missdivineprove:
The Effect Of The Expensive Concept Of Marriage We Have Adopted.

Honestly, I don’t want to post this because I’m not that good in writing, but let me give this a try.

I’ve heard stories from my grand ma how marriage was done during their time. According to her stories, it was simple, interesting and desiring. Quite different from what we do now.

Although I’ve heard people saying marriage ought to be difficult so that the man can value/appreciate the woman, but I doubt if this is true anyway.

Based on my observation, these are the effect of the kind of expensive marriage concept we have adopted. It seems it has enslaved us.

1. High rate of pre marital sex

I am not justifying pre marital sex, but I’m sure the rate of pre marital sex wouldn’t be so high if every marriageable bachelor/spinster can easily get married.
Like that kind of Romeo and Juliet kind of wedding lol.

2. Late marriage

Apart from those who are financial capable, but have no interest in marriage or haven’t met someone of their choice, majority of the youth who are of marriageable age have no means to get married.

3. Marring the wrong person

Sometimes, most especially ladies ended up marring someone who can afford their marriage rite and not someone they really desire to be with.
That’s why some people are married to someone else while they love another person.

4. Poverty

How can a young man keeping working hard, saving his money only for him to spend all that in one day all in the name of marriage? The worst part, after everything, he’ll start all over again but this time, it’s going to get more difficult because more responsibilities have come in.

5. Over rating Marriage

I don’t know how to put this, it’s so annoying the way some takes marriage. Some see marriage as the greatest achievement of their life. Some people’s dream, aspiration, career all come to an end immediately they’re married. Maybe because the cost of marriage is expensive and demanding so it’s being over rated. Knowing that there’s more to life than just marriage

What is your own opinion about this?
Do you think it’s ok so that men could value women more?

If you think it’s not ok, what way forward can you suggest so it could be simpler for everyone to easily achieve without committing crime?
Do you think the media have a role to play in this in educating the people?


Please overlook my typing errors and don't quote my write up. thank you

Memories12411:
My candid advice to the ladies who are craving for elaborate wedding is to use the money to empower their home and watch people coming to leak their feet after gossiping about their low key wedding. Money unnecessarily spent during wedding to impress people who actually don't care.

digitsolution:


you are wise I love your sense of reasoning

radiokilla:
How I wish I can have a low-key wedding. This girl no go gree. Imagine budgeting 800k in this recession and the stuff keeps bloating to over 1mil.

ChidiAlaigbo:


Check well, she loves the wedding not the husband.

tstx:
I will love to post this on my blog listwand.com... Just want to use this medium to ask for permission.

radiokilla:
not really. She will bend to my rules if I insist. But it is her day too and there's need to make her happy. Everyone can't be like me who likes low-key things

missdivineprove:
is her day, so spending all you have and even go ahead to borrow money is what will make her happy? you don't even have enough, you keep saving to impress the society? oh something is wrong with us.

MissRaine69:
Why is the burden of a wedding solely that of a man to bear alone?
You can’t complain that there are no equal rights but shy alway when it matters the most. I have mentioned this before and I will say it again. Some women’s sole focus is the wedding all those hours looking at Bellanaija formulating themes and plans and ideas without actually thinking how all that will be funded. What’s the point of starting married life in heavy debt? The men are to blame too, why are you trying to make out like you have no money worries when you do? If you give her the impression that your pockets are bottomless pits of money then you will be brought to your knees before you are even married.

A wedding is not for likes on social media. Being realistic seems to be an increasingly rare thing these days.

JerryQ:
Op, please how did you get your training? Only wise people think this way. I really need to know you. I want to be a friend, am tripped! So how can we start?

radiokilla:
How I wish I can have a low-key wedding. This girl no go gree. Imagine budgeting 800k in this recession and the stuff keeps bloating to over 1mil.

MRAKBEE:

Are u from there?

judecares1:
yes

missdivineprove:
Lol. just be my friend here. no private chat pls. Thanks

MRAKBEE:

08036118699.wanna know more about urhobo marriage Pls. Chat me up

judecares1:
ok but pls remove ur contact for security reasons

missdivineprove:
Maybe its because most people believed marriage ought to be stressful/difficult on the man side, so that he can value the woman.

IdiAmin2:
BACK IN THE DAYS OF OUR FORE FATHERS, THE BRIDE PRICE PAID IS AN INDICATION AND APPRECIATION FROM THE GROOM'S FAMILY TO TAKE A PURE AND UNTOUCHED WOMAN THAT WAS RAISED IN HONOUR AND TAUGHT TO BE A WIFE AND MOTHER.

THE GROOMS FAMILY PAY A HIGH PRICE INCLUDING LAND SOMETIMES TO THE WIFE'S FAMILY FOR RAISING HER AS A VIRGIN, SO THAT THEY WILL HAVE A PURE VESSEL TO CONTINUE THEIR FAMILY LINEAGE.

BUT NOWADAYS WHERE THE PUZZY HAS BEEN RAN THROUGH BY AT 5 BOYFRIENDS IN SECONDARY SCHOOL;, 5 BOYFRIENDS ON UNI CAMPUS + 2 LECTURERS THAT COLLECTED TO PASS HIS CLASS + 5 MARRIED SUGARDADDIES + 5 BOYFRIENDS WHEN SHE LEAVES UNI INCLUDING THE MANAGER THAT COLLECTED HIS OWN BEFORE HE GAVE HER THE JOB. THAT IS NOT INCLUDING 1 OR 2 ABORTIONS/MISCARRIAGE

AND THEN THEY WILL BE DEMANDING HIGH AMOUNT FOR BRIDE PRICE, AND THE RING MUST COST AT LEAST SO SO AMOUNT, AND THE WEDDING MUST BE BIG.

PLEASE LADIES SHIFT AND PARK WELL ABEG.
MARRY IF YOU WAN MARRY,
BUT THE HIGH DEMANDS ORIGINALLY WAS FOR A PURE VESSEL TO CONTINUE THE GROOMS FAMILY LINEAGE. TIMES HAVE CHANGED

Ginaz:
The day for introduction would be my traditional marriage. After that I and my husband with friends and family only would head to the court to get our marriage certificate. And I move into my marital house.

Or

After making an introduction between both families, we head to the court (just family) then later fixed a date for the traditional marriage only.

But I'm choosing the first option...if only I see a man that would agree with me and don't try to shift it to his way.

My mom is a party woman, she pulls crowd. She might just be the only problem I have. Who cares about a big wedding, not me. I do things my way fuccck society.

Apart from eating to their satisfaction, and filling up the chairs what else do they bring? And it's not everybody that will even be happy for you.

DamZik:

Wedding is overrated.