She is CIRCUMCISED!

OP, check @olawunmiesan on Instagram or go to the website www.olawunmiesan.com

It's either most of the people commenting on this thread are ignorant or chose to ignore the fact that his wife is circumcised.

Women who are circumcised rarely have libido. Op, that's the plain truth and the only problem I see. It is the acknowledgement of this fact and how you handle it henceforth that will matter.

It is not her fault she was circumcised. So she needs your help and understanding. Calm down, take it easy and do more sensual and romantic stuffs than the actual knacking. You will need a lot of caressing and lubrication. Don't always demand for sax, let it just happen. Kitchen, bathroom, car, cinema, church toilet , park. Remember, She does not have the cl!toris and the labia to pad the the blokus' penetration.

Saying to a circumcised woman, you wanna have sax, is like saying... Oya, let me perform surgery on you.

Educate her too so that she can help herself too. She can do hand job, and other stuff to spice things up.

sammydirectly:
It's either most of the people commenting on this thread are ignorant or chose to ignore the fact that his wife is circumcised.

Women who are circumcised rarely have libido. Op, that's the plain truth and the only problem I see. It is the acknowledgement of this fact and how you handle it henceforth that will matter.

It is not her fault she was circumcised. So she needs your help and understanding. Calm down, take it easy and do more sensual and romantic stuffs than the actual knacking. You will need a lot of caressing and lubrication. Don't always demand for sax, let it just happen. Kitchen, bathroom, car, cinema, church toilet , park. Remember, She does not have the cl!toris and the labia to pad the the blokus' penetration.

Saying to a circumcised woman, you wanna have sax, is like saying... Oya, let me perform surgery on you.

Educate her too so that she can help herself too. She can do hand job, and other stuff to spice things up.

you have said it all. some women who aren't circumcised loose their sexual drive after birth and for some, their sexual drive gets high. The fact that she's circumcised and has given birth, isn't easy for her. OP, your wife wants to perform her wifely duties too but she just can't help not feeling sexually active and I am sure you wouldn't want her to just lay down there like a log of wood while you go in and out.. Talk about it and if possible surf the net together, look for that thing that'll make her want to think of sex and do it so she'll try and have a little urge. Take your time with her and dont pressure her much because that'll also keep turning her off anytime. It'll take time but I hope she comes around...

...

I pray I don't lose mine after childbirth

yettymuse:
She is CIRCUMCISED!

Its common even with the uncircumsiced.

sammydirectly:
It's either most of the people commenting on this thread are ignorant or chose to ignore the fact that his wife is circumcised.

Women who are circumcised rarely have libido. Op, that's the plain truth and the only problem I see. It is the acknowledgement of this fact and how you handle it henceforth that will matter.

It is not her fault she was circumcised. So she needs your help and understanding. Calm down, take it easy and do more sensual and romantic stuffs than the actual knacking. You will need a lot of caressing and lubrication. Don't always demand for sax, let it just happen. Kitchen, bathroom, car, cinema, church toilet , park. Remember, She does not have the cl!toris and the labia to pad the the blokus' penetration.

Saying to a circumcised woman, you wanna have sax, is like saying... Oya, let me perform surgery on you.

Educate her too so that she can help herself too. She can do hand job, and other stuff to spice things up.

It happens to women, circumcised or not.

You forget op mentioned that the sex was good premarriage and even a year into the marriage.
Most married women have a sudden drop in libido soon after their first child. I can't remember why right now. Drives men crazy though.

And no, helping with the chores doesn't work(though IRS always nice to help the wife out from time to time) The woman has to make a conscious decision to have sex with her husband to calm him down until her libido returns.

@robk,
Op her libido will return but the time for the return varieds from woman to woman. From as soon as a month to as far as a year after her last childbirth. You can google it up and read more about it. Na one of the wahala of marriage be dat. Kpele.

merit1988:
What all this complain of married men and sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex all the time? Isn't there other things to ponder on in marriage than sex? Ur even calculating the number of times to bleep a week.who does that? Marriage is for mature minds and not for sex freaks.

I would urge you to take your advise and not get married yet.

Women crave 'attention' from their husbands as a show of love.

Men crave quality all of you in it sex from their wives as a show of love.

All the husbands who complain of their wives sexual negligence always feel rejected; not 'man' enough; unloved etc.

robk:
I decided to join Nairaland after a lot of search on marriage and sex on google directed me here. I have been married for 5years and the only time i never had issues with my wife about sex was our dating period and the year we got married (Please take not that we don't have trust issues). Immediately our first child came, her drive for sex dropped. I have done everything possible to awaken her sexual drive to no avail. She always complain of being tired because of house chores and i even went as far as helping to bath the kids, take them to school and bring them back, wash dishes, do laundry and many more just to ease the stress for her yet she still denies me sex when i need it most. It's not as if i ask for it too sex frequently, most times it's usually on the average of 3 or 4 times in a week yet she sees it as a big deal. I have explained to her my real self, if i have my way i would had sex 2 times every single day of my life, but i had no choice but to adjust to 3 or 4 times in a week, sometimes 2 times or even none.

Maybe i didn't go for counseling prior our marriage, maybe i need to know how it should be done or how other women do it. I have heard women say that they have never said NO to their husband and i have heard men said their wife's have never said a NO to them before. I'm at the verge of looking for any good loyal girl who i can place on salary and who i can run to whenever my wife says no because i will never force a woman to have sex with her even though i paid a pride price on her.

This issue is worrisome to me and it hurts me deeply whenever i'm in the mood and she turns me down, it makes me feel a lesser man and couple with the fact that she never gets wet makes me think otherwise.........maybe she don't love me deeply hence her withdrawal from sexual activities, maybe it's because she was circumcised and it makes her lost interest in sex, i have asked myself a lot of questions and also asked her same questions but all she says is that i'm not grateful and that she can't kill herself because she wants to satisfy me sexually. To me it's a big deal that can tear the marriage apart in no distant time hence i came here to seek some advice before the worst happen

Please only constructive advice, thanks

I would rule out circumcision because your sex life prior your baby was great.

I also have a problem with her saying she can't kill herself because she wants to satisfy you. She is accusing you of not been grateful for what?

Let her know that it is her duty to sexually satisfy you and whatever she likes, she must do to satisfy you.

Saying you will cheat without addressing the issue is saying a woman should ignore her husband and collect the child's school fees from an ex.

Just how you cannot decide you don't want to kill yourself and not do your duties at home, she cannot decide not to do hers.

That said, I think you should stop some extras you do till she starts fucking you with euthanism and desire. Extras like little things you gift her, extra things you do to make her happy else you are enabling bad behaviour and it is like giving a child biscuit after they throw a tantrum. Don't also settle for duty sex.

Doing more chores et al will not cure your problem. Just ensure that she is truly not tired from overworking/exhaustion.

@Forcing her: Except you are talking to injuring her, marriage provides everlasting consent and you are well within your rights to apply whatever measure you deem fit to get the sex from her.

It will be well.

Circumcision is no1 causes,she really won't enjoy sex..
Child birth is another causes nd it happen to 60% of woman...

It happen to me after I had my son,i never had the urge for sex,i usually run or start crying when it's time to have intimate with my hubby...

There are some natural drink that help sex drive,
Google preparation for "kunu Aya",it's really good nd she can be drinking it 3-4 times in a week.the kunu Aya really help me alot cause I drink it almost every day.

Also you can buy her "women Spanish flyfly",just a drop in her drinking water nd she is good to go.she will have d urge for sex.
It was wen I got married I no sex in marriage is very important..
It is well with ur family.

merit1988:
What all this complain of married men and sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex all the time? Isn't there other things to ponder on in marriage than sex? Ur even calculating the number of times to bleep a week.who does that? Marriage is for mature minds and not for sex freaks.

I know sey as good as you dey look you dey sexually useless

ArinzeRaph:
I know sey as good as you dey look you dey sexually useless

oh get off me,DOG

merit1988:
oh get off me,DOG

oh get on me, useless biatch

ArinzeRaph:
oh get on me, useless biatch

Odeh,he can't even spell BITCH educated illiterate

merit1988:
Odeh,he can't even spell BITCH educated illiterate

olodo, I will not tell you the reason why I wrote it like that

BlaqCoffee109:
How you initiate it matters...sex does not need to be a slam,wham...bam, thank you ma'am kinda thing! You need to get her in the zone. Try this...when she's fresh in the morning give her a nice little smooch and something to think about in anticipation for your return... surprise her with little nice things...take her to a spa, get her hair done, shopping...take her out to dinner,rekindle the romance, work on her mind...start fore play with words, caresses... little kisses here and there...be patient,work on her body...lead her until she craves for you...try this somewhat; keep yourself buff and all,retain some air...anyways, what do I know? Hope this might be of help...HML!

This is too much just to have sex with your wife, for goodness sake. I get you in a way, maybe you’re insuniating he should spice things up. But I think it’s a problem deeper than just ‘spice’. She may be feeling insecure, unhappy, so many things.

robk, I don't know if other posters asked if your wife is on family planning. if she is, take it as a pointer on how to resolve the lack of sexual urges.

I hear ye.

ImaIma1:
You guys need to go for counselling. That is your best bet. Your wife needs to hear it herself from a professional or Cleric that a woman should never say No to her husband.

Off course there are times when she is genuinely tired or ill.

There is nothing like not being in the mood. She should get in the mood

Are you financially comfortable?
Does she go to work in the morning, come back to do chores in the evening or is a stay at home mum?
Maybe in her mind she is like "ya mates dey hustle outside you dey here dey find f8ck. na him me and my kids go chop?"
Please get someone to assist her at home
You can kuku dash her 2k per round
She go dey beg you sef, you can go as much as 3 rounds per day. Thats 6k
You are happy, she is happy and no need for any smallie outside again.

BellaElla:
Are you financially comfortable?
Does she go to work in the morning, come back to do chores in the evening or is a stay at home mum?
Maybe in her mind she is like "ya mates dey hustle outside you dey here dey find f8ck. na him me and my kids go chop?"
Please get someone to assist her at home
You can kuku dash her 2k per round
She go dey beg you sef, you can go as much as 3 rounds per day. Thats 6k
You are happy, she is happy and no need for any smallie outside again.

ha God!!!!! Why evuls

robk:
I decided to join Nairaland after a lot of search on marriage and sex on google directed me here. I have been married for 5years and the only time i never had issues with my wife about sex was our dating period and the year we got married (Please take not that we don't have trust issues). Immediately our first child came, her drive for sex dropped. I have done everything possible to awaken her sexual drive to no avail. She always complain of being tired because of house chores and i even went as far as helping to bath the kids, take them to school and bring them back, wash dishes, do laundry and many more just to ease the stress for her yet she still denies me sex when i need it most. It's not as if i ask for it too sex frequently, most times it's usually on the average of 3 or 4 times in a week yet she sees it as a big deal. I have explained to her my real self, if i have my way i would had sex 2 times every single day of my life, but i had no choice but to adjust to 3 or 4 times in a week, sometimes 2 times or even none.

Maybe i didn't go for counseling prior our marriage, maybe i need to know how it should be done or how other women do it. I have heard women say that they have never said NO to their husband and i have heard men said their wife's have never said a NO to them before. I'm at the verge of looking for any good loyal girl who i can place on salary and who i can run to whenever my wife says no because i will never force a woman to have sex with her even though i paid a pride price on her.

This issue is worrisome to me and it hurts me deeply whenever i'm in the mood and she turns me down, it makes me feel a lesser man and couple with the fact that she never gets wet makes me think otherwise.........maybe she don't love me deeply hence her withdrawal from sexual activities, maybe it's because she was circumcised and it makes her lost interest in sex, i have asked myself a lot of questions and also asked her same questions but all she says is that i'm not grateful and that she can't kill herself because she wants to satisfy me sexually. To me it's a big deal that can tear the marriage apart in no distant time hence i came here to seek some advice before the worst happen

Please only constructive advice, thanks

pre-intimacy, pre-intimacy pre-intimacy. I can't stress this enough. You say she is dry . That's because she is not aroused. Before you go in make sure she is sufficiently aroused. Read up online on how to arouse a woman. Because the truth is that she is turning you down because she does not enjoy it as much as you. You have to make it as good for her as you can. Read online on how to arouse a circumcised woman

ArinzeRaph:
olodo, I will not tell you the reason why I wrote it like that

I laugh in Swahili for u. Dumb skull

merit1988:
I laugh in Swahili for u. Dumb skull

you are the dumb skull here. It seems you don't know much about nairaland

ArinzeRaph:
you are the dumb skull here. It seems you don't know much about nairaland

and how can u be exchanging words with a woman? Guess ur a lesser woman feeling like a man. Jobless Anu ohia

merit1988:
and how can u be exchanging words with a woman? Guess ur a lesser woman feeling like a man. Jobless Anu ohia

oh ! I bu onye banyi. Gbaghara m nne. I don't do this with umunwayi banyi. bye

ArinzeRaph:
oh ! I bu onye banyi. Gbaghara m nne. I don't do this with umunwayi banyi. bye