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I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? - Romance - Nairaland

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I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by MensTable: 9:41pm On Dec 29, 2017
Most of us men have grown up with the notion that a good woman knows how to take care of you, makes you feel good and knows how to meet your ‘needs’.

Needs are usually defined in terms of domestic capabilities, she can cook, clean, take care of kids, doesn’t nag much and possibly very good in “the oza room”. I mean, what else does a man need?

We have heard that a man only needs good food and good sex…they say once you can do these, a man doesn’t need so much more… Many ladies have told me this and a side of me wonders how that has become the totality of man, yet no matter how much they perform on this level, their men still cheat.

There are many reasons a man cheats, and there is no excuse why it must be accepted as norm, however, I have found that men are often misunderstood in relationships mostly by themselves, therefore we often do not know what we must look for in the woman that must satisfy us inside out, such that cheating may be a thought, but hardly ever an action. I believe that one of the reasons a man cheats, albeit a major is a lack of understanding of who he is and why he does what he does.

Man is a living soul:

The Soul is separated into 3 distinct areas:
– The Will: Where his values reside, what he considers right or wrong, morality, decision processing sphere, often long-term, hardly changes, the side that latently controls all actions

– ‎The Intellect: Where he thinks, have preferences, natural inclinations and attractions, often midterm, could change if he sees or is influenced better

– ‎The Emotions: Where he feels, senses, desires, often temporary, short-term, happens often and changes rapidly, nothing is fixed here

From the above, you can already see that the issues of a man’s sensuality are on the shortest term, duration and changes mostly with moments, that’s why he eats a meal now and prefers omething else next time, has sex now and wants another soon after and then moment you’re a woman is fixated on satisfying these…she’s like the cocaine that sets you high on a fix, the moment you run low, you want more…in this case anyone can offer this fix.
The often neglected are the Will and Intellect, because we focus on the emotions that seem to happen more often and seem less active, but we all know that when you pour Coca-Cola into a glass and it foams, no matter how much you lap up the foam, the drink is the real deal.

A lot of men are not self aware many of us have never studied ourselves as much as we have our jobs, we do not know our prefences and what makes us tick, so the moment we meet a woman who can cook clean and clinch we believe we have found a soulmate, just because she looks presentable to ‘mama’, forgetting that it’s not mama that will live with that human being.

A wife is like a friend you are allowed to sleep with, on most levels you click on decisions, preferences and interests, you don’t agree on everything but you still work around he edges and move ahead with your lives while you remain independent individuals with interdependent pursuit in life.

So…for a woman to satisfy her husband, she must be satisfying all three areas to the highest level as she can…same thing for the man.

However, the moment we pick one that satisfies the emotional basic level, we get used to that and then when we run low on the will and intelligence levels, she’s not suitable to fix those two, so we spend more time with colleagues, friends, and the secretary who seems to “get it” when we talk, eventually the emotions kick in and then we wonder…’how come those clothes came off so fast’ or just the zipper. Often times, when the other two are well taken care of, chances are that the last one is more effectively managed and worked on.

We have a responsibility to know ourselves …then we can have a wholesome perspective on which partners to choose, because marriage is a long-term longtin.

What do you think?

Source: http://blog.menstable.org/cheat/

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Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 10:00pm On Dec 29, 2017
So long a letter I have forgotten the author's name.

The name of the author is Mariama Ba.

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Ashleydolls(f): 10:03pm On Dec 29, 2017
In summary please?

2 Likes

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nightking04(m): 10:21pm On Dec 29, 2017
All these people that don't know how to summarise...Let it not enter next year.

5 Likes

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 11:54pm On Dec 29, 2017
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.

2 Likes

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by habsydiamond(m): 12:19am On Dec 30, 2017
Plz make Una dey summarise Una Indian film ooo....people dey sleep on top oooo.....
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Macgreat(m): 12:23am On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.

I'll cheat and you still be loving me cheesy

Besides, there's no cheating if there was no marriage.

As a boyfriend, I can and will hang around as many girls as possible and enjoy their company.

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 5:06am On Dec 30, 2017
Macgreat:


I'll cheat and you still be loving me cheesy

Besides, there's no cheating if there was no marriage.

As a boyfriend, I can and will hang around as many girls as possible and enjoy their company.

You cheat and I still love you, are we in a fairy world here?
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 5:24am On Dec 30, 2017
there no justification for cheating..as a man,you have failed yourself if you cheat on your girlfriend or wife.

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Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by cerowo(f): 5:40am On Dec 30, 2017
Abegi.... A cheat is a cheat irrespective of the gender and it shouldn't be encourage at all

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Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by ubunja(m): 5:41am On Dec 30, 2017
sekxy:
there no justification for cheating..as a man,you have failed yourself if you cheat on your girlfriend or wife.
weak attempt at manipulating men with reverse psychology grin
so men will think to "man up" and not cheat grin grin grin

lmfaooooo!!!!!!!
women thou.

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 6:05am On Dec 30, 2017
ubunja:
weak attempt at manipulating men with reverse psychology grin so men will think to "man up" and not cheat grin grin grin
lmfaooooo!!!!!!! women thou.
really yeah!!
so you plan cheating on your wife shocked
ubunja repent
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by ubunja(m): 6:10am On Dec 30, 2017
sekxy:

really yeah!!

so you plan cheating on your wife shocked

ubunja repent
cheating is a small thing
my wife will be the one finding gals for me to fvck.
she will also be joining in.coz i always turn my women into bisexuals
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 6:14am On Dec 30, 2017
ubunja:
cheating is a small thing my wife will be the one finding gals for me to fvck. she will also be joining in.coz i always turn my women into bisexuals
kingtblack in making

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by ubunja(m): 6:19am On Dec 30, 2017
sekxy:

kingtblack in making
you know women fantasize about their best friends here and there.dont act innocent. even you have that one gal you are willing to go lesbian for.
wink

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Blackhawk03(f): 6:20am On Dec 30, 2017
ubunja:

cheating is a small thing
my wife will be the one finding gals for me to fvck.
she will also be joining in.coz i always turn my women into bisexuals

I hope you'll get her other guys to fvck too... undecided

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 6:23am On Dec 30, 2017
ubunja:

you know women fantasize about their best friends here and there.dont act innocent. even you have that one gal you are willing to go lesbian for.
wink
jeeze that's an awful thought shocked


I might not be religious,but I still have decorum,,

lol..any girl that tries that shiit with me goes down the lane..won't even tolerate such sef.
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Martin0(m): 6:24am On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.

Na so e easy for u to do abi!
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by ubunja(m): 6:26am On Dec 30, 2017
Blackhawk03:


I hope you'll get her other guys to fvck too... undecided
my home is not a democracy.its a Game of Thrones.
once she asks for that she is fired.


anyways gals lose value in their own eyes when they slut.gals gain self-esteem by finding Prince Charming. and staying loyal to him.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by ubunja(m): 6:32am On Dec 30, 2017
sekxy:

jeeze that's an awful thought shocked


I might not be religious,but I still have decorum,,

lol..any girl that tries that shiit with me goes down the lane..won't even tolerate such sef.
but u seen it happen havent you?

1 Like

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Macgreat(m): 7:21am On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
You cheat and I still love you, are we in a fairy world here?

No, but no girl should be screaming cheating when she ain't married to him.
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Marcelo290(m): 7:29am On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.
I could be cheating on you but you would never catch me...grin cool
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by MissWrite(f): 7:59am On Dec 30, 2017
This is the most honest insight (written by a man) on the psyche of a man as it concerns cheating that I have read on this forum. Op, oil dey your head, walahi! You're right, it does come from a lack of self awareness and the failure to tame emotions with the Will. But here's the thing: A man may feel that he doesn't need to have himself fully sorted out in that regard (becoming self-aware) because he feels he can always cheat or marry someone else if the first one doesn't 'click'. (This thinking is a product of the values he has and his Will will only be strong enough to protect his values). Most men find it easy to settle down with women they barely even know; as soon as their mind is set on marriage, they ask mum, sister or friend to hook them up with someone and boom! Two months later, they're hitched. In contrast, women are advised to look well before they leap because, culturally, they aren't perceived to be resilient in relationships. So they they make the effort to know themselves, and to find someone who is compatible. Whereas, men naively assume that they can make a match for anyone.

If men begin to see cheating as a vice, they would be shrewder when choosing suitable mates. They would try harder to understand their emotional and intellectual needs, and develop their will to protect the values they hold.
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by SIINXU: 8:07am On Dec 30, 2017
Why cheat when you can get her consent to Bleep around?
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Nobody: 8:34am On Dec 30, 2017
Marcelo290:
I could be cheating on you but you would never catch me...grin cool

Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Kobicove(m): 8:59am On Dec 30, 2017
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by QuietHammer(m): 9:41am On Dec 30, 2017
I am a man, the gods' gift to women. I will not be tied down by monogamy. I shall not shame the gods by being a monogamous sissy.
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by kense88: 10:36am On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.
Cheating is totally unacceptable whether done by the guy or the lady. If you are not comfortable with your partner anymore, is better you break up before engaging in any sexual activity with another person
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by femi4: 10:47am On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.
leave story.... People like you will end up being 2nd or 3rd wife
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Oxster(m): 12:00pm On Dec 30, 2017
Purebeerry:
I don't care why a man cheat, cheat and I will dump your sorry ass.

U r very funny,I hope u gat a man cos is obvious with that attitude of yours you don't have
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by habsydiamond(m): 8:52pm On Dec 30, 2017
Oxster:


U r very funny,I hope u gat a man cos is obvious with that attitude of yours you don't have
my guy dey press brake small small ooo
Re: I Gave You My All…Why Would You Do This To Me? by Oxster(m): 9:17pm On Dec 30, 2017
habsydiamond:
my guy dey press brake small small ooo

Lol,,I de pity dah gal oh

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