Go and watch Acrimony

Iamgrey5:
Relationship is about love

Love is about trust.

So op.

if you cannot trust someone enough to lend them an exhaustible commodity like money, then you shouldn't stick around to entrust such a person with the rest of your life.

Deep

Tamarapetty:
t. . . If reverse was the case now, girls here would blast the dude of being stingy to help his babe. Smh



Well, aunty i won't advice u to give him all ur life savings, just lend him 400 to 500k, like u said: u were the one who asked him bout his probs, tell him to manage the little u can give. I'm sure he'd be grateful

U have sense..... you are the only woman here who has talked sense, okare!

If reverse is the case she wouldn't even be asking for a loan she would expect the guy to give her 700k outright.

When your man sets u up with millions and send s you to dubai he is being caring but when he also need an helping hand he becomes a gold digger.

Indi ala! Some people women are.

Tamarapetty:
t. . . If reverse was the case now, girls here would blast the dude of being stingy to help his babe. Smh



Well, aunty i won't advice u to give him all ur life savings, just lend him 400 to 500k, like u said: u were the one who asked him bout his probs, tell him to manage the little u can give. I'm sure he'd be grateful

U have sense..... you are the only woman here who has talked sense, okare!

If reverse is the case she wouldn't even be asking for a loan she would expect the guy to give her 700k outright.

When your man sets u up with millions and send s you to dubai he is being caring but when he also need an helping hand he becomes a gold digger.

Indi ala! Some women are.

KMSunshine:


Dayum sis.. Shit must have hit you real hard like a roller-coaster �

Naaaaa far from that. Perhaps u should go get glasses.

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

It's okay to help him, but don't do more than you can. If you know 720k is alot and you can't let go if he doesn't pay back, just lend him the one you can forget. But please help him, he needs you now than ever.

BrokenCock:
I know! Ode

Morōn

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

In case this story is true...


Please I repeat,Please don't give him 700k, Except his life is in danger based on health issues.

The main reason is that u don't ever give out ur entire life savings no matter where luv carry u go. Explain to him that u will assist him wit whatever by giving him maybe 350k - 400k. Both of u together can hussle for the rest. Even an insane human cannot give out everything he or she has.

This is life, Not a movie.

yazz09:
You are not obliged to lend him the exact amount he asked. Give him what you are comfortable with and tell him that's what you can part with as you still have other personal and business things that needs your funds

Great advice. Give an amount you can afford to lose.

Someone borrowed money from me over two years ago. I decided to give him a bit less. He didn't even say what he needed the money for. I wanted to give half but later decided to give him two-third of it.

My people, till today he has not even mentioned it again. I even almost forgot until a relative reminded me lately.

Fact is I never planned to take the money back from him BUT wanted to see his attitude towards money. I just needed him to show some courtesy.

Since that two years, I'd have already gifted him an amount close to that anyway. But since he borrowed that money, I stopped those periodic/regular gifts.

He's nice & helpful when needed to do leg work.

When it comes to money do not be pushed to give to much. Any business can fail.

highqueen:

because several ladies have fallen victim of such circumstance which didnt go down well at the end

So I'm right, if i accuse you of hasty generalisation.

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

. get a clear confirmation from your pastor or imam first!

[color=#990000][/color] hmmm. Any relationship apart from marriage isn't yet genuine. But in case he knows your net worth,lend him the money.

Colourich:
I will only do that for my immediate family.

And you don't expect to meet a man who would lay down his life for you , right?

No trust, no love

Ximenez:
So I'm right, if i accuse you of hasty generalisation.

you can call whatever you want, if the op is foolish enough, she should also donate her life

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
Naaaaa far from that. Perhaps u should go get glasses.

Oops seems I forgot my eye drop in the kitchen..

I don't understand this kind of advice sef

U said maybe he saw your account balance

Wat if he want to know if you can loose all you got to save his

If u two truly i mean truly understand each other

I don't think you would b here seeking advice

Meet him after dinner and tell him how much u'v got.. If after telling him Nd he still insist. u will b left with no other option than to trust him and give to him

On the oda hand

If he truly care for you and your business he wouldn't want you to go bankrupt

He might reduce the amount to something u can afford to loose

donstan18:
When it comes to their turn to help a man financially, they'll remember [What if, What about, Sacrifice, Risky, Should I, Shall I, Shall we, Shall should, Shall us, Shall him, Shall she, Shall shim]

He helped your business stood its ground without asking if the risk was worth doing for a girlfriend, and here you are, calculating and warring the gravity of his sacrifice and the one he's asking of you. Sacrifice is sacrifice. Do it if you want, and if you don't, then get the hell out of his life.

Sex must not be the only thing you offer a man without seeking advice.

You're very stupid for this height of rudeness. Fool!

A man you have been with for three years and there was never a time you doubted him why doubt him now because money is involved For me I will borrow him the money so he can get back on his feet, as long as you know his not the lazy type. Nobody knows tomorrow and he never knew or wanted all these to befall him.Sometimes we should not treat our relationship based on what you heard happened in other people's own because the situations might be different and you will never know.

Suzzyyy, lend him double of what he lent you, which is 200k. Don't go beyond that and don't expect anything in return. Pls, take my advice.

You can give him half or less. Don't give him all.Humans can't be trusted.speaking from experience.Dont even try giving him all

daviesblaze:


500K !!!!!

WOW Never expected this coming from a lady.

All i've been seeing is not lending him the money at all or at most 200k should be sufficient. what a terrible mentality.
Indeed, this shows that love is dead.

Anyway @sweetyzinta, you did well in your advice. the suggestion sound reasonable. i hope @OP will consider it.

LOL. If I were the one, this is exactly what I will do without seeking for advice because the advice might confuse me the more. One good turn deserves another. Besides, it does not mean how many times you fall but your ability to rise matters. The downfall of a man isn't the end of his life.

LaDolceVida:
Don't do it I repeat don't do it

I HATE YOU!!!!

nathpope:


@yazz09 said it all.


however, is ur boyfriend (NOT HUSBAND) hardworking?
is he a heavy spender or a prudent fellow?

If u were in bis shoes and he in yours, how do you think he woild av responded to the matter at hand?

Evrybody needs a helping hand to lift one up out of d dungeon....however, be wise.
This is your life savings you are taliing about.
Dont put all your eggs into a basket.

Remember, he is your boyfriend...NOT ur husband.

i hope this help.

for me sef, even if they were married I wouldn't advise them to use all her savings to fix the business. He has plans. Plans fail. What if the money is lost? He obviously doesn't have any savings left that's why he's asking her to borrow him. Now if they are married and she gives him all her money and the plan fails they would need a little money to hold body and soul together. My point is in no situation should all the life savings of both partners be spent at once.

Borrow him what you can that it won't affect you, cis the chances are very slim

Colourich:
700k is too much to lend a man. Give him back the 100k, tell him that's what you have.

I hope you will smile when such is done to you too

It beats my imagination how selfish most of our
Women can be when it comes to money.
I guess ur bf didn’t post the 100k he gave u on social
media.
What happened to selfless love(?)
Why can’t u be positive that he MUST succeed with
the money u r about to give him.
Women of BUT(s) should be avoided..
I love u BUT...
I want to lend the money to him BUT....
Give him the damn money and tell him to give u
back when he’s up again...make plans with him jor
or stop using the word LOVE

Suzzyyy:
Hello Nairalanders! Plz help! I hv been scared and confused abt a risk I want to tk so I decided to share for advice.

Im 29 and I hv a boyfriend who is 33. We hv been happily dating for close to 3 years now, he once helped me financially in a good way with 100k when I had problem with my little business, then he was doing pretty fine with his business, I sell plastics and hez into cloth business. But somtin happened last 2 months, he had terrible problems with his business and lost almost everything including his shop and in a bid to salvage his situation he ended up owing many pple, when all these started he didn't tell me, thou hez a kind of person that likes handling his problem alone without disturbing or telling me which I don't like bcus it somehow makes me feel less important and useful to him, I got to know when he changed, his attitude, moods and everything changed, hez always disturbed, thinking and always visiting pple, he payed less concern and attention to me, don't even call and when I call, he will be in a haste to end it, I became confused, so I had to asked what was going on, he said nothing, I got upset and insisted he must tell me, he then opened up, I felt so bad and almost cried, since then I have been trying to maintain his upkeep and sometimes give him money which hez not comfortable with.

The problem now Is that im scared, he asked for a huge amount of money from me which is 700k, he wants to start all over again in his cloth business and also clear some debt, and I can only boast of 820k home and abroad as a business woman, i just feel he saw my account balance before asking for this, Im scared to loose the money and him too. I love this guy but im so scared of doing this, he helped me when I needed money, but this sacrifice is bigger than me, he showed and detailed everything he will be doing with the money, Im just confused to gamble with my life savings, I know I might sound ungrateful what if the business or our relationship crumble? Won't I be stranded and doomed? My business is not that strong and we all know how most of sacrifices like this ended for people. Is this kind of risk worth doing for a boyfriend

Plz advice me on what to do, plz.

You might say this is coming from an Ogogoro gulping dude but these are what's going to happen if you give him that money:

1. The business will not bounce back

2. He won't be able to pay back the money even if he has it.

3. That guy won't marry you! (Sorry to say this)

*The reason his business is dying is not money! That's why he is already owing many people and you will be added to the list. A good business will grow no matter how small it is started. Infact, regardless of all the money I have, I always start a new business the "smallest" way possible and watch its growth before deciding to pump in money.

JONNYSPUTE:
Its a pity how most of us reason especially when it comes to making sacrifices. I used to say it,there's nothing like love.. How can one claim to love another and cannot make a simple sacrifice? You rushed to nairaland to seek for advice whether you should help him ? I guess he wouldn't ve helped you out when you were in need if he did the exact thing you re doing now. Why didn't you call him and explain why you can't give him such amount rather than coming here to seek validation? Can't you just be honest with him and tell him what you can afford? We always shout I luv him or her when all is moving smoothly but as soon as temptation looms,we disappear or starts making up excuses. Its ur money do with it anyhow you want.

As in... The comments am reading here are so terrifying!!!! The word "Love" has been abused.

yazz09:
You are not obliged to lend him the exact amount he asked. Give him what you are comfortable with and tell him that's what you can part with as you still have other personal and business things that needs your funds

Op just listen to this guy....

For you to have come here to report this that means you both are real fond of yourselves

And for him to ask for such a large amount it means you both have been dealing financially

*conclusion*

If he’s worth 1million lend him 500k with stench agreement to refund

Do so for consecutive amounts!!!!!

kunleweb:



Can i kiss you for educating them on this

Like they'll take note