sarrki:
Aside the Fulani crisis that its been sorted out

Also the cabals

I think he's one of the best

True 100%

Best in corruption, nepotism, incompetence, failure etc

Rigel95:
Nigerians don't read faam...see them calling it sarcasm. Its a satire people!

Oga do you know what satire is??cos I doubt it...pick a dictionary!!!

[quote author=Fukafuka post=64616182][/quote]
Are his mate president, governors,exminister??if not that show how a failure PMB and his generation are...so oga look to your left and tell PMB that he is a failure

Many Nigerians have short memory. That was how they criticized Yar'Adua and called him names such as Baba Go Slow (the same name they would later give to Buhari). But today, many of them are now appreciating Yar'Adua in death.

Buhari as far as I am concerned lost people's goodwill before he was ever elected, people just didn't realised it. He needed to come to power for people eyes to be open to a demoniac that he is, just a soulless human being, incapable of empathizing with others. Cares only for his clique of cronies. He can try to convince otherwise but the evidence against him are overwhelming.

Sapiosexuality:
No, I've not. Wrote Facebook a message because Publishing Tools, which is required to integrate the Instant Articles on my page, is missing on my page. Still waiting to rectify that.

Ok , thanks.....it seems you know the way around it. I got nothing meaningful online o. It is just obscure. Please, can yu show me the way around it?

killsmith:
typical afonja who'll likely spend the whole day shouting "ahhhhhhh owo mi da"...

corrinthians - omenka

12submarine:

Did you read the post at all? Even if you did, pls read it again, this time, between the lines.

Let's donate school fees for him cos he has poor comprehensive skill.

sharpwriter:


Ok , thanks.....it seems you know the way around it. I got nothing meaningful online o. It is just obscure. Please, can yu show me the way around it?

You will first have to sign up with Facebook Instant Articles(https://instantarticles.fb.com/) and choose your Facebook, any page you wish to employ the instant articles for.

Then look for the plugin on WordPress and install. In the course of registration you will be given a code you have to paste into the Plugin you just installed.

You'd also upload five articles for review and after 24-48 hours Facebook allows or rejects it. Then you need the publishing tools to set up and edit the articles.

Note. Any article you upload on your website will automatically be updated on the Instant Article page.

With publishing tools, you edit it, and insert ad codes, then you publish it on your Facebook page.

Note. You also need to download the Facebook Manager app from play store. You can edit and add your bank account details on the instant manager page.

I think you didn't find any info because what I told you that day was Facebook instant messages instead of Facebook Instant Article.

Read these three articles to get a better explanation.

http://socialmediatipz.com/how-to-publish-a-facebook-instant-article/

https://stream-seo.com/make-22000-month-facebook-instant-articles-audience-network/

https://www.technologywindow.com/setup-facebook-instant-articles-wordpress-blog/

Sarcastic and true

Sapiosexuality:
You will first have to sign up with Facebook Instant Articles(https://instantarticles.fb.com/) and choose your Facebook, any page you wish to employ the instant articles for.

Then look for the plugin on WordPress and install. In the course of registration you will be given a code you have to paste into the Plugin you just installed.

You'd also upload five articles for review and after 24-48 hours Facebook allows or rejects it. Then you need the publishing tools to set up and edit the articles.

Note. Any article you upload on your website will automatically be updated on the Instant Article page.

With publishing tools, you edit it, and insert ad codes, then you publish it on your Facebook page.

Note. You also need to download the Facebook Manager app from play store. You can edit and add your bank account details on the instant manager page.

I think you didn't find any info because what I told you that day was Facebook instant messages instead of Facebook Instant Article.

Read these three articles to get a better explanation.

http://socialmediatipz.com/how-to-publish-a-facebook-instant-article/

https://stream-seo.com/make-22000-month-facebook-instant-articles-audience-network/

https://www.technologywindow.com/setup-facebook-instant-articles-wordpress-blog/

Wowww....Thanks a lot bro. You have been of help... na yur likes we want for nairaland I will check out those links. God bless.

sharpwriter:



Wowww....Thanks a lot bro. You have been of help... na yur likes we want for nairaland I will check out those links. God bless.

You are welcome.

I really really enjoyed reading this, i just remembered Animal farm by George O'Weill. great scarcasm

My own is very simple on dis Buhari issue...
Am jus waiting for the winches and winzards of APC village to do lure Dem into a CONVENTION..
Na from dia e go finish for Dem.. Na dis u ho see wetin Dem dey call aggrieved members.. Fresh PDP Na play ooo. APC breakup go worse pass tower of babel...
Imogine all d new PDP guy like saraki.kwakwasiya feel aggrieved,Na to do wetin Dem do pdp bfor nah.. Na y tinubu Neva stik his neck b dat.. Tsunami is coming soon

Adekdammy:


Tell me what have you gained from pmb?

What has the yoruba nation gained from this govt?

Do you know the number of jobless folks on the street of lagos alone?

Do you know that several churches are now doing welfare every Sunday so that some members can be fine?

Sir, since Buhari came on board, hunger is now walking naked before he was tying wrapper but now unclad.

That some of us are still where we are Ia by God's grace and mercy.

Good morning.

At the least they have the vice Presidency...with additional promise for presidency after Buhari even after Obasanjo had ruled for complete eight years

At least they have the juicy portfolios... Fashola (okurin meta) having three ministries under him alone

The more reason TINUBU can never see anything wrong in the alliance so long as it favours him and his gang

beejaay:

Oga do you know what satire is??cos I doubt it...pick a dictionary!!!

lol don't embarrass yourself now. sarcasm was employed in the writeup, but the whole body is a satire. Just a tyre is a part of a vehicle but object that conveys cannot be called a tyre. You grab?

Rigel95:

lol don't embarrass yourself now. sarcasm was employed in the writeup, but the whole body is a satire. Just a tyre is a part of a vehicle but object that conveys cannot be called a tyre. You grab?

Bro don't bother schooling the dude.not every1 that has data in their mobile phone or tablets that spill trash on nairaland is learned....

sarrki:
Aside the Fulani crisis that its been sorted out

Also the cabals

I think he's one of the best

With all due respect,

I read something here on nairaland sometime ago when you wrote that you will never support any politician
I was actually suprised
Lately it seems you changed your mind

What actually happened sir?

12submarine:

Did you read the post at all? Even if you did, pls read it again, this time, between the lines.

He is too stupid to understand sarcasm. It is wasted on his type.

beejaay:

Are his mate president, governors,exminister??if not that show how a failure PMB and his generation are...so oga look to your left and tell PMB that he is a failure

Rigel95:
Nigerians don't read faam...see them calling it sarcasm. Its a satire people!

I hope you really know what satire is...

HungerBAD:
Nigeria do not deserve President Muhammadu Buhari. He should leave us to our fate. Nigerians do not seem to realise when someone is doing a lot for them, and to top the list of the many heinous sins of Nigerians is our impatience…very impatient set of humans.

The impatience is so conspicuous that even the President was forced to call us out on national television during his new year broadcast. Poor Buhari, he has been bludgeoned left, right and centre, even by his Mrs.

As regards the matter with this Fulani Hell’s men…sorry. I mean to write herdsmen, this cranky antiquated computer sometimes seem to have a mind of its own and I have no control over it, just like ‘some’ people are accusing the Commander in Chief of the federal republic of Nigeria of not having any control over his gun-totting kinsmen.


Some even called him out for not ensuring the arrest of the spokesman for the Miyetti Allah who admitted that the 74 souls that were snatched in their sleep were in retaliation for 800 stolen cows.

Nigerians sha. Very funny people. How dare them! Of course, he has control over them. He is General Buhari, remember? Go and ask IPOB and everybody ‘unfortunate’ enough to be in their vicinity, as the military spared nothing to trample, subdue and suppress them without sparing any life in the onslaught.

Some argue that they were armless citizens exercising their freedom of expression and right to self determination as espoused by the UN charter on self determination…story story…Baba says they are terrorists and so it is, they are a threat to our compulsory concatenation as a “united” country.

However, the Fulani herdsmen cannot be terrorists, far from it. How can you call someone trying to feed his cow a terrorist, even if it involves obliterating an entire village to do that! Cows are a special creation of God, much more special than human beings. What’s a human life compared to a cow? A cow! Do we even realise the sanctity of their existence? Ask Indians. A cow has every right to eat your crops and could even take a stroll into your sitting and excrete on your expensive centre rug. Every farmer should realise that the volume of their harvest is at the mercy of the mighty cow.


A herdsman could decide to allow his cattle decimate an entire farm land and anybody who as much raise their voices in protest should be gunned with an Ak47 or hacked to death or better still roasted and allowed to serve as manure for the crops the cattle would come back to eat.

This is why the herders, from Benue to Kaduna to Oyo to Delta State are out with their one million naira Ak47 rifles (Don’t ask where they are getting those expensive weapons from, must you know everything? Aproko) are terminating the continuation of an entire lineage, killing, maiming, burning and matcheting humans...those lowly humans.

And now some mischievous folks - because of Buhari’s ascendancy to the hallowed position  as Nigeria’s number one citizen with a no-where-to-be-found certificate while they, with all their doctorates degrees and endless sojourn at the ivory towers are not anywhere near the seat - are criticising Buhari for not taking a decisive step against these herders like he did to IPOB. They are accusing the GCFR of ethnic solipsism, refusing to factor in the fact that the president himself, like his gun totting kinsmen appreciates the value of a cow. He understands the actions of the herders and empthasizes with them: their travails and their ideology.

He has over a hundred cows in his hometown...and well, I know some merchants of mischief would say that he has had those cows ever since the days of the Great Flood, claiming these cattle never seem to increase or decrease in number; but then Buhari does not owe anybody any explanation for the state of his pastoral enterprise now, does he?

These same Nigerians accusing the GCFR of ethnic solipsism even expected him to visit Benue to commiserate with the victims and families of those who died from the tragic New Year massacre. Will his visit bring them back? How many funerals can he attend? Must he copy presidents of other countries in the world? Moreover, he was busy receiving the seven northern wise men who, out of their love for Nigeria, decided to pay him a visit to encourage their ‘brother’ to contest again in 2019: very deep thinking, sagacious and introspective men.

These ungrateful Nigerians calling on the president to address this contentious issue are still the ones rejecting the idea for a cattle colony, arguing that it is a way of purloining their land and advertently establishing a Fulani empire in guise. What a conspiracy theory! The Fulanis would never do that! That Ottman Dan Fudio repeatedly did does not mean they would.

You just have to trust them. Is mutual trust not one of the pillars of our unity anymore? They even went further in their inscrutable sojourn of obstinacy that the herders should instead set up ranches; investing like every other businesses instead of herding their cows to gnaw and chew away at crops across the country. Imagine, just imagine that. Why would anybody make such outrageous demands?

It is good that, as reported by The Guardian on Monday, January 22, 2018, the Jamatul Nasir Islam (JNI), through its Secretary General, Sheikh Khalid Abubakar that ‘the whole Fulani herdsmen debacle is a coinage “mischievously” invented by the Christian Association of Nigeria in order to heat up the polity in preparation for 2019.

The group even warned the Christian leaders not to take the Nigerian Muslim’s patience for foolishness. Add that to the fact that no major northern leader has expressly condemned the activities of the Fulani herdsmen. Does this not show that these ‘disgruntled’ Nigerians mainly from some sections of the country are merely crying wolf?

As mentioned earlier, Nigerians do not deserve Buhari. This fact is now succinct and clear enough. Buhari should leave Nigerians with our ‘impatience’ and simply return to Daura to fend for his 150 cows. I am pretty sure those poor cows have sorely missed him and would appreciate him more than the impatient 180 million Nigerians. I alongside other true lovers of Buhari will help him make that decision at the polls next year.

Olorunfemi lives in Lagos.

http://guardian.ng/opinion/buhari-a-president-too-good-for-us/

Wow. My yeye article even got posted on Nairaland. Initially thought of posting it here but I know it would have been ignored. My English degree is finally getting properly utilised...
Thanks to those who think it's a nice piece. And for the incurable zombies, we'll definitely remember you in our prayers.

The whole stuff is satirical and it couldn't ve been put in a much better way than the Op has done,good piece anyway...

Ebenezer, dis work is great artistry,& coming from a yoruba man just made my day.Keep writing.U ar blessed.

WAEC English language O level
F9
Dundee repping a dullard
Summary ni comprehension ko

sarrki:
Aside the Fulani crisis that its been sorted out

Also the cabals

I think he's one of the best

Sapiosexuality:
No, I've not. Wrote Facebook a message because Publishing Tools, which is required to integrate the Instant Articles on my page, is missing on my page. Still waiting to rectify that.

Hi bro....how are you? Have yu been able to set up the instant articles? I created a page more than 24 hours ago now. I can't find the page among other pages to choose from for instant articles. What do yu think is happening? I am yet to submit an appeal sha.

sharpwriter:


Hi bro....how are you? Have yu been able to set up the instant articles? I created a page more than 24 hours ago now. I can't find the page among other pages to choose from for instant articles. What do yu think is happening? I am yet to submit an appeal sha.

Okay. That's good. Read this page and tell me what is missing or the problem.

https://www.wpkube.com/setup-facebook-instant-articles-wordpress/

Remember this article

Nice piece

sharpwriter:


Hi bro....how are you? Have yu been able to set up the instant articles? I created a page more than 24 hours ago now. I can't find the page among other pages to choose from for instant articles. What do yu think is happening? I am yet to submit an appeal sha.

Well there can be multiple reason why your site articles are not fetching properly. You can read this guide on Facebook instant articles WordPress which define the whole process step by step. All the best

baldwinjackson:


Well there can be multiple reason why your site articles are not fetching properly. You can read this guide on Facebook instant articles WordPress which define the whole process step by step. All the best

Tnx