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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me (9104 Views)
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My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by famziano: 9:13am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Hi Nlanders, I'm sorry to bother you guys with my situation but I need your candid advice to what's happening in my 5 years relationship, now straight to story, I met her when she was 20yrs old then I was 25 (5yrs age gap), we started slowly because I was in 300L in the UNI then, she's always coming to visit me at my brother( I live with my elder bro then) anytime I'm around, she works so she'll see me in the morning before she heads out to work every morning and always see me every evening before she goes back home, she was really in love and I reciprocated well enough, one of those days she slept off in my room(my bro got 2bedroom so I had my own room) I woke her about 30mins later but she told me I shouldn't bother that she'll soon be heading home, I said OK, I went back to the living room watching an Europa match with my bro, 30mins later I noticed there was no sign of her leaving yet so I went back in and met her awake surprisingly, Oh you're awake, time to go look at the time it's already past 9, she looks at me and smile then she said I'm leaving but not now, we should talk, TALK ![]() ![]() PS: I love her and care so much about her, in the past 5yrs we've been through alot together, I'm ready to settle down because everything is place just this issue
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Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by oshe11: 9:19am On Jun 28, 2018 |
I honestly like to advise you oooo but..... Well, she might be avoiding you because of the way you reacted...... And for the bedwetting, it means it has been happening for the past 3years ![]() Well, tell her to Urinate before sleeping, and try to ease her mind Buy a new mattrass for her, FOR NOW with a nylon kinda cover(so she can easily clean it when/if she bedwets) during these periods of trying diff methods to avoid this probs.... And APOLOGISE for "Sparking" 23 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Naijawebmaster: 9:26am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Mhen! Too much unnecessary details in your story. Next time try and go straight to the point! Also edit and paragraph for easier reading. Back to the story. I believe she's avoiding you cos of your negative reaction. It may have nothing to do with spirituality. I guess she went for the programme cos she has nowhere else to go. It's a psychological issue and your help and support will go a long way. Be more supportive and helpful to her in this her situation. Assure her that no matter what, you still love her. Help her build her confidence. All the aforementioned may even make it easier for her to overcome her challenge. Need a reliable and professional website design? Then check my signature No advance payment required 13 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Eberechi24(f): 9:26am On Jun 28, 2018 |
from what you wrote, I understand that she is embarrassed and she sincerely wants solution to her problem give her time since her mum said she in church (trust me her prayer points revolve around this bed wetting you should send her msg encouraging her, assuring her of your love( if you truly love). your msg would lift her soul. 7 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by madridguy(m): 9:27am On Jun 28, 2018 |
I concur with the first to comment. |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by youngberry001(m): 9:28am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Then go pay me letr if i read all dis tin ![]() |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by poshpaul: 9:30am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Humm. Let's wait for the gurus |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Jimi23(m): 9:33am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Tell her to take honey before bedtime. My kids do that and it works. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by famziano: 9:39am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Jimi23: Thank you sir, but she's avoiding me, even if I have a solution for her how do I take her out of hiding ![]() 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by adadike(f): 9:44am On Jun 28, 2018 |
you better tell that yeye girl to be doing kegel exercise. it will not only strengthen her vagina muscle, it will make her very tight too 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by delugajackson: 9:45am On Jun 28, 2018 |
adadike:This comment shows how shallow you are in thinking. Why not tell her to seal off the vagina with super glue? The earlier you stop painting a perfect picture of yourself, the better for you. OP, please know that no one is perfect, and your fiancee is not the cause of her situation. I know you were pissed off, but you shouldn't have lashed out on her. That way you only made things worse, and when depression sets in, then you're going to lose her completely. Apologise to her, draw her close, then you guys can work torwards a lasting solution. Self-awareness on her part is key, light meals and little water before bedtime would help too. If by any chance she's been bedwetting since her teenage years, it's a medical condition, but if she started recently then I believe it's just psychological. 12 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by ivor1(m): 9:46am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Catetherize her every night n remove it in the morning it works like magic thank me later ��� no mind me o |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Jimi23(m): 9:47am On Jun 28, 2018 |
famziano: Call her and let her know its between you both and you have a solution to her problem. Assuring that yoylu still love her that is if you truly still do. |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by famziano: 9:56am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Jimi23: I love her and I've sent her series of texts telling her how much I love her, reminding her our plans for the future, I'm not sure if she's with her phone tho, I'm trying my best to get in touch with her but it seems like she deliberately disconnected with me for reason I don't understand, last time we talked on the phone she said she's looking for solution to her problem, I've apologized about the sparking too |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by austyn0(m): 10:07am On Jun 28, 2018 |
adadike:How is the girl yeye? Aru adikwa gi? 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Massmike(m): 10:19am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Firstly, from what I understood from the desperation she was portraying at the initial stage of your relationship, I feel she has been bed wetting for a very long time not a year like she said. Many things contribute to the pride one has as a woman and it takes just a little thing to take that pride away. bed wetting can be very embarrassing as a teenager talk more an adult. My brother, you have a lot of work to do if you want this to work. first of all you have to help her maintain her pride as a woman. You "sparking" at her was wrong. A woman is happiest when she finds a man who loves her the way she is. You getting angry would have come as a serious shock to her and would have hurt her greatly. So my advice is: firstly try and apologize. let her know you love her the way she is. tell her you are both in this together. A romantic man should know how to continue from here 4 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by famziano: 10:23am On Jun 28, 2018 |
Massmike: Thank you sir, God bless you 3 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by austyn0(m): 10:27am On Jun 28, 2018 |
famziano:I know sometimes we overreact....You shouldn't have raised your voice on her.....Bedwetting is so very embarrassing and worrisome for a grownup,, I can only imagine how low and ashamed she imagines herself in your presence..... Give her time,, keep sending the messages,, search for every sweet and encouraging words you can find and forward it to her,, you can as well tell her you have purposely started bedwetting too sef ![]() On the solution,,she might be going for prayers cuz she thinks it is spiritual,,sometimes it is not spiritual....Most people that urinate constantly bedwets...... I was once a sugar-addicted nigga,, It got to a point I started urinating every 10mins after drinking water till there is nothing left to form urine in my bladder....Sugar causes constant urine and as a result sometimes you see yourself urinating in a dream not knowing that it is happpening real....Urinary bladder size causes it too[I stand to be corrected].... So,, tell her to reduce the way she consumes sugar...There were excercises I read about that prevents constant urine,, she should google it up or you do it for her....Save your girl,, Save your relationship.....All the best man. 3 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by famziano: 10:39am On Jun 28, 2018 |
austyn0: Thank you so much 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by dejialam(m): 10:45am On Jun 28, 2018 |
I remember when i was much younger, i do bedwet then but my grandma came up with a very ridiculous solution which goes thus; Get a hot chalcoal pee on it thats all. I observe ever since then i get this hot sensation to pee even in sleep I will never sleep again till i pee. So tell her to try it, it might work for her too. Thank me later. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by mimimile93: 10:45am On Jun 28, 2018 |
famziano: Op I have seen several girls (big girls) with this issues. Even one of my cousin had bedwet till he reaches 26yrs. We tried evrytin the dude was till bed wettin. Two yrs ago he stops. It just happened. Just have to understand her. As far as she's not cheating on you. Accept her like that. She will stop with time. Bed wettin could be related to medical or the body system but I doubt spirituality aspect of it.. Let her watch her diet |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by adadike(f): 11:01am On Jun 28, 2018 |
austyn0:obu na imaghi na aru adichaghi m |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Xmen149(m): 11:03am On Jun 28, 2018 |
must everything be spiritual and why must u shout,everybody gat problem not being understanding will always make people hide(including their problem)from you worse when they see you as close one. her problem is medical,.weak muscle that cnt hold urine in the sack even at subconscious time(sleep). might be infection,or she z done some funny things(that one is for u to find out),or just week muscle. frequent urination will help,.avoid water close to bedtime and take her to a real doctor abeg. AND BE NICE PLS NO BODY IS 100% OK |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Xmen149(m): 11:08am On Jun 28, 2018 |
mimimile93: YES diet too for instance alot of colored consistent or smelling urine issue is related to age and herbs(garlic,ginger onion). |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Massmike(m): 11:20am On Jun 28, 2018 |
dejialam:can this be considered as a solution? peeing on hot charcoal really! A guy is seriously asking for help not more problems please. |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by MissRaine69(f): 12:03pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
Noctural enuresis as an adult is traumatic for the individual expereincing it, especially based on some of the ill advise here . Going to the toilet or drinking less water is not going to change anything here,finding and treating the cause will.I will give possible causes but without a full examination or knowing her history it is difficult to advise. Here are some of the issues it is not an exhaustive list, 1) Insufficient ADH hormone levels 2)Side effects of medication 3)Overactive bladder (OAB) 4)Blocked urethra 5) Frequent bouts of constipation-women with hypermobility joint syndrome have very poor gut motility and are prone to constipation 6) Sexual trauma 7)Pelvic organ prolapse ![]() 9) Inflamed/infected skene's glands/prostatitis Finally it is also partially psychological , she needs your empathy more than anything and a visit to a gynaecologist . 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by MissRaine69(f): 12:06pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
Massmike: The best comment I have seen on this site for a long time. 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by austyn0(m): 12:48pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
adadike:Bia kam nyeghi ogwu. |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Munzy14(m): 1:16pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
op @famziano You made a great mistake by the spark.you started a great move by helping her seek solution, but you along the line wasted the effort. She is scared/ashamed you may dump her or beat her next time it happens. I had this issue with a lady, All i did was use my knowledge and good advice from my health practicing friends and again boosting of her ego and sound psychological thoughts. You need to make her comfortable so she can relax to open up very well. Again check on stress on her and what she eats. You will have to go meet her. This is not a phone texting issues. Make sacrifice of traveling down to see her. It is a sacrifice to prove your genuine love. You can as well propose if u wish. I bet u it is no spiritual. It is psychological +healthy living issue. It has good solutions. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by Auladimeji2: 1:31pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
This is the first time I'm seen wise comments from Romancelanders. 2 Likes |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by arrestdarrester: 1:33pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
Do the needful if you say you love her. Pay that visit now before someone else take her away from you. Hers is plainly psychological, don't let your reaction throw her into depression 1 Like |
Re: My Fiancée Bedwet, Now She's Avoiding me by mejai(m): 1:55pm On Jun 28, 2018 |
buy her 'poul' encourage her to wake up and use d loo tell her to be able to shout 'devil is a liar', when next she dreams about peeing in d toilet or road side dat dream eh, no medical solution bro, visit her and apologize lastly, send us pics of introduction ooo 1 Like |
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