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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason (1926 Views)
I Don't Want My Mother To Come For My Omugwo / My Mother's Friend Advised My Mother To Disown Me / Nigerian Man Flies His Mother To US, She Sheds Tears Of Joy, Refuses To Sleep (2) (3) (4)
Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Xampleofgodgrac: 7:24pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
I am the only female child with 3 brothers but the last born is late and the first is not for my father, my mum had him for another man before marrying my dad. When my step brother got married to his wife, we all liked her but she always look down on me just because I was jobless then (but now God is surprising her by blessing me) and my mum always support her in everything she does. My growing up with my mum was not good at all because she see me as a threat(I don't know why) I rather confide On stranger than confiding on my mum, we never have mother to daughter talk like telling me about menstruation and other things I should know. My first period was very embarrassing because i don't know anything about it but thanks to my teacher that lectured me. Long story cut short, after 2years my step brother married his wife, there was no pregnancy and I do remember him in my prayers because as a Christian i don't hold grudges. Of course she has really hurt me by telling my mum that her Husband has no sister and my mum told me to my face just because I was very very broke then. But their words challenged me to learn a skill and God had been good to me. My mum forgot I was giving her money when I was working in bank ( I just want you to know the kind of mother I have). So I had a dream that my step brother wife gave birth which I called her and told her, she just told me thank you. After like 2 months, a cousin told me she is heavily pregnant and will soon give birth. I was like what stopped this girl from telling me that "God has done it" when I told her about the dream I had. Instead she kept it from me and when I called my mum to tell her that am pained because my step brother wife hide her pregnancy from me, my mum said "must you know? Abi don't you know it is not good for everyone to know someone is pregnant" I was very sad. That's how they gave birth to 3 kids and I only get to know any time they give birth. Now God answered my prayer and made me pregnant again after 7years And that same mother that said it is not good for everyone to know when one is pregnant is now spreading it and even told my step brother and his wife without my permission just because I let her know so that she will stop thinking about my brother that died recently. I remember how my OWN MOTHER treated me during my first child omugwo that I vow that I rather employ a stranger to take care of me after I deliver this baby rather than allow my mum to come and give me heart attack again. Before my mum came for the omugwo, there's this old woman I always buy soup ingredient from in the market and not that I do give the woman anything but I always patronise her. when the woman heard I gave birth she called to ask if my mum has come and I told her no. That night she came, bath my baby and was so caring because I had tears inside and outside, so she was pampering me and she spent 3 days in our house before my mum came. she will pet me to eat even when I don't have appetit and won't sleep at night to watch my baby, instead she will tell me to sleep. But as for my mum, reverse is the case. if she prepare food and I tell her that I need spicy food and she should add more pepper, she will get angry. in the morning she won't ask what I will eat lai lai, instead she will ask our last born she came with and will make sure that that one eat before even looking at my face. But I forgave her all this and still respect her as my mother My pregnancy is already 5months and am always having body pain. It is my husband that do bath and prepare my 7 years old son for school and atimes he run my business for me. Now my mother want to travel with my step brother wife and my mum is suggesting my step brother wife should bring her first child ( a kid of 4years) to stay with me while they travel. Honestly it won't be easy but how do I tell my mum that the little boy will need a care which am too weak to give because of my present condition And she knows I don't have nanny or anyone living with me. How will I tell her without reading meaning to it. Please I need your sincere advise, thanks for reading |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:28pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Hmmmm, this is deep. There is no 'how' to tell her : JUST TELL HER albeit in a polite way. Stop making life complicated for yourself. Wishing you safe delivery. 10 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Oyindidi(f): 7:35pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
If you are weak and you can't take care of the little boy. Look her in the eyes and say sorry mama, I can't help out in a polite way. My own mother can't trouble me like a witch. I'll kick her out of my life. 5 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:38pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Oyindidi: Kick her out of your life? It's easier said than done sis. Mothers are GOLDEN. There is always this soft spot for them no matter what.......atleast 99% of the time! You former comment: we concur! 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by EfemenaXY: 7:38pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Long, tiresome, and incomprehensible write up that makes little sense. ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Oyindidi(f): 7:48pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
post=69256782:Hmmmm... I mean what I said. Life is too short for a woman to torment me. My Mother love and care for us like babies till date. Even with that when she do something that didn't go down well, I will tell her to her face not to do it again. Last year she gave me a terrible advice and in tears I told her I was expecting her to support me and give me strength in what I was battling then. As I dey cry, she started petting and all those things mothers do. I mean it when I said that. 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by IFNOTGOD(m): 7:51pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
EfemenaXY: TALK UR OWN WHEN MAKE SENSE, IF U CANT OFFER D ADVISE DAT WONT COST U DONT INSULT HER COS IT MAY COST HER 12 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:52pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Oyindidi:Awwww, cute. We get your point now. God bless our mothers. Immeasurable jewel they are. |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by MANNABBQGRILLS: 7:53pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
EfemenaXY:Eh ya! ![]() 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by EfemenaXY: 7:54pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
IFNOTGOD: Where’s the insult? It’s a statement of fact! The @op’s writeup is incomprehensible - and yours is just as bad. |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Oyindidi(f): 7:54pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
post=69257160:Amen! 1 Like |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by chiommy123(f): 7:56pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
you just have to tell her and she can read whatever meaning she wants to read into it |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by IFNOTGOD(m): 7:57pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
EfemenaXY: thank you sir, now go to the bank and deposit the English to increase ur account balance. since u cant comprehend den let her be or were u forced to comment? who ur grammar help? abi grammar dey increase account balance? if u no know wetyn to talk guy lock up n hide ur face 8 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by kkc1: 8:00pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Enigma! A true mother wouldn't effectuate those things you scribbled. Although, I am not unawares of nefarious things happening these days, but a mother who went through the pains in child bearing , would always cry a river if her child is slightly hurt. In connection, I wouldn't say she hates you, but I think she is being protective, if truly she is your mother. In encapsulation, you need to have heart-to-heart tête-a-téte with your mother, and remember, obedience remains the priceless virtue. |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Betakeshi: 8:02pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
You have to be selfish sometimes....think of you now. If anything happened, who would take care of your kids... |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by delishpot: 8:03pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Tell them you too are not chanced to care for him na. Anything hard for there? 1 Like |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by EfemenaXY: 8:03pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
IFNOTGOD: This is a public forum and I comment wherever I deem fit, thank you. If the @op really needs help, the least she can do is put some effort into her write up. And yes, the grammar is bad. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any worse, you come along with an even more atrocious write up! Seriously, what is it with Nigerian youths like you defending the indefensible?? Don’t you feel embarrassed? This is unforgivably disgraceful! 3 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by dingbang(m): 8:11pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Fvck everybody... |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by crackhaus: 10:02pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
Your mother has no respect for you, that's the underlying issue here not hatred. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by IFNOTGOD(m): 10:03pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
EfemenaXY: last time I checked u don't pay my bills n if u have anything tangible doing u won't b speaking English have u ever seen d advert of a Ferrari on TV cos those who buy it don't sit in front of a TV now d proverb simply means if English pays ur bill it doesn't pay mine n try to get a life instead of looking for loopholes in other people's English beta still take d corrections to d pharmaceutical store n buy ursef some drugs to aid ur thinking ability 6 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Xampleofgodgrac: 10:13pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
I want to thank everyone for your advises and may almighty God bless you richly. Efemanaxy I will appreciate it if you correct me than insulting me, I studied engineering and not English. No one knows it all so you can correct my mistakes. God bless you all 4 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Xampleofgodgrac: 10:14pm On Jul 10, 2018 |
IFNOTGOD:sir, please it is ok you don't need to reply her again. Thank you 3 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Nobody: 7:57am On Jul 11, 2018 |
Xampleofgodgrac: You are a grown woman, tell her you simply can not take the child in at the moment. I can not for the life of me understand how this is a problem. Except she is feeding you, or you are one of those people pleasers that cares about being liked. Tell her the truth and move on.., why will you give someone else the power to make you miserable? I don’t understand! 9 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by milemimi93(m): 9:06am On Jul 11, 2018 |
Oyindidi: Scum |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Oyindidi(f): 9:08am On Jul 11, 2018 |
milemimi93: ![]() |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by thorpido(m): 9:12am On Jul 11, 2018 |
Just tell her you won't be able to care for the boy in your present state.If she likes,let her not come for Omugwo again. *Is there something peculiar about your conception,Op?Is your dad your real dad?Were you adopted? I heard this last weekend of a girl whose mother hates her because she was conceived on the night her father forcefully slept with the mother. |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by ImaIma1(f): 10:01am On Jul 11, 2018 |
post=69256782: It is because you are a man and your mum is able to manipulate you with emotional blackmail. But she can't do same with her daughters because they are also women and they also understand the act of manipulation too. It doesn't mean we don't love our mums. A mum might misbehave in her son's house but will behave herself in her daughter's house. 4 Likes |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by blesskewe(f): 6:31pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
You can not come and kill yourself and die Just tell her no in a. Polite way 1 Like |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Wilfredpat22(f): 6:36pm On Jul 11, 2018 |
Tell her you don’t a any it’s not by force to have a mother You have to ‘Man’ up and cut all ties with her temporary. She will die someday and you are still whining |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Tallesty1(m): 7:07am On Jul 13, 2018 |
thorpido:This may not be the case here but my spirit tells me that what she's passing through is one of the disadvantages of marrying a single mother. Weird right? Many people just don't know it but I grew up with a woman who was a single mom before she met her husband so I can relate to what the op is saying. Coincidentally, the child in her second marriage is also a girl. 3 three things could be responsible for the way she treats the op. 1. She loved the other man to a fault and still sees him in the child she had for him, so deep down she believes that whatever she does for his son, she's indirectly doing it for his father. All the attention, care and love that the op's step brother is enjoying are meant for her mother's ex husband. The child is just a lucky representative. 2. The other man treated her like trash and the only good thing she got from him is this son of hers so she's being extra nice to her only consolation price. How God wired women is something that he will really need to explain to us when we finally get there. 3. The op is either suffering for something that her own father did to her mom or she's just possessed by the spirit of Jabez. |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by Eketem: 9:45am On Jul 13, 2018 |
Unfortunately society decides that mothers are perfect little gods and if you are unfortunate to have a mother with issues who treats you like crap they refuse to believe you and insist you should tolerate and manage her like they tell women to manage abusive relationships. There is a dangerous level of freedom that comes from not caring about what people say or think. If your mother makes you miserable cut her out of your life this is also regarding every other toxic relationship, you came to this life alone don't let anybody make you miserable because you have a biological relationship with them. I was in your shoes I cut mine off, I went through worse pepper in my vagi-na, hitting me with bottle all sorts of curses and she was very angry when I made a good class of degree despite her curses she was telling people I must have slept my way. When I started looking for jobs and struggling after school, selling snacks, doing 5000 jobs etc she was telling people that I must be sleeping around in Abuja, when I finally started becoming succesful she was still bad mouthing me, when I met my husband she was still running him down saying he is a broke man and I will be feeding him, I warned her sternly and cut her off the wedding planning I only saw her on the wedding day which she planned to even make bad for me by dressing up in bad clothes and appearing like a househelp unfortunately for her my husband was from an extremely rich family just very humble the wedding was very big and she was now ashamed of herself then she now started trying to claim it was her prayers for me that worked somebody who only cursed me and said bad things about me. When I was pregnant she started making moves to come I refused totally I knew how to take care of babies after staying with my sister so I didn't need her, I didn't want any toxic situation in my house. Now she is the one trying to build a relationship, she first didn't want to admit how nasty she treated me but I told her unless she admits and apologises we will have no relationship. It is now she is starting to accept the level of hurt she hurt me and I am slowly trying to forgive and let go though I cannot have a close relationship with her my trust is gone. Once I told her I had vaginal discharge next she is telling everybody I had STD when I was still a virgin so it is hard for me to ever trust her 1 Like |
Re: Is It Possible For My Mother To Just Hate Me For No Reason by ArinzeRaph: 9:17am On Jul 14, 2018 |
i don't beg to associate with any fvcking body in this life. if you give me trouble, i will give you double trouble and add disrespect as bonus. fvck everybody !! |
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