I know you all sleeping now. Right now my head is full and I want to pour the content here.

Am going to give details of what transpired between the one I love.

I met her on Facebook sometime last year. Though we live in the same city. She traveled to Abuja for her IT. While chatting, she told me she has been away from relationship for over 3 years cos she doesn't want relationship issues. That relationship is the last thing on her mind.
Well, along the line, we fell for each other. She told me that no sex until marriage and that she won't spent the night in my house. I agreed. Everything was going perfectly well. We were happy and we love each other.

Then she came back. We met. Discus, eat and kiss. She gave me a designer perf she bought for me. She left.
A week later, she called me that she wanna spend the night with me cos she will be traveling to Dubai for Xmas holiday the following week. We spent the night together and she asked me to make love to her. We made love throughout the night. She was happy.

She then traveled to Dubai. While in Dubai, we chat all day till she return back to Nigeria. Then the drama started.

We hardly talk and chat, even when we chats and talk, it was briefed.
She told me she has been busy since she came back. That her aunty nanny and cook traveled for Xmas holiday. She has been the one taking care of her kids and house chores. She kept saying a lot was on her head. Before now, she has complained to me of her aunty giving her much work even when the nanny and cook were around.

This evening when I try to talk about her recent attitude of distancing herself from me, she said I complain a lot. That a lot is on her head and am not helping issues. That I need attention, but she can't give it to me cos she is going though a lot. That she need to be left alone. That relationship is the last thing on her mind. That we should be causal friends for now.

She will be coming back to PH today

Frankly speaking, those words hurt my heart a lot and am confuse.

Beloved, what's your take on tis

just give her a break bro. maybe she is not feeling the vibe in d relation again or somebody might have taken ur place. give her sometime then go meet her again if she act weird or strange towards u, i wil advice u leave her.

Give her time...

Leave her alone na

It is a subtle way of telling you that she is not interested in you.
Pls understand the coded message and move on

Amarabae:
It is a subtle way of telling you that she is not interested in you.
Pls understand the coded message and move on

Agreed.

Op she doesn't want you again, if you decide to wait...it will till the day the Lord comes.

It may be hard but it's time to move on. You won't die without her and there are billions of females out there. Grip your self esteem and move on.

I luv honest girls, she ask u to leave her alone, and u are complaining;(she is just being honest

she met a better person

Hector09:
I luv honest girls, she ask u to leave her alone, and u are complaining;(she is just being honest

lool..exactly,some people can be too clingy

even when its so glaring ..

Amarabae:
It is a subtle way of telling you that she is not interested in you.
Pls understand the coded message and move on

exactly...one thing i learnt from my nysc relationship some years back, no matter hw busy one is,if d love is der der wld always b time

You met an honest lady but destroyed the relationship through NEEDINESS!

NO, there's no other guy in the equation! She had no time (she explained that to you! ), she gave you little of the time she had (which she didn't even have)

You brought her under pressure through your complains that were fueled by your NEEDINESS! She broke!

Next time, don't act needy! You destroyed this relationship by yourself!

Stop "boyfriending" her, and start "friending" her. Don't ask her questions that relationship folks ask! That would turn her off the more!

Tell her about your day without seeking her attention. Don't be arrogant o. Use text messages more!

She already has a lot to worry about! You made the mistake of "joining" the queue by acting all needy!

Relationships won't break most times if we deal with neediness! You steal meat from the pot and mum sees you, but you didn't know that she did! She has two options: let it slide (and later use sense to talk around it without giving you the slightest indication that she saw you) or call you out (letting you know that she caught you). The second is what most do in relationships! (Not just when it comes to cheating). The consequence of that is a mental switch to "insecure mode" or "I'm fvcked mode" or "guilt mode" in the mind of the one that was called out! They come under pressure! They start feeling that you don't trust them again! The relationship can never be the same again! That's the effect of complaining and calling bluffs in relationships

That's just an analogy that shows how humans react. Just let the pendulum swing once you know that it's properly fixed. . That's what saved Beyoncé's marriage! The pendulum will ALWAYS settle at the equilibrium position.

PS: Don't apply the above to character default! Deal with it rather! The girl's case is not a character default! It's a life default! Life is bound to change mode from time to time!

Newboss:
You met an honest lady but destroyed the relationship through NEEDINESS!

NO, there's no other guy in the equation! She had no time (she explained that to you! ), she gave you little of the time she had (which she didn't even have)

You brought her under pressure through your complains that were fueled by your NEEDINESS! She broke!

Next time, don't act needy! You destroyed this relationship by yourself!

Stop "boyfriending" her, and start "friending" her. Don't ask her questions that relationship folks ask! That would turn her off the more!

Tell her about your day without seeking her attention. Don't be arrogant o. Use text messages more!

She already has a lot to worry about! You made the mistake of "joining" the queue by acting all needy!

Relationships won't break most times if we deal with neediness! You steal meat from the pot and mum sees you, but you didn't know that she did! She has two options: let it slide (and later use sense to talk around it without giving you the slightest indication that she saw you) or call you out (letting you know that she caught you). The second is what most do in relationships! (Not just when it comes to cheating). The consequence of that is a mental switch to "insecure mode" or "I'm fvcked mode" or "guilt mode" in the mind of the one that was called out! They come under pressure! They start feeling that you don't trust them again! The relationship can never be the same again!

That's just an analogy that shows how humans react. Just let the pendulum swing once you know that it's properly fixed. . That's what saved Beyoncé's marriage! The pendulum will ALWAYS settle at the equilibrium position.

PS: Don't apply the above to character default! Deal with it rather! The girl's case is not a character default! It's a life default! Life is bound to change mode from time to time!

Needy. Relationships is indeed complicated. And women are most complicated. Yuu don't even know what they want.
Let me Share u a chat I had with her when she travel to Dubai.

Then I try doing what she said, it now turn to bring needy

with this chat then u lied to us. What i see here is u giving her attitudes cos no one is surpose to keep acting desperate to another for a very long time.

happy200:
with this chat then u lied to us. What i see here is u giving her attitudes cos no one is surpose to keep acting desperate to another for a very long time.

That's what u will say at first glance. You have to know that she wasn't in the country as at then.
So I can't reach her lone. Am not the chatting type. I can be online the whole day without chatting.
But that's what she like.
She love typing than talking.
When she complain, I changed. Started checking her on. Everything was okay then till she return and complain of too much on her head.

I kept chatting and calling. But she kept pushing me aside with the excuses of being too busy.

Was I suppose to let her be when she said she had a lot on her mind.

that's the problem...wen u care too much for ordinary gf, then that will be a problem in most cases..she preferred u wen u were not been clingy

Lashist:
that's the problem...wen u care too much for ordinary gf, then that will be a problem in most cases..she preferred u wen u were not been clingy

I love her and I believed she love me too. Whatever happened along the way is beyond me.
For her to get to a point of terming my care and affection to on as being too clingy and complaining too much means there is a crack somewhere of which she isn't ready to allow it fix

I have decided to give her space and act just casual. Her choice her life. Man gat to move on

she will come around soon, cuz every tin has to be on her terms; u allowed it to happen dat way in d 1st place. i guess luv has its way of throwing its full weight on some two lovers and then splitting itself into two shares that's suppose to b equal like 50-50%. but in ur case; the one with d lesser portion controls d relationship. just tink of ways to tilt d balance or beta still offload a greater feelings of ur luv for her to ur advantages; and act fast. now u get d idea.

Steveboss008:


That's what u will say at first glance. You have to know that she wasn't in the country as at then.
So I can't reach her lone. Am not the chatting type. I can be online the whole day without chatting.
But that's what she like.
She love typing than talking.
When she complain, I changed. Started checking her on. Everything was okay then till she return and complain of too much on her head.

I kept chatting and calling. But she kept pushing me aside with the excuses of being too busy.

Was I suppose to let her be when she said she had a lot on her mind.

ok i understand. just relax she 'll come back she just need time alone when evrything is cool she 'll be back.

I think she is no longer interested in the relationship, move on.

Steveboss008:



Needy. Relationships is indeed complicated. And women are most complicated. Yuu don't even know what they want.
Let me Share u a chat I had with her when she travel to Dubai.

Then I try doing what she said, it now turn to bring needy

Hmmm. I never saw that! You need to just withdraw from her for some time In Dubai, she was damn bored! Now, she's probably got a lot of stuffs doing. Just let her be man!

GameKartel:
she will come around soon, cuz every tin has to be on her terms; u allowed it to happen dat way in d 1st place. i guess luv has its way of throwing its full weight on some two lovers and then splitting itself into two shares that's suppose to b equal like 50-50%. but in ur case; the one with d lesser portion controls d relationship. just tink of ways to tilt d balance or beta still offload a greater feelings of ur luv for her to ur advantages; and act fast. now u get d idea.

You are speaking in parables. Do you mind breaking it into smaller particles

happy200:
ok i understand. just relax she 'll come back she just need time alone when evrything is cool she 'll be back.

When you say relax, do u mean I should cut off from her or just across like a casual friend

Newboss:
Hmmm. I never saw that! You need to just withdraw from her for some time In Dubai, she was damn bored! Now, she's probably got a lot of stuffs doing. Just let her be man!

Let her be. Like I should forget about her and stop talking to her or act like a casual friend

Steveboss008:


When you say relax, do u mean I should cut off from her or just across like a casual friend

Give her like one month space without calls/sms she 'll cool off and remember you. then you can call if she didn't call you. Then i strongly beleive she 'll come back and everything will be back to normal.

Steveboss008:


Let her be. Like I should forget about her and stop talking to her or act like a casual friend

Just bump into her on phone after one week. Yeah, give her one full week, no contacts whatsoever!

Is it that hard for you to let her be?

Mznaett:
Is it that hard for you to let her be?

.

Yiu talk as if serious relationship is like room with two doors where you enter and exit effortlessly.

Well, I have let her be. I found myself comfortably doing things without drifting my mind towards her. Though in some occasions, I remember her.

But am sure am fine

Steveboss008:
I know you all sleeping now. Right now my head is full and I want to pour the content here.

Am going to give details of what transpired between the one I love.

I met her on Facebook sometime last year. Though we live in the same city. She traveled to Abuja for her IT. While chatting, she told me she has been away from relationship for over 3 years cos she doesn't want relationship issues. That relationship is the last thing on her mind.
Well, along the line, we fell for each other. She told me that no sex until marriage and that she won't spent the night in my house. I agreed. Everything was going perfectly well. We were happy and we love each other.

Then she came back. We met. Discus, eat and kiss. She gave me a designer perf she bought for me. She left.
A week later, she called me that she wanna spend the night with me cos she will be traveling to Dubai for Xmas holiday the following week. We spent the night together and she asked me to make love to her. We made love throughout the night. She was happy.

She then traveled to Dubai. While in Dubai, we chat all day till she return back to Nigeria. Then the drama started.

We hardly talk and chat, even when we chats and talk, it was briefed.
She told me she has been busy since she came back. That her aunty nanny and cook traveled for Xmas holiday. She has been the one taking care of her kids and house chores. She kept saying a lot was on her head. Before now, she has complained to me of her aunty giving her much work even when the nanny and cook were around.

This evening when I try to talk about her recent attitude of distancing herself from me, she said I complain a lot. That a lot is on her head and am not helping issues. That I need attention, but she can't give it to me cos she is going though a lot. That she need to be left alone. That relationship is the last thing on her mind. That we should be causal friends for now.

She will be coming back to PH today

Frankly speaking, those words hurt my heart a lot and am confuse.

Beloved, what's your take on tis

It seem ur so in love wit her,,, how far,are u ready for marriage?