Ikem11:
Time wait for no man

Amaraokafor:


My mom kept telling me this.

post=67236692:
Talk to him, ask him what he REALLY wants.
Dont die in silence.
Relationship is a talking thing.
Make your decision from whatever the outcome of your decision is.

JasonScoolari:
You wasted 3 good years waiting for your man to spice up the relationship when you can do something magical to light up the relationship? Instead of you to be creative on how to make things work, you want us to give you an ill-advise on how to switch to the next prick.




I wish you well.

david2:
Hmm...this is really serious. Have u asked ur man where the relationship is going to get assurance b4 u leave him.

U can decide to date this new guy and he won't marry u after 3yrs. The bottom line is, talk to ur man, plan the future with him and help him build a family u want.

Amaraokafor:


I have talked to him severally unend.
I have tried as much as I could to explain to him about my grievances. I expect after the talk changes will occur but instead I see myself still complaining over and over again.

IamD18:
Stop seeking for validation from us to cheat.

Men alone shouldn't be the ones to spice and entice a relationship, if your relationship is dull and empty, spice it up, make it hot and happening, if done and it comes to no avail, if he doesn't respond positively to your efforts to make the relationship fun filled, then break up with him in an appropriate manner.

Between, you are desperate for marriage, that's why you are bothered. #Fact!

Preetiex:
if ur guy is not willing to make tins work,tell him to give u a break u dont have to date a guy to be happy forget about relationships for sometime & enjoy ur life,besides wat effort have U put into d relationship to spice it up

Amaraokafor:


Calm down.
I'm naturally a sociable person, he is not. He has no friends and don't hang out. When I try to instigate such, he seems cool but when it's time to take such actions he just doesn't bring himself to do it. Again Oga, no be person wet you see you go go out with? Even when I volunteer to see him, he just gives excuses.[/b]I have sat down to think where the problem is coming from and still I don't seem to understand.

JasonScoolari:
Volunteer? Lol, c'mon girl, visit him unexpectedly and do something "crazy" with him.

Amaraokafor:



It's normal for humans to be desperate to get happiness. As a young man yourself, if you are not desperate to make money and have a happy family, then there's something wrong somewhere. The thing is, one should not allow desperation to to block common sense.

Like I pointed earlier, I was never that kind of lady who is desperate. I only realize, of course with this present issue that I may just be wasting my time and removing other opportunities in my life. I'm not docile. I'm industrious and I want to be happy and have my own family BUT I'm also careful and that's why I'm seeking for advice despite several attempts to make my man sit up and at least establish as much physical contacts as possible so things can begin to take positive shape. As it is, I don't even know where I stand.

IamD18:


If you are not happy in that relationship, then break up with him.

It's simple, relationship should make partners happy, not angry.

Kindly break up if you want marriage and he's not ready to give it.

Amaraokafor:


Thanks.
I have talked to him. I have raised lots of prospect for the future which we agreed on. I have given him a lot of heads up and better ways to handle future things that's not money consuming. I'm using every means available including prayers to set it right.I want to ask a question, can you plan a future with a man you see just once in 4 or 3 months?

Amaraokafor:



Oga, you don't understand

I'm more crazy than that you put up there. But, the present situation of things now is not one that one can visit unexpectedly. I wish I can say more....

That aside. I'm dating a, man that when you discuss with him and talk, he sees sense in the discussion. He agrees and you think everything is settled. But na wash

He won't make a move on what is eventually concluded.

Amaraokafor:


Thanks.
I have talked to him. I have raised lots of prospect for the future which we agreed on. I have given him a lot of heads up and better ways to handle future things that's not money consuming. I'm using every means available including prayers to set it right.I want to ask a question, can you plan a future with a man you see just once in 4 or 3 months?

PresVA:
Hmmmm, seems he has a problem taking initiatives. . not a good one

when you initiate actions, does he continue?

mrphysics:
Op, are you looking for a reason to end a relationship which you know has already ended?

You know he won't change and from all indications, you have done your best to save the already dead relationship. Stop wasting the damn time, end the relationship and reset his brain.

Trust me, you will be helping the guy have a rethink when you call it an end. Until then, the guy will think he is doing the right thing. Also, the guy may have replaced you with someone else and waiting for you to realize the ugly truth and move on.

PresVA:
What arrangements are you guys making to be closer? I just feel like if the distance factor is eliminated, your relationship will be a lot more enjoyable. .

I was in a LDR with my bf for sometime(now husband) but we made arrangements/sacrifices to be together because we wanted a future together. .

If you guys are serious, then you should be planning on how to bridge the distance prob... If you don't make such discussions, then you probably ain't planning a future together hence shouldn't be together. .

I wish you the best.

Amaraokafor:



Well, truth is even when the distance became shortened. I noticed the same issue still lingers.Its funny how a man says, "I'm lonely,wish you are here... Blah blah blah blah... " and when you say, "Let's see then.. "He says, "Okay... "

That okay will happen in three months time!

Amaraokafor:
Good morning nairalanders. Forgive my blunders if you find any.

I need a candid advice for a decision in life I'm about to make. I have been dating this guy for three years now and even if we like each other, I'm beginning to realize that I'm getting tired of the relationship.

I come from a family of three girls and four boys. My elder sister is married as well as my younger sister.I'm the one left hanging in the air. I'm not a desperate lady, but recently I'm beginning to realize that feigning ignorance to this particular issue is beginning to take its toll on me.

I'm in a LDR that has seen little or no results for the past three years. Although there's a reasonable online contact, but physical presence is like a war. Sometimes I don't get to see him for months.The thing again is I'm chasing other guys away from me. Kept saying I'm taken but it's like I'm deceiving myself. I'm tired. I've tried to let go several times but couldn't just bring myself to do it.


Recently another guy came into my life and he seems really nice.He asked me out for a lunch date but I've been mute. I don't want to double date and my present relationship is beginning to make me deeply sad. I like my present man but the relationship is so dull. It's too empty. There are no memories. It's like Im not even in a relationship to start with. Apart from the fact we profess love to each other, I think it's the most dull and under performing relationship ever.He is responsible and cool headed, but the way he handles our relationship leaves me completely empty, extremely sad and hopeless.

I want to date again, but it's like I need a push. I have this ugly reputation for overstreching patience. This suffering inside and smiling outside syndrome. So people don't get to know how extremely sad I'm until I open up. I'm extremely sad.


Talk to me.
I will listen.