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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / The Sadness Within (1630 Views)
My Christmas In Sadness And Pain... / Thread To Discuss Your Sadness At Not Marrying Your Ex. / Pls Help, My Happiness Is About To Be Turn To Sadness (2) (3) (4)
The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 7:23am On Jul 03, 2018 |
Hello Family. I had to create this new moniker as this is personal to me. I got married four years ago but separated from my husband about two years ago because of domestic violence. We had no children in the two years of marriage. I would have started the divorce proceedings but lost my job last year and not so buoyant to get a lawyer. I had everything going on for me. I got a job a year after service and was paid well. Got married at 25. I am 29 now and I feel so sad. I don't know if i should call it depression but I feel sad within my soul. How could everything just crash? How do people have the courage to start over? I have been applying for jobs but nothing has come yet even though I have five years experience. I do not want to break down. I am trying to be strong. I used to be strong and intelligent but I am not sure I can say that now. Please I just need advice from my nairaland family. 1 Like |
Re: The Sadness Within by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:30am On Jul 03, 2018 |
BE STRONG. YOU HAVE A BRIGHT FUTURE AHEAD OF YOU. THINGS WILL TUEN AROUND FOR THE BEST SOON. PLEASE HOLD ON. |
Re: The Sadness Within by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:33am On Jul 03, 2018 |
You lost THE job you had later? You didn't talk about that part. Noteasilybroken: |
Re: The Sadness Within by crackhaus: 7:35am On Jul 03, 2018 |
You got out of a violent marriage with no kids produced to keep connecting you to him or to reduce the number of suitors who would have had reservations about dating a single mom, and you're depressed? ![]() You're a winner my friend. Dust yourself up and change your mindset. No one is going to employ a woman with visible signs of depression who will not be productive and add value to his team, doesn't matter the years of experience you have. 12 Likes |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 7:37am On Jul 03, 2018 |
post=69035272:I got a job before I got married. I lost it last year. Spent five years on the job. 2 Likes |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 7:38am On Jul 03, 2018 |
post=69035215:Thank you so much. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 7:39am On Jul 03, 2018 |
crackhaus: ![]() 1 Like |
Re: The Sadness Within by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:56am On Jul 03, 2018 |
Noteasilybroken:YOU are welcome. It will end in praise! 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: The Sadness Within by crackhaus: 8:01am On Jul 03, 2018 |
Noteasilybroken:Unless you spent five years there and learnt nothing, then you have no problem. Keep applying for jobs IN PERSON, not sending CV through the internet or through people - go to places and show them you know what you're doing. Meanwhile, I hope you're a beautiful woman.. at least you can't say raising kids has stressed you out and made you look like akpu wey dem soak for water. Dress up and look good, let there be an air of confidence about you and people will naturally be drawn to you. You're still less than 30years of age with five years experience in one steady job, that's prime candidacy most HRMs look out for. You'll be fine, just get your mind right. 4 Likes |
Re: The Sadness Within by Nobody: 8:42am On Jul 03, 2018 |
Where do you live, big city? Do you have friends & family, do you like mingling with them or do you like quiet? What do you do during the day? Do you sleep well. Can you move to a different environment? The psychologists say the amount of human connection we have determines how healthy we are. Good luck. |
Re: The Sadness Within by bukatyne(f): 9:04am On Jul 03, 2018 |
Noteasilybroken: Why are you depressed? Search yourself well. Is it guilt that you had a hand in the breakdown of your marriage? Regret that despite your sacrifices it didn't work out? That you are currently not financially bouyant? That you are now single? One evening, just think through yourself truthfully and try to pin point what the issue is. Then you work towards resolution because if what is eating you up is the fact that you are jobless and you are attending dates in search of another husband, you will still feel depressed and vice versa. Goodluck and stay strong. 1 Like |
Re: The Sadness Within by boldx(m): 9:42am On Jul 03, 2018 |
Isaiah 54vs 1 (New Living Translation) "Sing, O childless woman, you who have never given birth! Break into loud and joyful song, O Jerusalem, you who have never been in labor. For the desolate woman now has more children than the woman who lives with her husband," says the LORD. |
Re: The Sadness Within by KanwuliaExtra: 5:44pm On Jul 03, 2018 |
Life is tough, no guarantees in any aspect. You have to be tougher. No job? A failed marriage? Only 29? You are too young to give up. Think less and act more! Depression is real. ![]() 3 Likes |
Re: The Sadness Within by Ademat7(m): 8:02pm On Jul 03, 2018 |
*never promise things will be easy but you need to rise above your level of input *join a social group or a unit in your place of worship(you will meet cheerful people) *teaching helps too(teach someone anything you know) |
Re: The Sadness Within by lordOM(m): 8:55pm On Jul 03, 2018 |
My story is worst than yours but I have told myself that I cant give up.Depression creeps in slowly than you will recognise but very hard to fight off.Tell yourself it's late to fail,get closer to your family,confide in God and tell him your problems,do things that make you happy and lastly start looking for jobs aggressively. I have been in your shoes and I know it's not easy but I am gradually coming out of it.If you need a friend to talk to,i'm available. 1 Like |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:50am On Jul 04, 2018 |
crackhaus:Thank you so much. I would take your advice. Thank you. |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:51am On Jul 04, 2018 |
effnepa:I would think thoroughly about your points. Thank you so much. |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:52am On Jul 04, 2018 |
bukatyne:I am already looking inwards from tonight. Thank you very much. |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:53am On Jul 04, 2018 |
post=69035811:Amen ![]() 1 Like |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:54am On Jul 04, 2018 |
boldx:I have keyed into this verse. Thank you so much . |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:55am On Jul 04, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Thank you so much. I won't give up. ![]() |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:55am On Jul 04, 2018 |
Ademat7:Thank you so much for your advice. I would adhere to every one of them. |
Re: The Sadness Within by Noteasilybroken(f): 12:56am On Jul 04, 2018 |
lordOM:Yes I need a friend. I sent you an email request. Please how do I contact you? |
Re: The Sadness Within by KanwuliaExtra: 4:26am On Jul 04, 2018 |
Noteasilybroken: You have the world in your hands. Just take one day and step at a time. You do not need to solve the biggest problems in life to feel a pang or load of relief. Just make it a point of duty to sleep VERY WELL every night. No matter how things may look at the monent. Nothing lasts for ever. It is well. ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: The Sadness Within by crackhaus: 5:57pm On Jul 04, 2018 |
Noteasilybroken:You're welcome ![]() |
Re: The Sadness Within by Chubhie: 7:12pm On Jul 04, 2018 |
Be happy for no reason. Difficult? Then, there's a high probability you would still feel same even with a good job and a man to cuddle at nights. I trust you've learnt enough from your first marriage and job. Apply the lessons going forward. Build support not on humans but on principles and values and learn to self motive. Think out of the box if the job ain't coming. Well paid the last five years? You should have some resources to get creative with.You can also volunteer your free time to some NGO's and spend time attending to motherless babies. You would get a positive change in perception. 1 Like |
Re: The Sadness Within by bukatyne(f): 10:31pm On Jul 04, 2018 |
Noteasilybroken: You are welcome. Just be true to yourself during your soul searching. Even if it's something you feel 'ashamed' to confide in others or it's not 'politically correct', be true to yourself. Then you sieve out those against your morals and pursue those aligned with them. |
Re: The Sadness Within by Viking007(m): 8:27am On Jul 05, 2018 |
KanwuliaExtra:Well written. |
Re: The Sadness Within by Faybaby(f): 9:38am On Jul 05, 2018 |
you need to be prayerful cos there is nothing that God cannot do and I want to let you know that there are some women out there that is experiencing something worse but they never give up.atleast it is privilege that you are educated and enlightened so my dear never you ever allow such a thing to weigh you down. |
Re: The Sadness Within by realtalk19: 4:37am On Jul 06, 2018 |
U still have a chance to start afresh. U are lucky no kids involved. I had same experience and am left with 2 cute blessings I appreciate each day. It's not easy for me as a single mum but I feel happier and lucky to be alive. If I can move on and look good then u too can. Snap out of ur depressed state, package ur CV and be positive in all ur thoughts that u wil get a job. U can't stay indoors and expect a job or a nyc looking prince charming to locate u. U nid to engage in activities that wil kip ur mind occupied from worrying. Some lady didn't live to tell the story or av d opportunity you have. When u hear some people's domestic violence story then u Wil thank God for surviving' through it. Wish u all the best |
Re: The Sadness Within by Ademat7(m): 4:10pm On Jul 06, 2018 |
realtalk19:Na wa o |
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