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Number 225 Katakata Street - Literature (123) - Nairaland

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Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 12:32pm On Nov 27, 2018
Pheezie:

I'm sorry bro.
I've made ammendment.

Not nearly enough.

This is what I found on your page:

I believe we all enjoyed ACCIDENTAL VICTIM.
I'll be starting a new story titled NUMBER 225 KATAKATA STREET today.
I don't know how long this story will take but i can assure you it will be worthy of your time.
You're gonna laugh and laugh then laugh with laugh.
I will be posting the episode after i've seen enough LIKE & COMMENT on each post.
Invite/tag your friends to come and enjoy one of the best comedy novel ever.
Any questions


You cannot still have that. And you were asking for and enjoying the comments. You only put an inconspicuous "By Centino" not even beside the title in the last chapter you posted. SMH.

What you should do is rewrite that Intro. On every comment, you reply that the story is not yours. And on every Chapter you put By Centino right BESIDE the title. Cover yourself in further glory by providing a link to the original here on NL.

Wanted to do a midweek update but you just spoiled my mood man. You should have just kept quiet. I had since handed you over to God and apholaryn.

7 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Psychodavidovic(m): 12:55pm On Nov 27, 2018
See as this guy just spoil mid-week update for person. angry

Pheezie better close down that Facebook group abi na page.
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by genius43(m): 1:30pm On Nov 27, 2018
Where is that guy that spoilt our mid-week update?

Oga Centino please/abeg/Ejo/Don Allah/Biko, reconsider us.
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 1:58pm On Nov 27, 2018
Centino.
What I did is totally unacceptable and i'm sorry for that.
Check my page again now.
I'm putting the story on locked up right from this instant until you approve or stop it if you din't.
I shoulda asked your permission before now.
It would spoil my mood if i was the writer too buh you shouldn't delay the joy of your fans who wait every sunday for your update because of my mess.
I'm sorry indeed.

9 Likes

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 2:00pm On Nov 27, 2018
genius43:
Where is that guy that spoit our mid-week update?

Oga Centino please/abeg/Ejo/Don Allah/Biko, reconsider us.
Guy e no reach this na
If you stone me that hard looking stone bros i go die ooh.
.
Jokes apart, I'm sorry to you and everyone on this thread.

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 2:01pm On Nov 27, 2018
I apologise to everyone here. I'm sorry.

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 2:09pm On Nov 27, 2018
Pheezie:
Centino.
What I did is totally unacceptable and i'm sorry for that.
Check my page again now.
I'm putting the story on locked up right from this instant until you approve or stop it if you din't.
I shoulda asked your permission before now.
It would spoil my mood if i was the writer too buh you shouldn't delay the joy of your fans who wait every sunday for your update because of my mess.
I'm sorry indeed.

That's fine man. One more thing...one big stout and one pot if isi ewu this Friday grin

I'm committed to a midweek update this week so I'll get on with it. Tune in tomorrow everyone.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Nobody: 2:10pm On Nov 27, 2018
Guys should please calm down.
The guy acknowledged his wrong and even apologized.
The owner of the story did not even carry the matter on his head.

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 2:19pm On Nov 27, 2018
Centino:


That's fine man. One more thing...one big stout and one pot if isi ewu this Friday grin

I'm committed to a midweek update this week so I'll get on with it. Tune in tomorrow everyone.
Isi Ewu?
Lwkmd
I feel like giving you a knock and call you "Ewu Gambia".
Don't worry tho,I go use trailer carry champagne and hennessy enter this thread tomorrow and I'll make sure that afolayan drinks till he off his trouser infront of us all.
.
You've got a big warm heart Centino.
I appreciate you.
I became your number 1 fan today.

3 Likes

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 2:23pm On Nov 27, 2018
You see
You guys all need me oo
If i can be pissing Centino off everyday and he start giving us update every friday and sunday,don't you think it's cool
Just kidding...
Thanks to those who forgive me already nd sorry to those who still havent.
Abeg abeg abeg help me beg that guy wey wan stone me before oooh
I'm too young to die now oo.

3 Likes

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by genius43(m): 2:30pm On Nov 27, 2018
Pheezie:

Guy e no reach this na
If you stone me that hard looking stone bros i go die ooh.
.
Jokes apart, I'm sorry to you and everyone on this thread.

Apology accepted.

But it's good we value people's intellectual property, that way they grow.

2 Likes

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by dimssy(m): 2:33pm On Nov 27, 2018
You think you can just give him a big stout alone..it's not done anywhere.
People normally buy like 4 crate of big stout for boys..so oga centino, reorder your order.

Centino:


That's fine man. One more thing...one big stout and one pot if isi ewu this Friday grin

I'm committed to a midweek update this week so I'll get on with it. Tune in tomorrow everyone.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 2:37pm On Nov 27, 2018
genius43:


Apology accepted.

But it's good we value people's intellectual property, that way they grow.
Yeah.
I understand.
Thanks man.
Hope you don drop the stone??

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by niqablady(f): 3:48pm On Nov 27, 2018
Yaaaa there is gonna be mid-week update


Thanks in advance bro

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by genius43(m): 4:51pm On Nov 27, 2018
Pheezie:

Yeah.
I understand.
Thanks man.
Hope you don drop the stone??

We are good.

I no even get strength to throw stones under this heat

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by nwakaibe(m): 5:00pm On Nov 27, 2018
Geenosko:


In UR flames voice grin

Spotted. BLW Gang.. dont do dope

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Pheezie(m): 5:23pm On Nov 27, 2018
genius43:

We are good.
I no even get strength to throw stones under this heat
Thanks Man.

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by sheycrown(f): 8:46pm On Nov 27, 2018
[quote author=Centino post=73290706]doctor306, benpuzzy, Dmajor100, samkuks, Issedy, Kendrickmykell, jonily ...nice to have you join us. Poisonivy01 show your face. sheycrown...why? cheesy



Centino my centimo, I've been busy ni jare. But I always try not to miss our Sunday Sunday medicine grin

Thanks for checking up on me...and thanks for this hot update too grin

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by phoenixchap: 9:32pm On Nov 27, 2018
Centino:


My number 1 fan!

Nice to hear from you again o.

This update in a hurry ke. And you say it is small? You know the word count? grin

Stay tuned my man. Next week will be bumper. For you wink
them go arrange your kolanut when you come area no worry. Your head is there I done arrange tent and chair against sunday
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by 2ndetinnie: 12:40am On Nov 28, 2018
My first comment on nairaland ever.
Egbon Centino ur story is amazing.... keep it up man
Already anticipating ur mid-week update tho
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by TheStarsAlign: 7:50am On Nov 28, 2018
do4luv14:


nah your first rib creaker story be dis, chaiii bro go read MAN WEY DEY REASON , by flow
chaiii you go fit wet ya pant with laff sef

Kindly point the link
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Nobody: 8:36am On Nov 28, 2018
Mama Akunna when will you die lipsrsealed
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Fazemood(m): 9:47am On Nov 28, 2018
Pheezie:
Centino.
What I did is totally unacceptable and i'm sorry for that.
Check my page again now.
I'm putting the story on locked up right from this instant until you approve or stop it if you din't.
I shoulda asked your permission before now.
It would spoil my mood if i was the writer too buh you shouldn't delay the joy of your fans who wait every sunday for your update because of my mess.
I'm sorry indeed.
Oga Centino abeg look upon his crime with mercy, I believe he meant well when he came publicly to apologise. Be the nice guy you always are, Abeg gbahara mm'ehe. Forgive his tresspasses. If not for say economy hard I for buy you "GOLDBERG" I sure sey dat wan go cool your temperature.

Just chill, if em try am again, na daking we go use rearrange him mental parameter grin

Pheezie ko pheaces you dun hear? No try am again o
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 10:05am On Nov 28, 2018
[quote author=sheycrown post=73360459][/quote]

You're welcome wink
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 10:06am On Nov 28, 2018
phoenixchap:
them go arrange your kolanut when you come area no worry. Your head is there I done arrange tent and chair against sunday

Happening today man. I go soon post the missing paragraphs from Sunday as someone put it grin
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 10:08am On Nov 28, 2018
2ndetinnie:
My first comment on nairaland ever.
Egbon Centino ur story is amazing.... keep it up man
Already anticipating ur mid-week update tho

Really cool man! Great to have you on Katakata Street wink smiley
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by surddick(m): 10:34am On Nov 28, 2018
Mr centino ur work is just lovely
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by wallace007(m): 1:05pm On Nov 28, 2018
It's a long journey but I finally arrive safely , more ink in your biro cent
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 3:13pm On Nov 28, 2018
surddick:
Mr centino ur work is just lovely

Thanks surddick. Been a while.
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 3:14pm On Nov 28, 2018
wallace007:
It's a long journey but I finally arrive safely , more ink in your biro cent

Thanks man. Happy to have you with us now. So we celebrate with a midweek update. grin

1 Like

Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Silensa(m): 3:41pm On Nov 28, 2018
Centino, u nah baba. After u nah you, before u nah still u. Waiting patiently for the midweek jollof
Re: Number 225 Katakata Street by Centino: 3:52pm On Nov 28, 2018
Hi everyone. So today we have a midweek update. If you stumble on it, in the voice of Pheezie "invite/tag your friends to come and enjoy... grin




ASAMPEPE



“Now do to me as you do to all those village girls.” The words rang in his head and Chisco turned the nurse over, had her spread-eagled and held her ankles apart and balanced himself on his heels and resumed thrusting with fresh vigor. As he took in the beauty of the nurse under him, he began to mouth “asampepe! asampepe! Kpoo m aha m! uto di ka icecream! asampepe!”. Josephine also threw caution to the wind and began to make interminable sounds of her own. Only they forgot that they lived in a face me I face you and neighbors could easily hear them.

Irikefe, smarting from the manhandling he just received from his father saw the children giggling and scratching their heads in pure enjoyment and decided to investigate. They all straightened up and moved away from the door when they saw him coming, but having been on Chisco trail since the nurse returned to the compound, he could already guess what was happening. He shooed the children away and placed his ear on the door and sure enough, Chisco was masticating Nurse Jo. He wanted to peep but the lock was not one that supported that, and the children were watching him. “Asampepe! Chia! I gburu m o!” The monkey could not even keep his mouth shut! Irikefe also scratched his head and grabbed his crotch. Seeing he was helpless he strode away to the frontage where the men were still talking. His father has already joined them.



“Gentlemen, can you imagine the effrontery of Governor Ganduje? The man donated ten million naira to EFCC and ICPC to help them in fighting corruption. Has anyone ever heard of a thing more preposterous?”

“Did they accept the money?”

“Senator Ben Bruce demanded that they reject it. And I think they did.”

“Not only that, he had previously donated one hundred buses to the Buhari presidential campaign.”

“And they accepted it?”

“Before nko?”

“Where do they think he got the money from?”

“Is he not a governor? He can always defend such expenses. But that is not the issue here. We are talking about a man that was filmed taking a bribe, who should be too ashamed to get out of bed, let alone attending public functions and making donations. Even to EFCC! Wetin person no go see for this country?"

“Why will he not do that when Buhari openly called him a responsible man in France. I’m sure he forgot that even though it was in France that we will get to hear in Nigeria. Rather than out rightly condemn Ganduje, he instead attacked former Kano Governor Kwankwaso; accusing him of diverting state funds to contest for Presidency. The same Kwankwaso that delivered two million votes in the 2015 elections.”

“Did Buhari forget that?”

“He didn’t. He his blinded by his friendship with Ganduje who is now foes with Kwankwaso.”

“What a shame.”

“And here in Lagos the Oba of Lagos announced that there is no vacancy in Lagos Government house and in Abuja. He clearly said that Lagosians should not vote the PDP. What kind of royal father does that? isn’t he supposed to be non partisan? Is that not using his own hand to divide his kingdom?”

“It is the same Oba that threatened any Igbos that voted against Ambode that he would throw them into the Lagoon.”

“Why does he make those Statements on the eve of every election? That is unbecoming of a Kabiyesi of his standing.”

“He apologized for that one saying that he was high on orijin. He asked his boys to drown cans of orijin in the Lagoon instead.”

“I wonder what he will attribute the recent statement to when the backlash comes.”

“Meanwhile, Buhari has gone against his party to say that anyone that wants to go to court over the party’s primaries should do so. Oshiomhole is in soup.”

“He is said to have collected fifty million dollars from aspirants. That is why the DSS detained him. Saraki has asked him to resign from politics.”

“Another pot calling kettle black.”

“Na wa o. Meanwhile the dust is yet to settle on Jonathan’s new book. Isn’t it predictable? leave office, write a book, publish at a sensitive time as on the eve of the general elections and sit back and watch the main actors split hairs.”

“The Borno Governor called the book an elementary book of fiction. Savage.”

“Jonathan said in it that he fought corruption with technology. Biko, is that not a statement of fiction?”

“Shebi they say he drinks ogogoro? I will not say anymore.”

“Gentlemen we must talk about the one hundred and twenty soldiers massacred in Borno by Boko Haram. How bad can things be that terrorists can invade a military base and slaughter soldiers protecting the nation? They did not lay ambush for them; they did not kill them in combat. They entered their rooms and smoked them out. Where was the intelligence? What kind of military do we have? Are we safe?”

“Those that escaped said they were using weapons acquired by Shagari in the early eighties. Weapons that are in the museums in other parts of the world. They could not withstand the firepower of the terrorists.”

“For anyone who did not understand the gravity of the two billion Dasukigate, that is your answer. You share the money for equipping the military and expose young men and women to the early grave. The shame of a nation.”

“And it took Buhari one week to say anything about it. Meanwhile, he responded to Jonathan’s book within forty-eight hours. The price of a human life in Nigeria.”

“If it is not too much to ask, I will say we observe a minute silence for these fallen heroes.”

It was Akunna. It was the first time he was sitting with the elders and he had been sounding all right so far. Now a minute silence? No one wanted to offend him so they all stood when he stood.

As they stood wondering whether to close their eyes or not, Irikefe went close to Achike and whispered: “Bro Achike, as we speak, your small brother Chisco is about to kill the love of your life, Nurse Jo with preek.”

All the blood in Achike’s face drained out.

“If you hurry up you will save her, as you people are toto saviors in your family.”

He strode away and observed Achike from a distance for the rest of the minute’s silence.

Achike all at once was looking like a week old cadaver.



When they sat back, Mr Zubi turned to Agbonyibo and said “Agbonyibo, how are you finding life in our compound?”

“Life e good for here. Everybody nice to me and my family no problem.”

“Ah, good to hear that. Speaking of your family. I hope they are adjusting as well?”

“Yes sir. Dem happy too.”

“So how is business? We have not noticed you doing anything.”

“I dey do plenty things sir. I been tell una say nobody go know say anything dey inside there sef.”

“Does that mean you have some wild animals there already?”

Agbonyibo smiled and said nothing.

“Tell us. We want to know.”

Agbonyibo still remained noncommittal.

“Gentlemen let us not insist. It is his business isn’t it? So long as we are not troubled in any way let Agbonyinbo do his thing,” Mr Zubi said.

“Err sir, I wan beg for something.”

“What Agbonyibo?”

“That old mama for this compound.”

“Which one?”

“Mama Akunna.”

“What about her?”

“I want make she use my shop domot for her business.”

Akunna stood and glared at Agbonyibo.

“What did you just say?”

Agbonyibo immediately prostrated with his belly flat on the floor. “I take God name beg you sir. I say dey sorry for the mama. She ask me and I gree. I just wan tell una.”

“Do you know she is my mother?”

“I know sir. Abeg make we help am.”

“Gentlemen, this Agbonyibo is a good man. We have not seen one with a heart like his. He only just came; maybe only met Mama Akunna once and took pity on her. Let us encourage this kind of spirit. Akunna, let Agbonyibo help your mother.”

“I’ll advise that as you are giving her a place to do business, that you give her a place to sleep as well,” he said and walked away.

“It seems Akunna’s head is getting correct. Today, everything he said apart from the minute silence was okay. And even his anger at Agbonyibo was normal.”

“That does not mean we should let down our guard. He is still a danger to all of us.”

“That is true.”



“So we return to Katakata Street today,” Maya said.

“Yes dear. Our honeymoon is over,” Ndifreke said.

“We should move out. We can afford to now. I can’t imagine going back to share toilet and bathroom with that snake man now.”

“No Maya. It is too soon. As good as this looks, we must not get carried away.”

“We are not getting carried away. We lived there because we were poor.”

“We are not rich now Maya. Not yet. Two million naira can evaporate before you know it.”

“We will get a hundred grand each monthly. We will get by.”

“Seemingly. But know that this is a fickle career. You could break a leg tomorrow or hot water pours on you or a more beautiful girl turns up. What happens? We will have a big burden of rent on our hands. I’ll say we stay on in Katakata street and invest our sign on fee and watch it grow. From the monthly income we also save the much we can.”

“Staying in Katakata Street will guarantee that we break the leg sooner.”

“You have lived there all your life Maya. Let’s just be patient. Gain more experience in our new career, and besides, I have come to love the drama of Katakata Street. It will be difficult to live anywhere else.”

“That is poverty mentally. May the Lord deliver you from that.”

“Amen sister.”



Chisco got dressed and grabbed the bowl of pepper soup. He still avoided Josephine’s eyes. She sat up in the bed n*ked and watched him. Then she stood and went to him, removed the bowl from his hand, placed it on the floor and held him tight in an embrace.

“Why are you still shy?”

“I no shy nurse.”

“Enough. Call me Josephine. You just fvcked me Chisco in case you have forgotten.”

“No talk am like that.”

“What were you telling me in Igbo?” she teased. Chisco smiled and then looked at her. He needed to leave before she realized she had made a mistake.

“I wan go. My brother go don dey find me.”

“Alright. You can come any time you want ok?”

“Okay.”

He cracked the door open and listened. It was the normal sounds of shuffling feet and people making small talk. So he stepped out and hurried down the stairs to his floor. He opened the door of his room and found his brother in a pensive mood. Achike stopped short and regarded Chisco.

“Bia Chisco, where are you coming from?”

“Erm nowhere brother.”

“Nowhere and you are carrying my bowl.”

Achike reached and grabbed the bowl from him and spilled the content.

“Where did you take my food to?”

“Erm, I go give nurse.”

“You took my food to her?”

“I give her small.”

“And you came back with the food. What were you doing there since if she did not even eat the food?”

Chisco said nothing. Instead, he looked his brother straight in the eyes.

It was then that Achike believed. The defiance in the look.

“Is that what I brought you to Lagos to come and do? To be cooking food for ashawo. The ashawo that nearly removed your eye and made me to run helter-skelter in the middle of the night?”

“No call her ashawo brother. Stop am.”

“What? Is it me you are talking to?”

“She no be asawo. No talk am again.”

Achike charged towards Chisco but tripped on the leg of the center table and fell and hit his head on the door handle.

He stayed on the floor and to Chisco’s surprise began to cry.

“Carry your bag and get out of my house.”

“Wetin you talk brother?”

“I say get out!”

Chisco knew his brother enough to understand that his fate was sealed the moment the words left Achike’s lips. He felt sorry for Achike but there was nothing he could do now. He just shrugged and said “Okay. I go go.”



Later that evening, Mama Akunna resumed her ogogoro business in front of Agbonyibo’s shop. She was surprised to see the large turnout of customers on the first day after a long break from the business.

Most of the customers were also customers of Agbonyibo. They sat and drank ogogoro after which they entered Agbonyibo’s shop and come out clutching raffia bags and leaving in a hurry. There was always some commotion in the shop before eventual quiet before the client would step out and leave in a hurry. Mama Akunna then understood why Agbonyibo wanted her in front of the shop. Something went on in the shop before a customer got what they wanted and whatever it was, Agbonyibo did not want the rest of the compound to take notice. Compound members avoided the ogogoro customers as a rule, so no one paid attention to Mama Akunna’s business and so no one would be bothered about whatever it was Agbonyibo did in his shop.

At the moment Mama Akunna gained illumination of the whole thing, she nodded to herself and glanced at the shop. Standing there and regarding her with an icy stare was Agbonyibo, who only seconds before was inside the shop. Mama Akunna quickly looked away and continued doing what she was doing. It was the first time she saw Agbonyibo in real life when he was not smiling.

It was not a look Mama Akunna wanted to see again.


TO BE CONTINUED

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