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My Husband And His Mother!!! / How I Felt Reading Messages Between My Husband And His Mistress - Lady / House Girl Peeps While Husband And Wife Were Having Sex (2) (3) (4)
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Re: urg by Samshumy: 2:32pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UjuJoan2:Food and sex can be got outside. Olosho Dey instamesssge. Na to order 1 Like |
Re: urg by UjuJoan2: 2:37pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: Again, easier said than done. Except of course you marry someone you don't love. 4 Likes |
Re: urg by Samshumy: 2:38pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UjuJoan2:Well that’s true in the case of love. If you really love someone, you would try and please them once in a while 6 Likes |
Re: urg by UjuJoan2: 2:39pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: I'm glad you agree. |
Re: urg by goodnewscliff(m): 2:40pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
davenaija:if ur patner act stupidly in matters like this,,, and u could keep ur cool,, then be cool!!!!!! goes both ways with a naggy and useless wife!!!!! if everyone reacts to every action,, then u re both stupid and senseless!!!!!! if one is hot,, its wise for the other to be cool it not necessarily a gender thing!!!! use discretion wen quoting me next time or u regret it!!!!! |
Re: urg by Samshumy: 2:44pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UjuJoan2:But it’s always nice for the wife to please the husband always. That’s why we have maids to take care of chores 1 Like |
Re: urg by davenaija: 2:44pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
goodnewscliff: The energy that belies the comment speaks volumes. I pass IJN. Can't lose my lid over you, never 1 Like |
Re: urg by goodnewscliff(m): 2:47pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
davenaija:i regret the 300kilobyte wasted on this ishh |
Re: urg by Tiabaj: 2:49pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
hmmm.. It is no longer about Op and her husband again...## Thread hijacked!!! 5 Likes 1 Share |
Re: urg by davenaija: 2:50pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
So many emotional and character underdeveloped men in this generation. I feel sorry for ladies. Psychiatry would be bae in years to come from these glaring pointers 1 Like |
Re: urg by UjuJoan2: 2:51pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: The wife has a million way of pleasing the husband and making him happy, fro. Her very first chore in the day to the very last. 1 Like |
Re: urg by Sanchez01: 3:04pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
drmikeadams:That part dulled my reasoning a while! Sometimes, I even wake up in the middle of the night to bathe again despite doing so before going to bed. There are people in this world! |
Re: urg by drmikeadams(m): 3:11pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Sanchez01:me wey like smoke after each smoke for bathroom I don pour water..how some people dey sleep well widout niight shower ayam not understanding |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 3:15pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
kross01: Complete husband and father 5 Likes |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 3:21pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: Master and slave Relationship in marriage is not a bad thing? Seriously? And you are advising the husband not to help with chores? Is this how you run your home? Marriage is a partnership...a joining of two people to make their lives better. Two are supposed to be better than one. 3 Likes |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 3:29pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
From your writeup, your husband is selfish. He doesn't want his life to be too altered with marriage. He still wants to have his sleep, freedom to do anything he wants at anytime He has not yet accepted the responsibilities that come with being a husband and a father. As the kids grow up, they will most like grow distant from him and it is later when they are adults he will wonder why they don't relate well with him. It is not rocket science. He is not getting involved in their lives... ordinary revision with them he cannot do. He cannot sacrifice his time and energy for them. Doing chores or helping with the kids doesn't make a man less than he is. I cannot count how many times my husband has cleaned the house, done laundry, etc. I even live our kid in his care if i have to go out and he is home. Marriage is a joint force between two people. All those abusive words need to stop. They don't help a person's self esteem especially when it is coming from someone who is supposed to love you. Enough said 8 Likes |
Re: urg by Nobody: 3:30pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UyaiIncomparabl:lol |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 3:41pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: Very apt. You analyzed it so well especially the bolded part. A lot of Nigerian men have this twisted mentality about marriage being a place for them to play god and institute a dictatorship atmosphere. It's really sad 1 Like |
Re: urg by davenaija: 3:48pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UjuJoan2: OP as much as I don't disagree with this Individual, I beg you to not follow the counsel numbered one. Ignoring your husband would escalate issues, Incite avoidable anger and make these simple issues complex. Never approach issues from a combative standpoint. That would lead the journey a wrong path. Do not be combative with him this way, rather report him to someone he respects Getting him to pour out pent-up energy and discharge is a way for him to process his internal energy which he doesn't know he has issues with. Though there's need for his attentiveness to his own destructive habits to be brought to his attention. This is your prayer point. You know what to do. |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 3:50pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: Is that how you run your home? What is wrong with a man doing chores? Is he above it? Didn't he wear the clothes that need washing? Doesn't he live in the house? Will it deflate the ego? |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 3:55pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: Ok. We see where you learnt it from. Upbringing really plays a major role in marriage. Most ladies should observe their men's fathers to have an idea of who they are marrying and what they are getting into. 3 Likes |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 4:01pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy: Where did you get this orientation from... that chores are for women? You are not married yet and are still looking at marriage from the point of view of boyfriend and girlfriend. 1 Like |
Re: urg by davenaija: 4:01pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
ImaIma1: Different strokes my lady. My father was abusive. In fact all the great guys I see today many had abusive dad's. Self realization and cognitive ascendence helped us understand things better in order to chart a different course than our dads. Best guys for ladies to date.. Guys that are on the path of awareness, mild and positive self consciousness and improvement, this breed strives to be better day in day out. Anything less is a no brainer. 5 Likes |
Re: urg by pcicero(m): 4:09pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
I wish I had seen this earlier. Many kids here making dumb comments. I don't mean to be rude. Madam, no two marriages are the same. Stop comparing yourselves with others and quit making others your yardsticks. Now, I have been married for years and I can relate with many of your issues. 1. Your husband is not cruel or insensitive, he is who he is. He is hardworking and earns well, so he believes he deserves a good life- a wife who keeps the home and cares for his kids. Not too much to ask for as a successful young man. He has advised you to get a house help, he means it, some guys are not so domesticated, I am and it's because I have free periods sometimes and you women so take such men for granted. What if he doesn't put his dirty clothes in the laundry baskets? I don't always do it, though I do my laundry. In actual fact, I help my spouse with hers. But, I am not that tidy too. I had to tell my wife to stop complaining because you can't have it all. Solution: Get a maid that will stay long or come over the weekends to do laundry and other stuffs as he advised or quit whinning. 2. He doesn't stay in one church. You ladies are quick to decide on churches and settle into them, but it takes a while for some of us especially when you are not called to serve. I prefer the MFM, my wife thinks they are too sanctimonious. She chose another church, quickly settled in and dragged me in with her. The result- I started skipping church regularly for years until I found my way back to MFM. She goes to her own church. Solution: If a one church solution doesn't work, I know it's cumbersome and somehow unreasonable for Christian families to worship in separate churches, but try to know what he seeks. 3. Talking rudely. We all do. Great that you also talk back and spit your own. However, now that you've known him, is it not better to let him vent and reasonably tell him after some time how he hurts you with his words? It works for me. Though we still have issues but we just assume that we're in it for life. No pun intended. Also, you truly seem like someone that relies on people's opinions to take decisions. Especially if your confidants are outsiders, no man likes it. My wife spends a lot of money on ideas that a simple search on even Nairaland would have revealed to be a scam, but she will still do it in spite of all her educational qualifications. Once some of your friends convinces you about something, it becomes sacrosanct. Solution: Seek your spouse's opinion on most issues, no matter how trivial. We feel involved and secured that way. It works both ways. Above all, learn to tolerate one another. I have been with adults and they tell me there are no quick fixes, just enjoy each other and know that it is meant to last forever. As for weekend baths, when you can't tolerate it any longer, suggest outings like malls and visits to relatives or friends. Put on seductive lingerie and make him want you, then send him to the bath before accepting his requests. Wish you all the best. 6 Likes |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 4:11pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
davenaija: But he decided to follow his dad's footstep even if he probably saw his mum stressed. It shows he regards women very lightly. 1 Like |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 4:14pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
UyaiIncomparabl: You should have decoded that the guy has some upbringing issues. It has affected the way he treats women and besides when he gets married, real life will hit him |
Re: urg by davenaija: 4:15pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
ImaIma1: Mental awareness. Until people become conscious of their destructive tendencies and empathise with their actions, change is impossible. Actions are poured out for our " internal mould". Unless these moulds are broken either by external brute force or personal will of the doer, their mental pathway continues making it impossible for change to occur or even the possibility of them K owing their actions are wrong. It takes Grace for one to be attentive to personal misgivings |
Re: urg by Chuks9000: 4:39pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Samshumy:is laundry not part of house chores? 1 Like |
Re: urg by Kindheartedd: 4:46pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
.. 4 Likes |
Re: urg by ImaIma1(f): 4:58pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
davenaija: But he on the other hand doesn't see anything wrong with his actions and mindset. To him, he has to be a god in his home. He will love only when it is convenient and wouldn't want to be disturbed with the process of running the house. His upbringing has made him selfish. And he already has divorce as an option even before getting married. Not everyone should get married. Selfish people should not bother themselves with marriage 1 Like |
Re: urg by davenaija: 5:01pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
Kindheartedd: Let's us K ow where we got it wrong after you both read through. Finally I suggest he tells you how he feels when he feels upset with you. This way he doesn't bottle up things too much and expresses himself when it has piled up. I think people call it effective communication in marriages. Please find this book and read it Talk your way to an intimate marriage. Dr Harvey sumfin. Any couple that read this book would be glad they did. Your hubby loves you but his way of doing a few things an be very petty. Do not seek any form of distance with him. Work thru your issues privately, do not be to open to counsel. Receive sound counsel only when the counsel edifices and is positive. Even counselors are dodgy. God bless your union. 2 Likes |
Re: urg by davenaija: 5:02pm On Apr 16, 2019 |
ImaIma1: Why stress yourself my lady |
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