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Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 9:34am On May 09, 2019 |
It’s not a secret that communication is a very important aspect of any relationship, but we have noticed that what people do not know is how to be a good communicator and the benefits of building good communication habits into your relationship Although there is no easy solution because every relationship is unique in its own way and poses different challenges. That’s why we would be sharing a few communication tips that can help both with difficult conversations and good communication on a day to day basis. 1. Don’t sweep things under the carpet It can be really tempting to avoid certain discussions to “keep peace” but the risk is that you keep on holding things inwards, you keep on having resentments towards your partner, and it keeps piling up till you can’t take it no more. It’s better to get little things out in the open early and as regularly as possible instead of keeping things to yourself and having one big fight which could be damaging emotionally or could shake the foundation of the relationship. Although it’s better to let little thing go, but if there is any issue you just can’t take your mind off, it’s very important you let your partner know. 2. Don’t put your partners on the defensive It’s easy to react to a disagreement with your partner by telling them everything you think they are doing wrong and making lots of accusations. But the problem with this is that it’s likely to make your partner more defensive, instead of listening to your genuine concerns, they would get interested in defending themselves, spend more time in proving you wrong We recommend that you talk to your partner calmly and tell them how you feel. For example a woman wants to address her husband’s late night activities, instead of saying “why are you so inconsiderate and self-centered, don’t you know you coming home late makes me worried?” she could say, “babe, whenever you stay out late, I get worried, sometimes I can’t sleep, I can’t even eat anything because I am worried, I would really appreciate it if you reduce the number of hours you spend outside with your friends, it would make me happy, thanks” It shifts the tone of a disagreement and makes it less likely to spin out of control. 3. Pick a place and time Most times it’s not just about what you say and how you say it but also when and where. Partners are advised to plan to have discussions at specific times and places. Be sensitive about your environment, don’t just bring up discussions just anywhere, be emotionally intelligent enough to not embarrass your partner publicly, even if that was not your intention, at this stage intentions don’t matter, it’s your actions that speaks. 4. Make time to talk and listen Many people assume that communication is just about being heard, but that only half of it. The other half is getting feedback from your partner, that is, hearing each other. Lots of the time when we are having a discussion, we are just waiting for our turn to talk back, we are hearing what they are saying but we are simply concentrating on our response. In your mind you would be like ‘that’s not true, I didn’t do that’ we begin to get defensive, which is understandable because no one loves to hear something they didn’t do or they disagree with. But in order to truly understand your partners’ perspective, you really have to pay attention and have the endurance to take in whatever they are saying while it’s their turn to talk. It isn’t necessarily about agreeing with each other, it’s more about understanding one another and acknowledging your differences so you can move towards finding a solution. 5. Practice The final tip on this topic is to remember that communication is a skill and you can only get better at it by practicing. If you want to develop your ability to communicate as a couple, it’s important that you build positive habits in the way you talk and make genuine efforts to always stick to them. Some days you would be better, some days you won’t be able to cope at all. But if you persevere you will find out overtime that your ability to state your disagreements calmly and your ability to listen while your partner speaks would have improved greatly. If you are interested in chatting and meeting people from all over Nigeria and some parts of Africa, you could try out this app, it’s called SHUGA. It’s a free dating app. I have tried it and I love it, you should too https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.dating.shuga&referrer=utm_source%3DNairaland 2 Likes |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by Stacy889: 9:05am On May 10, 2019 |
great read! i follow your account religiously hrhmuyi11: |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 9:11am On May 10, 2019 |
Stacy889: thank you, i really appreciate your feedback |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by Nobody: 9:26am On May 10, 2019 |
Op sef, that's why JAMB & WAEC do not release results on time... simple topic and u re writing long sermons. Relationship doesn't last because; (1) He is broke. (2) she denies him sex. SHEKINA !!! |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 9:37am On May 10, 2019 |
chenzen: Lol so a relationship cant survive without money and sex? |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by Nobody: 9:39am On May 10, 2019 |
hrhmuyi11:u just said it. money & sex finish ! |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 10:00am On May 10, 2019 |
chenzen: answer na |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by Nobody: 10:01am On May 10, 2019 |
hrhmuyi11:that's it... as if u don't know |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by aytuns(m): 10:56am On May 10, 2019 |
chenzen: money and sex without communication??. is she a one time object or someone you want to have TILL DEATH DO YOU PART? |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by aytuns(m): 11:00am On May 10, 2019 |
hrhmuyi11: Nice job sir |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by Nobody: 11:37am On May 10, 2019 |
aytuns:u sef |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 12:42pm On May 10, 2019 |
bro then you haven't gotten the woman for you chenzen: |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 9:10am On May 13, 2019 |
thank you! aytuns: |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 9:11am On May 13, 2019 |
my point exactly. people dont want to work towards having a good relationship, they just feel everything should fall in place Rubinas: |
Re: Ever Wondered Why Your Relationships Don’t Last? Sometimes It's Not Witches by hrhmuyi11: 9:11am On May 13, 2019 |
lol chenzen: |
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