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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" (58203 Views)
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Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Funkybabee(f): 9:39am On Aug 06, 2018 |
I think u Don't like her daughter from the begining as I look but u don't have option rather to take that child!! |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by MsGood(f): 9:39am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Aquariann:Well, we women are not all irresponsible. But I don't support abortion when a mistake is made. And I don't even support premarital sex. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Aquariann: 9:41am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Odobopa: But her own bio dad can't inconvenience himself, his marriage or make those sacrifices for his own seed? You guys need to face reality please. She won't do it for him yet she wants him to do it for her. The father should take his responsibility end off. I have a step elder-sister, and my parents have been married for more than 35 years and I've never seen her mom only on pictures. Till date she's closer to my mom than our dad. And if there's any lesson I learned from him was for me to always accept and face my responsibilities as a man. The child should go back to her father end off. 4 Likes |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Immacula8(m): 9:42am On Aug 06, 2018 |
In a country like South Africa where I reside. I would say that one has to thread with caution with respect to single mothers. I personally know a couple of naija guys who were destroyed emotionally and financially after falling to 'take the child in' syndrome. Some of these so called single mums are too beautiful, they are smart and very experienced making it difficult for an average guy to turn them away. A Cameroonian friend of mine died in car accident of recent. The so called wife (single mum) was a busy body all over SA. She has already or in the process of collecting money from road accident fund been the legal wife while my pal is already 6 ft under. Another trick they use is to give you a child immediately they step into your life. Thereafter their true colours start manifesting. A word of advice to brothers in SA. Shine your eyes. 3 Likes |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by SUPERPACK: 9:43am On Aug 06, 2018 |
revolt:so its better to stay with the stepmother and become a maid or maltreated as an unwanted, what makes you think the real father will nt get sexually attracted to he?. her real mother cannot abandon her in trying times like dis. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Nobody: 9:45am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NCANTaskForce:HahahahahahahhaaahHH, SAVAGE!!! . |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by adontcare(f): 9:46am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Gabbysky:what if it is d man's child? Do u think d man will even plead with his wife before forcing d child down her throat? As for me, if I realised dat my husband won't accept my child out of wedlock under dis circumstances, I will back out of d marriage. because d child did not come to d world by herself, and I will also report her dad to welfare to support in her upbringing. Who marriage help if u one cannot bear each other burdens? 2 Likes |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by larrybee2017(f): 9:46am On Aug 06, 2018 |
SUPERPACK:God bless you for this but my question is what happen to the real father? Does that mean he no longer want to be responsible for the upkeep of the poor child or what. I'll advice you get a good lawyer first for future purpose. Let him be summon to know why he decide to bring the child back. And if he refuse to show up adopt her. You never can tell, gold are the most despise but after much labour from goldsmith they are cherish by all. Ensure you get all you need legally before you take up responsibility of the child so you won't loose at the end. God bless you |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by mercyymai(f): 9:47am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NairalandFAYOSE: U dey annoy me seriously! They call her after one, u over look all their complain and married her. Now u can't stand for her becos she is bring her daughter whc is not intentional. Bros!!! Fear God o |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by 1759King: 9:52am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NairalandFAYOSE:When you married a woman with a child, you automatically became a father to that child, call it step-father or whatever but you became a father! There are no two ways about this, you will have to take the child in and for your own good and for posterity sake, treat her as if she's the fruit of your loins - you won't go wrong this way. Issues may arise but at the long run you will be happy you did. Now what you should be weary of and concerned about should be the girl's biological father - what's his body language? Do you suspect he's trying to reconnect with his estranged girlfriend (your wife)? This is where you can shoot for a proper legal adoption of the girl and also ensure your wife won't be gullible to the antics of the man trying to sneak back into her life. While I respect women so much, but often a time you wonder how they reason when a man who once deceived them will come back into their life and they will be willing to throw away the beautiful things they already built for themselves. The only wrong you will do in this situation is when you refuse to let mother and daughter be together, she's being humble now and begging you but she will resent you so much if you refuse. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by SUPERPACK: 9:53am On Aug 06, 2018 |
drakeli:read inbetween the line, the man is wants to move on, since the new wife is nt accepting to take the child as hers. as for stealing it means all the adopted children in the world are stolen since one of the parents might still be alive. i advice him like that because the Op was thinking of what will happen if his dad comes back in future. 1 Like |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by kenoyad: 9:55am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NairalandFAYOSE:people's opinion of you doesn't matter including family members, don't mind them, they are just being social not moral. I think it's better you allow the girl in your house and show her love and compassion that she deserves. also, take appropriate steps in order to avoid issues with her father in the near future cause a man that jettison her own daughter cause he's marrying another woman is not a man enough and could be funny afterwards. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by ussy09(m): 9:55am On Aug 06, 2018 |
while doing all d necessary legal documentation to adopt the gal, ensure that her real father is aware so he wont wake up some day to claim her some children r blessing you knw. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by adontcare(f): 9:57am On Aug 06, 2018 |
mercydaniel:simple and short. I will leave with my daughter. Under dis circumstances. Instead for my child to be homeless, I will waka pass 1 Like |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by cocoboss(m): 10:00am On Aug 06, 2018 |
foolish guy, of all the good advice from geunuine souls he cnt take none smelling momma boy |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Aquariann: 10:01am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Netanyahu1: Alpha fvcks, Beta Bucks.. What an insult. He put a roof over her head, fathered her three other children and doesn't abdicate his fatherly duties. He is not a real man all these years. But your twisted idea of him being a real man is accepting responsibilities of another child whose biological dad is hale, healthy, alive and capable to take care of her but chooses not to because he wants to be with another woman (who also rejected the child). Sorry bro, a real man doesn't raise another man's kid while that other one is alive and capable. Stop the emotional blackmail. 3 Likes |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by adontcare(f): 10:01am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Somerville:did u read where d girls dad rejected her and her grand mum also gave them 3 days to get d child away from her?. It is better for d op not to marry his wife again than to render a baby homeless because of an irresponsible father and a selfish grandma |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Codes151(m): 10:01am On Aug 06, 2018 |
This is the most childish thing I have read... U met her and u knew she had a child. U want her to leave her kid?? U dey kraze or what.. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by ladygudhead(f): 10:03am On Aug 06, 2018 |
revolt:I am entitled to my opinion just as u are entitled to this immature talk u just spout here, though yours lack prudence. Get wisdom,get understanding. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by galantjoe(m): 10:05am On Aug 06, 2018 |
reyscrub: |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by adontcare(f): 10:06am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Donjazzy12:Mr man, if it is ur own child, will u allow her be homeless because ur wife don't want ur own blood. and a baby at that to be abandoned? I don't think so. Get small sense small na |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by PrimadonnaO(f): 10:07am On Aug 06, 2018 |
derrydinny: You're wicked. Always keep this at the back of your mind. Wicked! |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by galantjoe(m): 10:07am On Aug 06, 2018 |
reyscrub: You did a very wrong thing to use someone else blood as your firstborn. Abominations. Instead adopt him as your child not as a firstborn since you have a male child. It portend danger for posterity to come. Your ancestor will be angry for you 1 Like |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by adontcare(f): 10:10am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Aquariann:dat is where welfare come in. Her mother should report him to d welfare for him to be responsible for her up keep |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by sweetv(f): 10:10am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NairalandFAYOSE:for you to say this,u are too childish even though you are matured,now ur family decides who you marry after she have given you too kids of your own,OGA a man will leave his father and mother and become One with his wife,her problems are urs too,y sounding like u don't even love this woman in question, DAT baby is from her lions y founding it hard to take d baby,be matured and reason like one,some parents even adopt unknown children in order to give a home to the homeless.....give that child a home or you regret it d rest of ur life |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Missonas(f): 10:11am On Aug 06, 2018 |
Na wa for your wife's mum oh. She's her grandchild. Y'all be letting that child feel unwanted not cool. You and your wife should reach level ground on this. For kids is a lot to handle these days if shes not working she as to start something. Soon you'll not feel awkward about that child childeen grow on u fast |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Nobody: 10:18am On Aug 06, 2018 |
chronique: That he knows his wife won't take it if he was in the same situation is balderdash. For a woman who has a child outside of wedlock to think that way doesnt ake sense to me. Also, the woman is humble. He said so himself. Now he's trying to paint her in a character that is false just to gain sympathy. I just hope he makes the right choice eventually. When you say you love someone its not just mere talk. You actually want to see them happy. You take steps to make them happy. You make sacrifices. That's what love is. Not mouth. Give me a humble woman anyday, anytime and I'll lay my world at her feet. But most men today will start feeling like KingKong (yes I'm old) when their woman is humbled by circumstances of life. 3 Likes |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Tinamoore(f): 10:20am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NairalandFAYOSE: Sir, so many advises have been proffered to you since last night you made this post but at the end of the day the final decision lies solely on you. Don't be too sure your woman won't take it if its the other way round.even if she won't take it, you must not behave insensitively like her.like I said in my earlier post, do unto others as you would like them to do unto you. Not the way you perceive they will do unto you. Some people here stated that the girl may not remember the sacrifices you made in the future.even if it comes to that, thank God you have your own biological children.you are not accepting her that she must be there for you in your old age or that she is your responsibility.you are accepting her because she is your wife's flesh and blood, because she deserves all the love she can get and because you are a human with conscience. Don't let the irrational behaviour of this girls biological father affect your decision.rather see it that it could have been your own daughter in this "unwanted" situation. I know it may be hard for you because it wasn't the initial plan.but please for the sake of your wife and her innocent daughter, reconsider your decision. If you need more time to emotionally prepare yourself into accepting this girl, discuss it with your wife.I wish you well. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Getsaved(m): 10:22am On Aug 06, 2018 |
reyscrub: Great advise you have up there form the OP. Great indeed.This is one of the few cases I have seen in NL where a really confused friend is given and helped with gracious advise. Good bless you all who gave mature advise. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Deandean: 10:23am On Aug 06, 2018 |
NairalandFAYOSE: Bros leave all this hypocritics,your concern and seeking advice are enough evidence you have feelings n forethoughts....ordinarily u jst cld have dismissed d idea without much consideration...Having said that,my take is simple,in the game of alpha supremacy, d weaker man his forced by society n womanly manipulations to take responsibility for the damage done by the stronger....that you even married a single mother is enough mistep...DO NOT TAKE THE CHILD even if u have the financial means to do so...its better not to do it than to do it in bitterness towards d child n d mother throughout ur marital life... TAKE THE CHILD only if u can do wat d first commentator said,n get a restraining order to stop the father from ever showing up...and have him sign d order...or dont take d child |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by pathogen: 10:24am On Aug 06, 2018 |
baba abeg take the child. if you treat her well, you would have only done yourself good by having another daughter. take care of her, you would be glad you did walahi. |
Re: "My Wife Wants To Bring Her 7-Year-Old Girl She Had Before We Met To My Home" by Somerville: 10:28am On Aug 06, 2018 |
adontcare: If the owner of the child could reject his own blood, then the OP is not obliged in anyway to bring her to his house. Don't get me wrong, I'm not insensitive, just been real. If the OP later decides to bring the kid to his house, it won't be out of love, it'll be out of pity, and I hate being pitied. |
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