Simply buy the house from her and move in, then put the money for the sale into a joint account

No

Burgerlomo:
There is nothing wrong with it as far as the man is ready to relinquish power, give up his authority as a man to become madam of the house.

Would you now suggest the house is sold off because of ego?

swiz123:
This is a difficult question to answer, considering the fact that woman rarely build a house in this country .Those who succeed in building one leaves it for her parents.

If the lady built a house, then it would be foolish to move to a rented apartment with her husband.

However, the lady must always acknowledge that the man is the head of the house.

I quite key into your point, most important thing is understanding and submissiveness from the woman's side..... But do u not think, Maybe later on when misunderstanding sets in, she could bring such into her cheap talks to score points?

tosyne2much:
There won't be problem in as much as the man is ready to relinquish power and become a wussy husband

On a very serious note, it doesn't dignify a man. Reason being that this is "NIGERIA" not England or France .. You are probably going to lose your respect as the head of the family and will most likely become tantamount to a loaf of bread in the presence of your in-laws.

Aside that, you know how women normally behave especially when they are shouldering responsibilities in the family (not to talk of moving into the house owned by a woman). Such a man will have to tolerate all sort of manners from the woman. This is just the bitter truth!

Why get married in the first place when you know you can't house your wife?

Guys, click LIKE if you are in support of it , click SHARE if you disagree

So u would advise the house is sold off right? But when two are married, they were suppose to become one as whatever they own become theirs or is it whatever the woman owns is hers alone while that of the husband is theirs?

lifedynamics:
I don't see anything wrong with it... If you like call it "westernized cultutetor mentality"... See Ehn I'm a very simple guy who lacks this toxic African masculine pride (I have pride ooo and self esteem, but not a toxic one).That being said I would even prefer moving in with her so we'll have two houses. I would even prefer a richer wife cause all I see is more money and not less submission.
I don't want African submission(Slavery), I would've married a slave if that was the case... I need a partner and best friend.
Cause some of us will want to do man of the house, Iron Man... Sole provider and when you're tired and burned out you'll start pouring aggression on your wife and kids, all because you want to do superhero
Why would I want a broker wife, when we can use our money for a holiday or to buy stuff at a Gucci shop.
Don't let pride( toxic pride, cause pride is good)ruin your chance at a peaceful life. It all depends on your mentality and Sense of reasoning.

Hmmm
One thing is we have helpers God has channeled to help us be it male or female to make our journey to the top worthwhile. Guys wouldn't mind marrying girls from wealthy home or successful ladies if opportunities come. Normal connotation is the rich marry themselves while the poor make do with the leftovers, and why would a man allow pride becloud his sense of reasoning and not secure a better future if there's genuine love from their two while he's not wasting off either. There are two sides to a coin and I feel it is dicey but there's nothing wrong in it, so long there's love and understanding. I feel if a woman would respect you or not, even if you buy her heaven and it's not in her nature to respect, she still wouldn't, she would still tell you, what have u done that no one has done before.

AntiBrutus:
This question here is one reason, women will/should continue to marry up and men will marry down. It is good for everyone's sanity in the long run. Everyone is 'happy'.

May one man not return you to lack, all because of his ego...

Amen o, but these your words are strong o...women should marry up while men marry down.... Biko, who marry down epp, Na to marry up o...

kazyhm:


Was it bride price or groom price that was paid ?
as in you won't even stay one year in you own rented apartment but move majestically to your wife's house from the wedding reception

So are you suggesting the woman stays in the rented apartment with the man for a year, they should renew the house rent before packing into the lady's own house..... ?

Mcy56:
Not advisable going by African culture.
Not a bad thing if the wife has a house of her own but the most dignifying thing is to move in with her husby after marriage.

So what happens to her house? Imagine a lady was bequeathed a house, so she should go and stay in her hubby's house and be more of a liability and not help solve issues as regards financial capabilities. Remember whatever affects the man affects the wife as they're one. Don't forget if the man is determined, staying In that house won't limit him from building different houses everywhere throughout the world, it could just be a stepping stone, are there no culture that we have broken as Nigerians and Africans and do we hold on to all cultures even if it limits our potentials of rediscovering ourselves?

TheUpsetGirl:


what's wrong with that?

What's your take on the issue?

Smartii:

Would you now suggest the house is sold off because of ego?

Biko Mam, we're different from each other so you can just go ahead and move to your husband house

Except the man has no shame that's when he will pack into a woman's house after marriage.

Smartii:

So what happens to her house? Imagine a lady was bequeathed a house, so she should go and stay in her hubby's house and be more of a liability and not help solve issues as regards financial capabilities. Remember whatever affects the man affects the wife as they're one. Don't forget if the man is determined, staying In that house won't limit him from building different houses everywhere throughout the world, it could just be a stepping stone, are there no culture that we have broken as Nigerians and Africans and do we hold on to all cultures even if it limits our potentials of rediscovering ourselves?

miss smartii. there is nothing wrong in a man moving into a womans house.. it depends on their terms and understanding.
PS: as for me oo.. i wont wish even my worst enemy to move in with his woman not to talk of me....IMPOSSIBLE.

Smartii:

So what happens to her house? Imagine a lady was bequeathed a house, so she should go and stay in her hubby's house and be more of a liability and not help solve issues as regards financial capabilities. Remember whatever affects the man affects the wife as they're one. Don't forget if the man is determined, staying In that house won't limit him from building different houses everywhere throughout the world, it could just be a stepping stone, are there no culture that we have broken as Nigerians and Africans and do we hold on to all cultures even if it limits our potentials of rediscovering ourselves?

How does the bolded applicable here?

If a woman has her own house the better for the couple. She rents out her own and continue living in her husby's house, simple!
Revenue generated from her house will be channeled towards other projects that will benefit the husband and the children.
If she's a kind hearted woman and the husband's head stays in one place, then its a win-win for both of them; she'll be an invaluable asset to her husby, shikena!

lwanga1993:

miss smartii. there is nothing wrong in a man moving into a womans house.. it depends on their terms and understanding.
PS: as for me oo.. i wont wish even my worst enemy to move in with his woman not to talk of me....IMPOSSIBLE.

See contradiction!
A man with self worth will/may choose not to move into a woman's house.
Some women are somehow, they will use it to abuse the man at the slightest opportunity should misunderstanding or disagreement occurs.

Smartii:

So are you suggesting the woman stays in the rented apartment with the man for a year, they should renew the house rent before packing into the lady's own house..... ?

Yes......you heard me right

Don't be deceived by western culture coz when u compare their women to naija women mentality differs
If u want to continue to have ur respect in the house don't even try it coz all naija women are mostly the same

Mcy56:


How does the bolded applicable here?

If a woman has her own house the better for the couple. She rents out her own and continue living in her husby's house, simple!
Revenue generated from her house will be channeled towards other projects that will benefit the husband and the children.
If she's a kind hearted woman and the husband's head stays in one place, then its a win-win for both of them; she'll be an invaluable asset to her husby, shikena!

Hmmmm...guess most Nigerian men almost think same way, but very unusual of ladies having this kind of disposition of yours, that's good! I attended a radio programme where such was thrown open for discussion, but all the callers both young and old males didn't mind staying in that house so long they're one and there's love. What baffled me was men of old agreeing to same since our culture was well followed to the letters in their days, yeah present generation of youth could agree, wouldn't blame them though probably due to westernization and the quest to not settle for something less.... Your points are valid and it won't be bad if the house was rented out and channel proceedings in more other productive ventures. Good! Thanks.

chris31:
Don't be deceived by western culture coz when u compare their women to naija women mentality differs
If u want to continue to have ur respect in the house don't even try it coz all naija women are mostly the same

Hmmmm
Kk
Thanks.

Mcy56:


See contradiction!
A man with self worth will/may choose not to move into a woman's house.
Some women are somehow, they will use it to abuse the man at the slightest opportunity should misunderstanding or disagreement occurs.

Hahahah
Just as men know thyself
Women know THEMSELVES too
The woman could end up been more disrespectful if table tuns round that the guy couldn't even meet up with his responsibilities anymore.
I had a lecturer then in the University who once said in class that he prays daily to God to never allow his wife to be more successful than him, we just castigated, hissed and abused him, though in our mind and behind his back though but I doubt it won't be bad if any of the two is richer.

lwanga1993:


miss smartii. there is nothing wrong in a man moving into a womans house.. it depends on their terms and understanding.
PS: as for me oo.. i wont wish even my worst enemy to move in with his woman not to talk of me....IMPOSSIBLE.

Miss smarti kwanu.. Biko Na Mr. Smartii o..... Yeah, terms and conditions can even b broken sef with slight misunderstanding, coupled with the rate some ladies murder their husbands when extremely angered or jealousy sets in, I feel for a man to do that, he must have studied and understudied the woman to not be temperamental... Even at that, change is constant.....
Thanks, your contribution had been helpful, To continue to be that man that most honorable men are, she moves into the man's house while they find another way in putting the lady's house to good use just as mcy56 said, even though I almost didn't believe that could come from a lady.

Smartii:

Hahahah
Just as men know thyself
Women know THEMSELVES too
The woman could end up been more disrespectful if table tuns round that the guy couldn't even meet up with his responsibilities anymore.
I had a lecturer then in the University who once said in class that he prays daily to God to never allow his wife to be more successful than him, we just castigated, hissed and abused him, though in our mind and behind his back though but I doubt it won't be bad if any of the two is richer.

Yeah! No thanks to men anyway.

Men are full of ego, they want respect but this can better be earned in a home he can confidently called his own. It's part of a man's way of having a say over his woman and in his home. The woman on the other hand will have peace of mind from unnecessary nagging.

While a woman may choose to be submissive, loyal to a man and not mind sharing her house with him, majority of them will still find a way to look sideways no matter how they pledged commitment, guess its in their DNA.

Now imagine a situation where the woman got wind of such secret affair, or maybe he even impregnated another lady, will you blame the woman for using the house to insult, ridicule and make mockery of him? Or even in some cases ordered him to move out of the house?

Okay. Your guess/answer is as good as mine.

Smartii:

So u would advise the house is sold off right? But when two are married, they were suppose to become one as whatever they own become theirs or is it whatever the woman owns is hers alone while that of the husband is theirs?

That was why I said this is "Nigeria"

It takes a VERY humble woman to remain not to disregard such a man

lefulefu:
Except the man has no shame that's when he will pack into a woman's house after marriage.

It doesn't even sound well at all

tosyne2much:
That was why I said this is "Nigeria"

It takes a VERY humble woman to remain not to disregard such a man

Very true....

tosyne2much:
It doesn't even sound well at all

even the lady's neighbours will be laughing at such a man.next thing for him na to dey carry d woman car dey drive and dey do houseboy follow the wife.

lefulefu:
even the lady's neighbours will be laughing at such a man.next thing for him na to dey carry d woman car dey drive and dey do houseboy follow the wife.

Lol

lefulefu:
even the lady's neighbours will be laughing at such a man.next thing for him na to dey carry d woman car dey drive and dey do houseboy follow the wife.

I dey tell you

What's wrong abt it

lifedynamics:
I don't see anything wrong with it... If you like call it "westernized cultutetor mentality"... See Ehn I'm a very simple guy who lacks this toxic African masculine pride (I have pride ooo and self esteem, but not a toxic one).That being said I would even prefer moving in with her so we'll have two houses. I would even prefer a richer wife cause all I see is more money and not less submission.
I don't want African submission(Slavery), I would've married a slave if that was the case... I need a partner and best friend.
Cause some of us will want to do man of the house, Iron Man... Sole provider and when you're tired and burned out you'll start pouring aggression on your wife and kids, all because you want to do superhero
Why would I want a broker wife, when we can use our money for a holiday or to buy stuff at a Gucci shop.
Don't let pride( toxic pride, cause pride is good)ruin your chance at a peaceful life. It all depends on your mentality and Sense of reasoning.

Same here.. I now I ve seen someone like me so I can come out. I ve also never been comfortable with the idea of total submission. It doesn't make sense. Why burn myself out just for ego?