This is a personal opinion. You may chose to differ,all good.
Nigerian women according to my research are mostly single when they ought to be married because they are just too available. Take for instance a bachelor who has a different girlfriend wash,iron,cook and clean for him then baptism of fire till dawn. And he has 4 girlfriends. Tell me ?Honestly ,why would he marry any of them as he knows they also have illegal uncles too. And it goes around in such manner with men who have refused to marry but receive the full benefits of a man who has done every marriage rites. So much so that these unmarried guys sometimes have a better leverage than even a legally married man in such position because the ladies are expectant of marriage.
Its a bad spot for Nigerian women,but their free giving action is what i blame. Be wise

Yigiyaga:
This is a personal opinion. You may chose to differ,all good.
Nigerian women according to my research are mostly single when they ought to be married because they are just too available. Take for instance a bachelor who has a different girlfriend wash,iron,cook and clean for him then baptism of fire till dawn. And he has 4 girlfriends. Tell me ?Honestly ,why would he marry any of them as he knows they also have illegal uncles too. And it goes around in such manner with men who have refused to marry but receive the full benefits of a man who has done every marriage rites. So much so that these unmarried guys sometimes have a better leverage than even a legally married man in such position because the ladies are expectant of marriage.
Its a bad spot for Nigerian women,but their free giving action is what i blame. Be wise

At the bolded, talking from experience right. I guess someone called Nwa... comes into play here.

Raalsalghul:
At the bolded, talking from experience right. I guess someone called Nwa... comes into play here.

The misfortune of illiteracy is the shackles it places on an undeveloped mind.

Nairaland has become a space where anyone makes high-sounding, fact-deficient statement without a corresponding empirical evidence to support their claim. Yes, a lot of unmarried ladies (the same is applicable to unmarried men) litter the length and breadth of Nigeria, but mere "availability" -- and, of course, desperation, a term clearly evident in your post, but not stated, can't hardly be the reasons. In most cases, "desperate" ladies who have set marriage as a goal, almost always achieve their objective more than carefree, happy-go-lucky ones who have led themselves up to a blind alley. Note that not marrying not at all -- or even late marriage -- is a social problem to any society.

Again, your post does not respect the geographical and cultural differences that shape and define Nigeria. The social problem you raised does not exist in the north, has a fairly poor showing in the west, but widespread in the east. I will make my case for eastern Nigeria, and I have three reasons.

First, we have a weak, gloom, and hard economy that has contracted the possibility of men getting jobs, and a government policy that has failed to stimulate entrepreneurship. So many men are unmarried because they simply because can't afford it.

Second, if you check the number of people who are victims of natural disasters, violent crimes, those imprisoned, you will discover that men have a highly disproportionate figure than women. These men are supposed to be people's husband in the future.

Third, we have a trend today that views marriage as an insignificantly needless imprisonment, but nonetheless accepts child bearing as a major/only reason for male-female relationship. A lot people have refused to get married because they can easily make babies without accepting the commitment that goes with marriage.

Raalsalghul:
At the bolded, talking from experience right. I guess someone called Nwa... comes into play here.

Akwa

Let the next person complete it

ZinolyOnlineHelp:
Akwa

Let the next person complete it

etiti

ZinolyOnlineHelp:
Akwa

Let the next person complete it

Imagine the op wants us to stand aside and behave as if the cause of his midnight outburst isn't due to recent happenings on this forum.

Confused lots!

When a lady decides to be caring, attentive, and supportive, she becomes too available , desperate and cheap.

But when she decides to put herself first, seek only want you can offer, she becomes a slut, gold digger and a materialistic one. The problem with you overgrown babies is that you do not get to understand what you want before you stopped growing.


Fools!

mrblessed:
Nairaland has become a space where anyone makes high-sounding, fact-deficient statement without a corresponding empirical evidence to support their claim. Yes, a lot of unmarried ladies (the same is applicable to unmarried men) litter the length and breadth of Nigeria, but mere "availability" -- and, of course, desperation, a term clearly evident in your post, but not stated, can't hardly be the reasons. In most cases, "desperate" ladies who have set marriage as a goal, almost always achieve their objective more than carefree, happy-go-lucky ones who have led themselves up to a blind alley. Note that not marrying not at all -- or even late marriage -- is a social problem to any society.

Again, your post does not respect the geographical and cultural differences that shape and define Nigeria. The social problem you raised does not exist in the north, has a fairly poor showing in the west, but widespread in the east. I will make my case for eastern Nigeria, and I have three reasons.

First, we have a weak, gloom, and hard economy that has contracted the possibility of men getting jobs, and a government policy that has failed to stimulate entrepreneurship. So many men are unmarried because they simply because can't afford it.

Second, if you check the number of people who are victims of natural disasters, violent crimes, those imprisoned, you will discover that men have a highly disproportionate figure than women. These men are supposed to be people's husband in the future.

Third, we have a trend today that views marriage as an insignificantly needless imprisonment, but nonetheless accepts child bearing as a major/only reason for male-female relationship. A lot people have refused to get married because they can easily make babies without accepting the commitment that goes with marriage.

Nawa oooo, all this grammar on top a troll?


LordKO come and see your second o.

mrblessed:
Nairaland has become a space where anyone makes high-sounding, fact-deficient statement without a corresponding empirical evidence to support their claim. Yes, a lot of unmarried ladies (the same is applicable to unmarried men) litter the length and breadth of Nigeria, but mere "availability" -- and, of course, desperation, a term clearly evident in your post, but not stated, can't hardly be the reasons. In most cases, "desperate" ladies who have set marriage as a goal, almost always achieve their objective more than carefree, happy-go-lucky ones who have led themselves up to a blind alley. Note that not marrying not at all -- or even late marriage -- is a social problem to any society.

.

You have great wisdom.

I'll give an example of my sister who got married at age 26. After giving birth to her first child, she travelled alone to the U.S. She came back to Nigeria before the expiration of her visa. Then she travelled again, but this time, and unknown to her husband, she had other plans- to live in the U.S as an illegal immigrant.

When she left, she was pregnant.

In my opinion, she had it all planned out. My question always has been: what kind of wife and mother gives up husband and child for a better life in a developed country. Her son was traumatized for the first few years she left, he was barely 2 at the time, but thankfully, 6 years later, he's grown out of it, plus she keeps in touch and ensures he doesn't lack a thing.

However, she and her husband have since broken up and she couldn't possibly care less.

Though I staunchly condemn my sister's methods, I should not blame her entirely unless I want to be sentimental. The same society that condemns her for what she did is the same that would shame her if she wasn't married as I'm typing this.

What if that was her only chance at marriage and having children? In my opinion, my sister played smart and life favors only smart people while the rest of us are shamed for being innocent and naive.

These past but recent experiences have taught me that it's better to have been married than not to be married at all. A friend recently called, we hadn't spoken in a looong while. When he realized I wasn't married, he exclaimed, "a pretty girl like you! Are you sure you're not the problem?". Imagine!

In spite of my sister's shortcomings and failed marriage, my mum still rates her far better than I because of her achievements like children and some money. While, I, on the other hand, a "failure".

Mum will often tell me how I'm no longer beautiful. She would tactically tell me how other people think so too.

For example, on this particular day, I went to her office briefly. On getting home that night, she told me about how her colleagues marvelled at my looks. But that one of them, who also happens to be my mum's close friend told the others that, "ah it's because you didn't know her before now. If you did, you wouldn't say she is beautiful".

Mum sometimes tells me how she's never happy seeing me around. She's ashamed, I guess, having an older, unmarried woman in her house.

Wouldn't blame her though, most nigerian mothers are seriously traditional. Even worse, I'm not working, though I try not to eat her food. I feed from my little savings, while my dad funds my professional exams.

This is just to make a simple but relevant point that contrary to what Op thinks, any woman who is desperate to get married will get married.

MariaLavina:
Confused lots!

When a lady decides to be caring, attentive, and supportive, she becomes too available , desperate and cheap.

But when she decides to put herself first, seek only want you can offer, she becomes a slut, gold digger and a materialistic one. The problem with you overgrown babies is that you do not get to understand what you want before you stopped growing.


Fools!

the guy Na correct fool

Unik3030:
the guy Na correct fool

An imported one.

MariaLavina:
Nawa oooo, all this grammar on top a troll?


LordKO come and see your second o.

Lol. Confession time: I've been learning and copying from you covertly - don't bother to sue me because I'm only imitating not duplicating, so I haven't done any wrong according to international law. Las las I may reach halfway your height even though I've empty head.

LordKO:


Lol. Confession time: I've been learning and copying from you covertly - don't bother to sue me because I'm only imitating not duplicating, so I haven't done any wrong according to international law. Las las I may reach halfway your height even though I've empty head.

Pulling my legs or trying to make me blush on Sunday is a punishable offense.

What would intelligent , confident and knowledgeable LordKo want to learn from a playful, merry go round me?

Yigiyaga:
The misfortune of illiteracy is the shackles it places on an undeveloped mind.

ignore him

MariaLavina:
An imported one.

you people should stop insulting him. It is very bad to use what happened here to label him bad.

vingeophysicist:
you people should stop insulting him. It is very bad to use what happened here to label him bad.

What happened here?

MariaLavina:
Confused lots!

When a lady decides to be caring, attentive, and supportive, she becomes too available , desperate and cheap.

But when she decides to put herself first, seek only want you can offer, she becomes a slut, gold digger and a materialistic one. The problem with you overgrown babies is that you do not get to understand what you want before you stopped growing.


Fools!

Who provoked elegant lady. Don't mind the OP, it's obvious he's just trolling, because from all indications he's a responsible man.

Meanwhile, personality of the man he (the OP) impersonated/presented is a typical hallmark of a narcissist - meting out of selfishness and unfaithfulness while expecting altruism and faithfulness.

LordKO:


Who provoked elegant lady. Don't mind the OP, it's obvious he's just trolling, because from all indications he's a responsible man.

Meanwhile, personality of the man he (the OP) impersonated/presented is a typical hallmark of a narcissist - meting out of selfishness and unfaithfulness while expecting altruism and faithfulness.

Lol. Truth is , I hate it when men sulk. An experience with one or two persons doesn't mean you have to put all other persons in a basket. Plus what put is he trying to make? Women should not be available anymore? How can a man just wake up and come to such conclusion without putting into consideration the dynamic nature of the world he lives in. What works for A might not work for B. You don't reason for all!.

You may be right, I don't know Op, neither do I know his real nature. All I know is this thread sucks


You see, grammar too much for you. When I saw your submission on the other thread, I thought you were trying to justify the narcissist by differentiating between an egoistic person and a narcissist. You placed so much emphasis (negative descriptions) on an egoistic person than a narcissist.You got me confused, but then I didn't want to disturb your zodiac debate with MzJoy.

MariaLavina:
Lol. Truth is , I hate it when men sulk. An experience with one or two persons doesn't mean you have to put all other persons in a basket. Plus what put is he trying to make? Women should not be available anymore? How can a man just wake up and come to such conclusion without putting into consideration the dynamic nature of the world he lives in. What works for A might not work for B. You don't reason for all!.

You may be right, I don't know Op, neither do I know his real nature. All I know is this thread sucks


You see, grammar too much for you. When I saw your submission on the other thread, I thought you were trying to justify the narcissist by differentiating between an egoistic person and a narcissist. You placed so much emphasis (negative descriptions) on an egoistic person than a narcissist.You got me confused, but then I didn't want to disturb your zodiac debate with MzJoy.

No, I didn't justify narcissism, instead I tried to point out that there are other similar traits worse than it; Like egoism and egotism. Actually, only the near-lowest of the human order are narcissists. A sane and sound person cannot be caught possessing such a toxic trait or wishing to possess it. Under normal circumstances, narcissists never command association, trust and respect of established, privileged and enlightened people. As subjugation personify, only the social and economic impaired can put up with them - thus, the reason a narcissistic grown-up man can only wish for a naive girl for relationship and marriage.

However, as toxic and nauseating as they're, I still prefer them to egoists and egotists - this is the exact point I was trying to make on that thread - because they hardly hide their selfishness and hypocrisy.

The truth is we have many more single mothers than single girls without children why greed,lack of morals to make a happy home and still more greed this is why there are more single mothers out there than single girls

Derea:


You have great wisdom.

I'll give an example of my sister who got married at age 26. After giving birth to her first child, she travelled alone to the U.S. She came back to Nigeria before the expiration of her visa. Then she travelled again, but this time, and unknown to her husband, she had other plans- to live in the U.S as an illegal immigrant.

When she left, she was pregnant.

In my opinion, she had it all planned out. My question always has been: what kind of wife and mother gives up husband and child for a better life in a developed country. Her son was traumatized for the first few years she left, he was barely 2 at the time, but thankfully, 6 years later, he's grown out of it, plus she keeps in touch and ensures he doesn't lack a thing.

However, she and her husband have since broken up and she couldn't possibly care less.

Though I staunchly condemn my sister's methods, I should not blame her entirely unless I want to be sentimental. The same society that condemns her for what she did is the same that would shame her if she wasn't married as I'm typing this.

What if that was her only chance at marriage and having children? In my opinion, my sister played smart and life favors only smart people while the rest of us are shamed for being innocent and naive.

These past but recent experiences have taught me that it's better to have been married than not to be married at all. A friend recently called, we hadn't spoken in a looong while. When he realized I wasn't married, he exclaimed, "a pretty girl like you! Are you sure you're not the problem?". Imagine!

In spite of my sister's shortcomings and failed marriage, my mum still rates her far better than I because of her achievements like children and some money. While, I, on the other hand, a "failure".

Mum will often tell me how I'm no longer beautiful. She would tactically tell me how other people think so too.

For example, on this particular day, I went to her office briefly. On getting home that night, she told me about how her colleagues marvelled at my looks. But that one of them, who also happens to be my mum's close friend told the others that, "ah it's because you didn't know her before now. If you did, you wouldn't say she is beautiful".

Mum sometimes tells me how she's never happy seeing me around. She's ashamed, I guess, having an older, unmarried woman in her house.

Wouldn't blame her though, most nigerian mothers are seriously traditional. Even worse, I'm not working, though I try not to eat her food. I feed from my little savings, while my dad funds my professional exams.

This is just to make a simple but relevant point that contrary to what Op thinks, any woman who is desperate to get married will get married.

Thanks for the compliment. Note that you equally exude intelligence, wisdom, and knowledge.

I have to read your post two times to ensure I properly thoroughly digest its contents. While reading, a legion of thoughts competed for prominence in a matter I designate as personal, and which I am not supposed to explicate on. As it were, I notice that you adjudged your sister's action as appropriate, due to the nature of its outcome -- even though you couldn't hide your reservations. One basic attribute of desperados is that they rarely care about what people say, neither do they aligning their objective in accordance of the moral code of their society. Who are we to judge them, especially when they become successful?

However, I felt bad reading your challenge and concern, which are not uncommon with every man and woman of marriageable age. But it is obvious that women bear most of the pressure than men. The difference is the disposition of our families; how they view and treat us and the extent of the support they provide. Family should endeavour to assist and encourage, not shame, stigmatise, and demean.

So, please cheer up. You have a whole lot ahead of you.

MariaLavina:
Confused lots!

When a lady decides to be caring, attentive, and supportive, she becomes too available , desperate and cheap.

But when she decides to put herself first, seek only want you can offer, she becomes a slut, gold digger and a materialistic one. The problem with you overgrown babies is that you do not get to understand what you want before you stopped growing.


Fools!

From the OP's submission,he said "his personal opinion",which signifies he had always come in contact with some dead ducks,despondent and inconsolable breed of women...take for instance,my ex usually wash,cook,clean and sometimes bathe me,yet...she WASN'T TOO AVAILABLE.


P.S the insult was unnecessary...he simply need to up his game.

After "bad relationships" they start dropping nuggets. They become philosophers...

MariaLavina:
Confused lots!

When a lady decides to be caring, attentive, and supportive, she becomes too available , desperate and cheap.

But when she decides to put herself first, seek only want you can offer, she becomes a slut, gold digger and a materialistic one. The problem with you overgrown babies is that you do not get to understand what you want before you stopped growing.


Fools!

I love this comment dear, some folks are just no more in their right senses anymore

This is very correct. I am reminded of a quote I saw on another thread: "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"

MariaLavina:
What happened here?

Address what he wrote instead of insulting him.

pocohantas:
After "bad relationships" they start dropping nuggets. They become philosophers...

The OP is preparing e-slap for you.

Derea:


You have great wisdom.

I'll give an example of my sister who got married at age 26. After giving birth to her first child, she travelled alone to the U.S. She came back to Nigeria before the expiration of her visa. Then she travelled again, but this time, and unknown to her husband, she had other plans- to live in the U.S as an illegal immigrant.

When she left, she was pregnant.

In my opinion, she had it all planned out. My question always has been: what kind of wife and mother gives up husband and child for a better life in a developed country. Her son was traumatized for the first few years she left, he was barely 2 at the time, but thankfully, 6 years later, he's grown out of it, plus she keeps in touch and ensures he doesn't lack a thing.

However, she and her husband have since broken up and she couldn't possibly care less.

Though I staunchly condemn my sister's methods, I should not blame her entirely unless I want to be sentimental. The same society that condemns her for what she did is the same that would shame her if she wasn't married as I'm typing this.

What if that was her only chance at marriage and having children? In my opinion, my sister played smart and life favors only smart people while the rest of us are shamed for being innocent and naive.

These past but recent experiences have taught me that it's better to have been married than not to be married at all. A friend recently called, we hadn't spoken in a looong while. When he realized I wasn't married, he exclaimed, "a pretty girl like you! Are you sure you're not the problem?". Imagine!

In spite of my sister's shortcomings and failed marriage, my mum still rates her far better than I because of her achievements like children and some money. While, I, on the other hand, a "failure".

Mum will often tell me how I'm no longer beautiful. She would tactically tell me how other people think so too.

For example, on this particular day, I went to her office briefly. On getting home that night, she told me about how her colleagues marvelled at my looks. But that one of them, who also happens to be my mum's close friend told the others that, "ah it's because you didn't know her before now. If you did, you wouldn't say she is beautiful".

Mum sometimes tells me how she's never happy seeing me around. She's ashamed, I guess, having an older, unmarried woman in her house.

Wouldn't blame her though, most nigerian mothers are seriously traditional. Even worse, I'm not working, though I try not to eat her food. I feed from my little savings, while my dad funds my professional exams.

This is just to make a simple but relevant point that contrary to what Op thinks, any woman who is desperate to get married will get married.

It's well dearie.. That you are not married doesn't mean that you ain't desirable.. Don't let anyone make you feel otherwise (even if it's momsy)

Ples I receive interview from resonance consults yestaday can u ples help me confirm?