calgaryFriend:
I can relate with you OP. For me I am outside of the country and I already made up my mind not to marry from outside the country. I have been meeting people online but after relating with them for sometime I realise the extent of how ignorant, materialistic and focus-less most ladies are.

I was following up with a lady last week, then I saw her whatsap status - ENU GBE, E FUN MI LOWO ENU GBG (i am broke, please give me money I am broke). What kind of human being comes on social media to write such trash ? People dont even have respect for themselves or their families.

WheN i WAS in school I was placed on minimum wage and I tried to live within my means how can people just begin to behave like peasants, so that pissed me off and I just cancelled that babe.

The next one was even a little promising but on 2 occasions I was speaking to her and she was speaking to other people, imagine chatting someone and they admit they are also chatting up to 7 people at the same time.

Then I rebuked the person and the next few days we are talking on phone and the person is typing and after I asked what was going on she said she was chatting with people while speaking with me on whatsap call, I did not even react, but I just cancelled her in my mind.

It is quite tough really, the quality of women out there is really very low, we just have a few who are young and have proper sense.

Goodluck as we continue to search...

Hmmm, if you are this conclusive and impatient then finding a partner might be difficult. If everybody is always picking minor mistakes from their partner same way you are doing nobody will settle down oo. What if what she posted on her WhatsApp status was just a mere post that has no serious thing attached to it? We are different though, but a times what we post on social media does not truly reflect the type of person we are, just that one post shouldn't make her materialistic. I think you should have taken your time to study her more.

The other one, what if those chats are important chats too? To me it doesn't matter if she was also chatting them so far she was replying you well. There maybe other things about her that are good but you couldn't even notice out of impatience and hasty conclusion, please try to be calm next time. Choosing a partner isnt what can be done in a hurry. Shalom!

Chaii!

AntiBrutus:
Naso e dey be o.

Na when e reach time to settle down,

You will realise girlfriend plenty, but wife scarce.

Men dey, na husband be problem.

You see the one wey fine, e no get sense.

The one wey get sense, she no get nyash...no sexual attraction.

The one wey get nyash, she too like instagram and snapchat. In fact, na undercover-slay queen.

The one wey get everything you want, she is in a relationship.


This life ehn...

Just a select few will be lucky to see every they want in one.

Last last, so many will have to compromise.

You see that your list and standard, you go dey reduce am small small.

Kwinesther:
Hmmm, if you are this conclusive and impatient then finding a partner might be difficult. If everybody is always picking minor mistakes from their partner same way you are doing nobody will settle down oo. What if what she posted on her WhatsApp status was just a mere post that has no serious thing attached to it? We are different though, but a times what we post on social media does not truly reflect the type of person we are, just that one post shouldn't make her materialistic. I think you should have taken your time to study her more.

[b]The other one, what if those chats are important chats too? To me it doesn't matter if she was also chatting them so far she was replying you well. [/b]There maybe other things about her that are good but you couldn't even notice out of impatience and hasty conclusion, please try to be calm next time. Choosing a partner isnt what can be done in a hurry. Shalom!

I did not cancel her out immidiately, I spoke to her gently and let her know it is disrespectful to the other person. I have asked her out and I have even gone as far as letting her know I really would love to start a serious relationship with her, the fact she still continued after I let her know I dont like that shows 2 things.

1. She does not understand the word respect. My time is also precious and I have many people to chat but I show respect to her by not chattin g multiple people at the same time. HOW can you be discussing with someone about how you guys want your future to look like and she is typing away while still on the call ? You may justify of trivialise that but it is a red flag. Mutual respect is important in any relationship.

2. She may have another relationship or several other relationships.

E don reach dis stage??i neva knew.

calgaryFriend:
I can relate with you OP. For me I am outside of the country and I already made up my mind not to marry from outside the country. I have been meeting people online but after relating with them for sometime I realise the extent of how ignorant, materialistic and focus-less most ladies are.

I was following up with a lady last week, then I saw her whatsap status - ENU GBE, E FUN MI LOWO ENU GBG (i am broke, please give me money I am broke). What kind of human being comes on social media to write such trash ? People dont even have respect for themselves or their families.

WheN i WAS in school I was placed on minimum wage and I tried to live within my means how can people just begin to behave like peasants, so that pissed me off and I just cancelled that babe.

The next one was even a little promising but on 2 occasions I was speaking to her and she was speaking to other people, imagine chatting someone and they admit they are also chatting up to 7 people at the same time.

Then I rebuked the person and the next few days we are talking on phone and the person is typing and after I asked what was going on she said she was chatting with people while speaking with me on whatsap call, I did not even react, but I just cancelled her in my mind.

It is quite tough really, the quality of women out there is really very low, we just have a few who are young and have proper sense.

Goodluck as we continue to search...

it still baffles me why you would wanna leave all those sophisticated nigerian women in Canada to come search for a Homebase,naturally entitled chick with little or no sense of independence
ABI are you scared of alimony/child support?
What happened to acquiring properties ashore,offshore stashes or acquiring in other people's names?
Remember,you can't give what you don't have!
Anyways,I'll let you make your choice so you see how it pans out.who knows,you might get lucky.
Good luck men

Ishilove:

It seems you are a very difficult, rigid and impatient person.

no, You got it wrong.

Infact, it is rude to talk to someone else when you are already in an active conversation.

These are subtle signs people ignore and then start to complain after marriage.

Iogobenz:
it still baffles me why you would wanna leave all those sophisticated nigerian women in Canada to come search for a Homebase,naturally entitled chick with little or no sense of independence
ABI are you scared of alimony/child support?
What happened to acquiring properties ashore,offshore stashes or acquiring in other people's names?
Remember,you can't give what you don't have!
Anyways,I'll let you make your choice so you see how it pans out.who knows,you might get lucky.
Good luck men

Brotherly everything is not always the way you see it, until I got here before I realised that marrying a white/foreign raised woman is a lot of work.

We are totally different from this people, I mean the African way of thinking about marriage is different from the way Caucasians and those raised in the west think.

Our values as Africans if followed are the best for a family, people here dont respect marriage, a divorcee lady but close to me was telling me about her own friend whom her husband left her and went to marry another guy, you can just marry someone for 10 years and they wake up one day and say they are lesbians.

The west is turning to something else and except for a very small percentage of people most people here dont respect marriage and do not see a problem with divorce so as a focused and family oriented guy it is best to come back home and marry someone that has the same outlook as you.

In addition most Nigerian single ladies here are very old, most are over 30 years, and for me anybody over 25years old is a no no....

sarutobi:


no, You got it wrong.

Infact, it is rude to talk to someone else when you are already in an active conversation.

These are subtle signs people ignore and then start to complain after marriage.

Your head dey there, the problem is that most people these days were not properly raised and they do not know how to behave. The only thing I owe you is a correction once, and I corrected her and she still continued, imagine discussing future plans with someone and they continue chatting with others.

That kind of red flag is a no no... I have not told her I am not interested again sha, I already toasted her before this happened and she said she will give me a feedback, she is expecting me to ask her how far now I just lock up I am not even chatting her again . When she chats me I just respond and move on and say thank you.

I am sure she is ready to tell me yes, but as far as she has not said yes to me she cannot claim I broke her heart

calgaryFriend:

Brotherly everything is not always the way you see it, until I got here before I realised that marrying a white/foreign raised woman is a lot of work.

We are totally different from this people, I mean the African way of thinking about marriage is different from the way Caucasians and those raised in the west think.

Our values as Africans if followed are the best for a family, people here dont respect marriage, a divorcee lady but close to me was telling me about her own friend whom her husband left her and went to marry another guy, you can just marry someone for 10 years and they wake up one day and say they are lesbians.

The west is turning to something else and except for a very small percentage of people most people here dont respect marriage and do not see a problem with divorce so as a focused and family oriented guy it is best to come back home and marry someone that has the same outlook as you.

In addition most Nigerian single ladies here are very old, most are over 30 years, and for me anybody over 25years old is a no no....

I never said marry a foreign woman!
I said Nigerian women in the West who know what they are doing.
I will never marry a foreign woman too!
There are lots of single nigerian women out there especially in calgary.i know because my sister is there too.
But I agree with your whole old age talk because before the average Nigerian woman will fix her immigration status,finish school and get a job,she probably must have hit 30.
You've just got to compromise on that one.afterall age is nothing but a number right?
Or do you want to come home and puck one of them leeches?
Or the ones that have managed to gather not much but start acting all high and mighty?
Anyways,your choice.
I wish you the best bro.

AntiBrutus:
Naso e dey be o.

Na when e reach time to settle down,

You will realise girlfriend plenty, but wife scarce.

Men dey, na husband be problem.

You see the one wey fine, e no get sense.

The one wey get sense, she no get nyash...no sexual attraction.

The one wey get nyash, she too like instagram and snapchat. In fact, na undercover-slay queen.

The one wey get everything you want, she is in a relationship.


This life ehn...

Just a select few will be lucky to see every they want in one.

Last last, so many will have to compromise.

You see that your list and standard, you go dey reduce am small small.

u have a point dear is not easy even if one is despirate to get married if I rush marry ugly person or a girl DAT is an illitrate dont u think it will lead to regret later in life. I still think u can still get DAT perfect person just shine ur eyes and be serious.know wat u want in a woman or man and be prayerful. if I see a girl I love DAT is not married but got a boyfriwnd and I like her I tried to snatch her.if she aint got a ring shes still single as far as am concerned

bluskyee:
bro where are you from, I like this guy already. You see the one with everything she is already taken....who them come leave the remaining for?

She's a feminist

bluskyee:
At the inception of 2018 I thought my pre wedding photos will be on the front page of NL (with a new moniker )but it seems I am a bit mistaken. Looking forward to meeting a partner is turning to a full time job ( or maybe is not, perhaps I am over thinking or ... ) I am thinking perhaps my transfer is the main cause but I am 2years here already. I know say I done cast well but is just funny, really funny. I am not looking for advice pls, I am only thinking out loud with the aid of Budweiser, hoping to read this when I start thinking again. At least I won't have to think again.

If you happen to be in this category you can share your thought ( guys only)

guy just be patient d time will come.see don jazzy with all his money is not married.when dbanj marry? 2017 and 18 I was so depress and insult I get from family and friends.I even think of pregnanting a girl like if no wife at least I have a son. but I just realise life is more Dan DAT. I know am doing d right things so marriage will come when it will come.don't lkill ur self over nothing. my personal happiness over marriage anytime.

calgaryFriend:
I can relate with you OP. For me I am outside of the country and I already made up my mind not to marry from outside the country. I have been meeting people online but after relating with them for sometime I realise the extent of how ignorant, materialistic and focus-less most ladies are.

I was following up with a lady last week, then I saw her whatsap status - ENU GBE, E FUN MI LOWO ENU GBG (i am broke, please give me money I am broke). What kind of human being comes on social media to write such trash ? People dont even have respect for themselves or their families.

WheN i WAS in school I was placed on minimum wage and I tried to live within my means how can people just begin to behave like peasants, so that pissed me off and I just cancelled that babe.

The next one was even a little promising but on 2 occasions I was speaking to her and she was speaking to other people, imagine chatting someone and they admit they are also chatting up to 7 people at the same time.

Then I rebuked the person and the next few days we are talking on phone and the person is typing and after I asked what was going on she said she was chatting with people while speaking with me on whatsap call, I did not even react, but I just cancelled her in my mind.

It is quite tough really, the quality of women out there is really very low, we just have a few who are young and have proper sense.

Goodluck as we continue to search...

what happened to the nigerian ladies in canada or the other ladies there? sorry oo i am not trying to pour san san in garri of any homebase babe dat u might be dating but if i will be honest with u i will let u know dat many of the homebased ladies involved in long distance relationships with abroad based dudes are actively involved in relationships with other guys or guy in nigeria.it might be understandable if u had a serious girlfriend b4 u travelled out but that u had no girlfriend or female friend b4 travelling out and its now u searching for homebase by using facebook or instagram ol boy u opening urself for scam.nigeria is not as it used to be before.deceit and scam every wia.just get a nigerian girl who is in canada there with u since its a naija girl u want and save urself lots of stress.

Iogobenz:
I never said marry a foreign woman!
I said Nigerian women in the West who know what they are doing.
I will never marry a foreign woman too!
There are lots of single nigerian women out there especially in calgary.i know because my sister is there too.
But I agree with your whole old age talk because before the average Nigerian woman will fix her immigration status,finish school and get a job,she probably must have hit 30.
You've just got to compromise on that one.afterall age is nothing but a number right?
Or do you want to come home and puck one of them leeches?
Or the ones that have managed to gather not much but start acting all high and mighty?
Anyways,your choice.
I wish you the best bro.

Age is a big factor for me. By the time a woman hits menopause some at 40 - 45 years old, a man is just starting. Imagine at 50years you cannot have satisfying se.x life. I am not saying it is the same for everybody but by design a man is still good to go at 65 years, if your wife is 65 years you would have to give up on se.x totally .
And because women age quite faster compared to men so marrying a woman over 30 years is a no no for me.

calgaryFriend:


I did not cancel her out immidiately, I spoke to her gently and let her know it is disrespectful to the other person. I have asked her out and I have even gone as far as letting her know I really would love to start a serious relationship with her, the fact she still continued after I let her know I dont like that shows 2 things.

1. She does not understand the word respect. My time is also precious and I have many people to chat but I show respect to her by not chattin g multiple people at the same time. HOW can you be discussing with someone about how you guys want your future to look like and she is typing away while still on the call ? You may justify of trivialise that but it is a red flag. Mutual respect is important in any relationship.

2. She may have another relationship or several other relationships.

you are right on this bro, i 100% agree with you.

Iogobenz:
I never said marry a foreign woman!
I said Nigerian women in the West who know what they are doing.
I will never marry a foreign woman too!
There are lots of single nigerian women out there especially in calgary.i know because my sister is there too.
But I agree with your whole old age talk because before the average Nigerian woman will fix her immigration status,finish school and get a job,she probably must have hit 30.
You've just got to compromise on that one.afterall age is nothing but a number right?
Or do you want to come home and puck one of them leeches?
Or the ones that have managed to gather not much but start acting all high and mighty?
Anyways,your choice.
I wish you the best bro.

sometimes i dey feel sorry for some of d abroad base guys when i see d way some homebase babes dey take scam dem. money wey d abroad guy go dey send to her she go dey use d money plan wedding with d main guy for naija wey she like.in many cases dem dey use dese abroad guys as dollar or euro ATM.what makes dem run away from nigerian ladies based overseas with them? as for age i have seen 30 something yr old ladies who look younger than some 20 something yr old girls.na how a woman take care of her body dey determine how she go look not her age.

calgaryFriend:
I can relate with you OP. For me I am outside of the country and I already made up my mind not to marry from outside the country. I have been meeting people online but after relating with them for sometime I realise the extent of how ignorant, materialistic and focus-less most ladies are.

I was following up with a lady last week, then I saw her whatsap status - ENU GBE, E FUN MI LOWO ENU GBG (i am broke, please give me money I am broke). What kind of human being comes on social media to write such trash ? People dont even have respect for themselves or their families.

WheN i WAS in school I was placed on minimum wage and I tried to live within my means how can people just begin to behave like peasants, so that pissed me off and I just cancelled that babe.

The next one was even a little promising but on 2 occasions I was speaking to her and she was speaking to other people, imagine chatting someone and they admit they are also chatting up to 7 people at the same time.

Then I rebuked the person and the next few days we are talking on phone and the person is typing and after I asked what was going on she said she was chatting with people while speaking with me on whatsap call, I did not even react, but I just cancelled her in my mind.

It is quite tough really, the quality of women out there is really very low, we just have a few who are young and have proper sense.

Goodluck as we continue to search...

You can't possibly be the only she would chat with when messages keep dropping while she is online na... Relax don't be tough

jessysparkles:

You can't possibly be the only she would chat with when messages keep dropping while she is online na... Relax don't be tough

I get your point, and it did not happen once but severally.
Lastly, I am not supposed to just a friend, this is someone we have started discussing future plans just that she has not officially said "Yes" .

My hour is worth 100times what her own hour is currently worth if you want to classify it by pay rate, and I am older than her far older but I still show respect to her by giving her all the attention at that time.

So for these reasons it shows she lacks respect or does still not understand what commitment means.

There are somethings that are basic and if a lady does not have them no need to start training a lady at 23years .

Just move on. There are some things parents, education and exposure should teach one.

Once I complained about it the first time she is not supposed to still continue.

Corndoning that will mean I will condone any other thing.

calgaryFriend:


I did not cancel her out immidiately, I spoke to her gently and let her know it is disrespectful to the other person. I have asked her out and I have even gone as far as letting her know I really would love to start a serious relationship with her, the fact she still continued after I let her know I dont like that shows 2 things.

1. She does not understand the word respect. My time is also precious and I have many people to chat but I show respect to her by not chattin g multiple people at the same time. HOW can you be discussing with someone about how you guys want your future to look like and she is typing away while still on the call ? You may justify of trivialise that but it is a red flag. Mutual respect is important in any relationship.

2. She may have another relationship or several other relationships.

I understand those things, you maybe right... I wish you good luck in your search for a partner.

sarutobi:


no, You got it wrong.

Infact, it is rude to talk to someone else when you are already in an active conversation.

These are subtle signs people ignore and then start to complain after marriage.

Yes, I understand that it is rude, but you can gently chastise and try to correct the offending person because some people genuinely do not know it is wrong. When they refuse to be corrected after several attempts then you can ex them. I have always believed in second, and even third chances.

The search is can be overwhelming mehn...

God would help us

calgaryFriend:
I can relate with you OP. For me I am outside of the country and I already made up my mind not to marry from outside the country. I have been meeting people online but after relating with them for sometime I realise the extent of how ignorant, materialistic and focus-less most ladies are.

I was following up with a lady last week, then I saw her whatsap status - ENU GBE, E FUN MI LOWO ENU GBG (i am broke, please give me money I am broke). What kind of human being comes on social media to write such trash ? People dont even have respect for themselves or their families.

WheN i WAS in school I was placed on minimum wage and I tried to live within my means how can people just begin to behave like peasants, so that pissed me off and I just cancelled that babe.

The next one was even a little promising but on 2 occasions I was speaking to her and she was speaking to other people, imagine chatting someone and they admit they are also chatting up to 7 people at the same time.

Then I rebuked the person and the next few days we are talking on phone and the person is typing and after I asked what was going on she said she was chatting with people while speaking with me on whatsap call, I did not even react, but I just cancelled her in my mind.

It is quite tough really, the quality of women out there is really very low, we just have a few who are young and have proper sense.

Goodluck as we continue to search...

A perfectionist? Learn to give room for mistakes and adjustment. Things mustn't go your way or how you planned it most times. Relationships doesn't have set rules and regulations, just go with the flow!!

Finding a life partner can be so tasking. I pray we don't make mistakes

that was how i was doing anyhow when i was with my girl few months back at a point i even dey bring woman for house and she caught me one day and dealt with the girl before i go come back my house don turn upside down.

I entered my house see wethn she did to my guest and she don put hot water for fire oo wethn she wan do wih hot water me i dont know

omo i use vex beat her blue black chase her comot tell her im not doing again...via we are doing relationship and u are mad like this if we come marry that means u will kill person. na so relationship take end and we were close to settling down oo..

I started leaving my life enjoying girls the way i wish. name it 3some, watching lesbians make out and inviting girls to twerk for me/house party.


After like 7months i never still get gf ooo much more of settling down..
I started thinking abt my life... i started asking my sef if na like this i go dey live my life and again as per only child too much pressure is on me to marry.. chei....

Na so i begin reson some of my friends that e be like i will go back to my girl oo..
long story short i went back and she accepted me. i swore never to hurt her again
should be seeing her parents soon.

My people wife no too dey like girlfirends o o o o o o
if your woman dey give u peace of mind hold her tight...

Op i pray u meet her soon.. goodluck

0KNM:

Hahaha this is so funny lol. But can she not complain if she’s thirsty?

as in eh so funny

bluskyee:
lols she was angry I decided not to meet the lady, I don't think she will be that nice ...

hear yourself na ''i dont think'' you didnt even give it a try are you a judge

Damn. There really are people!

This is why I intend to start a serious relationship now that am young and jobless. Because as soon as I get a nice paying job, I intend to marry, as ""flexing"" has never been my kind of lifestyle.

But the discouragement I get from guys about my broke status coupled with the kind of lifestyle girls within the age bracket I want live, I begin to wonder if I will ever get ""LUCKY", cos marriage is about luck for me.

Parents of female children are also not doing enough as they don't give their daughters orientation about raising a family. A twenty years old girl for example is not ready to commit, she still wants to explore. What are you exploring?

May God help us and give us our spec of life partner.

AntiBrutus:
Naso e dey be o.

Na when e reach time to settle down,

You will realise girlfriend plenty, but wife scarce.

Men dey, na husband be problem.

You see the one wey fine, e no get sense.

The one wey get sense, she no get nyash...no sexual attraction.

The one wey get nyash, she too like instagram and snapchat. In fact, na undercover-slay queen.

The one wey get everything you want, she is in a relationship.


This life ehn...

Just a select few will be lucky to see every they want in one.

Last last, so many will have to compromise.

You see that your list and standard, you go dey reduce am small small.

Another brilliant take, Pocha.

calgaryFriend:
I can relate with you OP. For me I am outside of the country and I already made up my mind not to marry from outside the country. I have been meeting people online but after relating with them for sometime I realise the extent of how ignorant, materialistic and focus-less most ladies are.

It is quite tough really, the quality of women out there is really very low, we just have a few who are young and have proper sense.

Goodluck as we continue to search...

Did you attend the Igbo Cultural day that held last month in Calgary? Trust me, not only Igbos graced the occasion - it's usually a mixed group because Nigerian ladies in diaspora also share similar sentiments and are looking to connect with their Naija brothers too.

I'd advise you also look to the East African (Tanzania gets my top recommendation) and West African (Ghana gets my top recommendation) communities in your locality. Unless you are stuck on a particular tribe, our cultures are quite similar. Forget the vertical lines drawn by colonialists.

You need to also prayerfully approach a decision as crucial as marriage.

Patience is key.

Ighoga898:
The reason you are finding it difficult is because

Boys fvck who they can
Girls fvck who they want
But boys marry who they want
Girls marry who they can

Finding who we want is hard that's why boys detest marriage

Finding who we can is easy that's why girls like marriage

Sense will not kill me

pass me whatever that is giving you this inspiration. I need to partake in it abeg