Blackfyre:


Honestly you understand how men think and what they want, at least for me,your disection of the matter was soothing. I swear i was literally jumping on my feet reading your comment...

I have a question, is it possible to make a woman see things this way if she is bent on standing toe to toe with a man and interpretes everything as a man trying to have dominance over her?

She believes in a relationship or marriage, it should be partnership rather than recognising the man as the head even though as you have said, its more of submission. He really doesn't have an interest to exercise dominance over her or authority in a condescending way but observe his status as the man or the reverence(i hope this word isnt too strong) due to him?

@bolded Thanks

And you, have captured perfectly what the world now calls, "the modern woman", or "the civilised woman" or"liberated woman".
The funny thing is women have become all that because the men ask for it.
Men keep shouting that they can't date a woman who is not making her money forgetting that with financial indepence comes some sort of liberation. Women are now making their money; women now feel liberated. Money does give some feeling of liberation. They don't need anything from you and don't understand the seeming "control" from you.

To your question, it's gonna be very hard but nothing is impossible.
You would have a lot of teaching, explaining to do (and you mustn't loose your temper while doing all of this).
It would feel like training a child.
And you know how annoying it can be when an adult needs to be handled like a child.
It's like trying to reprogram the DNA.

So the question more rather is, "are you willing to do all of the work?"

Before you get into a relationship, you need to find out what her mindset is, is marriage a relationship or a partnership to her?

And as for men, if you're not taking care of your "financially independent" woman's need, as per she takes care of her needs financially even while in a relationship with you, as per na her money you chook eye put and you want her to be submissive, take it from me, you are joking.

She is likely gonna stand toe to toe with ya.
But...there are exceptions.

zainmaxwell:
I meant If you treat me right I will do u well

Oh! Okay no.
But there's something called "cause and effect".

There's something going on with the women folk that the men don't seem to get. 'Just tryna explain.

Incrizz:


Oh! Okay no.
But there's something called "cause and effect".

There's something going on with the women folk that the men don't seem to get. 'Just tryna explain.

most times it just understanding that matters but some ladies are difficult to understand some don't know what dey want

[quote author=Incrizz post=63737974]

@bolded Thanks

And you, have captured perfectly what the world now calls, "the modern woman", or "the civilised woman" or"liberated woman".
The funny thing is women have become all that because the men ask for it.
Men keep shouting that they can't date a woman who is not making her money forgetting that with financial indepence comes some sort of liberation. Women are now making their money; women now feel liberated. Money does give some feeling of liberation. They don't need anything from you and don't understand the seeming "control" from you.

To your question, it's gonna be very hard but nothing is impossible.
You would have a lot of teaching, explaining to do (and you mustn't loose your temper while doing all of this).
It would feel like training a child.
And you know how annoying it can be when an adult needs to be handled like a child.
It's like trying to reprogram the DNA.

So the question more rather is, "are you willing to do all of the work?"

You got that perfectly! It is really big work. Also I am quite temperamental at times especially if circumstances are tense at the time. It's really an undertaking that requires a very mature hand,a great deal of patience and a very relaxed approach.

Before you get into a relationship, you need to find out what her mindset is, is marriage a relationship or a partnership to her?

Indeed, that point cannot be overemphasized. Most times women never fail to tell you the sort of person they are from the get go. One should always pay very close attention as i have come to note.

And as for men, if you're not taking care of your "financially independent" woman's need, as per she takes care of her needs financially even while in a relationship with you, as per na her money you chook eye put and you want her to be submissive, take it from me, you are joking.

My mom who would easily pass as peeps grandma told me this. She said it in the most blunt way she could muster and strongly advised against such arrangements...

Thanks i appreciate. It's nice to know there are females who are in such wavelength.

You have got to be in your 30s tho...

Blackfyre:

Also I am quite temperamental at times especially if circumstances are tense at the time. It's really an undertaking that requires a very mature hand,a great deal of patience and a very relaxed approach.

Nicely captured.

Aww..don't worry, you too will get the woman who gets tickled by your temperament. Only that when she comes, don't go concentrating on other areas she doesn't "meet up".

The 30-ish part. Looka you
Are you repeating what you were told?

Your grandma told you right.
She spoke because she's a woman.
We women understand women

I read a comment on front page where the guy prayed loudly that anything that would make him financially dependent on a woman, God should drive it far for him lol...
For me, that is a wise man.
And that is the attitude men need to adopt instead of hoping to share rent with Wifey. That mentality already sets a man lower than he ought to rise.

Don't get me wrong, splitting rent with Wifey arnt a bad thing at all but when a single guy sees that as the only way to survive, he's beginning to sink to that position where he may be at the mercy of the female in his own home.
It's a wrong mentality.

God has made you the head of your home. Ask Him for the resources you need to make it a reality in your home. Ask God for financial resources, spiritual resources and resources in every facet of your life. HE'd give you.

zainmaxwell:
most times it just understanding that matters but some ladies are difficult to understand some don't know what dey want

Yeah...understanding.
Well, maybe realising that a woman is an emotional being may help a lot of men understand their woman better.

Learning to find the emotional name for her actions may help your understanding of her as well as your dealings with her.

Some women act "stupid" when angry.
You telling her something like "You're angry" rather than "why did you do this?" May yeild better fruit.

But it arnt easy man.

It's just that there are people who have mastered the art of relationship as well as communication.

Incrizz:

Nicely captured.

Aww..don't worry, you too will get the woman who gets tickled by your temperament. Only that when she comes, don't go concentrating on other areas she doesn't "meet up".

The 30-ish part. Looka you
Are you repeating what you were told?

Your grandma told you right.
She spoke because she's a woman.
We women understand women

I read a comment on front page where the guy prayed loudly that anything that would make him financially dependent on a woman, God should drive it far for him lol...
For me, that is a wise man.
And that is the attitude men need to adopt instead of hoping to share rent with Wifey. That mentality already sets a man lower than he ought to rise.

Don't get me wrong, splitting rent with Wifey arnt a bad thing at all but when a single guy sees that as the only way to survive, he's beginning to sink to that position where he may be at the mercy of the female in his own home.
It's a wrong mentality.

God has made you the head of your home. Ask Him for the resources you need to make it a reality in your home. Ask God for financial resources, spiritual resources and resources in every facet of your life. HE'd give you.

What do you mean "other areas", have you been reading my posts?
Be honest

Indeed, i have come to know that for a fact. All this tale of we will build it together, everyone starts from somewhere small and the idea a woman will genuinely respect a man who she earns than is a complete lie. All the women saying this are telling a fat lie! Except for those very rare exceptions.

I have no fears on my financial capabilities at all when the time comes. God has more than assured me on his word it was why i was confident enough to find out what it feels like before the time comes.

No one told me oh, i just feel you are in your 30s. I could be wrong tho, some of us mature faster than our ages.

Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.


Cc: Lalasticlala
Cc: Farano
Cc: Rocktation
Cc: Mynd44

well this sucks most especially for you but what i dont like is how you excused yourself from any wrong and passed all you hurt and bitterness to men. let me tell you its true that men like women who will stick to them through thick and thin but that dosent mean as a woman you shouldn't be smart enough to pick the right man. from your description of your boyfriend he is clearly an NFA, who is fininancially irresponsible and to make things even worst a gambler, now please dont tell me you never noticed all this things while you are dating him and for that i think you should also be blamed for this. also am a guy i dont have much now but i know where i want to be five years from now, i know how to make and spend my money wisely, i want to further my education and expand my little business too, am introverted and not outgoing and most people around me give me the complement of being a nice guy (am not braging ooo)but you see you ladies dont like all that, you prefer to hang around bad boys and in return expect to get good things out of them and when reality sets on you instead learning from it, you tag all men as bad. this shiit got to stop in 2017 please.

Blackfyre:


What do you mean "other areas", have you been reading my posts?
Be honest

Indeed, i have come to know that for a fact. All this tale of we will build it together, everyone starts from somewhere small and the idea a woman will genuinely respect a man who she earns than is a complete lie. All the women saying this are telling a fat lie! Except for those very rare exceptions.

I have no fears on my financial capabilities at all when the time comes. God has more than assured me on his word it was why i was confident enough to find out what it feels like before the time comes.

No one told me oh, i just feel you are in your 30s. I could be wrong tho, some of us mature faster than our ages.

Hahaha...no o.'Haven't been reading your posts.

No no, that's not true. A woman would respect a man she earns more than. Really she would. It's natural to her.
It all depends on how the guy comports himself around her and her money.

You need to see the way some guys pant after a female's money these days.

Like a hound sniffing.
This used to be a female thing.
But these guys have become ruthless in going after a female's money in a mind boggling way.

You prolly don't know this because you're a guy.

You can literally see how a guy's mien changes at the whiff of mint from your wallet.

I think I'm digressing.

Missali:


You rushed to comment without reading hence your comment.

honey,u dont have to reply all d comments especially d senseless 1s

Incrizz:


Hahaha...no o.'Haven't been reading your posts.

No no, that's not true. A woman would respect a man she earns more than. Really she would. It's natural to her.
It all depends on how the guy comports himself around her and her money.

You need to see the way some guys pants after a female's money these days.

Like a hound sniffing.
This used to be a female thing.
But these guys have become ruthless in going after a female's money in a mind boggling way.

You prolly don't know this because you're a guy.

You can literally see how a guy's mien changes at the whiff of mint from your wallet.

I think I'm digressing.

Well you may have a point on how he comports himself around such women. But i still think its rare.

Say wetin happen? same naija guys that bash women on here? i dont believe that. some and i think very few may exists in such respect but most naija guys wey i know oh, their ego is too much for that. Maybe the ones who are poor or have no way of making it on their own. But then, there is internet scams, yahoo plus, betnaija and a host of others they would readily consider than being subservient to a woman because of money.

are you speaking from personal experiences?

Blackfyre:


Well you may have a point on how he comports himself around such women. But i still think its rare.

Say wetin happen? same naija guys that bash women on here? i dont believe that. some and i think very few may exists in such respect but most naija guys wey i know oh, their ego is too much for that. Maybe the ones who are poor or have no way of making it on their own. But then, there is internet scams, yahoo plus, betnaija and a host of others they would readily consider than being subservient to a woman because of money.

are you speaking from personal experiences?

Okay if you say so but I wasn't talking about subservience but leeching.
Survival strategy?

dat guy is a disgrace to real men out dere. dats the fact. he messed up. but sis dnt use dat to judge all men. they are some dat wen they succeed they carry the woman along. and dont forget that they are cases that a guy will care for his girl but she will still dump him for a richer guy

Incrizz:


Okay if you say so but I wasn't talking about subservience but leaching.
Survival strategy?

Ooohh leeching? well that very well exist. though i would think they before to be subservient before they can leech from a woman. But its not as common with single ladies as is it with single mothers/widows looking for companion. Anyways, blame Buhari

Point taken...

incrizz

come oh..i got a question to ask your opinion.

The guy in question is an ungrateful soul and doesn't deserve any form of pity. The fact that he messed up shouldn't ruin the chances of guys within his financial level whom are interested to dating you.

He had the chance to make it right with you which he had blew anyway.

However, vice versa to ladies looking out for rich guys thinking when he gives money to them, he would become the ultimate rich mugu for their financial upkeeps. Some of these guys are time bomb waiting to explode during marriage. This is the reason some maltreat their wives anyhow since they know she won't contribute nothing to them financially.

He made "a million"

I don't even believe this your story sef..

Moral lesson; never live ur life for someone, she was living a life full of expectation for someone thats why she was disappointed. She should have hustled on ur own instead of wasting ur time and resources on someone else.

Men are just horrible as times. This is why I advice ladies not to pity them at times. Be smart with your choices.

Your boyfriend won a million naira and the first thing he did was abscond with another girl and blow the money off.Who does that..it's either the guy was never into you or this story is just pure bullshit made up by a slay quuen to justify their gold digging tendencies

Moreover i don't understand.Is standing by a man when he is broke a job or why do girls think they deserve compensation for it?
.If I can make it any girl should be able to,or what was the girl doing why I was trying to better my condition?Having sex with me and squeezing the little change I have out of my hands?

I would never tell a girl to stand by me if I was broke and those who want to stay should realize that I don't owe them anything if I hit the gold.

What nonsense

Dis your story get comma, get apostrophe get asterix.....everything

Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.

The simple answer is he never loved you. Success is a much bigger test than poverty. One of the key insights to a man's character is what he does when he hits money be it a large amount, or a small amount. Does he spend on himself? Does he invest? Does he buy things he put on hold? Does he spend on his family or his SO or his newly acquired friends?

Not sure if your story is true or click bait, but I would say you dodged a bullet. Your guy sounds like the type that would waste any money he makes.

to all those silly boys running their mouths, understand this - unless a woman is ugly as sin, she usually has multiple suitors. so she has made a choice to be with you. some of you are the same ones that will wail if the lady leaves you for the security/comfort of a fellow who is already made.

https://jezebel.com/10-years-of-kanye-wests-women-and-the-music-they-inspi-1520099391

Today is the tenth anniversary of Kanye West’s 2004 debut album The College Dropout and while it's a great work, I couldn’t help but think of the women West dated before settling down with Kim Kardashian. Why? Well, he’s the kind of MC whose music is directly affected by his love affairs. Like Diego Rivera, Marvin Gaye or Justin Timberlake, whatever is happening in his heart is happening in his art.


Sumeke Rainey

Sumeke Rainey, on the right in the photo above, is Kanye’s first girlfriend. She split the buffet with him at that Chicago KFC when he was a nobody. Guys, that’s love. Unfortunately, though Kanye promised her father on his death bed that he’d marry Sumeke, the up-and-coming MC did not follow though. Listen, it’s hard to stay monogamous when you finally become famous and can stop shouting down people who doubt your genius.

Sure enough, I sent the plane tickets
but when she came to kick it, things became different
Any girl I cheated on, sheets I skeeted on
Couldn't keep it at home, thought I needed a Nia Long - "Touch The Sky"

I'm guessing Sumeke probably feels like she got the better end of that deal.

I see no problem here. You guys weren't married to begin with.
You took a risk and lost.
The best decision is the one taken because you wanted to and
not out of fear of what people will say.

Are u single or u re still with ur liability.?

Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.

makydebbie:
Lemme read.

Awwn sister this is sad. I believe it's a blessing in disguise, imagine if it was your money that was squandered that way..?

The fact that it worked for couple A doesn't mean it'll work for couple B. Some guys are worth the risk, while some ain't.

God bless you for this sis.
Its a norm that couple A might stick together from start to end while couple B might start when the going gets sweet and still live happily. But all in all, follow your heart and allow your inner self lead you. Get someone that plans with you, dreams with you and sees you as an investment he needs to protect all his life. Also make sure you stay strong in faithfulness and build his trust in you.
God bless us all

poik:




Come easy, go easy.

Prov 30:11Proverbs 13:11 (KJV) Wealth gotten by vanity shall be diminished: but he that gathereth by labour shall increase.


Its not him; its the spirit behind gambling.

Bet money no be easy money o. you know since when the guy don deh play? The guys problems is that he likes to jolificate.
@op, pls dont give him another chance o.

GraGra247:
In some relationships your efforts pays off big time, while some other do not.

You can't conclude that all efforts fail just because yours failed.

if you bothered to read, you would notice she never said that

He words were "for every one man who remains with the woman that stood by him, hundred more left"

HeWrites:


Neither do you

where are you two from? Nkpo nse abah o

Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.

I know you mist have gone through hell bit that does not mean your story is true for all men

Stop dating poor guys...
Poor guys behavior are never real till they make it...you will see the real him.

What if is 1billion...

You will never hear from him again ...

Missali:
One of the qualities men look out out for in a woman is the ability for her to stay true by him during trying times and a woman who cannot do that is termed a non wife material and slay Queen at best and at worst, a gold digger.
It is believed that when a woman supports her man and he comes to, in turn he will respect her and share responsibilities as he should but often times, this is not the case.

Many at times we have heard experiences from family, friends, colleagues or even gone through it.
Here's mine: I had this boyfriend that was struggling in every sense of the word. We kept on despite his financial shortcomings and I would travel a long distance to see him knowing fully well that the trip expenses and all that came with it were on me. I did not hesitate to oblige favours that I could give and ensured I went out with him during his jobs just to give that moral support.

Things seemed to be going on well until the day I was sitting with some friends and one of them asked how I was enjoying with my boyfriend. I responded with a light laugh and he asked "now that your guy has made it, what is the way forward?"

Me: Made it how?
Guy: Your guy hit over one million in that online betting promo.
Me: Yes yes, it's not easy... Such an unexpected favour at a time like this.

I pretended to be aware and happy but I wasn't myself till the end of the day. Everybody knew the good news except me.
One week, two weeks, one month passed and I got no call from my estranged boyfriend to even tell me what had happened. I refused to call too.

I heard news about how he had become the man about town, declaring free drinks for people he met at our street bars, dashing money to those who came to celebrate with him etc. Whenever someone who knew us sighted me they asked, "are you not M's girlfriend?" and I mumbled any answer that came to mind.
Months later I got a call from him begging to see Me. After many refusals, I decided we meet. He went on his knees apologising, saying he knew I was aware of all that had happened but was too ashamed to contact me. He went on about how he rented an apartment for one girl, was giving out money with reckless abandon, purchased an expensive mobile phone which he ended up selling at an abysmally low price (due to hardship) and how he was popping bottles at bars et al.

The length and breadth of the story was that the money was all gone. The business idea we had brainstormed he made no use of the money to invest. All his friends and girlfriends had left him for good and he felt lonely, he remembered the one who stood by him sincerely.

At the moment he had not a penny, with an empty stomach and looking for a way to get a small job. I could tell he was miserable from his looks alone. If only he had the right company who would have advised him at such a critical time, he'd never have had to go hungry again. I took him to a restaurant and we had a nice meal. He called me a good girl, a loving friend, a confidant blah blah blah.

Ladies, they will come at you with twisted words tell you they want a good woman, a patient woman, a supportive woman etc. Some will even tell you that they can never respect a woman who does not struggle with them. Do not fall for it. Most times, what they want is someone to take their excesses while they move on to cast their net elsewhere. For tens of stories about men who stick by their women when the going got smooth, there are hundreds of untold stories about men who looked the other way.

Playing the supportive role is the case of it may work and it may not. It is not stated anywhere that after standing by him and he leaves for another woman, he will be mobbed. You will simply be remembered as 'the one who once was', that's all.

It is a case of driving into a place with the words "cars parked at owner's risk." Nobody will tell you not to park your car but you hold yourself liable should anything happen to it. Hence, stand by your man at owner's risk.

How dare you judge Nigerian men based on the action of your gambler boyfriend

You don't trust a gambler or keep one as a boyfriend if you want a better future for yourself.

Gambling is a very bad habit!

If your boyfriend is a drunk, a gambler, a chain smoker, then you have no boyfriend, find another one or get a side Boyf for future purpose.

Thank your God for rescuing you from this future mess of a guy. Jesus loves you, smile