are not created equally in many ways, you'll always find people who maltreates others till this world ends. You should direct the strength you're using in fighting maltreatment to understand people and face reality.

frenzyduchess:
exactly, this is so true. Brilliant woman and women who know their rights scare them cos that will make them loose the pysocological control they have and threaten their manliness , cos such men always at any given opportunity remind you that "they are the man" as is anyone is dragging it with them

Ladyhippolyta88:
As for me I am not dragging with any man just make me your partner,best friend and confidant and there would be peace.I am grateful to God for the kind of men in my life they always encourage me and are not really egocentric.

byemx06:


thanks,
nice write up

Wow ! Really not expecting these.... ..was kind of looking forward to ur "counter"..
Your humility & gut to accept the truth just melted my heart,sir...all the best sir .. Good wife fall on ur u if not married ...If married already, GREAT children that will give u less headache fall on u....
#Festive greetings

gloria34:
thumbs up

Wow ! Thanks dear...
Biko,keep on loving ur baby o ....or do u mean ur sweetheart
#festivegreetings

frenzyduchess:
Exactly, the only reason most women are walking out of their marriages is because most men have refused to do away with those archaic mentalities our forefathers had about marriage, the worse part is they are not treat foreigners the same way, I know some bossy guys who married white women and automatically turned loving and reasonable . I still ask again and I dare anyone on this thread to give me an answer ,will the op's husband try this nonsense if he was married to a white woman?

LecciGucci:


after going through ur post i found out the type of person u are, tribalism has eaten u deep.
ALL ur comments are full of tribalism Even where they are not neccessary....Like this present topic..SMH.

Just go to ur board and click "MY POST" and u would be dissapointed in urself.

Pls i beg u... free urself ur from this mental slavery....there is more to Life than tribalism sit n think deep about it u would see its not worth it.

Have a nice day.

Ladyhippolyta88:
He won't try, it as for me I would not be a househelp in my own marriage,or even a servant I am not bossy I am very respectful but don't turn me into an idiot in the name of marriage.I am not any man's tool or object or even a property.Do unto others what you want them to do for you,if you want respect as a man respect your wife it is mutual and never a one way thing.Today's women would not take rubbish from any man.

frenzyduchess:
there are things that people should be encouraged to take, if I offend you as a husband why not tell me so I can apologize, why will you resort to emotionally and psychologically abuse a woman you swore on to love and protect, why will you ridicule the same woman in the presence of your family, friends neighbours and even street people. I can't even begin to imagine the trauma and loss of self esteem he has put the op through, anyone who doesn't see this either doesn't have sense of empathy or is the same monster as the op, as birds of a feather flock together