Let hear from our fellow nairalanders

What is the bride's price list for grooms in your hometown?

It is good to know

Cc,lalasticala,myndd44

This thing still dey exist.

In my place, bride price is N1000. After you have paid, the brides father will return N995 to the groom which signifies that he is not selling his daughter to you, hence the need to take appropriate care of her needs.

Aside the logistics in getting married, traditional marriage is very cheap in my place. There is no much requirements as the lists given is affordable.

Ladyhippolyta88:
This thing still dey exist.

It will continue to exist.

mrphysics:

It will continue to exist.

Well maybe in your family but not in my family.And believe me in 50 years time it would be a thing of the past.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Well maybe in your family but not in my family.And believe me in 50 years time it would be a thing of the past.

Lol. There are things that will be things of the past. Your predictions are just verbal predictions, you have not backed it up with facts or academic research.

You might consider going to the villages to see how these traditions are passed from people to people or you allow internet deceive you. I won't argue with you but do know that even in 100 years, it will still remain.

mrphysics:

Lol. There are things that will be things of the past. Your predictions are just verbal predictions, you have not backed it up with facts or academic research.

You might consider going to the villages to see how these traditions are passed from people to people or you allow internet deceive you. I won't argue with you but do know that even in 100 years, it will still remain.

I don't need to go to any village to know thatsome people are complaining about the expensive list and outrageous requirements like I said it won't remain for long and even if it does.It is not paid in my family and some other families that is how it starts.

Ladyhippolyta88:
I don't need to go to any village to know thatsome people are complaining about the expensive list and outrageous requirements like I said it won't remain for long and even if it does.It is not paid in my family and some other families that is how it starts.

There are things you can't stop. I really don't know what your tradition says about bride price. But trust me, though your family may be avoiding those traditions, it does not mean that the vast majority of your people are not paying it. Your family forms just a fractions of the large population of people paying bride price.


You can't modernize this, its not possible

mrphysics:

There are things you can't stop. I really don't know what your tradition says about bride price. But trust me, though your family may be avoiding those traditions, it does not mean that the vast majority of your people are not paying it. Your family forms just a fractions of the large population of people paying bride price.


You can't modernize this, its not possible

Abeg leave me alone I have said my own.Talking like as if culture is static and does not evolve.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Abeg leave me alone I have said my own.Talking like as if culture is static and does not evolve.

I just checked where I held you. You were making a fact-less argument. Speaking authoritatively even when there is no link to your researched papers. For the last 50 years, how has the culture of traditional marriage changed? They can be modifications as knowledge improves but sure, they won't be a stoppage of it. People are eager to pass what was passed to them unto their children. If it gives us identity, then its a culture and we will uphold it.

I really do not know your problem with a moderate bride price. I can take my girl friend out and spend 10 - 15k yet I can't pay N1,000 to officially have access to her? It seems to me that you are just arguing illogically or perhaps not wanting to consider what marriage is after all. Even if you go to registry for marriage, you will still pay about 10 -20k. And so, if we modify some traditional rites in marriages and make it moderate and affordable, then there is nothing wrong with it.

And even if they are not modified, bride price will still be paid.

mrphysics:

I just checked where I held you. You were making a fact-less argument. Speaking authoritatively even when there is no link to your researched papers. For the last 50 years, how has the culture of traditional marriage changed? They can be modifications as knowledge improves but sure, they won't be a stoppage of it. People are eager to pass what was passed to them unto their children. If it gives us identity, then its a culture and we will uphold it.

I really do not know your problem with a moderate bride price. I can take my girl friend out and spend 10 - 15k yet I can't pay N1,000 to officially have access to her? It seems to me that you are just arguing illogically or perhaps not wanting to consider what marriage is after all. Even if you go to registry for marriage, you will still pay about 10 -20k. And so, if we modify some traditional rites in marriages and make it moderate and affordable, then there is nothing wrong with it.

And even if they are not modified, bride price will still be paid.

Read what I said before it is your own cup of tea.Maybe to you it is not wrong but to others it is and those others have done what they see fit so it is your problem not mine.Everything is constant to change simple as ABC.

mrphysics:

I just checked where I held you. You were making a fact-less argument. Speaking authoritatively even when there is no link to your researched papers. For the last 50 years, how has the culture of traditional marriage changed? They can be modifications as knowledge improves but sure, they won't be a stoppage of it. People are eager to pass what was passed to them unto their children. If it gives us identity, then its a culture and we will uphold it.

I really do not know your problem with a moderate bride price. I can take my girl friend out and spend 10 - 15k yet I can't pay N1,000 to officially have access to her? It seems to me that you are just arguing illogically or perhaps not wanting to consider what marriage is after all. Even if you go to registry for marriage, you will still pay about 10 -20k. And so, if we modify some traditional rites in marriages and make it moderate and affordable, then there is nothing wrong with it.

And even if they are not modified, bride price will still be paid.

Read what I said before it is your own cup of tea.Maybe to you it is not wrong but to others it is and those others have done what they see fit so it is your problem not mine.Everything is constant to change simple as ABC and my stance are not factless.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Read what I said before it is your own cup of tea.Maybe to you it is not wrong but to others it is and those others have done what they see fit so it is your problem not mine.Everything is constant to change simple as ABC.

Are we talking about each others problem here?

More like a ranting posts you have been making. Do you reside in Benue? Wonder what is going on over there.

mrphysics:

Are we talking about each others problem here?

More like a ranting posts you have been making. Do you reside in Benue? Wonder what is going on over there.

If you are interested in Benue matters you can go there and find out.

Ladyhippolyta88:
If you are interested in Benue matters you can go there and find out.

I was asking because it seems over there you are is boiling hence your response. Anyway shaa, what do I know and who do I know self.

mrphysics:

I was asking because it seems over there you are is boiling hence your response. Anyway shaa, what do I know and who do I know self.

You know a lot but we don't seem to agree on this one.Sorry if I sounded rude.We all have different opinions I never wanted to offend anybody but I was angry at your constant mentions.Eitherway I am sorry,you have your opinion and I have mine.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Sorry if I sounded rude.We all have different opinions I never wanted to offend anybody but I was angry at your constant mentions.Either I am sorry you have your opinion and I have mine.

Okies, no problem. This is a public forum and everyone can be mentioned with or without their approval. Its then your choice who to reply or ignore. You should have ignored my broke brain. Anyway, we all have opinions and even at that, our opinions can be challenged or even flawed.

mrphysics:


Okies, no problem. This is a public forum and everyone can be mentioned with or without their approval. Its then your choice who to reply or ignore. You should have ignored my broke brain. Anyway, we all have opinions and even at that, our opinions can be challenged or even flawed.

True,but hope you are not angry?Your brain isn't broke.

Ladyhippolyta88:
True,but hope you are not angry?Your brain isn't broke.

No nah, not angry shaa. Went through your profile, you are active in politics section. CNN, Trump, etc. So anyone that must have opinion there must wear a thick skin, perhaps you have done that.

But don't you think they are some traditions, cultures, values etc that we should preserve. The west is not trying to be us, so why are we trying to be them. I think what stands North Korea is their zeal in defining how they should be seen regardless of worlds opinion on them.

China is building a unique value and these days, they offer scholarships taught in their language as a way to preserve their cultural heritage. We need one and I think bride price is one. It's not by the value or price but the super meaning it carries. It makes both parties understand that the new relationship is one. And both tries to enjoy the mutual relationship. I strongly think its good.

mrphysics:


No nah, not angry shaa. Went through your profile, you are active in politics section. CNN, Trump, etc. So anyone that must have opinion there must wear a thick skin, perhaps you have done that.

But don't you think they are some traditions, cultures, values etc that we should preserve. The west is not trying to be us, so why are we trying to be them. I think what stands North Korea is their zeal in defining how they should be seen regardless of worlds opinion on them.

China is building a unique value and these days, they offer scholarships taught in their language as a way to preserve their cultural heritage. We need one and I think bride price is one. It's not by the value or price but the super meaning it carries. It makes both parties understand that the new relationship is one. And both tries to enjoy the mutual relationship. I strongly think its good.

Personally I don't support the brideprice but I believe there are some African cultures that are archaic and some still seem relevant and I enjoy the masquerade festivals in my hometown that one should remain.Yes every country should have it's own unique identity but I believe if you see something good from others it is not a crime if you embrace such just like how Nigeria a country known for it's traditions has identified with secularism and democracy.Leaving some of our archaic traditional mentality does not stop us from adding new ones and I love the indigenous foods and languages those one's to me still have a place.

Ladyhippolyta88:
Personally I don't support the brideprice but I believe there are some African cultures that are archaic and some still seem relevant and I enjoy the masquerade festivals in my hometown that one should remain.Yes every country should have it's own unique identity but I believe if you see something good from others it is not a crime if you embrace such just like how Nigeria a country known for it's traditions has identified with secularism and democracy.Leaving some of our archaic traditional mentality does not stop us from adding new ones and I love the indigenous foods and languages those one's to me still have a place.

In Enugu, masquerades are used to extort money from passerbys and not for tradition. You can see small children wearing some face mask and calling themselves masquerades. The big ones flog you, damage your car if you fail to give them money. Such should be removed or moderated/controlled.

Bride price aside being high in some places has no negative aspect. Like I stated above, it is N1000 while the ladies father returns N995, leaving the price at N5. What makes traditional marriages costly is the logistics, the packaging and other things. Marriage list in my place isn't costly at all.

Nigeria has not copied anything correctly from any country. And yes, we can retain our food, language, etc.

mrphysics:


In Enugu, masquerades are used to extort money from passerbys and not for tradition. You can see small children wearing some face mask and calling themselves masquerades. The big ones flog you, damage your car if you fail to give them money. Such should be removed or moderated/controlled.

Bride price aside being high in some places has no negative aspect. Like I stated above, it is N1000 while the ladies father returns N995, leaving the price at N5. What makes traditional marriages costly is the logistics, the packaging and other things. Marriage list in my place isn't costly at all.

Nigeria has not copied anything correctly from any country. And yes, we can retain our food, language, etc.

My village masquerade does not extort he only goes to houses to ask for money even our age grades do same for the festival after that and on the last day they buy a goat.Nigerians like expensive things must you invite everybody to your wedding there are some things you can always do to save yourself unnecessary frivolities.T me brideprice has a negative effect it simply shows you are buying the woman and to me no amount of money can buy the worth of a human being.

Ladyhippolyta88:
My village masquerade does not extort he only goes to houses to ask for money even our age grades do same for the festival after that and on the last day they buy a goat.Nigerians like expensive things must you invite everybody to your wedding there are some things you can always do to save yourself unnecessary frivolities.T me brideprice has a negative effect it simply shows you are buying the woman and to me no amount of money can buy the worth of a human being.

Bride price does not show that you are buying her. It signifies value. Its the value that it portrays that matters.

For instance in my place, you end up giving N5 for the bride price. The official price is N1000, while N995 is given back to you. So how does N5 show signifies buying a woman.

In as much as the masquerade goes about collecting money, then it should be removed.

mrphysics:

Bride price does not show that you are buying her. It signifies value. Its the value that it portrays that matters.

For instance in my place, you end up giving N5 for the bride price. The official price is N1000, while N995 is given back to you. So how does N5 show signifies buying a woman.

In as much as the masquerade goes about collecting money, then it should be removed.

You are buying her,brideprice was initiated at a time when women were seen as commodities if it isn't wrong then let us start paying groom price.

Ladyhippolyta88:
You are buying her,brideprice was initiated at a time when women were seen as commodities if it isn't wrong then let us start paying groom price.

How it was initiated doesn't matter. Just like Christmas which was founded on some historical ceremonies and made to replace people going to commit sin.

Like I said, the value and the meaning is what matters. Secondly, you can't pay groom price because the price you pay is being under the man. Answering his name, having to carry pregnancy for 9 months and nurse the babe for 6 months. Isn't that enough price being paid by women.

If I were you guys, I would even advocate increment on the price considering the huge sacrifice you guys go through. Think about this

mrphysics:

How it was initiated doesn't matter. Just like Christmas which was founded on some historical ceremonies and made to replace people going to commit sin.

Like I said, the value and the meaning is what matters. Secondly, you can't pay groom price because the price you pay is being under the man. Answering his name, having to carry pregnancy for 9 months and nurse the babe for 6 months. Isn't that enough price being paid by women.

If I were you guys, I would even advocate increment on the price considering the huge sacrifice you guys go through. Think about this

Nobody is paying for me advocate for other women but that advocacy is not with my family.I don't need to know my worth or value with money I am not under any man including my husband,I am his partner not his subordinate so I am not under him answering his name is if I like it is my choice to make.

Lonestar124:
Let hear from our fellow nairalanders

What is the bride's price list for grooms in your hometown?

It is good to know

Cc,lalasticala,myndd44

pls check ur email, I have been trying to reach you on your WhatsApp but I can't find you. I noticed I can't make any comment on my post, I also tried calling the number you dropped but it isn't connecting

mrphysics:
In my place, bride price is N1000. After you have paid, the brides father will return N995 to the groom which signifies that he is not selling his daughter to you, hence the need to take appropriate care of her needs.

Aside the logistics in getting married, traditional marriage is very cheap in my place. There is no much requirements as the lists given is affordable.

I guess u are from the north

Ladyhippolyta88:
Nobody is paying for me advocate for other women but that advocacy is not with my family.I don't need to know my worth or value with money I am not under any man including my husband,I am his partner not his subordinate so I am not under him answering his name is if I like it is my choice to make.

feminist spotted...
different folks for strokes...