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How Do You Deal With A Breakup? - Romance (7) - Nairaland

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Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by hechno(m): 8:05am On Jun 18, 2018
Synord:
Hmmn.


I remember vividly , the memories are still Crystal clear like iPhone 8 images and the pain runs deep in my heart like arteries..
The moments are still engraved in my mind like Okorocha's statues and the fights/drama embedded in my medulla like hai hai is embedded in small doctor's mouth..


it happened in the year 2014, a year I can never forget in a hurry ..

I dated This girl for 5 years..Five good years. I could have studied a course and graduated from the university with the time I invested in the relationship .

Sometimes I still miss her like the way Messi does with Penalties.

She was everything ..My heart ..My love..My Queen , My Baby


..She had this radiant smile that could lighten up anyone's mood. She is intelligent , patient,God fearing,cooks well,dances well , neat, sociable, attractive, Perfect dress sense with the most amazing physique I have ever seen.

Anita was everything a man could wish for ..The way she walked,talked, loved and fuc ked ... Kasa !!!! ...she was the 9th wonder of the world to me..

and when she wears that particular red dress with the Jesus rosary hanging in between her two succulent mammary glands and she calls me by my first name in that seductive " toolz o " kinda tone and her orgasm bringing British accent as she slowly rolls her tongue and puts her finger in her mouth while touching her round and succulent buttocks made of the softest extraction of flesh I have seen ,

I totally forget myself and lose control ( in Peruzzi's voice) .At that moment, I know I just have to make paradise because I was already tasting version 1.0 with Anita here.

is it her sparkling white teeth ? , her daily teasing of me being the most handsome man she has ever seen , her dirty talks, when she motivates me to achieve a lot of things I achieved , she teaches me, corrects me in love , how she handles me when I am angry at her ,she knows my weak points , She knows how to garnish my favorite dishes, she is never insecure,jealous or violent ..How she sold her Father's motorcycle to help me with a business I invested in, burned candles with me in school, shunned a lot of richer and more good looking guys for me .....

Damn !!!!


she could literally die for me !!!

Anita...


Anita..

Not until 2014 when the unthinkable happened..



Did I get over Anita ??

yes I did !!! How the hell I did is a story for another day probably..


P:S I think it is more painful or difficult to get over a person after breakup when

1) you unavoidably see the person everyday / once a week / frequently

2) when the. reason for break up is petty/ not cheating/ something that can be easily resolved

3) there is no other better option/person on ground

4) The partner moved on to a better person in terms of looks, money or status

5) When you really really love the person

6) when you are broke grin

7) When the sex is Ogorodomdom

cool when you guys are meant for each other ..




so pathetic
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by futurism: 8:11am On Jun 18, 2018
Olayemi244:
It's really terrible.... At least I'm speaking from my 5 years of experience and the memories keep getting back to me and with any slight chances of listening to her voice again I'd still feel like we should get back together and let her know but she always refused and she'd told me to get over her and move on with my life. Just completely erased her and mobile number off my memory about two months ago. Though not that I have another lover at the moment but I believe the best match for me will come.


#AwaitingCopa

Women generally have what they seek in a man...if they don't see it, bros, nothing you can do that will change the situation

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Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by IamHopeful(f): 8:14am On Jun 18, 2018
dairykidd:

U are a very smart girl & that might likely work but i believe my more radical approach will get him to the desired destination faster wink

OK then...... So, what's your more radical approach?
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by toyosi15(m): 8:15am On Jun 18, 2018
RosaBerry:
Asking for a brother who has really tried all he could to get over a relationship of 4years.

How is the best way to deal with a break up.



Lol I didn't even know that boys can cry. Chai

broke up with a girl once cause I didn’t take the relationship serious ,but after the whole break “ish” I saw her broke down in tears jeez!! I realized what’s i had just and I cried like hell, we came to a mutual understanding about it and she was happy .and it was only then my conscience cleared
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Nobody: 8:18am On Jun 18, 2018
IamHopeful:


OK then...... So, what's your more radical approach?
Fifth post on the first page... And don't judge me by it i only just prescribed it based on what was diagnosed wink
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by XingXhang(m): 8:18am On Jun 18, 2018
[quote author=megley post=68585371][/quote]

To life
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Nobody: 8:21am On Jun 18, 2018
nanauju:


4 years and still counting.. How much longer does he need to get over it?
learn how to read
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by encryptjay(m): 8:21am On Jun 18, 2018
Crying is a coping device but he needs to GET OUT.
It's not advisable to carry all your heart into a relationship.
You didn't lose a wife, just a gf bro.
But where did she say he's been sulking for 5 years that some posters are commenting about?
He's not trying enough to get over her.
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by IamHopeful(f): 8:29am On Jun 18, 2018
dairykidd:

Fifth post on the first page... And don't judge me by it i only just prescribed it based on what was diagnosed wink

Lol........ Can you imagine?!

Truth be told, that "more radical approach" of yours might work for some people but, know that it's just temporary.

A very reasonable guy will still get home after all those and still have that vacuum of not being happy. It's just like a person that drinks alcohol because he's not happy, after the alcohol clears off, his unhappiness is still waiting for him at one corner. grin

And yes, I'll judge you based on your "more radical approach". tongue cheesy

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Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Cuddlebugie(f): 8:29am On Jun 18, 2018
I still don't get my head around why some men boast about how they haven’t cried in years, as if being emotionally constipated is somehow a badge of honour to brag about. angry

You're not a robot, you're human and you're allowed to feel.


pcguru1:


I'd rather get hit by a cow than to cry. When a man cries he means that sh.it.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Nobody: 8:41am On Jun 18, 2018
IamHopeful:


Lol........ Can you imagine?!

Truth be told, that "more radical approach" of yours might work for some people but, know that it's just temporary.

A very reasonable guy will still get home after all those and still have that vacuum of not being happy. It's just like a person that drinks alcohol because he's not happy, after the alcohol clears off, his unhappiness is still waiting for him at one corner. grin

And yes, I'll judge you based on your "more radical approach". tongue cheesy
Lolzz... Okay from the op i could tell the guy in question isn't really used to being with ladies in a certain way. And believe it or not the universe has a way of playing with us but understanding her makes our lives a lot easier & less complicated.. I think its time for him to get out of his shell & get in the rough to understand the different nature of women there is. Do u know a guy that is less experienced with women will most likely make more damaging mistakes if he eventually settles down with a good woman Even if she's an angel sent from above theres only so much she can take b4 she breaks.. What i mean is everything in life happens for a reason everything even this... Our perception & ability to use it to our advantage is what matters.. Its always good to see the silver lining in every dark cloud. Don't be so quick to judge me coz u will be surprised at the kind of person i truly am cheesy

1 Like

Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Flintstone06(m): 8:46am On Jun 18, 2018
majorbravo:
Dude if you can afford it. Travel abroad and see the world. You would still feel pain occasionally but you would definitely overcome the need to have her in your life. This is a quicker option.

Alternatively but most importantly, you must work on becoming a successful man.

Overall, try to focus on your life. You lost her because you prioritised her over your own success in life. Being in this kind of relationship where you idealize your woman, keeps you relaxed in complacency. You have to keep growing as a human being and the false sense of security you have in such relationships usually poison it. It makes you not realise how much you have not grown until the day she gets up and leaves for a man who is everything you should have become but couldn't, cos you took the back seat and got too comfortable in it.

Focus on becoming a better person. Do you usually not worry about fashion or how you look? start investing in fashion and looking good, hit the gym if you can. Can you afford a better house/car, double your hustle and get it. Buy only things that are original and of high quality and look for a job that rewards your strengths and capabilities, or start a business, anything good and worthwhile to get ahead in life. Get better professional qualifications and stop at nothing to become valuable to your society. And when you get there, you would look back and wonder how anyone could even date the former you.

By chance, you would find another guy going through this same thing and see why it never worked out.

As a successful man, you would not have a problem finding a replacement, you would have problems picking, and trust me all of the ladies would be 10 times better quality than that ex.

Best of luck

You are the real MVP
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by geezyk(m): 8:52am On Jun 18, 2018
To love someone and get heartbroken is really a very bad thing, I've never loved anyone more than myself before, and I have numerous gfs to show for it, not till I met this pretty diva, and she completely stole my heart. show that happened, I'll never know, but it did.

What made the heartbreak so tough on me was that I virtually sent away all other girls in order to face this one one completely, well, that was my undoing. That's how far I was willing to go till the unthinkable happened, it took my friends and a rebound girl to take me out of the pit I had fallen into.

The truth of the matter is that, you really fall in love with the person you believe you've seen all you dream of in them, without looking deeper to see their faults.

And sometimes you think they are your ONE and ONLY!

But in my own case she came back begging and we hooked up again, but this time, I held total control.
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Mryacks: 8:58am On Jun 18, 2018
Iammelvin:
Happiness is the consequence of personal effort. You fight for it, strive for it, insist upon it, and sometimes even travel around the world looking for it. You have to participate relentlessly in the manifestations of your own blessings..To be free, he need To Delete all her photos, avoid communication with her, get busy esp with d tins he loves doing, seek God, chase his dreams, avoid peer pressure to re date someone..the hart needs to heal first...As you get over this heartbreak, know that there is something better out there waiting for you.

Good one..

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Just2endowed2(m): 8:59am On Jun 18, 2018
majorbravo:
Dude if you can afford it. Travel abroad and see the world. You would still feel pain occasionally but you would definitely overcome the need to have her in your life. This is a quicker option.

Alternatively but most importantly, you must work on becoming a successful man.

Overall, try to focus on your life. You lost her because you prioritised her over your own success in life. Being in this kind of relationship where you idealize your woman, keeps you relaxed in complacency. You have to keep growing as a human being and the false sense of security you have in such relationships usually poison it. It makes you not realise how much you have not grown until the day she gets up and leaves for a man who is everything you should have become but couldn't, cos you took the back seat and got too comfortable in it.

Focus on becoming a better person. Do you usually not worry about fashion or how you look? start investing in fashion and looking good, hit the gym if you can. Can you afford a better house/car, double your hustle and get it. Buy only things that are original and of high quality and look for a job that rewards your strengths and capabilities, or start a business, anything good and worthwhile to get ahead in life. Get better professional qualifications and stop at nothing to become valuable to your society. And when you get there, you would look back and wonder how anyone could even date the former you.

By chance, you would find another guy going through this same thing and see why it never worked out.

As a successful man, you would not have a problem finding a replacement, you would have problems picking, and trust me all of the ladies would be 10 times better quality than that ex.

Best of luck

Nice
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by sahm4u2nv(m): 9:04am On Jun 18, 2018
InfernoNig:
I cried when my girl broke up with me accusing Mr of cheating. I cried even more when after she pur to bed for another man 5 months later. It was hard for me as we were together for 2years, I passed pretty good pussy for hers. But thank God i am able to move on. First i block her on all social media, to avoid communication with her. Deleted her number so I won't call her, and when someone tries to talk about her I quickly shuuo them before they even mention her name. Its just time. He will get over it
I did exactly this last year, people were tagging me as being childish, now I've moved on perhaps in know what's best for myself
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by hapiness44(f): 9:05am On Jun 18, 2018
The process of getting over someone you once loved is a very slow and difficult one. While people try their best to bring you out of your blues, you still have the memories to hunt you.

1. Let yourself heal, cry if you want to, remember the memories if you want to, never try the cold turkey approach to it, it does not work, it only leads to 'half baked' healing, with time you will be just fine.

2. Don't go into any relationship at the moment, no need to rush into anything, it will only be a rebound and you will end up hurting someone else that might genuinely care about you, enjoy your alone time, your healing time, watch movies, go out and take care of yourself.

3. And when you are fine, you will feel it, might take weeks, months for some people years, but you will be completely fine and ready to give your heart again.

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by IamHopeful(f): 9:11am On Jun 18, 2018
dairykidd:

Lolzz... Okay from the op i could tell the guy in question isn't really used to being with ladies in a certain way. And believe it or not the universe has a way of playing with us but understanding her makes our lives a lot easier & less complicated.. I think its time for him to get out of his shell & get in the rough to understand the different nature of women there is. Do u know a guy that is less experienced with women will most likely make more damaging mistakes if he eventually settles down with a good woman Even if she's an angel sent from above theres only so much she can take b4 she breaks.. What i mean is everything in life happens for a reason everything even this... Our perception & ability to use it to our advantage is what matters.. Its always good to see the silver lining in every dark cloud. Don't be so quick to judge me coz u will be surprised at the kind of person i truly am cheesy

I understand your salient points but, that your approach is still somehow.

From the way the OP stated the kind of brother she has, it's obvious that he's one of those guys that aren't really experienced with ladies so, even if he goes into another relationship without knowing how to behave with ladies, he might still be taken for granted.

Lol @ the kind of person you might be. grin

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Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by dreamchaser14(m): 9:28am On Jun 18, 2018
R

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Flintstone06(m): 9:29am On Jun 18, 2018
AmeLonRo:
A friend said his gf told him he would cry in the morning angrily and his mother died in the evening. What kind of girlfriend is she, does she have some super power?

Please rephrase, I am not understanding what you typed
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by adadioranmah(f): 9:54am On Jun 18, 2018
Celine Dion helps.

You can also Channel your hurt and anger into something positive like reading.
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Omotaday(m): 9:58am On Jun 18, 2018
Flintstone06:


Please rephrase, I am not understanding what you typed
In the morning, a gf angrily told his bf that the bf would cry, then in the evening, the bf's mother died.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Nobody: 10:00am On Jun 18, 2018
IamHopeful:


I understand your salient points but, that your approach is still somehow.

From the way the OP stated the kind of brother she has, it's obvious that he's one of those guys that aren't really experienced with ladies so, even if he goes into another relationship without knowing how to behave with ladies, he might still be taken for granted.

Lol @ the kind of person you might be. grin
Hmmm... Now ur getting close that's why i didn't recommend a relationship but just mingle with girls he finds attractive on a more physical level without emotional attachment to help him understand more. Do u know some guys actually have this idea that every girl they meet is the one.. And then they begin to attach so much, expect so much, stress so much & frustrate the poor girl into thinking there's something wrong with her. Same with some girls too. Normally u meet someone then u start dating to know who they are & what makes them who they are & if u can put up with their bs & beautiful side all together mutually, then gbam! But like i said some people go into relationships assuming u must behave in a certain way & when u fall short of their expectation they start crying foul.. The guy in question needs to get out in the wild & jam all those bad girls when go show am real pepper so he go wise when he meets the good one cheesy

And as for u.. continue laughing at me na tongue
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by mrcoolautofix(m): 10:04am On Jun 18, 2018
It's not funny, perhaps anyone who think it is have no deep connection with people emotionally,

How did we get there? we caused it, life and death is in your tongue, girls are good with using theirs to rain insult on others, gossip and hide their true feelings

But guys use their mouth to chain themselves with this I love you so much, I will always love, I will never disappear but when you are making all this dangerous confession, she was busy listening n mute, it's even hard for her to admit she missed you if she is not up for something dramatic to scavenge you perhaps.
At last your words n confessions is your connection n her power over your mind n life.

The truth is 95% of Nigerian ladies are emotionally detached from guys, they are more emotionally attached to material things.

75% guys are emotionally connected to ladies based on my analytical & statistics,

I have been in this situation for more than 4 times WATCHING my tears walk its track on my face between the age of 19 to 25, I must say its catastrophic when it hit you,

Solutions is not that simple I called it 1 "switch off" 2 #keep off" and 3 #formatting your body"delete everything in your possession that might lead you back to her is just the beginning, don't write it down if you have memorized her number no problem. Delete the rest.

If you want to get out faster, it's crazy but you have to hook up with another girl that is more beautiful than her, even if you will have pay her to keep you intimacy kind of date better just to get you into out of that messy state, bang her like you have never banged your x and stay in contact with her, if she is wants to form busy get another one, this second method is "formatting your system"

that's replacing the worst one with bad one

you get more connected to her from her pussy and words and you will get out of her, and her out of your life from another girls pussy yes you heard me right it's that fucking crazy!

Let's say in case of another person on platonic date who get stocked from breakup, no pro just get an other girl spend more time with her than you spent your x your building on mansion is the fall of another mansion

Erasing her contact pix will help you lessen the reconnecting and refreshing her thoughts inside you, it can get tough when you stay alone so avoid loneliness at all cost if she lives close to you that's worst just get another girl and pound a crap out em
Banging another girl will format her memory inside you

When you see a guy crying over a girl, it's not fake it's beyond the boundaries of flesh and bones

When you see a girl crying over a guy, she is looking for attention, it's 10% chance feeling 90% cos of what she will be loosing after breaking up with her.

Goodluck

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Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Nobody: 10:06am On Jun 18, 2018
adadioranmah:
Celine Dion helps.

You can also Channel your hurt and anger into something positive like reading.
Are u serious shocked Be like u go sabi cry well wel sha... cheesy
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Olayemi244(m): 10:07am On Jun 18, 2018
futurism:

Women generally have what they seek in a man...if they don't see it, bros, nothing you can do that will change the situation

You may be right though.
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by IamHopeful(f): 10:07am On Jun 18, 2018
dairykidd:

Hmmm... Now ur getting close that's why i didn't recommend a relationship but just mingle with girls he finds attractive on a more physical level without emotional attachment to help him understand more. Do u know some guys actually have this idea that every girl they meet is the one.. And then they begin to attach so much, expect so much, stress so much & frustrate the poor girl into thinking there's something wrong with her. Same with some girls too. Normally u meet someone then u start dating to know who they are & what makes them who they are & if u can put up with their bs & beautiful side all together mutually, then gbam! But like i said some people go into relationships assuming u must behave in a certain way & when u fall short of their expectation they start crying foul.. The guy in question needs to get out in the wild & jam all those bad girls when go show am real pepper so he go wise when he meets the good one cheesy

And as for u.. continue laughing at me na tongue

Yeah, we all go into relationships with different expectations. The best thing is to be positive about it and don't expect too much coz you might be knocked down!

Yeah, really LMAO. grin grin grin

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Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by Nobody: 10:17am On Jun 18, 2018
IamHopeful:


Yeah, we all go into relationships with different expectations. The best thing is to be positive about it and don't expect too much coz you might be knocked down!

Yeah, really LMAO. grin grin grin

I like ur mind ...its beautiful.... Hope u know after all that its the real breakfast in bed @dp lipsrsealed
Not looking for any trouble cheesy
Re: How Do You Deal With A Breakup? by kaptaneSaka(m): 10:34am On Jun 18, 2018
Mrs Heartbreaker, Your sons girlfriends is waiting to break his heart countless times...
whizqueen:
I also thought boys don't cry till I saw my Ex bf cry on the day we broke up cry

I still have soft spots for him cos of that.

Tell your brother to man up and let new friends in. Easier said than done but way better than waiting for what's gone. Goodluck to him

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