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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad (89860 Views)
Don't complain that your husband is cheating on you if you are on this table / Don’t Kill Your Husband. This Is How To Deal With Him If He Is Cheating On You / "My Husband Got Our Neighbor Pregnant, They Are Both Begging Me"-woman Cries Out (2) (3) (4)
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Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by jazzy16(m): 9:12am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Firstly two things biblically can make marriage end : infidelity and death of a partner. That is if you want to go that way Secondly men are moved by what they see. I would advise you work on yourself, loose weight and take proper care of yourself. Wear revealing clothes around your husband no wrapper tying o. Thirdly if you a full time housewife, I would advise that you look for something to do. Empower yourself. Finally live your life to the fullest ignore him and take care of your child |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Ginalex(f): 9:12am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Penisinpenisout:You are mad for saying this ![]() 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by janga02(m): 9:15am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Pls don't make your decision while angry, because you may live to regret it later. Work on your self and God will guide you to the right path to follow. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Charmingpet: 9:15am On Jun 05, 2019 |
JoannaSedley: |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by imitateMe(m): 9:21am On Jun 05, 2019 |
kennygee:You try. At least not all women have fish brain. ![]() |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by imitateMe(m): 9:23am On Jun 05, 2019 |
JoannaSedley:Why are you so aggressive? You ought to encourage her to pray and love her husband more, cook good food for him and submit totally to him. Please reconsider. Thank you dear. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by imitateMe(m): 9:26am On Jun 05, 2019 |
ifyalways:Bad advice. Women should always love and pray for their husbands no matter what. You need to start encouraging other women to adore and submit totally to their husbands. Even if he beats her, she should still love and respect him. I hope you'd do the same, dear? |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by imitateMe(m): 9:30am On Jun 05, 2019 |
ibkayee:You need to encourage her to pray and love her husband unconditionally. It may be difficult to tolerate the abuse, but there is no other way than praying for him, looking the best you can for him, preparing the best dishes for him, be willing to even die for him! ![]() Women must be submissive totally. I nevertheless admire your willingness to help solve her problem. ![]() |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Nobody: 9:32am On Jun 05, 2019 |
I think OP married out of desperation. I pray you get strength to go through this 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Ginalex(f): 9:33am On Jun 05, 2019 |
grandstar:Loud it so those "pray for him crew" will hear. You pray for someone who deserves to be prayed for not this one. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by imitateMe(m): 9:34am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Mznaett:True love is about being ready to sacrifice. You see, my dear, I love advising women to shun the fish brain attitude and embrace true love and sacrifice. The woman needs to love, care, pray and submit totally to him. She can also lay down her life for his. ![]() |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by PapaAdanna: 9:36am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Skmoda360: Ha ha ha so you already know una, Noise makers ![]() |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Nobody: 9:36am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Glorylynn:God bless your soul |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by TheKingIsHere: 9:37am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Needtolove: So sorry dear but don't do anything irrational. Just pack your things and kids and leave the marriage. You deserve better 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Mznaett: 9:39am On Jun 05, 2019 |
imitateMe: ![]() ![]() ![]() |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Nobody: 9:42am On Jun 05, 2019 |
merahki: Tell her to leave na. Quit the marriage and go rent or go back to her parents place or possibly marry another man who might also end up a cheat. Nothing happens when nothing happens. There can't be lizards in the home if there were no slips either in form of cracks in the wall or the door been left open. It may not be her fault expressly, but it may be her fault impliedly or may not even be her fault at all. He keeps complaining about her weight, I guess that didn't start today, but how has she approached his complains. Don't forget men fall for what they see and as do women for what they hear, hence the saying" marriage is continuous work". It may be the man's fault entirely cos he is damaged by society and faulty foundation mostly caused by broken or unstable homes. I have seen the deja vu in my practice as a behaviorial psychologist. I hated my dad for cheating and infact, I disowned him and left the house at 16, never looked back cos of that. Basically denied him the right he exercised over me as a parent. Went rogue. ![]() Approximately 20years later, I find myself doing exactly what I almost killed by poor dad for, with no reason or moral justification at all. Though I have been able to manage the pains and emotional trauma I have occasioned, but I can't take it away completely. I often sit down and wonder why? I married the most beautiful, honest, loyal, God fearing, better cook and what have you, lady that has ever walked the face of this planet. So why cause her irreparable pain and psychological damage? I don't know. But the questions that occured was not why I do what I do, but having realized how my choices and life style affects those I can care about, what was I gonna do about it? I have since taking responsibilities for my actions by desperately trying not to subconsciously become like my dad who unconsciously found himself acting the way he knows best cos that was how the father before him and his foster uncle acted. Every once in a while, I slip when she is getting to trust me denovo and trust me I do hate myself for it as I find myself all alone without my best friend. Your husband is trying desperately to free himself from his regrets that is eating him from within by trying to accept his stupidity and foolery as an acceptable way of life, hence the reference to African men. Which he knows deep down is a LIE. A stupid coverup. Even when an African man marries more than one wife, he never disrespects the first. It's a fact. He tries desperately to make other women respect the first, so that he can atleast have a peaceful home. Your husband is in the ring with his worst monster, which is overpowering him and he is gradually submitting. He is hurting you as a way of escaping his own realities confronting him. Perhaps he married you in the first place to fill that void, which is now wider than ever. Hence his solice in nagging the living day out of you and his resort to the believe that since you have failed to fill that void, another woman might be able to. It's not your fault, it's his insecurities and low self esteem eating him out from within. Deep down within him, he knows, the new mad woman he is using as facade, won't last more than a year or two. He either moves to another or finds a way out of his mess with some scars for being in the cheating ring too long. Mind you, this can also be caused by the kind of friends he keeps or what he reads. There is a thread on this forum that was my greatest undoing until I found a way round it's influence as a young married man. Now that you know the most possible root cause of the problem, what are you going to do about it? If you don't have the energy to fight for your marriage and beat his ass with the application of your superior emotional intelligence into a responsible married man, you should walk away, quit the marriage which is way easier to do at this time. Well, until realities sets in when you are out in the cold after ten years out of marriage. Perhaps maybe you find a man who wouldn't use adultery to mask his inadequacies as a fast failing man. But most man have what they use. Some take religion as their own narcotics rather than alcohol, weed, sex, gambling or what have you! But if you wanna fight, then you should set a war room in your house were you cry out to his Maker. The heart of a king is in the hands of his maker. Don't confront him, confront the God who gave him to you with His words. And read books and also listen to audio tapes. You ve' got millions for free on YouTubes. Nothing is new under the sun. Find out how others before you did it. Report him to his God. This is exactly what my wife did. She bleeping reported me to God rather than confront me directly cos I was bleeping tired of the marriage and just needed a way out. It was not what I expected. Just a different ball game and I wanted a fast escape by any means possible. Has her prayers be working? Like magic cos I as a spiritual man on my own accord, I soon found my self with an invisible big bother who makes my life miserable each time I fall outta line. He whoops my ass back in line and she just sits back and enjoys my silent torments while sipping kunu or zobo. My invisible friend made me realized exactly what was going on with me and why I did the stupid things I did. Am I perfect? No , but I have since become a better man who has began reading books on how to keep a better and happier home. Mind you, I did far worse than your man has done all together but she fought against me, and for me side by side on her kneels and with her tears. Today, I got an invisible big bro that fights with me to ensure I don't go back to Egypt no matter what. We are not there yet, but things are not what they were years back. Guess you learn from my story. 5 Likes |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Nobody: 9:44am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Acidosis: I like your comment very much no need to beat around the Bush and state the next step. Sadly the emotions/kids involved is what makes families stick together. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Juliearth(f): 9:52am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Needtolove: I feel angry reading this. Even though I am not married, I can feel your pain, my mother has been there and I know how bad it hurt then. If wishes were Horses, I would develop some wings, fly down to your base and give your husband some resetting slaps. Now let's focus on the way forward. If you don't mind, I would like to let you in on how my mother handled her situation. See, you cannot continue to hurt like this,else you will end up with HBP(my mum is still battling to regularise hers). You need to create an ideal world of your own even while in your husband's house. Do not leave since domestic violence is not in play. Try to go out alot and have fun. If you are a graduate,dust your CV. Else, go to school. You should also work on your self esteem, you are not ugly, the baby weight will fade off( you can catalyse this process though by working out and eating healthy). Dress nicely, love yourself! Love yourself and love yourself even more. You need to realise that your happiness is not tied to a man. Do not confront the lady, don't confront your husband either( unless if he is failing to provide for you and your kids on grounds of his infidelity). Do you know that Karna is real and it has no cool? For each affair that my father has had, karma always sets in to deal him some good blows and in the process reset his head into default and homely mode. All you need do is pray for him. Wish I can send you some reassuring hugs, but it's well. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Mariangeles(f): 9:53am On Jun 05, 2019 |
kennygee:I have so many unpleasant things to say to you but the problem is I don't know where to begin ... ![]() A woman might be dying and your type will still "pray for him" ...who prays for the woman ? ![]() |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Juliearth(f): 9:56am On Jun 05, 2019 |
JoannaSedley: Divorce isn't always the way out. A child is involved, have you thought of the effect divorce would have on this child. I know you are entitled to air your opinion,but let's be guided on the kind of counsel thst we give because this woman is broken. Inasmuch as domestic violence is not involved, she needn't leave. As for the mental abuse, a revamped self esteem would help counter the after effect. She needs to build a world of confidence around her and get something doing to keep herself busy. The man is a prodigal son and when life deals him some blows, he definitely would trace his way back home( they always do). |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Heavance(m): 9:57am On Jun 05, 2019 |
SageMK: Thank you for that. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Heavance(m): 9:59am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Oblongata: Wow.... Something to learn from. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Safiaa(f): 10:06am On Jun 05, 2019 |
How can you body shame a woman who has given life to your offspring? Absolutely disgusting behaviour, men like this deserve to die. Honestly. Their heart is too black to be alive. 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Wahleehk10: 10:10am On Jun 05, 2019 |
ifyalways: I can relate to that. When I was in the world, my galfrnd prayed such prayer and it was answered cuz my Nicodemus couldn't function in a foreign land. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by clefstone(m): 10:17am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Mznaett:hahaha. Then don't get married. The possibility that your husband will cheat when u eventually get married is ninety something percent. The problem with the OP's husband and the main reason for her hurt is not the cheating but his disregard for her. yes, discovering the cheating will hurt but the lack of remorse is heartbreaking and shattering |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by ibkayee(f): 10:25am On Jun 05, 2019 |
sod09:All threads asking for advice will be one sided stories though, we can’t confirm everyone’s side for everything na. Best we can do is deliberate on how plausible the post is and go from there and in this case, her story is not far fetched at all. If the husband now comes on to give his own story then ehen we can compare 1 Like |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by ibkayee(f): 10:26am On Jun 05, 2019 |
imitateMe:I don’t believe in unconditional love unless it’s my child Pray fire ![]() 1 Like
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Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by ibkayee(f): 10:29am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Mbakuthegreat:
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Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Champneys: 10:33am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Needtolove: Ok. |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by trapQ: 10:40am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Thank God you know you're an Ewu. Chiefochiefo: |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by Oyindidi(f): 10:42am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Pray? ![]() ![]() Africa man kee you there! |
Re: My Husband Is Cheating On Me With Our Neighbor! Hurting Real Bad by trapQ: 10:45am On Jun 05, 2019 |
Oga, like I said what you don't know is bigger than you. Even in Nigeria you cannot have more than one legal wife. That is the standard. You can have 100 wives and everyone knows that person is your wife but you cannot have more than one legal wife. Don't advise ladies what to do when you've not felt 1% of their pain. For every peaceful polygamous family you know , there are at least 20 violent ones and besides that's not what we're talking about here. Come back to give this same advise when you have a wife who cheats with your neighbor and gives no fvck about it. ikennahillary: 2 Likes |
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