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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. (42743 Views)
My Personal Observation About Nigerian "Adults" / What’s The Difference Between Nigerian Marriage Law And The West / Happy marriage Life (pic) (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 10:44am On Feb 27, 2019 |
error4040: Kind of Japanese guys worry about sexuality. Many peoples think Black guys have big one. So that means girl or woman who had relationship with Black guy before, They think that girl or woman's private parts is wide or loose. Some of them think they can't satisfy them. So they don't want kind of woman. But not everybody like that ![]() 2 Likes |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by error4040: 11:46am On Feb 27, 2019 |
peacefull: ![]() ![]() ![]() hahahahahaha! this is sooooo funny. 1 Like |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 2:52pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
error4040: ![]() Even some of them think about kind of women like to have sex so much ![]() I think I can say many Japanese think Black guys = have big one. I'm not sure. But I think I can say many Japanese. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by error4040: 6:09pm On Feb 27, 2019 |
peacefull:OK my next question might sound personal 2. you once mentioned you're in your late 30's. in your own view how can you explain life in Japan as a Japanese |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 6:56am On Feb 28, 2019 |
error4040: Yes. I'm 39years old. Will be 40. I love my country. I'm proud my country. I think every countries have strong points and weak points. Japan also have it. Some peoples say old days were good. But some peoples say this days is good. Maybe living in Japan is not easy. But convenient. I mean about cost. But that is every where same. We have 4 good seasons, have good places, But also have many disaster. We learn how to save ourselves in school. Not everytime fearing disaster. I think manners and moral is very important for Japanese. Many peoples judged other person from manners and moral before know that person's humanity. Japanese are difficult to talk true feeling. We are hiding true feelings. We are difficult to say Yes or No straightforward. We don't wanna make bad feeling for other person. We don't wanna disturb or bother for other person. Of course not everybody. Some peoples can say anything whatever they wanna say. 3 Likes |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 8:28am On Feb 28, 2019 |
peacefull: Dai Jo bu? Your typical Japanese reactions of politeness and refusal to offend this husband of yours makes you an excellent Target for him to practice his manipulation skills. If you said he is Igbo, then he is from the place Nigerians call the east. From all your posts the man is definitely married or having a relationship with a Nigerian women while all you do is pine after him all day. He probably has up to five children while you are waiting to understand his behaviors. I have seen a Nigerian man in America do that. He's enjoying his life while you're feeling sorry for him. You should feel that way for yourself if you think he's not doing anything with another woman when he's in Nigeria. He is always offended/angry because he is looking for a way to get rid of you, probably. Nigerians are cheats, both their men and women. They only want to be with foreigners for their money. If you don't spend on them they will not like you. And they always run back to Nigeria to have relationships with other people because the only people who can satisfy them are their selves, so that they can cheat each other and nobody is offended. 4 Likes |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 9:07pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Tellemall:Exactly my personal experience! And realizing that, I didn't stay married to my Nigerian ex for years, few months and he went back to Nigeria claiming it's all my fault and I disrespect him telling in his face no other women in my house, in my life and he should go back to his kids and women whom he was hiding from me. Dear Japanese lady, check his phone and his chats, I didn't check but he left his chats open in our bed and beeping was bothering me and I did see sex chats and traditional wedding planning with a Nigerian woman and so much cheat. Check his phone and his chats or if he claims to be genuine to you, ask him to open his phone for you and check chats and texting. When I did see, I got the other women names and talked to them in Facebook, some were very honest and told me how he lies to them too. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 9:49pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Angela777: I'm sure he was a very convincing actor until you caught him out. Those are their methods and they see nothing wrong with it. If you ask them, you are their "maga". I hope you have recovered from the treachery. He will probably gaslight her until she thinks she is hallucinating his behavior and that she's the one with the problems and can't understand him when the truth is that he is the one with the problem. He will keep getting upset to throw her off his trail then come back and act good to keep up the deception. Nigerians do not have real love. They only know how to use people because the poverty of Nigeria is such that they are dying to have any way out at all. She presents him the perfect opportunity and one that he will exploit emotionally. The more she apologizes the better his control evolves. I know how many business "partners" have been humble, helpful, stolen my money, gotten what they want and then their true nature of deception becomes obvious. To the average Nigerian, love and Marriage are a business in which they must make the most profits and 419 scam you. If you are doing business, stay away from the ones from Benue, Kogi, Akwaibom and Delta. Their criminal intent is genetic. The only Nigerian you can get close to is a Nigerian who did not grow up in or around Nigerians. 2 Likes |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 9:56pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Tellemall:All true. He was so sweet and convincing, the sweetest person I ever met. Then angry all the time. Now he is so much in love with me again and wants to be back to me and America, ha. Lady, believe your instincts, your eyes and his actions. Do NOT believe his words. 1 Like |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 10:16pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Angela777: ![]() 143. Oops. 419. Don't worry, she will learn sooner or later what is going on. 1 Like |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 10:25pm On Feb 28, 2019 |
Tellemall:True. Sad she wasted so many years but maybe she enjoyed all these years the life with him and the easy part, they don't have children together, so if they go apart one day, not so much suffering. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 3:58am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Tellemall: Wow ![]() Daijobu desu. Arigato gozaimasu!! My reply made feel bad and angry for one person who wanted give me advice in here. I never meant make him angry. But I did it. That is so bad. I'm really so sorry for him. About my husband, He is not so easy to get angry with me. But He is very stubborn. Sometimes he don't wanna hear me and can't get my point what I want him to understand. When I married with him, difficult to told him what I don't like or I don't want him to do something. I was tried to stand it. But when I couldn't to stand it again, I told him with my anger. Now I know that was bad. So one day he told me that I don't need to stand it. If I don't like or I don't want, just tell him straightforward. He said he can't understand why I tried to stand it and just making stress myself. Then I started tell him little by little. Now I can tell him what I don't like about him ![]() Typical Japanese is making him feel bad? I was really bad wife. Maybe wicked wife. I think he tried and still trying to be with me. That's why I can't say he is a bad person. Maybe sometimes he treat me bad. But I also sometimes treat him bad. When I realized my bad, I said sorry. But if I don't think I'm not bad, I can't say sorry. That he taught me. If he married with me because of money, that is big his mistake. Because I'm not rich. If he married with me because of Visa, that is successful. But if his plan is married with Nigerian woman then dump me, that is still not success ![]() If he wanna cheat on me or already cheating on me, he should not bring that matter for our marriage. He should not make me doubt him till I die. If someone married with him after me and know about he already married with me, I'm really despise her and my husband. But if that is their culture, I can understand. I don't like. But I can try to understand. Maybe something I can't understand. But I can't understand doesn't mean I can blame or insult their culture. I have to have respect for other cultures. Anyway, Thank you so much advice me. I'm really appreciate you. I'm really Daijobu desu! Arigato gozaimasu!!!! |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 4:24am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777: Thank you so much sharing your experience. I'm really appreciate you. I'm very sorry for your experience with Nigerian husband. I always wonder that why someone still wanna play with women or men but get marriage ![]() Kind of person should be stay single and just having fun with their single life. So no one complain them. They shouldn't make hurt for someone and waste someone's time. Cheating is every where. I will talk about chat with him. Maybe he will not tell me. But I can talk with him about that. If he has a another wife, I really like to know what kind of woman he married with and wanna see their kids if he has. I'm not like before. I had learn many many things. So no more too much sad and hurt ![]() |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 4:29am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Tellemall: Is he controlling me? |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 4:46am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777: My husband is not romantic man. Not sweet man. Because he don't love me? I thought because of his character. My mom told me before that romantic guys sweet words is for every women ![]() Your ex husband in love with you again? He regret about lost you in his life? I will always keep your that advice in my heart. Thank you so much. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 4:49am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Tellemall: I'm still learning many things ![]() But I'm so confusing again. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 4:59am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777: Please I want you to understand me. I don't have a child with him. But he always tell me he is a father of my child. Even if that is a lie, I'm really glad and appreciate him. If I divorce with him, that will so hurt me. Doesn't matter if we loved each other or not. Almost 15years is not short time for me. Have a child or not, lose someone who spent long time with me and my child is will be suffer me. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 5:10am On Mar 01, 2019 |
peacefull:I understand you very well and as a woman I know if you go to divorce it's a big suffering. I was referring you have no small children together and if there will be a divorce and separation, the little child won't suffer and you as a mother will not suffer for his child being apart of the father. It's great he took your child like his own, Nigerian men usually are good fathers and love children. I don't say he is not. I was talking about a woman - man relationship and how painful is the divorce, specially if it involves children. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 5:40am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Dear Peacefull, we all wish you well and as I see it worked for you for 15 years your marriage with your Nigerian husband, he didn't leave you when you were arguing and as you said being a wicked wife, you are still together and now you even saying you try to understand his culture and if he is polygamist, you will try to understand that and to meet his women and kids. Maybe it will work for you this way, maybe he loves you more than you think because of being so understanding? We all are different. Here we chat but it's YOUR life and it is YOUR decision what to do and how to do in your marriage. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 5:49am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777: Thank you so much!! And I'm sorry If I misunderstand your words. I'm really sorry. Yes. Divorce is not easy. I already have a child before I met him without marriage. This my marriage is my first marriage and more than 10years. I think both of them tried to keep our marriage till now. Many times We talk about our old days and how was my child when child was small. Sometimes We talk like more than our age. When I have time with him like that, I'm always forget my doubt for him at that moment. I maybe lucky because I don't have a small baby now. But I really wanted have a baby again. My child is not small now. But still young. I want my child always be happy. I don't wanna make sad. I maybe don't know how to love partner. That's why always hurt. Even my past. I have no confident about love anymore ![]() He is my husband. But sometimes my Dad, sometimes my brother, sometimes my son,always my best friend. I can't hate him. I'm really sorry if I made you feel bad. I'm really glad I met good peoples like you on here. We are same woman. I'm really happy you understand me. Thank you so much! I'm really really appreciate you!!! |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by peacefull(f): 5:59am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777: Thank you so much!! I maybe very confusing again. I will ask him many things again. Now he knows I had learn and still learning many things about Nigeria. I'm always keeping everyone's advice in my heart and head. Oh! I like to see his kids if he has. But I don't wanna see his wife ![]() I just wanna know what type of woman he married if he has. I'm really soooo appreciate you!!!!! |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by nurey(m): 7:18am On Mar 01, 2019 |
I have a thing for Asian women ![]() @peacefull Nigeria has 3 dominant language Hausa (Northern part) Igbo (Eastern part) and Yoruba (Western part) this are also the dominant language in that part but not the only language. It just like an outsider who meets you and hear you speak your language that outsider would conclude you are speaking Chinese because China is the most popular country in Asia. You have been given good advice and enlightenment about your marriage so I won't wanna delve into it. The only thing that scares me about Japan is the Yakuza gang's, the way they are potrayed in films and games makes me think they will just stab anybody they hate on the street. Is it true? ![]() |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 8:11am On Mar 01, 2019 |
peacefull:Dear, married your husband in Nigeria or not, no difference. He travels and stays for long in Nigeria, he has women there and Nigerian women knowing he is living and working in Japan are going easy with him and having kids from him because they believe he has money and he will support them, specially if she has his child. In Nigeria is not easy life for a woman with no husband or a man giving her money and Nigerian women are very money oriented. So your husband and his friends are going each year to Nigeria and stay there for long because they feel there so easy to have any woman he wants and women don't care if he is married in Japan. I would worry if my husband doesn't care to lose his job in Japan and travels to stay 1-3 months each year, usually in Nigeria they are clubbing with friends and women, drinking, smoking and partying. And yes, he is coming back to you because he needs to make money in Japan and he needs you, it's more easy to live together and paying bills, than alone in Japan, also as a man he needs a woman in his bed in Japan and Japan is not Nigeria, not easy to go and get any woman there. Personally I don't stand cheaters and all the nasty deceases they bring. Just be careful and take care of yourself, think well and see what is good for YOU, it's time you look after yourself, not always about others. 2 Likes |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 9:34am On Mar 01, 2019 |
peacefull: I mean that the typical Japanese is a very polite individual who does not wish to offend anybody. You apologize a lot. I had a friend from Japan and even if you offend him, he is the first to apologize. No expression of anger even when he must be boiling inside. His honor, second to none. That aside, provided you can accommodate your husband then that is fine. But some men control with anger and/or silence. They do it so that you keep begging them and feel that you are at fault. That way they can make demands of you and you, being eager to please and appease their anger, will do whatever they want you to. If you find yourself apologizing to one person all the time then something is wrong. That person is controlling or doesn't value you much. You are not wicked if you make him "angry". It is in human nature to offend. Nobody is perfect. How you deal with it is what makes the difference. Perhaps he married for a permanent residence, shi ri ma sen, nobody but him knows. Some Nigerian men prefer to be secret bigamists until they are uncovered. Time heals all wounds. And time exposes all secrets. Sayonara. PS: don't mind my bad Japanese. I have tried to learn it from watching Naruto. ![]() 1 Like |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 9:39am On Mar 01, 2019 |
peacefull: I can't tell. But if he travels to Nigeria for months on end to the same place his supposed family is and you do not suspect him, you are probably in his jaws already. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 9:42am On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777: You've said it all. Though peaceful sounds a bit curious about the other wife if any. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by error4040: 12:30pm On Mar 01, 2019 |
Tellemall:I refuse to believe this Statement. Cheating can never be Generalized to a whole Nation. And Nigerians been with Foreigners for their Money is Also False!!! Did you know that South African Ladies Admitting that Nigerian Men are the most Caring Men to set foot on their soil did Trigger The Xenophobic treatment from south Africans towards Nigerians ?? Just because you have come across Certain Number of individuals do not give you the Right to Generalize. Please we won't accept This. And lastly I checked Statistically We are no were Among the top 10 nations or country with high rate of Cheaters! https://www.indy100.com/article/most-adulterous-countries-world-map-affairs-cheat-unfaithful-french-survey-7424631
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Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by error4040: 1:03pm On Mar 01, 2019 |
Angela777:nicely said |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 6:51pm On Mar 01, 2019 |
error4040: OK. |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by error4040: 7:47pm On Mar 01, 2019 |
Tellemall:Well you can Say it however you like, but Generalizing is False. Tellemall: Wait Did you just mention Nigerian men using Voodoo on south Africans ? ![]() ![]() ![]() Now this is some funny shit Tellemall:As they Say Different tales for Different folks. please just don't tag a Whole nation of 190million people as Cheat or scammers because we still have millions of honest Individuals thank You. 1 Like |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Nobody: 7:59pm On Mar 01, 2019 |
error4040:it is wrong to say all but it is ok to point to the very common particular nation character. error4040:True. Nigerian men use juju on foreigners and Nigerian women use juju on their Nigerian men to manipulate, to attach the person, to get money from the person, etc. South African men complain and mad about this practice as there are cases of married women, no man would like to see how the Nigerian make his wife an obedient fool and takes their hard earned money. Same happens in Ghana, Ghanaian men know well, get very mad about it, ask them. And if you look at foreigners, specially white ones, so much juju manipulation and rip off is going on. error4040:Yes, there are good people in Nigeria but living their lives between so many cheats, bribes, braking the law, even the most honest and innocent Nigerian is way much smarter and cheat comparing to other nations, it's the way to survive in Nigeria and all learn from childhood. 1 Like |
Re: Pls, I Want To Know About Nigerian Marriage Life. by Tellemall: 8:22pm On Mar 01, 2019 |
![]() error4040: I said charm. C. H. A. R. M. What is voodoo about charm? Please don't change the meaning of a word to suit your understanding of it. Charm is not voodoo. It is a quality of a person. 1 Like |
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