Martin0:
Dear Future Wife,

There are a few things that you need to know about me. Please sit down and stop what you're doing, this isn't going to be easy to read, nor is it easy to write.

First , you are not the first woman that I have kissed. I'm sorry, but it's true, and I'm sure I will not have been the first man you've ever kissed. I'm okay with this. I understand that things happen and plans fall through.

Second, you are not the first woman that I have ever danced with. After high school proms, homecomings, college outings and random dance parties, you will not have been the first that has had my hand in theirs, nor their head on my chest listening to my heartbeat. Again, I apologize for this but it's in the past and I can't change that, nor would I want to.

Third, and most hurtful of all: You are not the first woman that I've ever loved in my short life here on Earth. Love happens; it's one of those things that will knock you off your feet if you're not paying enough attention, kind of like a truck. For this I am sorry. Love gone wrong can scar so much worse than a knife wound, and sadly, that's what happened to me. Please forgive me for my callousness and short temper. It's not because of you--life isn't sweet to everyone, including me.


I know that this letter has probably been staggering and it may leave you a little more sad than before you read it.

However,
I can promise you with every ounce of my being and my word as a man, that you will be the last woman I ever kiss. Before I met you, everything in this world moved at a breakneck speed, and when your lips first touched mine, it stopped and I was breathless. Thank you.
You will be the last person I dance with. No matter how big of a deal the situation is, whether it's our first dance at our wedding, or in our living room freshly painted. When your hands are in mine, I feel like I can take on the world, I feel complete. Thank you.
Finally, you will be the last woman I ever love. I can say that with full confidence. My heart will never feel as full as it is when I'm with you, as it is when I see that smile of yours. I love you.

victorian:
Eeyah!


That's all I can say to your epistle Martin0

Georgexx1:



I believe with this your letter your mind is set on getting a German wife because if you are thinking Nigerian, you are on your own. As for me and my dickk, i shall cleave a German.

victorian:










Lol German?


No o!


Am confirmed Nigerian.


Lemme see your pic too

victorian:








I'm fine


I understand, it's needed.

But with all the fine babes in your area, one suppose fit your bill nah?

Martin0:


haba oga maka why?

Eberechi24:
Aww! So sweet of you martin0.


The letter isn't meant for me but I can't help blushing.

Martin0:


my dear, nor be their fault oo, and nor be matter of say them full our area, you suppose know say fine babes plenty everywhere..

you know, work nor dey give me time to chyke, but make we cross over first!

Georgexx1:


This your beauty is German made. Just that mother nature gave to a Nigerian. #cutie

victorian:







Na so

victorian:








That's true

Am getting ready for cross over night. All dressed up for it. Pastor said we should wear green or mixture of green.

Let's go there

Georgexx1:


No Nigerian lady will have time for that epistle. The poverty level is too much. You better get rich or get a visa to Germany.

ubunja:
#RedPill forever

Martin0:


Ebere anyi, babe how far na? i see you oo! see iffa catch you for Easth eh, sha u nor wan come home abi? OK oo ar go know if na you work pass

Martin0:


o boy, why you dey wound my small mind nau shuuu be like say them chikalas don do you strong thin before eh? o boy you don't know anything about women! i should be telling you about women not you telling me abeg abeg repent from that kind mind oo before we cross to another hmmmm you know!

again be careful ooo coz if you let our Nairaland Ninja's attack you with their Knives, hmmmm

Georgexx1:


You are really soft and fresh. Are you German? I love Germans

Martin0:


oh really, mehn chai, me too I'm set!just waiting for my friend to shower!

DukeofNZ:


e no dey necessary say you lie to am before you go show say you de interesting in her. she no dey like germany person

victorian:









Lol, abi?

DukeofNZ:


e bi like say na i go come manage you. you go follow me come for my over the sea? talk make i arrange import you for my over the sea here shap shap me i be talk and do. i get am for money

victorian:






Really?

Go and manage yourself in the sea.

Travelling abroad is no big deal for me.

You can't even afford business class air flight ticket! Am even talking of business class, economy sef u no get!

I shame for you.

DukeofNZ:


so as i say make i pity you manage you now you no happy. me i get am for money big big any ticked i can boughts for you. ok i understood say you de shame for here so e go good as you wan sand me private massage i de wait

victorian:







You no well!


You must be crazy!


Goat!

Georgexx1:



I believe with this your letter your mind is set on getting a German wife because if you are thinking Nigerian, you are on your own. As for me and my dickk, i shall cleave a German.

Earthquake1:


Me dey find Japanese

victorian:








Perfect!

My pics in church right now

Already seated

DukeofNZ:


e no dey necessary say you lie to am before you go show say you de interesting in her. she no dey like germany person

DukeofNZ:


e no dey necessary say you lie to am before you go show say you de interesting in her. she no dey like germany person

Belafonte:
How pathetically sad. When a woman decides to marry you, she won't be worrying about all this trash you've listed and apologised for.

She'll be thinking of your social status and how beneficial it will be to her future.

She will be thinking of your financial status and potential if it would be wise to hitch her wagon to yours.

She will be thinking how easy it is to manipulate you to do whatever she wants with as little friction as possible.

She will be thinking how good you are in bed and if you had enough practise before her so you can pleasure her when she deigns to offer you her body.

She'll be wondering about a lot of things that will benefit her in the long term, not this garbage you've concocted.

This letter is so sad, it's almost funny. Pfft

Ask the married women here whose husbands adore them if they'd marry the same man again. This is despite knowing he's trying his best to be the best man to them. Wake the fúck up. Marriage is a scam