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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / I Need Your Advice Nairalanders (2782 Views)
Please, I Need Your Advice Nairalanders.. Please Read.. Thanks / I Need Your Advice Nairalanders. / Please I Need Advice... Nairalanders Help Me (2) (3) (4)
I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by hesilo(m): 3:12pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
THIS IS LONG BUT KINDLY BE PATIENT WITH ME I once had a girlfriend during my University days, we vibed so well and became dat enviable duo, but at some point, she came up with some non challant attitude(you know women things na) and our relationship suffered little squabbles, and finally she left me. I wasn't mad she left but i was really in love with her though. All the while we were in this relationship, i never had sex with her though, we only had days we cuddled(smooching and kissing) and that was it. She got another boyfriend and moved on and i did too. Fews years later after our graduation in 2010, she went to serve in one of the states in the East and i was posted to the North, we missed path completely even though i was later redeployed to serve in one other state around the Eastern part of the country. We met couple of times and were just relating on casual bases. Just after service she got married and had 2kids with her husband, but currently they are divorced. It happened that i got to work in a state where she moved to. I am gainfully employed and she kinda got to contact me, ever since we had a date, it's been like she missed it in life, cos the kinda love she brings along is so much than i can even handle. We started having sex and it was like we are already married, cos she does attend me with so much love and respect and always had this look like she really made a mistake in the first instance by leaving me. Truth is she's currently pregnant and i don't know what to do. I just can't tell my family i want to marry a lady who's got two kids, they would actually disown me. I kinda love her but i'm stuck in btw the devil and the deep blue sea. What's the best way to approach this situation...only good and mature contributions, cos ur contributions might be helpful with my decision. Thanks |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by Nobody: 3:18pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
simple pull over and take a lone long walk make sure u dont look back. goodluck 4 Likes
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Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by donbachi(m): 3:18pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
"the child who is not embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth" 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by pocohantas(f): 3:21pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
It happened that i got to work in a state where she moved to. I am gainfully employed and she kinda got to contact me, ever since we had a date, it's been like she missed it in life, cos the kinda love she brings along is so much than i can even handle..We started having sex and it was like we are already married, cos she does attend me with so much love and respect and always had this look like she really made a mistake in the first instance by leaving me. Truth is she's currently pregnant and i don't know what to do Good thinking, Good product. I love that babe. 6 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by SageMK: 3:23pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
The first 10secs after ejaculation, what do you feel when you look at her? This is very paramount to your decision because it's at that moment you know if it's love or lust. Anyway, she's pregnant already. Start saving. You can't add to her burden and run away. Whether you accept her as your wife is up to what you feel for her. Sooner or later, your parents will be aware. 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by Nobody: 3:24pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
Too deep for my understanding. Let's wait for the experienced ones ![]() |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by ibkayee(f): 3:30pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
pocohantas:Lmao jackpot 2 Likes
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Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by Emotionss: 3:32pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
What do you mean by you don't know what to do ? You need to sit up and be a man. You should have thought of the pros and cons of sleeping with her without condom. Anyway congratulations 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by phelonrays: 3:33pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
All the while we were in this relationship, i never had sex with her though, we only had days we cuddled(smooching and kissing) and that was itHere you were a gentleman minding his business...... We started having sex and it was like we are already married, cos she does attend me with so much love and respect and always had this look like she really made a mistake in the first instance by leaving me.But here you were overcome with LUST.....cause I won't acknowledge that the sex part was out of LOVE ........... You might be feeling so complicated now... I know.... but please.... planning otherwise [as men in this situation usually do ![]() Welcome to DADDY WORLD....... ![]() #BestOfLuck 2 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by CosmicPhoenix: 3:34pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
the best approach to this problem is an abortion or dump her and let her carry the pregnancy all by herself,how sure are you the pregnancy is yours?i dont trust this single mothers. |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by AmazonTopaz(f): 3:34pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
hesilo:Why didn't you think about the children before you agreed to shag her. Since you love her marry her. 5 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by waleyp(m): 3:38pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
So Ready To CaTer For Another ManS KidS?Its She Will Be Your Wife Or Your Baby MaMa , The Lady Is In Trouble Tho What If You End Up Not MarrYInG Her Which Man Would Want To MaRRY A Lady With More ThaN Two Kids For Different Men, She Left You Tho And She Got Back Or You Got Her BackWell I AmNot A CounCelor |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by CaptainMitch: 3:40pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
Toyota, I loved that advert pocohantas: |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by AmazonTopaz(f): 3:43pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
CosmicPhoenix:Just listen to yourself. ![]() Why do you support irresponsibility in men and give silly excuses ![]() 8 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by nuelsam: 3:46pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
U were in a relationship then suddenly she started acting funny and dumped ya ass not minding the emotional trauma she has caused u,no remorse whatsoever and jumped into another relationship barely a while after break up for a richer guy i suppose . When she realised the fact that u have a job now, she wanna come back and judging from ur grammars, u are willing to take her back if there aint no hindrances....... Op, to knack ur head just dey hungry ME!........ U and thousands of sissy men out there are the reasons why women see men as toys they could control anyhow, she got ur mumu botton........ ........ U had better wake up from that illusion u called love...... There aint no love anywhere man, where was she when u had nothing ? Where was she when u was struggling ? Do u even know the genuine reason she divorced her husband ?........ Oh oh, uve even impregnated her, abeg abeg abeg carry ur cross........ Be looking for advice when uve already made up ya mind! 8 Likes
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Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by CosmicPhoenix: 3:47pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
i am not supporting the op ![]() AmazonTopaz: |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by BuddhaPalm(m): 3:48pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
The goat whose owner gives grass dey think say e love am. All fakery man... Just trying to trap you now that she's pretty much "finished" and can't do better. 1 Like |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by AmazonTopaz(f): 3:48pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
CosmicPhoenix:Ok ![]() |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by hesilo(m): 3:55pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
SageMK:You know this babe was the kinda girl everyman would want as theirs, i felt lucky back then school days cos she accepted me while the rush on her was way beyond her. I was like a king back then too cos every nigga den saw me like i was Leonardo Dicaprio with Kate Winslet. It brought me so much reps then. She loved too well then too. I got some genuine love for her. She was stubborn then sha, but her sturbborness wasn't when i was with her, she summits all to me. We had minor issues and the sturv we had got sour and she moved. Even after she left, i knew she wouldn't be an easy person to handle by anybody she ended up with cos i knw how i managed to control her(She needs High level of intelligence to control). When we "re-engaged", she actually told me, i have been the only person she loved genuinely all her life. I kinda loved her too cos she got all a woman should have(Brilliant, shapely, and smart). I would have loved to marry her, but the issue is just the Kids. |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by hesilo(m): 3:57pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
pocohantas:The said lady ain't jobless, she too got a nice job and from a well to do family, just incase you feel she needs somebody to claw to. |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by Deepfeel(m): 4:00pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
hesilo:Hmm she made a mistake in life ended up with two kids divorced, now she lured you into the same mistake she made and your mistake is already pregnant, guy forget all this respect and love thing you are talking about that's how married ladies behave towards their ex lovers, my first love got married she's with three kids now, she respects me more than she does her husband always telling me bad things about her husband, how her husband is cheating doesn't love her anymore bla bla bla she's just waiting for me to make the move so she can divorce her husband for me I know the trick am always given her positive advice towards her husband, for your ex to marry that man and have 2 kids for him means she once loved him like she loves you now, nothing special, but am not trying to discourage you though, if you love her and you are sure you and her can build a happy home with her ex husbands kids and yours then go ahead, stop worrying about your parents disowning you cause you yourself is about to become a father 16 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by xpac01(m): 4:01pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
hesilo: She contacted you, you guys had a date, you spoke with her, you go to know she has two kids, you took her home, started smooching, pre-intimacy for some God knows how many minutes, you bleeped her without condom, you poured inside.... And now she's pregnant you're looking for who will tell you to dump her ehn kwa ![]() ![]() Guy better go marry your marry oh. No come disturb me here again. BTW na you kuku carry yourself submit to the devil so don't think of swimming to any deep blue sea. Don't scatter an already broken heart. 5 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by hesilo(m): 4:05pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
nuelsam:She leaving me then wasn't a matter of concern for me, cos i needed a lil more focus with studies, when she left, it actually made me buckle up(Like doubled my reading habbit), like it was a spur to move up and succeed. I felt she at a point felt she was falling her hands then and wanted to "act up" a little to test my reliance...which didn't come so she sustained her move. She's not a poor girl/lady, she's employed and from a well to do family. |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by bethyz(m): 4:05pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
One thing the lady wants to eat her cake and have it same time.whatever that means . She left you years ago got married and got divorced with two kids then she found her way back into your life and you two had it till she got pregnant for you. She just wants to retrace her step and feel all will be as she wants. Maybe get you to marry her then her plan is complet. She would feel she has corrected the mistake she made long ago. But what she doesnt know is you may not be her husband. The mistake has been done. But going back to you and getting pregnant is wrong. I just hope she is financially stable and capable or the father of the two kid. But if she feels you are the good and perfect husband she made mistake of leaving and she came back its fine by her. Back to what you will do. 1. Do you love her and want to be with her despite all odds. Everything may be good now but marriage is different. 2. What happens to the kids she has even if you marry her they come to stay with you or with their father? 3. If you want to be with her talk to your parents about it and see there reaction first. They may say its up to you. 4. Be ready for anything that comes out after it. The children's father may or will always be in the picture. Goodluck 1 Like |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by ecstasy357(m): 4:05pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
pocohantas: Haha haha... Devil pikin! U nor go tell d guy d truth? |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by ecstasy357(m): 4:09pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
BuddhaPalm: FINALLY, THE TRUTH. OP, HERE IS THE TRUTH. SHE'S NOT YA WIFE. PLS DO THE NEEDFUL, CARE FOR YA BABY BUT NEVER AGAIN GIVE INTO AN ADULTEROUS WOMAN |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by DancingSkeleton(m): 4:19pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
YOU'RE THE MOST STUPID PERSON I'VE EVER COME ACROSS ON NAIRALAND , SUCKER FOR LOVE . NOW YOU'RE TRAPPED , ANYWAYS YOU MADE YOURSELF A PRISONER OF YOUR STUPIDITY 5 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by LordKO(m): 4:27pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
It's quite unfortunate that you have mistaken subservient actions and inactions of a disingenuous woman for respect, love and whatnot goodness. Sorry. Undiscerning people like you have been making disingenuous women (people) to appear smart/clever automatically, since time immemorial. When you allow, intentionally or unintentionally, a disingenuous woman to perpetrate her sly act against you, you automatically give her reason to believe that her sly skill is potent, and by extension, consciously or unconsciously, validate her arrogation of supreme smart ass. 23 Likes |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by carter009(m): 4:33pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
Some guys get mind sha. |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by hesilo(m): 4:35pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
bethyz:One nice and mature advice. Thank you |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by Nasri100(m): 4:36pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
Some people are just primed for stress in their lives. Walah go dey one corner, you go try as much as possible to inherit am. Whether everything ends good or bad, it’s you that will dance to the music. Not nairalanders. Just you! |
Re: I Need Your Advice Nairalanders by hesilo(m): 4:38pm On Jun 20, 2019 |
ecstasy357:Nice suggestions, but I want to be clear, is it still adultery now that she ain't into any marriage? |
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