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Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? - Romance - Nairaland

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Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 11:17am On Mar 11, 2018
You have a partner, He/She cheated on you, after much begging and pleading, you decide to accept Him/Her back. Is that mental strength or just a weakness for the cheat.


What d'you guys think?

2 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by internationalman(m): 11:29am On Mar 11, 2018
Both the cheater, the cheatee and the OP which in this case is the cheater are all weak...

Even if a thief spent 10 years in jail for stealing, when released from jail he's still going back to stealing.

20 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by QueenSuccubus(f): 11:30am On Mar 11, 2018
angry angry

Who forgive a cheater in the first place? If he's proven guilty...he can fuxx himself...

*spits*

3 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by donstan18: 11:31am On Mar 11, 2018
internationalman:
Both the cheater, the cheatee and the OP which in this case is the cheater are all weak...

Even if a thief spent 10 years in jail for stealing, when released from jail he's still going back to stealing.

Lies brO...Lies.



How about "Second chance"?

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by highqueen(f): 11:33am On Mar 11, 2018
I can't deal..I don't have strength to fight ..

2 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by internationalman(m): 11:35am On Mar 11, 2018
donstan18:


Lies brO...Lies.



How about "Second chance"?

The moment you start giving him/her second chances just know that next time there will always be next time.

People don't change, they only adjust their method of operation.

61 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by northvietnam(m): 11:35am On Mar 11, 2018
i will accept her back and propose to her.. After 5years i will still Dump her sorry Ass for cheating on me...

*NO JOY*

5 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by donstan18: 11:36am On Mar 11, 2018
QueenSuccubus:
angry angry

Who forgive a cheater in the first place? If he's proven guilty ...he can fuxx himself...

*spits*

@Bolded , I don't understand.

Can a cheater possibly end up not proven guilty?

2 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by donstan18: 11:38am On Mar 11, 2018
internationalman:

The moment you start giving him/her second chances just know that next time there will always be next time.

People don't change, they only adjust their method of operation.

You have a point.

But don't you think your partner either man/ woman can sometimes be responsible for your infidelity

1 Like

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by internationalman(m): 11:44am On Mar 11, 2018
donstan18:


You have a point.

But don't you think your partner either man/ woman can sometimes be responsible for your infidelity
Yeas of course.

But I thought we were just talking about forgiving a cheater and not the reason they cheat.

You should create another thread for 'the Reason people cheat'

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by QueenSuccubus(f): 11:44am On Mar 11, 2018
donstan18:


@Bolded , I don't understand.

Can a cheater possibly end up not proven guilty?


Only wise ppol can understand, apparently... cool
Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by LordKO(m): 11:45am On Mar 11, 2018
Actually, compassion isn't a sign of weakness (it takes a compassionate person to forgive) - so, forgiveness isn't a sign of weakness but that of strength. However, condonement of a moral or emotional vice is a sure sign of weakness, therefore, accepting him/her back may not mean that you're being compassionate towards him rather it may mean that you're condoning his moral vice - except he cheated once and likely the last and did so under a circumstance beyond his personal control, accepting him back isn't an option.

Believe you me that moral vices, as malleable as they can be, are incurable.

Personally, I'd rather put up with a lady with psychological vice like conceitedness, rather than to put up with one with either emotional vice like irrationality or a moral vice like disingenuousness. . . yes, it takes an irrational or disingenuous person to cheat not just once and under circumstance beyond personal control but continually.

25 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by donstan18: 11:47am On Mar 11, 2018
QueenSuccubus:


Only wise ppol can understand, apparently... cool
So tell us, since I'm not wise.
I believe some other viewers will want to know.
Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by donstan18: 11:51am On Mar 11, 2018
internationalman:

Yeas of course.

But I thought we were just talking about forgiving a cheater and not the reason they cheat.

You should create another thread for 'the Reason people cheat'

There's a correlation there.

If you are the reason or responsible for your partner's infidelity, you might be convinced to forgive him/her since you caused it.

Do you now understand why I typed about the reasons of cheating?

2 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by toro92: 12:13pm On Mar 11, 2018
northvietnam:
i will accept her back and propose to her.. After 5years i will still Dump her sorry Ass for cheating on me...

*NO JOY*
Were re o smiley

3 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by PrimadonnaO(f): 12:21pm On Mar 11, 2018
Is it strength when you tolerate rubbish?

I really don't know if I can continue to be with a cheating partner. Never had to test it.

I'm sure that's what you meant to ask @bolded. You can forgive a person yet choose to not be further associated with them.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Amarabae(f): 12:27pm On Mar 11, 2018
I hate anything cheating with passion.
The cheat can catch an std outside, then come back home and infect his/her spouse.
It's horrible

8 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by CAPSLOCKED: 12:43pm On Mar 11, 2018
QueenSuccubus:
angry angry

Who forgive a cheater in the first place? If he's proven guilty...he can fuxx himself...

*spits*
northvietnam:
i will accept her back and propose to her.. After 5years i will still Dump her sorry Ass for cheating on me...

*NO JOY*



THE WORLD WOULDN'T HAVE SURVIVED THIS LONG IF WE HAVE MORE PEOPLE LIKE YOU, THAN PEOPLE WHO ARE STRONG ENOUGH AND WILLING TO FORGIVE, ACCEPT, AND GIVE ONE ANOTHER SECOND, THIRD, AND MANY MORE CHANCES. smiley

4 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 12:43pm On Mar 11, 2018
Of course i had forgive her.who am i to say i won't forgive my fellow human being...after all we ain't perfect. I will forgive her frm the depths of my heart but then i will move on.

6 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by northvietnam(m): 12:55pm On Mar 11, 2018
CAPSLOCKED:





THE WORLD WOULDN'T HAVE SURVIVED THIS LONG IF WE HAVE MORE PEOPLE LIKE YOU, THAN PEOPLE WHO ARE STRONG ENOUGH AND WILLING TO FORGIVE, ACCEPT, AND GIVE ONE ANOTHER SECOND, THIRD, AND MANY MORE CHANCES. smiley


I know but it Aches the spirit and Soul when u leave every girl on Earth and devote ur body,time,finances just for Her...

What do u get in return... men its so painful and i cant forgive such betrayal...

NEVER

3 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 1:03pm On Mar 11, 2018
The great Nelson Mandela once said it takes courage to forgive those who have wronged you, when questioned about his change of heart towards the Apartheid government in south Africa after his release from prison.

"courageous people do not fear to forgive for the sake of peace"

Forgiveness is always a sign of strength because it shows readiness to make your heart vulnerable for the same person who might have wronged you. It is also a sign of maturity

On the other the hand, those who refuse to forgive are weak at heart because they are not ready to feel vulnerable for those that have wronged them in the past.
Although, they might possess a strong exterior.

Forgetting what happened is another thing entirely, It takes grace and time for that to happen

11 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by XhosaNostra(f): 1:12pm On Mar 11, 2018
Weakness. If cheating is a deal breaker for you, nobody should be above your principles. If you do forgive them for whatever reason, it means you think with your heart. You let "love" cloud your clear judgment & blind you from your strongly held personal beliefs. Strength is when you cut someone you love loose if they dare to test your boundaries.

18 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by modik(m): 1:25pm On Mar 11, 2018
greiboy:
The great Nelson Mandela once said it takes courage to forgive those who have wronged you, when questioned about his change of heart towards the Apartheid government in south Africa after his release from prison.

"courageous people do not fear to forgive for the sake of peace"

Forgiveness is always a sign of strength because it shows readiness to make your heart vulnerable for the same person who might have wronged you. It is also a sign of maturity

On the other the hand, those who refuse to forgive are weak at heart because they are not ready to feel vulnerable for those that have wronged them in the past.
Although, they might possess a strong exterior.

Forgetting what happened is another thing entirely, It takes grace and time for that to happen

Of all the response sonfar, yours stands out.

I Positively align with you.

4 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 2:30pm On Mar 11, 2018
internationalman:
Both the cheater, the cheatee and the OP which in this case is the cheater are all weak...

Even if a thief spent 10 years in jail for stealing, when released from jail he's still going back to stealing.
northvietnam:
i will accept her back and propose to her.. After 5years i will still Dump her sorry Ass for cheating on me...

*NO JOY*

I didn't ask if you can forgive a cheat. angry Read and comprehend the question please. sad
Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 2:32pm On Mar 11, 2018
LordKO:
Actually, compassion isn't a sign of weakness (it takes a compassionate person to forgive) - so, forgiveness isn't a sign of weakness but that of strength. However, condonement of a moral or emotional vice is a sure sign of weakness. Therefore, accepting him/her back may not mean that you're being compassionate towards him rather it may mean that you're condoning his moral vice - except he cheated once and likely the last and did so under a circumstance beyond his personal control, then, accepting him back isn't an option.

Believe you me that moral vices, as malleable as they can be, are incurable.

Personally, I'd rather put up with a lady with psychological vice like conceit rather than to put up with one with either emotional vice like irrationality or a moral vice like disingenuousness. . . yes, it takes an irrational or disingenuous person to cheat, not just once and under circumstance beyond personal control, but continually.

Basically, what you're saying is : Forgiving a cheat, like complete forgiveness and then moving on is a sign of emotional strength, but continuing with a cheat is a sign of weakness?

1 Like

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 2:34pm On Mar 11, 2018
Interesting responses so far. smiley

Both sides arguing convincingly gringrin Me sef don confuse now

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by XhosaNostra(f): 2:41pm On Mar 11, 2018
greiboy:
The great Nelson Mandela once said it takes courage to forgive those who have wronged you, when questioned about his change of heart towards the Apartheid government in south Africa after his release from prison.

"courageous people do not fear to forgive for the sake of peace"

Forgiveness is always a sign of strength because it shows readiness to make your heart vulnerable for the same person who might have wronged you. It is also a sign of maturity

On the other the hand, those who refuse to forgive are weak at heart because they are not ready to feel vulnerable for those that have wronged them in the past.
Although, they might possess a strong exterior.

Forgetting what happened is another thing entirely, It takes grace and time for that to happen

His wife cheated on him while he was imprisoned, when he came out & heard the news, he divorced her. Everyone has personal boundaries they don't want crossed. You can forgive, doesn't mean you have to stick around for the disrespect. It's easier to forgive people who mean nothing to you, than someone you gave your heart to.

21 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 3:09pm On Mar 11, 2018
XhosaNostra:


His wife cheated on him while he was imprisoned, when he came out & heard the news, he divorced her. Everyone has personal boundaries they don't want crossed. You can forgive, doesn't mean you have to stick around for the disrespect.
Although he never accepted that allegations that he divorced her because of the cheating. He claimed his wife was becoming too radical and had a different view of the struggle. The wife also corroborated the story by saying Mandela became too soft after he came out of prison

He claimed he forgave her for the cheating.

2 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by northvietnam(m): 3:12pm On Mar 11, 2018
Criis:


I didn't ask if you can forgive a cheat. angry Read and comprehend the question please. sad

I just told u what i will do...
Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by XhosaNostra(f): 3:17pm On Mar 11, 2018
greiboy:
Although he never accepted that allegations that he divorced him because of the cheating. He claimed his wife was becoming too radical and had a different view of the struggle. The wife also corroborated the story by saying Mandela became too soft after he came out of prison

He claimed he forgave her for the cheating.

It's not by coincidence that the divorce came right after the revelation of her affairs. One of which was with someone he knew.

Yeah right. He removed her from his will. So much for forgiveness. Until recently, she was still fighting in the courts because she was bitter he left her out & got even with her in the end.

8 Likes

Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by Nobody: 3:17pm On Mar 11, 2018
God grants forgiveness, I don't. undecided grin
Re: Is Accepting A Cheat Back Strength Or Weakness? by tosyne2much(m): 3:19pm On Mar 11, 2018
I have cheated on her before and she accepted me back (though the cheating was at the elementary stage) cheesy


I think it's strength on her path to actually forgive me. Ever since then, I don sit tight sha cheesy

5 Likes

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