There's is still girl I met some months ago....we rap up sha, we became good friends(such that she calls me her bestie)....but my defences broke down that I was now catching feelings sha....I told her about the way I felt....but what she said broke my heart.....said we dating can never work out. But we still see and Hangout

The question is what's next?.....Shoulda just let go or keep trying cuz I still dey catch feelings wey she no dey throw to me


Base on you romancelander experience what other scopes and strategies can u advice.

Give her some space...she has 'friendzoned' u. It will only take time, strategy & sacrifice before she can be urs...the question is: are u ready to put in all that resources to have her, is she worth it?

we became good friends(such that she calls me her bestie)

...Shoulda just let go or keep trying cuz I still dey catch feelings wey she no dey throw to me

Yet you ask what next?
Some guys lack basic emotional intelligence. If a woman likes you, she'll spare you the stress of using scopes and strategies.

Anyway, the next step would be you joining your colleagues in Romance section. Where y'all will rant on how girls are wicked.

gabinogem:
Give her some space...she has 'friendzoned' u. It will only take time, strategy & sacrifice before she can be urs...the question is: are u ready to put in all that resources to have her, is she worth it?

sacrifice ���

pvirus:


sacrifice ���

yes, like ur pride just to have her... There's something about rejection that kills people's pride.

AntiBrutus:



Yet you ask what next?
Some guys lack basic emotional intelligence. If a woman likes you, she'll spare you the stress of using scopes and strategies.

Anyway, the next step would be you joining your colleagues in Romance section. Where y'all will rant on how girls are wicked.

www.nairaland.com/attachments/6878250_img20180324192213_jpegdf9f3ef3944d239130a8d35123b57c4d

AntiBrutus:



Yet you ask what next?
Some guys lack basic emotional intelligence. If a woman likes you, she'll spare you the stress of using scopes and strategies.

Anyway, the next step would be you joining your colleagues in Romance section. Where y'all will rant on how girls are wicked.

anti, pls spare me the insults..... it would have being better if you just view and go

she might want to play hard to get so as not act cheap

pvirus:


anti, pls spare me the insults..... it would have being better if you just view and go

she might want to play hard to get so as not act cheap

Hard to get? After spelling it out to you that she can never date you. You both are GOOD FRIENDS --- she calls you her BESTIE.

Her hard to get didn't stop her from hanging out with you ? Where you probably buy refreshments as BESTIE that you are. Personally I see the whole hard to get as a symptom of emotional confusion.

---

But let me help you make excuses for her. Give her time, women love to be chased, your job is to do the chasing. So, keep being her good friend and bestie, not all relationships must be spontaneous. Just hang around, don't be all up in her face. With time, she will get to appreciate you.

^I hope you like that?
No worry, you go dey alright.

AntiBrutus:



Yet you ask what next?
Some guys lack basic emotional intelligence. If a woman likes you, she'll spare you the stress of using scopes and strategies.

Anyway, the next step would be you joining your colleagues in Romance section. Where y'all will rant on how girls are wicked.

Sometimes I wonder if your butt is jealous of all the crap that comes out of your mouth.

pvirus:


anti, pls spare me the insults..... it would have being better if you just view and go

she might want to play hard to get so as not act cheap

Don't mind that bitter fool. She's a two faced bitch very good at masking insults as sane advice. A known man hater on this forum now acting nice after being exposed for who she really is (countless times) but we all know her true colours.

My advice to you is this: there is no use waiting for a fruit to get ripe when there are countless ripe fruits for the plucking elsewhere.

You can still decide to hang on hoping that one day she would let down her defenses (maybe after some drinks) then you can smash. But if she already has someone and you know deep down in you it's just going to be a fools chase, just back off.

Invite another girl over and see how she reacts...all ladies have a natural instinct to protect the territory they feel belongs to them, use it to your advantage.

Go find another babe, dem many now shuuuu

From my brilliant "childish" calculations, I presume You were too-too nice to her from the onset. I mean, Things could never go wrong between you and her. Women frame that they like that from their man but that ain't true. You don't be to cool to a girl you hope to date or you have some level of attraction for. She Prolly gauged you as a weaky weaky who could not handle her. Just Move on, as you would require twice the energy you expended in becoming besties with her to unbestify yourself from her and redeem your image as a potential boyfriend before her. As someone brilliantly opined in the past, The way you start with a woman ends with a woman. Stop giving off the good boy vibes.Be a little rough. Do not consent to everything she says. A boy friend is a funky strict daddy. Daddies leads.Daddies are nice when they are to be nice. But Daddies are not always soft.

myself13:
........ Stop giving off the good boy vibes.Be a little rough. Do not consent to everything she says. A boy friend is a funky strict daddy.....

putting up this kind of attitude maybe be perceived by her that is it because she said No, that I never really love her, that i just wanted to chop and go....

pvirus:
There's is still girl I met some months ago....we rap up sha, we became good friends(such that she calls me her bestie)....but my defences broke down that I was now catching feelings sha....I told her about the way I felt....but what she said broke my heart.....said we dating can never work out. But we still see and Hangout

The question is what's next?.....Shoulda just let go or keep trying cuz I still dey catch feelings wey she no dey throw to me


Base on you romancelander experience what other scopes and strategies can u advice.

Did she give you reasons why she gave that answer?

pvirus:



putting up this kind of attitude maybe be perceived by her that is it because she said No, that I never really love her, that i just wanted to chop and go....

The advise I gave you was for your future dealings with women. You already screwed things up with this one. Yes, she could perceive that you want to chop and go and start misbehaving but that is because she has always known you in the uniform of a good boy and thus, this development would not come natural to her. But if you still want to redeem yourself to this same girl, which in my opinion ain't worth it(so many girls out there), then you will have to wear off your good boy uniform gradually like a nursery3 smart school kid, and put on the rough dirty daddy principle, precepts by precepts. When you transform in that way, she won't detect much. Though she could get a little confused in the long run. But this relationship isn't guaranteed. Good luck.

UDUJ:

Did she give you reasons why she gave that answer?

That she can't date her bestie.....that she's crushing on someone else

Some guys lack basic emotional intelligence in their dealings with women, that's a fact. She is already playing the game smarter, leaving you at a disadvantage. When e clear from your eye...you'll definitely join the "women are wicked crew".

It's is not an insult, the truth is bitter...and the guilty are afraid

AntiBrutus:


But let me help you make excuses for her. Give her time, women love to be chased, your job is to do the chasing. So, keep being her good friend and bestie, not all relationships must be spontaneous. Just hang around, don't be all up in her face. With time, she will get to appreciate you.

^I hope you like that?
No worry, you go dey alright.

Good answer. Probably the OP is still a kid. Women from the first contact already know if they will date you or not. That is why its possible for girls to meet a man and Bleep them the same day because they want him.

To the OP, go make money, read and carry yourself with pride, work on yourself, just be better than your yesterday, try to get six packs, it's attractive I guess you do not have many romantic options, hence you are stuck with a girl that has made it clear that she does not want you. Stop being that guy that is her option, it irritating.

Human predisposition to romance is one of the things that hasn't evolved. The richer, handsome, toned, smart, taller dude will always get the best girls. Being nice, patience, kind, her handbag won't stimulate her and makes her attracted, it is quite the opposite. Go do your thing and girls will notice you and chase you. You are a man, act like one.

AntiBrutus:


Hard to get? After spelling it out to you that she can never date you. You both are GOOD FRIENDS --- she calls you her BESTIE.

Her hard to get didn't stop her from hanging out with you ? Where you probably buy refreshments as BESTIE that you are. Personally I see the whole hard to get as a symptom of emotional confusion.

---

But let me help you make excuses for her. Give her time, women love to be chased, your job is to do the chasing. So, keep being her good friend and bestie, not all relationships must be spontaneous. Just hang around, don't be all up in her face. With time, she will get to appreciate you.

^I hope you like that?
No worry, you go dey alright.

wicked woman

I have never had a woman say no to me once before, so I am sorry I don't know what advice I should give all i know is one don't approach women with ordinary hands, if you want to get the best of ladies one must have either "power" (spiritual power controls physical) or "money" (problem with money is you Wil get her but she might decide whether to stay or just eat your money, it isn't the same with the former.

pvirus:



That she can't date her bestie.....that she's crushing on someone else

You've been friendzoned bruv

You are doing something wrong, which made her begin to think of you only as a friend.

You can change her mind with these six easy steps:

1) Keep your cool and accept the situation
Don’t beg for her to give you a chance, EVER. She made a conscious decision to not be anything more than friends with you. You must play with the irrational, illogical side of her personality. You’ll do much better if you start putting less focus on her and more focus on you.

2) Focus on self-improvement
Nobody is perfect, so there is always a huge amount of room for improvement. It gives us hope as well, right? Start looking your best. Go to the gym and keep up a healthy diet. Also, don’t forget about the intellectual side of things. Try to be a hot and interesting person. If you feel more confident about yourself, she will probably notice it. Girls love self-confidence and after all, the special girl you want is just a another girl.

3) Spend time with her doing regular things
No candles, dinner, watching sunset, listening to CD’s at your place, etc. Just invite her out to do “friendly” things with you. After all, this is exactly what she wanted, right? Go out and do the things you would do yourself anyway, like going out to buy new clothes and stuff like that. Shopping is actually a good idea for 2 reasons. She will be happy to help you and you will have a good opportunity to ‘accidentally’ show her some of your finely worked out body (see number 2).

Every situation that leaves some space for physical contact that leaves her thinking about you are helpful in this situation. Always try to emphasize your sexuality, but in a very polite, seemingly unconscious way.

4) Hang out with other people and have fun
A little dose of jealousy never hurt anyone. It’s like fueling her fire with desire. Without a little portion of it, any relationship can get boring, so flirt with other women! A lot. You can be the perfect guy, but she can’t know that she ‘has’ you. Ever.

Even If you have revealed your feelings to her directly or you have made it obvious to her, you should try to attract other women too! You will become more valuable in the mind of the girl you actually want. A twinge of jealousy that comes from knowing other people find you attractive is priceless.

The old adage ‘never put all your eggs in one basket’ is very true, so take advantage of it. Start meeting other people. It will get her curious, but also help you get some practice flirting. The more women you meet, the better you become at playing the game and getting the girl you want.

5) Finally, the difficult part, which probably you are doing wrong: flirting
Never forget the importance of sexual attraction. Of course, it’s less significant of an issue for women than for men, but after all, we have certain needs. Start teasing her and giving her compliments, but avoid elaborate, sophisticated ones. For example, perfume is a safe subject. If she chooses to wear perfume, it means she liked the scent, so it’s safe. It’s also a very sensual compliment. Always avoid teasing or discussing her age or weight. It can only go wrong.

6) Use sensual tricks
Touch her from time to time. I don’t mean grab her ass. I’m talking about touching her arm casually. I know it’s difficult for shy people, but if you play it cool, almost as though it’s accidental, it can work. But always pay attention to how she responds. Moderation is the best solution for everything.

How To Get Out Of The Friend Zone
All in all, you have to be a great observer. Pay attention to her and see if her attitude towards you has changed. If you see that she looks at you differently, touches you sometimes, starts flirting with you herself, notices that you work out, gets jealous when you are flirting with another woman, then these are all good signs! She will probably not make a move, so you must make it yourself. But she will give you hints to encourage you to kiss her or ask for a date.

oyb:


wicked woman

Once she gives a brother some tag like ---bestie, buddy, good friend, a brother to me. Forget it, he isn't her first choice. The best that can happen is he remains in that zone, becomes a friend with benefit or a back-up boyfriend [in future date].

The choice is his to either wait it out, or move on if the terms are not favourable to him

pansophist:


Good answer. Probably the OP is still a kid. Women from the first contact already know if they will date you or not. That is why its possible for girls to meet a man and Bleep them the same day because they want him.

To the OP, go make money, read and carry yourself with pride, work on yourself, just be better than your yesterday, try to get six packs, it's attractive I guess you do not have many romantic options, hence you are stuck with a girl that has made it clear that she does not want you. Stop being that guy that is her option, it irritating.

You're very experienced.

You see that 6packs, it is very very attractive
Do you have?

AntiBrutus:


You're very experienced.

You see that 6packs, it is very very attractive
Do you have?

I practice what I preach

pansophist:


I practice what I preach

Hmmm...
That's nice. Takes a lot of dedication.
I can't help but appreciate a brother who has them

Happy Sunday.