MrBrownJay1:




she portrayed him as a demon, my reply was for the babe supposedly living with a demon.
we can never hear 2 sides of a story here on NL (99% of the time), therefore our answers will always be based on what the OP wrote... because if we all waited for the other party to give us their version before replying, then NL would be a waste of time.

BadLuckonmyGame:
wen u have just one part a story, the best u do is screw the reporter with enough questions to get more info before u pass judgement... Did u border to ask the op any question before call the man a demon?

MrBrownJay1:




she portrayed him as a demon, my reply was for the babe supposedly living with a demon.
we can never hear 2 sides of a story here on NL (99% of the time), therefore our answers will always be based on what the OP wrote... because if we all waited for the other party to give us their version before replying, then NL would be a waste of time.



thats why i said she should ask whats is the problem... before ending this charade for good.

correctguy101:


You're right boss.

It's important tho that we try as much to pacify our fellow nairalander so she won't make a mistake that will cost her.

I believe in happiness and I'm deeply touched by this her story. I could understand the feeling but I'm sure the man is deeply pained about something and I just want her to find it and settle it fast.

No need to spoil the man for her by calling him names....

Mariangeles:
Not jealousy in that kind of way nah...I meant the light kind, it does spice up relationship.

MrBrownJay1:


let me guess, women in Nigeria shouldnt divorce their useless husbands, and they should instead stay in their MISERABLE union (like common donkeys), till the bastard they are married to finally do away with them, abi?!

no wonder some men have absolutely NO respect for women, when these same women have no respect for their damn self.

there is absolutely NO reason under the sun why this woman should stay married to this demon, if that man does not want to change.

MrIjapa:


Divorce is not that easy.. especially in Nigeria..

Boss13:


No she did not forget. She deliberately ignored it and portrayed a story to describe the husband as the wicked one. These are the whips of women; to obscure facts and present fictions in order to attract sentiments.

Don’t wallow in pity for this woman, she is the architect of her own situation. When you hear from the husband on this same matter, you may regret the comments you have previously made.

Balkan:
Let me be honest with you, l am married for ten years now. The atitude your guy is giving you is exertly what l give my wife

In my own case, it started well but there so many things she does that l dislike which l told her that it irritates me but she always nags why l tell her that.

1. She is always unclad in the room. I mean always. She never covers herself.
2, When ever she inters the toilet to poo she never shuts the door of the toilet in our room.
3 She always fart in front of me
4 She always ask for things she knows we cant afford.
5 She does not give me any spacial attention eg. No saperation of things l use from the things everbody use in the house like plates and cups

So many littles things that matter to guys she does not observe them and when l bring them up, she will tell me that l hate her.

The truth is that l dont get errection again when l see her. So to make love to her is difficult because l dont get erection. But when l see ladies she is much more finer than, my dick stands

We hardley sit to talk because she irritates me. But l am just praying for God to help me. I am not ready to marry another woman. But the love is dead. She does not respect me bc l cant perform but l cant take vigra for her because l am BP patient.

She is in her 30s and l am in my 40s

But she is just a pretty lady with good sense of dressing. A dream of every man but worths nothing to me

tunjilana:
I no knw which side you from come but my own grandma dey follow grandpale go farm steady, till soil together.My grandma also they carry stuff go market on market days and she dey coordinate sale of their farm produce. she popular so tey she chop iyaloja for villa. ...Most men will pick a woman who has all the good qualities of a wife + hard-working and independent.As for what the bible says pls read proverbs 31 very well. That verse speaks about a cool headed and hard working business woman. My dear that is the kinda woman God advised his sons to pick not the one who sits pretty and believes advise is all she should give. I laugh when I hear this advise thing sef....how many brain dey babes of this generation head wey den wan take advise correct guy to success

MrBrownJay1:


let me guess, women in Nigeria shouldnt divorce their useless husbands, and they should instead stay in their MISERABLE union (like common donkeys), till the bastard they are married to finally do away with them, abi?!

no wonder some men have absolutely NO respect for women, when these same women have no respect for their damn self.

there is absolutely NO reason under the sun why this woman should stay married to this demon, if that man does not want to change.

Balkan:
Let me be honest with you, l am married for ten years now. The atitude your guy is giving you is exertly what l give my wife

In my own case, it started well but there so many things she does that l dislike which l told her that it irritates me but she always nags why l tell her that.

1. She is always unclad in the room. I mean always. She never covers herself.
2, When ever she inters the toilet to poo she never shuts the door of the toilet in our room.
3 She always fart in front of me
4 She always ask for things she knows we cant afford.
5 She does not give me any spacial attention eg. No saperation of things l use from the things everbody use in the house like plates and cups

Now, this is really serious!

So many littles things that matter to guys she does not observe them and when l bring them up, she will tell me that l hate her.

The truth is that l dont get errection again when l see her. So to make love to her is difficult because l dont get erection. But when l see ladies she is much more finer than, my dick stands

We hardley sit to talk because she irritates me. But l am just praying for God to help me. I am not ready to marry another woman. But the love is dead. She does not respect me bc l cant perform but l cant take vigra for her because l am BP patient.

She is in her 30s and l am in my 40s

But she is just a pretty lady with good sense of dressing. A dream of every man but worths nothing to me

favouredAda:
Gud pm nairalanders.

I'm a young lady in my early 30, married for 2years+ now... my issue is that my husband doesn't gist with me but when he is with other ladies, he can laugh & gist for Africa. He has never taken me out after our marriage. in short I look like a tenant in his house. if we are going out he will tell me to be in front while he will b far behind. if I complain, he will say I'm nagging.

I was sick last week, he just came dropped #10k for me to go see our doctor, he didn't even ask if I can go by myself BT same incident happened to his younger bro wife yesterday, with just a phone call, he went to the hospital & stood by d bro. over night ( sumtin he didn't even do wen I gave birth to our baby) I have been thinking he will change BT this days own his really worst, calling some girls in my streets "my love" why he shout my 1st name no matter where he is.

Pls advise me cos I am beginning to dislike him

Daboomb:


Jayzus Christ!

How do things get to this stage and nobody can take corrective action?
I can imagine what you are going through...l mean, even l, a ,man, cannot fart in front to my wife or even my children, it will be so embarrassing but we all fart and know to excuse yourself to some place where you can do it discreetly!
Common courtesy demands that you don tleave the En Suit Toilet door open and allow the smell of defecation to return back into the bedroom! Infact, you must open the windows and use deodorant immediately any of use use our common En Suit bath/toilet, so as to keep it clean for your spouse!
And I will find it very disrespectful if even my eldest son uses my Jug to drink!
Everyone in the house will tell you , "That is Dad's Jug, drop it down". No stories
We all have our plates and personal things that we all respect and wont use that of others.... and there are more than enough of such stuffs anyway so, there isno need to use what others are "used to suing". It is an unpsoken rule that we all observe.
I cant imagine my wife using my own plate to serve a visitor. The kind "red eye" l will throw in her direction sef, she will know that a line has been crossed.

As to the walking unclad within the house, if it is just two of you in that house and there is "extreme privacy" ....l wouldn't mind if l were you but then, when you dislike a woman to the point two of youare right now, the things that are supposed to trip you, will be so annoying to you!
She is just not appealing to you anymore.
When we really dont have anything to do on a weekend, me and my wife can be inside our "honeymoon space" (as we call our Master bedroom) from the previous night till 4pm in the evening! naked all through! Sleep, sex, wakeup, drink sole liquids, sleep, sex, talk, e.t.c, just the two of us (children know not to knock more than once, if not opened, then they use the intercom to say whatever they want and then bleep-off).
Husband and Wife must have their private and quiet times always, to BOND further.
But when "love dont live hear-anymore, it is another story!

If your wife asks for what SHE KNOWS both of you cant afford, then tell her to increase her work and income so she can afford it herself.
You should not steal just to satisfy the avarice of your spouse or kill yourself while trying to. That is not love. Love shhould be understanding and protective of the other spouse and not push them too hard.

As itis now, what do oyu think can be done to re-awaken this love that died or did you not love her at some times in the past?
Does she do all these things back then?
marriage is a very serious matter than can make or mar both of you so it has to be handled with some determination and effort.
For eample, when you talk to her about farting in your presence, what is her response?
Is it that she finds nothing wrong in that behaviour (probably due to fualty upbringing, some homes dont see it as anything wrong)
Have you tried to educate her on the need for respecting others, even your spouse, to keep certain things private and not cause odiferous odour to return back into the Master Bedroom? Whats her reaction?

Can she change?
can other women talk to her?
What about her parents, when things are really getting out of hand, can they be of help or is it a case of "bad in-laws worse than a bad wife""?

I dont like couples to break over matters that can be resolved, it really brings me down.
Both of you are at an age when you should begin to really enjoy each others company

dafeyankee:
Talk to him about it.

You are his wife and not his girlfriend. When you notice some un-husbandly character in your man, you bring it to his attention,and you might even be surprised he has no inkling that he is hurting your feelings.

Macgreat:


Pardon,

What I meant is this;

Your great grand parents who when to the farm. Your great grand mother went farming, right? Working along side your great grand father. In this scenario, is it the man that is providing for the family all by himself working in the farm. Has nature not showed us that women are and should be co - provider along side their man.

MrBrownJay1:


dont need to, i gave her a reply based on the information at my disposal....but hey, if YOU needed more information before you could give your reply, then by all means do so.

no question i may have asked can bring SANITY into the insane act that she wrote, NONE!

Caprigal:

Honestly, I was just reading and shaking my head. This site has many immature and sexist males its appalling. No one is even showing sympathy for the woman, they are all apportioning blame and asking her to solve the problems her husband caused.
If the tables were turned this thread will be 20 pages long with men insulting the wife for flirting outside and ignoring her husband at home.

Daboomb:

I bet it was your Dad you went to, when you had your first menstral cycle? When you started having Pubic hair, it was your dad that you went to, for explanations?
Even the Bible admonished Mothers (elderly women, to train the younger ladies), it did not same fathers, for a reason.


But where one of the Parents is absent, that duaghter or son, loses out o such training or does not get the best form of it.

I have given you enough clues now.

DeRay98:


Misuse of Bible statement. In the Bible that statement refers to human beings in general without any sex bias.
The whole of your first sentence is outright nonsense. Before you started sensible advice in later paragraphs.

Daboomb:


Dumb azz!
I am sure that in your femminazzi-mind, you think the Bible was referring to a MALE, when that phrase was used?

FYI, the use of "MAN" in the Bible refers to creations of God, both Male and Female.
and it is "man", not "men" that was used in the Bible.
Go and read again pleaze.

Sebi heart of woman is not wicked and one just stabbed her husband in his blockus, just because he was talking to his first wife, a Muslim for that matter!

Mariangeles:
on her knees for what exactly...?

Rosarie:
to pray

Mariangeles:
I figured out later but by then I had already commented,then I was like...oh well, you know...

jagugu88li:
This statement says it all my dear. No need to explain.

Did I poke ny nose? Ooops

favouredAda:
Gud pm nairalanders.

I'm a young lady in my early 30, married for 2years+ now... my issue is that my husband doesn't gist with me but when he is with other ladies, he can laugh & gist for Africa. He has never taken me out after our marriage. in short I look like a tenant in his house. if we are going out he will tell me to be in front while he will b far behind. if I complain, he will say I'm nagging.

I was sick last week, he just came dropped #10k for me to go see our doctor, he didn't even ask if I can go by myself BT same incident happened to his younger bro wife yesterday, with just a phone call, he went to the hospital & stood by d bro. over night ( sumtin he didn't even do wen I gave birth to our baby) I have been thinking he will change BT this days own his really worst, calling some girls in my streets "my love" why he shout my 1st name no matter where he is.

Pls advise me cos I am beginning to dislike him

vivavik:
...how many divorce cases would we have if we go by ur assertion? We are a traditional set of people, divorce is seriously frowned at, and the women are at the receiving end!!!
PS: This isnt a western nation.

mikolo80:
for better for worse. Abi you be atheist

Memories12411:

The heart of men and I mean male. Jeremiah 17:9 generalizes everything but men are exceptionally wicked to their wives when they choose to be.

Jman06:
Please keep it up. Never settle for a misogynist because i believe that it is misogyny that makes some guys think they can treat a woman any how.
Always look out for those little signs when you are courting a man. The signs of misogyny are always there! Run away from any guy that feels that men are lord over women. Even by their utterances you will know. Observe the way he treat other women, his mom and sisters inclusive. Any guy that utters such sentences as "Do you know I am a man?" Or "Why don't you act like a woman?",Or "Women are evil!" etc, is a misogynist and you should run away from them.
Also, guys raised in an all-boys home have greater tendency of being misogynists, so watch out!

I wish you luck in your search.

djon78:



I beg to disagree with what you said. I do make those statements like 'don't you know I am a man' and 'Why don't you act like a woman', but that doesn't make me a misogynist or whatever you call that. I have great respect and value for women, although bad experiences from past relationships made me much wiser, because just like there are terrible breed of men out there, also there very strange and terrible breed of women. Just that one has to be very cautious, look well before they leap and also God helps too.

One of the things I have discovered is that the reason why there are so many problems in relationships and marriages nowadays is that both men and women, have failed to understand the other genders well. Also bad behaviour and attitudes learned overtime and environmental influences also plays a role. And to be honest, once these factors are not addressed, going into marriage with such people, your case will be like the OPs own. There are some people you can never ever stay with, because of exhibition of the factors mentioned.