Hi.
I am a lady of 22 years, will be 23 by January next year. I just
graduated and I've been with my guy since 200 level. We are in a
no-sex long distance relationship. In fact, we are both virgins. We
are kind of S.U.ish, if you understand the picture I'm trying to
paint.

He graduated ahead of me, and now has a job and is comfortable enough
to get married. So he's been asking for us to get married before
February next year. This guy is caring, wise, matured, faithful and
crazily in love with me (at least that is what he keeps saying).

Now, the problem?

I am not in love with him. I definitely do like and respect him, but
no matter how much I try, I can't just seem to fall in love with him.
So, you might ask why I kept the relationship for so long?
Well, I broke it off once, but he still came back and said we can put
in the effort to make it work.

He is a kind of person that doesn't condone sex out of marriage. Now,
he says the sexual pressure is quite high on him. And since he is
financially okay, he wants us to get married before he travels out for
his masters abroad.

I really have to give him an answer now as that will determine his
plans when leaving the country by February.

Would you guys advice me to accept the proposal of someone I know will
be a great husband and hope love will come along down the line later? Can a marriage start with just respect and like?
Or should I let him go and hope I will meet someone later? (I keep hearing a lot of scary stories about guys on nairaland and I'm
actually scared that if I let go, I won't get a keeper like him later.)

P.S.
I am a highly introverted person, and to make things worse, I work
remotely which means I hardly see people. I am always in my room with
my laptop.

C.C. Bukatyne, LadySarah, Shookonekilla, Ishilove, Sisisioge, Acidosis, TooNoisy, Eketem, Eyinjuege, Dominique, Eketem, KanwuliaExtra, Wilfredpat22, Tintingz, Babythug, Treasuredlove, Clarathomp, Cococandy, Nutase, Antina, Delishpot, St.surreal. (I've seen you guys give some opinion that I respect, need your say on this also. Thank you!).

THANKS TO EVERYONE THAT CONTRIBUTED. I DIDNT EXPECT TO GET SO MUCH GREAT ADVICE. THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN.

sleit:
Hi.
I am a lady of 22 years, will be 23 by January next year. I just
graduated and I've been with my guy since 200 level. We are in a
no-sex long distance relationship. In fact, we are both virgins. We
are kind of S.U.ish, if you understand the picture I'm trying to
paint.

He graduated ahead of me, and now has a job and is comfortable enough
to get married. So he's been asking for us to get married before
February next year. This guy is caring, wise, matured, faithful and
crazily in love with me (at least that is what he keeps saying).

Now, the problem?

I am not in love with him. I definitely do like and respect him, but
no matter how much I try, I can't just seem to fall in love with him.
So, you might ask why I kept the relationship for so long?
Well, I broke it off once, but he still came back and said we can put
in the effort to make it work.

He is a kind of person that doesn't condone sex out of marriage. Now,
he says the sexual pressure is quite high on him. And since he is
financially okay, he wants us to get married before he travels out for
his masters abroad.

I really have to give him an answer now as that will determine his
plans when leaving the country by February.

Would you guys advice me to accept the proposal of someone I know will
be a great husband and hope love will come along down the line later? Can a marriage start with just respect and like?
Or should I let him go and hope I will meet someone later? (I keep hearing a lot of scary stories about guys on nairaland and I'm
actually scared that if I let go, I won't get a keeper like him later.)

P.S.
I am a highly introverted person, and to make things worse, I work
remotely which means I hardly see people. I am always in my room with
my laptop.

C.C. Bukatyne, LadySarah, Shookonekilla, Ishilove, Sisisioge, Acidosis, TooNoisy, Eketem, Eyinjuege, Dominique, Eketem, KanwuliaExtra, Wilfredpat22, Tintingz, Babythug, Treasuredlove, Clarathomp, Cococandy, Nutase, Antina, Delishpot, St.surreal. (I've seen you guys give some opinion that I respect, need your say on this also. Thank you!).

Love can come out of respect. If he treats you right and has no character that may cause you sorrow in the future (Many turbulent marriages show signs before the parties tie the knot but those signs are ussualy ignored because of love) then yes go ahead and marry. If you feel like you will NEVER warm up to him let him know so that he may start looking for someone who would treat him right.

It’s a gamble either way, if you’re both content with a marriage of stability over ‘love’, understand that it may not be the most passionate, romantic relationship but there’s a level of respect and a fair amount of compatibility, go for it. If not and you don’t think you can ever love him even after marriage (it’s possible, but not a guarantee so it’s a risk), don’t.

sleit:
Hi.
I am a lady of 22 years, will be 23 by January next year. I just
graduated and I've been with my guy since 200 level. We are in a
no-sex long distance relationship. In fact, we are both virgins. We
are kind of S.U.ish, if you understand the picture I'm trying to
paint.

He graduated ahead of me, and now has a job and is comfortable enough
to get married. So he's been asking for us to get married before
February next year. This guy is caring, wise, matured, faithful and
crazily in love with me (at least that is what he keeps saying).

Now, the problem?

I am not in love with him. I definitely do like and respect him, but
no matter how much I try, I can't just seem to fall in love with him.
So, you might ask why I kept the relationship for so long?
Well, I broke it off once, but he still came back and said we can put
in the effort to make it work.

He is a kind of person that doesn't condone sex out of marriage. Now,
he says the sexual pressure is quite high on him. And since he is
financially okay, he wants us to get married before he travels out for
his masters abroad.

I really have to give him an answer now as that will determine his
plans when leaving the country by February.

Would you guys advice me to accept the proposal of someone I know will
be a great husband and hope love will come along down the line later? Can a marriage start with just respect and like?
Or should I let him go and hope I will meet someone later? (I keep hearing a lot of scary stories about guys on nairaland and I'm
actually scared that if I let go, I won't get a keeper like him later.)

P.S.
I am a highly introverted person, and to make things worse, I work
remotely which means I hardly see people. I am always in my room with
my laptop.

C.C. Bukatyne, LadySarah, Shookonekilla, Ishilove, Sisisioge, Acidosis, TooNoisy, Eketem, Eyinjuege, Dominique, Eketem, KanwuliaExtra, Wilfredpat22, Tintingz, Babythug, Treasuredlove, Clarathomp, Cococandy, Nutase, Antina, Delishpot, St.surreal. (I've seen you guys give some opinion that I respect, need your say on this also. Thank you!).

If you don't love him(is it that you don't find him attractive or what), my advice, don't go into marriage with him.

Because thinking you might later develope love for him is not certain, I think you guys need to spend more time together, like you said, your relationship is the distance type.

tintingz:
If you don't love him(is it that you don't find him attractive or what), my advice, don't go into marriage with him.

Because thinking you might later develope love for him is not certain, I think you guys need to spend more time together, like you said, your relationship is the distance type.

So true

My dear, marry him. As long as he is presentable and he loves you. He will treat u like egg and with time u will get to develop deep feelings that will keep the marriage together.
Cause if u ask me? What's love? You may think love is that butterflies kind of feelings, u feel at the pit of your tummy when u sight a guy. My sister that's not love but lust mixed with infatuation. And most times, such feelings don't end well.
Getting the perfect husband, does not exist nowadays. But getting a presentable and responsible man who loves and care for u, is the key to a lasting marriage, as long as you open your heart, accept him wholeheartedly and with time u will be happy u went ahead with the marriage. Also communication, goes a long way. Always communicate before and in marriage.
Guys these days are not ready to settle down, they will just use and dump, all in the name of I love you. Pls, don't miss this opportunity.

What in marriage is most important to you? Let me tell you, love in marriage comes and goes so don’t have this thought that marriage is a fairytale of love. I think you need some time to think about this. It seems the reason why he wants to marry is so that he can have sex, while I feel you think there is someone better out there for you. He can give you time to think about what you really want. Say 6 months. When he is on holiday he can come back and do the wedding if you want to go ahead with it. There is no rush and don’t let anyone pressure you or use pity to push you into a lifetime commitment.

There must have been a reason why you have been with him all this while, but something about him is making you have reservations and you have not expressly said it yet. Something is making you not love him. What is it? If after you have had the time to think, you still do not love him, please break up with him so that he can find someone that loves him. He also does not deserve to marry a woman who has no love or feelings for him.

baby124:
What in marriage is most important to you? Let me tell you, love in marriage comes and goes so don’t have this thought that marriage is a fairytale of love. I think you need some time to think about this. It seems the reason why he wants to marry is so that he can have sex, while I feel you think there is someone better out there for you. He can give you time to think about what you really want. Say 6 months. When he is on holiday he can come back and do the wedding if you want to go ahead with it. There is no rush and don’t let anyone pressure you or use pity to push you into a lifetime commitment.

There must have been a reason why you have been with him all this while, but something about him is making you have reservations and you have not expressly said it yet. Something is making you not love him. What is it? If after you have had the time to think, you still do not love him, please break up with him so that he can find someone that loves him. He also does not deserve to marry a woman who has no love or feelings for him.

True

sleit:

I've been with my guy since 200 level. We are in a
no-sex long distance relationship. In fact, we are both virgins.

He graduated ahead of me, and now has a job and is comfortable enough
to get married. So he's been asking for us to get married before
February next year. This guy is caring, wise, matured, faithful and
crazily in love with me (at least that is what he keeps saying).


Now, the problem?

I am not in love with him. I definitely do like and respect him, but
no matter how much I try, I can't just seem to fall in love with him.

TO DO LIST:
1. FIND A NICE, LOVING, ABLE, RESPONSIBLE AND DECENT MAN.

2. DISCOVER HE TRULY LOVES YOU.
3. DON'T LOVE HIM BACK.

4. FIND A WAYWARD, IRRESPONSIBLE, GOOD FOR NOTHING DOUCHEBAG. 100% PLAYBOY.
5. FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM UNCONTROLLABLY.
6. GETS USED TO THE MAXIMUM AND DUMPED IN THE DUSTBIN.

7. ADOPTS THE ANTHEM "MEN ARE TRASH" AND "ALL MEN ARE DOGS", "SCUM".

8. REPEAT THE ENTIRE CYCLE AGAIN FROM 1 - 7

-MOST GIRLS.

CAPSLOCKED:



TO DO LIST:
1. FIND A NICE, LOVING, ABLE, RESPONSIBLE AND DECENT MAN.
2. DISCOVER HE TRULY LOVES YOU.
3 DON'T LOVE HIM BACK.

4. FIND WAYWARD, IRRESPONSIBLE, GOOD FOR NOTHING DOUCHEBAG. 100% PLAYBOY.
5. FALL IN LOVE WITH HIM.
6. GETS USED WITHOUT CONTROL AND DUMPED IN THE DUSTBIN.

7. ADOPTS THE ANTHEM "MEN ARE TRASH" AND "ALL MEN ARE DOGS", "SCUM".

-MOST GIRLS.

Honestly, that was the mistake I made when I was younger and I regret till today. But at least I now know better.
The search for that butterfly feeling was my ruin and thats the truth. I fell for the wrong guys, in fact 120% dough bags
If only I can turn the hands of time but what has happened, has happened.
Am much wiser nw.
Op, be wise o.

Don't make the mistakes, ladies like me, made in the past.

sleit:
Hi.
I am a lady of 22 years, will be 23 by January next year. I just
graduated and I've been with my guy since 200 level. We are in a
no-sex long distance relationship. In fact, we are both virgins. We
are kind of S.U.ish, if you understand the picture I'm trying to
paint.

He graduated ahead of me, and now has a job and is comfortable enough
to get married. So he's been asking for us to get married before
February next year. This guy is caring, wise, matured, faithful and
crazily in love with me (at least that is what he keeps saying).

Now, the problem?

I am not in love with him. I definitely do like and respect him, but
no matter how much I try, I can't just seem to fall in love with him.
So, you might ask why I kept the relationship for so long?
Well, I broke it off once, but he still came back and said we can put
in the effort to make it work.

He is a kind of person that doesn't condone sex out of marriage. Now,
he says the sexual pressure is quite high on him. And since he is
financially okay, he wants us to get married before he travels out for
his masters abroad.

I really have to give him an answer now as that will determine his
plans when leaving the country by February.

Would you guys advice me to accept the proposal of someone I know will
be a great husband and hope love will come along down the line later? Can a marriage start with just respect and like?
Or should I let him go and hope I will meet someone later? (I keep hearing a lot of scary stories about guys on nairaland and I'm
actually scared that if I let go, I won't get a keeper like him later.)

P.S.
I am a highly introverted person, and to make things worse, I work
remotely which means I hardly see people. I am always in my room with
my laptop.

C.C. Bukatyne, LadySarah, Shookonekilla, Ishilove, Sisisioge, Acidosis, TooNoisy, Eketem, Eyinjuege, Dominique, Eketem, KanwuliaExtra, Wilfredpat22, Tintingz, Babythug, Treasuredlove, Clarathomp, Cococandy, Nutase, Antina, Delishpot, St.surreal. (I've seen you guys give some opinion that I respect, need your say on this also. Thank you!).

There is more to marriage than what some single picture while dating,... You've been with him for long, yet the love didn't fall in, excuse might be its a distance relationship, does it mean you both don't take time to visit each other?

Now you thinking if you both get married, the love will fall in..,,, the truth is love is important in marriage, cos when one gets married, there are some character that will spring up from your spouse.. The love is what will keep one.. Imagine those character shows up n you are waiting for love to come... . I would advise you take your time to be sure you're attracted to him n you love him, pray along side and never be pressurised into married or marry out of sympathy for partner....!!

I think distance is the reason y u still haven't fall for him all this while,get really close with him,I don't mean sex ooo,but try nd spend much tym with him nd if u still don't fall for him den don't marry him.my two centl

He is in love with you without SEX beclouding his judgements . Must be one hell of a guy.

What is wrong with you?Since 200 level?
What do you really want to say'you are in love'?You want to feel that butterfly in your tummy?

He's the SU type and that may be the reason why you don't 'feel' him but it's the type of relationship you wanted too.Or was the no-sex relationship just his own idea?

You probably need to re-evaluate what your visions for a life-partner is.Don't be one of those 'too much Mills and Boon got you chasing dreams'.

It is VERY important to love who you marry.I've had some women tell me their skin crawls when their husbands 'get on them'.Don't put yourself in that position.
Take the next few weeks to think deeply about it and if you still don't think it will work,let him know.

victorian:










Honestly, that was the mistake I made when I was younger and I regret till today. But at least I now know better.
The search for that butterfly feeling was my ruin and thats the truth. I fell for the wrong guys, in fact 120% dough bags
If only I can turn the hands of time but what has happened, has happened.
Am much wiser nw.
Op, be wise o.

Don't make the mistakes, ladies like me, made in the past.

She has to experience what you experienced herself otherwise she will never appreciate him and the guy will see hell in that marriage. Some girls need experience in dating to know clearly what they want. This is why I am against an under 25 marrying except she is someone that is kind and able to love and accommodate anyone.

Even the under 25 kind of love or interpretation of love can be very fleeting. Girls need to date before settling, trust me. Dating does not mean they have to have sex. Now I am sure you know the kind of husband you want. You gained a lot from that experience or you and that guy may have been divorced by now. If I married the guy who wanted to marry me at 22 I would have shown him shege and divorced him. So I quietly walked away and I don’t regret it.

Love is important in marriage but not as important as a man who respects and cares for you.


Maybe you need time to discover what you want hopefully he will still be around when you decide you want him.

I don't like anyone pressured into marriage sha.

Op, you that is SU-ish, what is love? Which love are u talking abt because I know marriage is likened to christ and the church which indicates its agape love that a man and wife should share.. That is note 1.
Secondly, you will be mistaken to think that the love u seek for confirmation is not the kind that carries a marriage tru. If u are waiting to fall in Ur romantic worldly love, u will fall out also, one day
Thirdly, given that u are a virgin and he will be Ur first(supposing u agree), Ur body will fall u in the love u are looking for, no Brainer.
Love is a decision dear.
U love who u marry and not necessarily the other way around

HOWEVER, don't be greedy, if he repulses u or u feel u want a "bad boy", pls allow the son of an innocent woman to go find a wife else where.u can't keep him when u know u may not agree to him.
I love ppl like him, ppl who move by their own God given pace, who know what they want and go for it. Pls don't slow him down. Bless u.

Eketem:
Love is important in marriage but not as important as a man who respects and cares for you.


Maybe you need time to discover what you want hopefully he will still be around when you decide you want him.

I don't like anyone pressured into marriage sha.

pressure how? Is he blackmailing her into it or threatening her into it? It's a yes or no something.

baby124:

She has to experience what you experienced herself otherwise she will never appreciate him and the guy will see hell in that marriage. Some girls need experience in dating to know clearly what they want. This is why I am against an under 25 marrying except she is someone that is kind and able to love and accommodate anyone.

Even the under 25 kind of love or interpretation of love can be very fleeting. Girls need to date before settling, trust me. Dating does not mean they have to have sex. Now I am sure you know the kind of husband you want. You gained a lot from that experience or you and that guy may have been divorced by now. If I married the guy who wanted to marry me at 22 I would have shown him shege and divorced him. So I quietly walked away and I don’t regret it.

Ha! I gained more than alot from my past experiences. Whenever I see guys who are playboys, fowora oja kind of guys coming and smiling those deceptive smiles, trying to woo me, I simply cut them short! I don't waste time on rubbish anymore. I know exactly what I want in a husband.

If the Op is wise, she will learn to love this man coming for marriage and appreciate him. She can fall in love with him, if only she allows herself to. And listen to what some of us are saying. Instead of experiencing series of heartbreaks till age 30 or even above 30 ,and still single.
Some single men out there are not worth the stress, that's the truth. They are time wasters .

Op, use your tongue count your teeth. Opportunity in marriage from a good man comes once after many many years. Think!

victorian:








Ha! I gained more than alot from my past experiences. Whenever I see guys who are playboys, fowora oja kind of guys coming and smiling those deceptive smiles, trying to woo me, I simply cut them short! I don't waste time on rubbish anymore. I know exactly what I want in a husband.

If the Op is wise, she will learn to love this man coming for marriage and appreciate him. She can fall in love with him, if only she allows herself to. And listen to what some of us are saying. Instead of experiencing series of heartbreaks till age 30 or even above 30 ,and still single.
Some single men out there are not worth the stress, that's the truth. They are time wasters .

Op, use your tongue count your teeth. Opportunity in marriage from a good man comes once after many many years. Think!

The truth is she cannot truly learn from your experience in matters of the heart. She has to learn based on her own experience otherwise she will have reason to always doubt if she made the right choice when they fight or he falls short of what she thinks love should be. She may also be lucky to find who and what she is looking for.

Love is a choice. The love that comes from a conscious choice to love someone is the love that keeps a marriage after the initial thrill is gone. That's the love that keeps a marriage when the kids start coming in. That's the love that keeps a marriage when the children do not come. That's the love that keeps a marriage when there are financial constraints. That's the love that keeps a marriage when your partners vexes the hell out of you.

However, is the sexual pressure your guy is facing the reason he wants to get married to you? Because if he can't handle sexual pressures here in Nigeria and he wants to go for a masters in a country where nudity is a social given. How is he going to handle that with his sex partner (his wife) thousands of kilometres away?

Guy stop being boring. Women despise boring guys and easily get dripping wet for non-bring guys.

The problem this girl is facing is simple. She has a "good" guy who does things by the book but lacks spontaneity. He sounds rigid. He probably has never slapped her butt, ever. Never pressed the bobby, once ever. She can not feel sexual desires towards him. It is against natural human laws of sexual attraction.

Women want a muthafucka, not a sheep.

I would not be surprised if this sister is already chopping blokos codedly. If she isn't, she probably already is already eyeing some dude somewhere.

All this no sex before marriage sef dey sound somehow for my ear. How can a woman love you when you haven't banged nonsense out of her head. Give her the kind of love making that will make her deny her parents, religion and tribe.

Stop thinking women will love you because you have money, because they won't. You will only be an ATM.

sleit:
Hi.
I am a lady of 22 years, will be 23 by January next year. I just
graduated and I've been with my guy since 200 level. We are in a
no-sex long distance relationship. In fact, we are both virgins. We
are kind of S.U.ish, if you understand the picture I'm trying to
paint.

He graduated ahead of me, and now has a job and is comfortable enough
to get married. So he's been asking for us to get married before
February next year. This guy is caring, wise, matured, faithful and
crazily in love with me (at least that is what he keeps saying).

Now, the problem?

I am not in love with him. I definitely do like and respect him, but
no matter how much I try, I can't just seem to fall in love with him.
So, you might ask why I kept the relationship for so long?
Well, I broke it off once, but he still came back and said we can put
in the effort to make it work.

He is a kind of person that doesn't condone sex out of marriage. Now,
he says the sexual pressure is quite high on him. And since he is
financially okay, he wants us to get married before he travels out for
his masters abroad.

I really have to give him an answer now as that will determine his
plans when leaving the country by February.

Would you guys advice me to accept the proposal of someone I know will
be a great husband and hope love will come along down the line later? Can a marriage start with just respect and like?
Or should I let him go and hope I will meet someone later? (I keep hearing a lot of scary stories about guys on nairaland and I'm
actually scared that if I let go, I won't get a keeper like him later.)

P.S.
I am a highly introverted person, and to make things worse, I work
remotely which means I hardly see people. I am always in my room with
my laptop.

C.C. Bukatyne, LadySarah, Shookonekilla, Ishilove, Sisisioge, Acidosis, TooNoisy, Eketem, Eyinjuege, Dominique, Eketem, KanwuliaExtra, Wilfredpat22, Tintingz, Babythug, Treasuredlove, Clarathomp, Cococandy, Nutase, Antina, Delishpot, St.surreal. (I've seen you guys give some opinion that I respect, need your say on this also. Thank you!).

I am sorry dear, just seeing this. I actually married my high school sweetheart and I must tell you, love is very important in marriage. It covers all lapses. Finance, spiritual, physical etc. Without love, you will not be able to tolerate each other and this will be really bad. I mean marriage is sleeping next to someone who might continually fart all through the night or loves to kiss you without brushing etc(just giving some simple examples) its not an easy ride. A neighbor once told me she married her husband because he loved her more than she loved him and she was tired of heartbreak. Turned out the guy didn't love her as much as he claimed to and she didn't love him atall. That marriage didn't last two years. Thankfully, you say you are a christian, then I will key into our mutual faith and tell you to seek His face because with His guidance, you can never go wrong.

Belafonte:
Guy stop being boring. Women despise boring guys and easily get dripping wet for non-bring guys.

The problem this girl is facing is simple. She has a "good" guy who does things by the book but lacks spontaneity. He sounds rigid. He probably has never slapped her butt, ever. Never pressed the bobby, once ever. She can not feel sexual desires towards him. It is against natural human laws of sexual attraction.

Women want a muthafucka, not a sheep.

I would not be surprised if this sister is already chopping blokos codedly. If she isn't, she probably already is already eyeing some dude somewhere.

All this no sex before marriage sef dey sound somehow for my ear. How can a woman love you when you haven't banged nonsense out of her head. Give her the kind of love making that will make her deny her parents, religion and tribe.

Stop thinking women will love you because you have money, because they won't. You will only be an ATM.

hahaha,guy u dy mad ooo,haha.

How I wish she go hear you
That's why I dey vex for some ladies. You go dey follow one maga guy like Dopemu while another dey die for you for one corner begging to marry you.

victorian:
My dear, marry him. As long as he is presentable and he loves you. He will treat u like egg and with time u will get to develop deep feelings that will keep the marriage together.
Cause if u ask me? What's love? You may think love is that butterflies kind of feelings, u feel at the pit of your tummy when u sight a guy. My sister that's not love but lust mixed with infatuation. And most times, such feelings don't end well.
Getting the perfect husband, does not exist nowadays. But getting a presentable and responsible man who loves and care for u, is the key to a lasting marriage, as long as you open your heart, accept him wholeheartedly and with time u will be happy u went ahead with the marriage. Also communication, goes a long way. Always communicate before and in marriage.
Guys these days are not ready to settle down, they will just use and dump, all in the name of I love you. Pls, don't miss this opportunity.

Belafonte:
Guy stop being boring. Women despise boring guys and easily get dripping wet for non-bring guys.

The problem this girl is facing is simple. She has a "good" guy who does things by the book but lacks spontaneity. He sounds rigid. He probably has never slapped her butt, ever. Never pressed the bobby, once ever. She can not feel sexual desires towards him. It is against natural human laws of sexual attraction.

Women want a muthafucka, not a sheep.

I would not be surprised if this sister is already chopping blokos codedly. If she isn't, she probably already is already eyeing some dude somewhere.

All this no sex before marriage sef dey sound somehow for my ear. How can a woman love you when you haven't banged nonsense out of her head. Give her the kind of love making that will make her deny her parents, religion and tribe.

Stop thinking women will love you because you have money, because they won't. You will only be an ATM.

You took the words outta my mouth. The simple thing is, the Op is looking for excitement, adventure, "Fun" etc. the kind which this brother-in-Lord cannot provide.

Thing is, by the time she's had enough and wants to settle down, the guy (and every other good enough guy) must have been long gone. Story of most ladies

you don't love him...then don't marry him..let him looks for someone who loves him and care about him...tell him.the truth..if you decieve him and get married to him...it won't end well!!!..leave him alone..he deserves someone who loves him.....

OP this your relationship is simply INCONCLUSIVE !!!

Eketem:
Love is important in marriage but not as important as a man who respects and cares for you.


Maybe you need time to discover what you want hopefully he will still be around when you decide you want him.

I don't like anyone pressured into marriage sha.

I agree with you. The only thing is you can never know a man/woman completely until you get married, that is when the true test of love comes in and i think we should always remember that love can never be one sided in marriage. It can never work, else adultery comes in

Pusyiter:

How I wish she go hear you
That's why I dey vex for some ladies. You go dey follow one maga guy like Dopemu while another dey die for you for one corner begging to marry you.

I just hope she listens. It's for her own good.

My dear u can't blame us, it was youthful exuberance and we feeling fly, we are so young and pretty.
if only I had someone to advise me back then. I won't have bad memories of my exs hovering at the back of my head. My kids would have been 11years, 9years, then the third one should be 7years by now with a stable dad and grounded dad and husband next to me and our kids.
But I was thinking of mills and boons, looking for a tall dashing overly handsome either fair or dark guy with broad shoulders
Those criterias were my doom!
I didn't know on-time
I felt I was falling in love and going through a passionate process.. And yea, I was going through a process but bad and terrible ones for that matter..

My dear, na God save me O.. If not I would have been history by now. I just thank God for everything, at least am wiser and stronger now.


How u dey jare?

Eketem:
Love is important in marriage but not as important as a man who respects and cares for you.


Maybe you need time to discover what you want hopefully he will still be around when you decide you want him.

I don't like anyone pressured into marriage sha.

I agree with you. The only thing is you can never know a man/woman completely until you get married, that is when the true test of love comes in and i think we should always remember that love can never be one sided in marriage. It can never work, else adultery comes in
In marrying my high school swthrt lol, we actually got tired of each other. We took a really long break from each other...explored a little and came back again and thought jointly....nah! Na only u biko...lol. Mutual love matters...a lot

Sleit what you are looking for is Romance and not love.

Love is what you feel for the other after you've been married for 30-50 years and then one day, a look, or a smile or a shared laugh tohether and you suddenly realize that you love that man you call your husband and can't imagine your life without him.

If you find a good man who loves and cherishes you who you totally respect then please marry him.

Men want respect, women love to be cherished and pampered.

Besides, the two of you need to spend more time together before you get married so that you can be sure you both aren't hiding important aspects of your lives from each other that could be a deal breaker.

Otherwise, I'd say MARRY HIM.