I Need The Advice Of Experienced Married Men

NB: This is not my real account, I created this account for the purpose of this issue.

Please, I need the advice of married people (especially married men). I will make the story as simple as possible and I promise not to compromise the truth to favour me in this issue.

Brief Introduction: I am a man in my late 20's. Got married last year and currently have a 3month baby.

Brief history of my relationship prior to marriage: I dated my wife for 4years before we finally tied the knot last year. I met her in the university, we were classmate in school.

Before I started dating my wife, I was dating a girl in the same class but we both agreed to separate after 1year because we were age mate and she was keen on getting married immediately after graduation which I knew I will not be ready for marriage by then (Note: No sex in the relationship, She was a virgin and because I couldn't assure her of marriage, I didn't sex her).

After the break up with my ex, I became close to my wife and we started dating. She was self sufficient as she had a source of income while in school, she supports me, gives me money, cooks and buy me food etc. She was the best woman any man can think of. I fell in love along the line and decided this is the right lady to marry.

Note: There were several backlashes from other classmates insinuating she snatched me from my ex but we scaled through all that. We dated for 2more years in school and we graduated. We dated for another 2more years post school till last year.

Brief history immediately before marriage: Everything was fine till my wife's birthday last year. I did tripple shifts at work(48hrs work non-stop) and came back a night before her birthday and slept off. I woke up 2:30am to wish her happy birthday. She got angry and told me I didnt put her in mind and that I was not the first person to wish her happy birthday (She later told me her ex wished her first at exactly 12am). I apologised to her and told her the reason I missed the time. I had just 10k, gave her 5k to do a birthday photoshoot, used about 3k to buy her goodies as salary has not been paid.

Fast forward to after 1week of the birthday, she came up with serious issue, saying she wanted a break but not total break-up for some months to put herself together. She lamented she was not getting anything from the relationship, I don't usually take her out, I didnt celebrate her birthday well for her, I didnt buy cake, I didnt buy gift etc. I apologised and pleaded with her to be patient as we had big projects before us (wedding, masters degree and family apartment) which she knew I was saving for. We settled it and had sex. After 7days, I saw a call log on her phone where she had a conversation with her ex for almost an hour between 11pm and 12am. After 1month, she missed her menses and was pregnant. I asked her if she ever saw her ex, she cried and swore that she didn't (Note: I trusted her because she is modest and she is not the sex type). So, I agreed, accepted the preg, quickly arranged an impromptu wedding, I quickly sourced for money, spent over N2million on the wedding......

THE PROBLEM:

2weeks after the weeding, my wife started abusing my family especially my mum, telling me she hated how my family behaved during the wedding. I pleaded with her not to allow this to affect our home. The insults and abuse became perpetual. My wife works from home and will give me several reasons why she cannot cook after giving her money for food stuffs once I collect salary. Its just 2 of us living in a mini flat & I wash my clothes myself, but she will give me thousands of reasons how the non-existent house shores prevent her from cooking.

After 9months, she gave birth, I asked her who she wanted to come do omugo with the baby between her mum and my mum. She opted for my mum (claimed her mum will be giving her problem). Not up to 1week that my mum came over, she has started complaining about everything she does. Despite the fact that this woman will wake up 5am, wash everybody's clothes, bath the baby but she doesnt cook. My wife started complaining about her being obligated to cook every morning because of my mum's presence(Note: she doesnt cook in the morning, if I am going to work by 8am, I will either warm a left over previous night's food or source for food outside). When the complain was becoming overwhelming to the point of her almost insulting my mum in my presence, I told her I will tell my mum to go back to her house( my mum lives in a mini flat too with my dad, so they are very comfortable). She said I shouldn't. After 1 month, my mum left. The abuse, insults and complain continued. She will nag about how my mum did when she was with us, abuse and insults my family. I will appeal to her and defend my family. My wife became complete opposite of who she was when we were dating.

The real issue at hand: We would be migrating to the US soon. Lately, I can't control my wife, anytime I don't buy her idea or wish, she will rain insults on me. Just 3days ago, she told me I don't have sense repeatedly just because she said we should go and greet her mum's pastor which I told her not now but we can go later. If I tell her to do something, she will do otherwise and give me thousand of reasons she can't do it. 2months ago, I reported all her attitudes to her mum, her mum talked to her but no change, she is getting worse. Last week, I did 24hours at work, I got home, my wife didn't cook. I got into the kitchen, made custard and placed the soup on the gas cooker. We were both in the living room. She perceived the soup was getting burnt and insulted me, telling me it was because I was not the one that dropped money for the soup, thats why I wanted to burn it (She cooked the soup with her money because my salary was delayed). She insults me at will, gives me no respect and treat me as trash.(Note: I had never cheated on her and she doesn't doubt my fidelity. Likewise, I had never suspected her of such too).

I am currently scared because I know US is women's world because I have included her and the kid as my dependents in my green card petition. I am scared for my life and career because she could go worse in the US and destroy all I have laboured for.

Please kindly advise me on what I can do to change her.

Sorry for the long write up and any grammatical errors.

The first thing I would advice you to do is to go and have a DNA test for that child, with what you explained here I don't trust that your wife, she is a big time pretender and pretenders are capacable of commiting dangerous sins.

The love between you two had quenched for a long time but you refused to see it, it all started from that her birthday, she felt you really didn't take her as your most important thing in life, I think that is when she started getting closer to her ex, I suspect that your wife and ex still had a short time relationship before getting married to you, she did that because she realise her ex was not ready for marriage and she was pregnant, so she decided to get married to you.

You can both go to see a counselor and let him know where you guys are lacking in your marriage, maybe you are not doing something right that is infuriating your wife but just hope she still has any iota of love for you, if not the marriage is as good as dead.

This is really pathetic, i can feel your pains, believe me i seriously do.

If I understood you Anonymus010, you said you never had sex with the first girl you dated because she was a virgin and you didn't want to assure her of marriage: VERDICT==> You are a nice guy with self control. You aren't like a great majority who insert their rod into any available hole.

You equally said that your wife's ex wished her a happy birthday before you and and ever since, her attitude towards you changed: VERDICT==> I can tell you that the said birthday is the genesis of your problems. Okafor's law comes into play. I almost had sex with my ex, though she is married but we still have affections for each other. She once visited me and during our conservations, one thing led to another thing (you know as matter dey be?) we started kissing and almost had sex. If not for the fact that i summoned courage to kill the urge, i would have had sex with another man's wife. THE SAD TRUTH IS THAT YOUR WIFE STILL MEETS HER EX SEXUALLY, i know you trust her but that is the truth. What if i tell you that the new born baby isn't yours? i suggest you run a DNA test to ascertain the paternity of the baby.

You equally said that she disrespects your family, she insults your mother and doesn't accord you even an atom of respect. VERDICT: ==> You should up your game .Understand that you are the man of the house, Warn her to desist from insulting your family. The Igbos say that "arusi nile nwere onye na ago ya" Every oracle has a chief priest and whom it listens to, so I advise you to find that person whom your wife listens to, and table your case before him or her. I believe the person will definitely talk some senses into her.

Your wife is very determined to bring you down and i am afraid to tell you that peace might be a stranger to you until the matter is resolved. VERDICT: ==> DON'T TAKE HER TO THE STATES atleast for now, else you are a "goner". Her heart still beats for her ex, take her for counselling both spiritual and psychological and above all take your case to God in prayer. I wish you the best!

Na wa oh! Me no carry her go any US oh.

you better act fast before she distroy ur life. divorce her asap.

single guy like me gat no advice now...wait till d married men storm d page.

Go for counseling or find someone she respects and talk to them. There is something wrong somewhere. People do not just change. Someone somewhere is fuelling this. Maybe her friends or dunno. Calm down and find the problem then fix it. A broken home is not a good thing.

While you were busy running a marathon shift at work, your wife had been obviously busy with her ex, and this is where the "see finish" started from.

In your best interest, you had better jettisoned the US idea with her if not, na OYO be your name.

DNA, please

Some guys still don't understand that most women detest softie men to no end.

Toughen up some bro, that woman has tried and seen to what extent she can trample on you without any repercussions.

Be strong mate

Just forget about the marriage once she lands in the US. If she cannot change here, she will get worse over there. Be convinced she is the wife you want in a woman before migrating. All the best

Woman insult your family in your presence you no jam am till she collapse
Bros you dey fall hand o
Please no one should advise this kind of weak man.spits!
Who wouldn't know what to do at this point?some people dey born sha
Just look at someone's son.e be like na pap den use raise you.
Your mom comes to your own house and your wife not only mistreated her but tried to insult her in your presence?you know why?she knows you are a weak man.
That was your golden opportunity to teach her a bitter lesson that will be justified anywhere in Nigeria.
I wonder what she will do to you if you take her to the US.
Better cancel all plans of that visa,withdraw the application,divorce that woman whether the child is yours or Not,do not care!just be sending upkeep money for the child and get yourself another woman.
Jesus Christ!

I'm here to read comment

well i'm not married, but from what you typed,it seems she has given you clue of what you are doing to her,which is prompting her to act that way...that's the issue of not giving her enough attention, care and love...some ladies might be so funny and crazy when you tend to deny them some things..she knew she is married now and since she can't cheat on you,due to conscience or whatever. she expected you to be giving her all she needs,irrespective of your busy schedule... why not deal with that first by planning your time with her,then see if she will change... I believe she can be easily manipulated by you,since she is not giving you a silent and cold treatment.... her constant nagging shows she needs you to amend immediately... women can be so funny...
note:I'm currently in such with my fiancee presently.. due to my NYSC posting we have been on this LDR thing for now,and I have not really had time for her like before..we hardly see,and she complains,nags at my little mistakes.but when I started shifting my attention back to her,her head is calming back a bit....



just be calm and amend...she is your wife now and not a fiancee or girlfriend...

well I didn't read your story

but the comments here says you're foolish


I believe those comments

I will reply shortly. It's gonna be lengthy.

I don't pity some of you when you end up with bad wives. This your wife is everything bad. No character, no home training, no respect for elders, and you want to say you didn't notice any of these while dating even if she's the best pretender in town.

Marriage is for better, for worse. Carry your cross.

The need for attention or whatever doesn't give anyone the right to insult parents. I can't even imagine the kind of person she is...she even declined her own mum for omugwo... otherwise, i'd have said she's badly trained. N so petty, complaining that he burnt the soup cos he didn't bring money for soup.


@ op - una don see am. Pretenders apparently do the worst. Marry someone that's real with u, una no go hear. Miss goody two shoes is now trampling on u. Pele

sholikay:
well i'm not married, but from what you typed,it seems she has given you clue of what you are doing to her,which is prompting her to act that way...that's the issue of not giving her enough attention, care and love...some ladies might be so funny and crazy when you tend to deny them some things..she knew she is married now and since she can't cheat on you,due to conscience or whatever. she expected you to be giving her all she needs,irrespective of your busy schedule... why not deal with that first by planning your time with her,then see if she will change... I believe she can be easily manipulated by you,since she is not giving you a silent and cold treatment.... her constant nagging shows she needs you to amend immediately... women can be so funny...
note:I'm currently in such with my fiancee presently.. due to my NYSC posting we have been on this LDR thing for now,and I have not really had time for her like before..we hardly see,and she complains,nags at my little mistakes.but when I started shifting my attention back to her,her head is calming back a bit....



just be calm and amend...she is your wife now and not a fiancee or girlfriend...

nickyvil:
Languages:
English: Fool
Yoruba: Ode
Igbo: Onye Nzuzu
Hausa: Wawa
Spanish: Tonto
French: Idiot

Please choose one u understand cos that what qualifies u.

No, the only fool here is YOU.

And you're a big one at that.

WTF LMAO

Totally speechless.

Did it ever occur to you that your wife might be suffering from Pre/Postpartum psychosis.

No perfect marriage, you've known your wife before now, learn to deal with your differences and keep your lives off social media

Because her abuse/anger/insults began two weeks after the wedding and she's still communicating w| her ex, she might still be in love w| him. Comparing you to her ex who wished her a hbd at 12am is silly. This is why people shouldn't be communicating with exes after marriage.

If she's now the "complete opposite of who she was when [you] were dating", as you've said, another possibility is that her niceness before the wedding was simply pretence. It's baffling that someone would do a quick 360 like this after a wedding and start misbehaving.

I feel bad for your mom b|c the way she was treated wasn't nice. Abusing your mom/family when she came for the omugwo and even after she left is a no-no.

Go for counselling together. Good luck.

Cc: Ornicus.

OP, said experienced married men o.

Kingosytex:
Dis is really pathetic, i can feel ur pains, believe me i seriously do.

If I understood u Anonymus010, u said you never had sex with the first girl u dated because she was a virgin and u didn't want to assure her of marriage: VERDICT==> U are a nice guy with self control. U aren't like a great majority who insert their rod into any available hole.

You equally said that her ex wished her a happy birthday b4 u: VERDICT==> Okafor's law comes into play. i almost had sex with my ex, though she is married but we still have affections for each other. What if i tell you that the new born baby isn't yours? i suggest you run a DNA test to ascertain the paternity of the baby

She is very determined 2 bring u down and i am afraid to tell u dat peace might be a stranger to u until d matter is resolved. DON'T TAKE HER TO THE STATES atleast 4 now, else u are a "goner". Her heart still beats for her ex, take her for counselling both spiritual and psychological and above all take your case to God in prayer

This sums up all you need to know and do.................it will help you in looking before you leap, since the first leap (marriage) is now a night mare and please listen carefully no go carry that woman go U.S if all stated according to you is true cause no be for that country person they learn how to control wife.
P.S I noticed you amongst the few that reasons too much before you act, sometimes and most times it comes as a blessing but abeg try not to allow anyone insult your mother, you for drawline that moment.

catwalq:
Did it ever occur to you that your wife might be suffering from Pre/Postpartum psychosis.

Did you read were he said she started insulting him and his family after 2 weeks of marriage

your wife is CLEARLY still attached to her ex. she is just managing you all that is keeping her in check is our societal norms
you are right not to want to go to the US with her.
[i know of a couple who emigrated to the US on the madam's dime and the husband then came out of the closet]

Everything was fine till my wife's birthday last year. I did tripple shifts at work(48hrs work non-stop) and came back a night before her birthday and slept off. I woke up 2:30am to wish her happy birthday. She got angry and told me I didnt put her in mind and that I was not the first person to wish her happy birthday (She later told me her ex wished her first at exactly 12am). I apologised to her and told her the reason I missed the time.

why is an ex calling her at 12 am? why is she comparing you to her ex?

I had just 10k, gave her 5k to do a birthday photoshoot, used about 3k to buy her goodies as salary has not been paid. Fast forward to after 1week of the birthday, she came up with serious issue, saying she wanted a break but not total break-up for some months to put herself together. She lamented she was not getting anything from the relationship, I don't usually take her out, I didnt celebrate her birthday well for her, I didnt buy cake, I didnt buy gift etc. I apologised and pleaded with her to be patient as we had big projects before us (wedding, masters degree and family apartment) which she knew I was saving for. We settled it and had sex

.

you people are dating seriously. the time for money for fun should be on hold, and both of you need to understand that. it is more comparison to her ex, who is shelling out money.

After 7days, I saw a call log on her phone where she had a conversation with her ex for almost an hour between 11pm and 12am. After 1month, she missed her menses and was pregnant. I asked her if she ever saw her ex, she cried and swore that she didn't (Note: I trusted her because she is modest and she is not the sex type).

most women ARE the sex type - once they are attracted to you. if she is not the sex type, it means that for some reason, she considers sex with you a chore/obligation, rather than fun


[quote]2weeks after the weeding, my wife started abusing my family especially my mum, telling me she hated how my family behaved during the wedding. I pleaded with her not to allow this to affect our home. The insults and abuse became perpetual. My wife works from home and will give me several reasons why she cannot cook after giving her money for food stuffs once I collect salary. Its just 2 of us living in a mini flat & I wash my clothes myself, but she will give me thousands of reasons how the non-existent house shores prevent her from cooking. After 9months, she gave birth, I asked her who she wanted to come do omugo with the baby between her mum and my mum. She opted for my mum (claimed her mum will be giving her problem).

very simply, there is no love [from her] she is still in love with her ex, and unwilling to let go. your best bet is what others have suggested - do a dna test for the child. if you're lucky, it will not be yours and you can have a clean break.if it is your child, then you are in trouble, as i cannot see a good long term marriage between you and your wife and there is a child involved.

do not make the mistake of going to obodo oyibo with her. she will just set you up and you will be paying child support while she carries her ex with your money.

MamaEEE:




Did you read were he said she started insulting him and his family after 2 weeks of marriage

She was already pregnant. Some people start showing signs of baby blues during pregnancy.

Then again,it could just be that she was pretending all along.

I will keep preaching that every man must #MGTOW.

Most Nigerian women just like OP's wife have the following characteristics:

1. She doesn't work - she's being housed for free by a beta simp husband (who also pays all the Bills + her personal expenses).

2. She can cook but refuses to because of a false sense of "liberation" fuelled by modern day feminism.

3. She cannot do chores and will probably hire househelp even though they live in a rented flat

4. She brings absolutely nothing to the table.

5. Has a culture of "give me" she will demand your time, money and attention. She will not only take away your finances but your self-worth too and gives nothing in return.

6. Full of insults. No manners at all. Can insult your entire lineage at will yet you cannot fight back without being labelled an abusive husband.

7. Will cheat on you (especially if y'all reside in Nigeria).

I thank God for YouTube channels like CoachGregAdams who are unrelentlessy speaking up for us brothers. Men have been shamed and abused to the point of emasculation.

Lastly,

OP are you sure you're the father of that child?

Anonymus010:
NB: This is not my real account, I created this account for the purpose of this issue.
Please, I need the advice of married people (especially married men). I will make the story as simple as possible and I promise not to compromise the truth to favour me in this issue.
Brief Introduction: I am a man in my late 20's. Got married last year and currently have a 3month baby.
Brief history of my relationship prior to marriage: I dated my wife for 4years before we finally tied the knot last year. I met her in the university, we were classmate in school. Before I started dating my wife, I was dating a girl in the same class but we both agreed to separate after 1year because we were age mate and she was keen on getting married immediately after graduation which I knew I will not be ready for marriage by then (Note: No sex in the relationship, She was a virgin and because I couldn't assure her of marriage, I didn't sex her). After the break up with my ex, I became close to my wife and we started dating. She was self sufficient as she had a source of income while in school, she supports me, gives me money, cooks and buy me food etc. She was the best woman any man can think of. I fell in love along the line and decided this is the right lady to marry. Note: There were several backlashes from other classmates insinuating she snatched me from my ex but we scaled through all that. We dated for 2more years in school and we graduated. We dated for another 2more years post school till last year.
Brief history immediately before marriage: Everything was fine till my wife's birthday last year. I did tripple shifts at work(48hrs work non-stop) and came back a night before her birthday and slept off. I woke up 2:30am to wish her happy birthday. She got angry and told me I didnt put her in mind and that I was not the first person to wish her happy birthday (She later told me her ex wished her first at exactly 12am). I apologised to her and told her the reason I missed the time. I had just 10k, gave her 5k to do a birthday photoshoot, used about 3k to buy her goodies as salary has not been paid. Fast forward to after 1week of the birthday, she came up with serious issue, saying she wanted a break but not total break-up for some months to put herself together. She lamented she was not getting anything from the relationship, I don't usually take her out, I didnt celebrate her birthday well for her, I didnt buy cake, I didnt buy gift etc. I apologised and pleaded with her to be patient as we had big projects before us (wedding, masters degree and family apartment) which she knew I was saving for. We settled it and had sex. After 7days, I saw a call log on her phone where she had a conversation with her ex for almost an hour between 11pm and 12am. After 1month, she missed her menses and was pregnant. I asked her if she ever saw her ex, she cried and swore that she didn't (Note: I trusted her because she is modest and she is not the sex type). So, I agreed, accepted the preg, quickly arranged an impromptu wedding, I quickly sourced for money, spent over N2million on the wedding......
THE PROBLEM:
2weeks after the weeding, my wife started abusing my family especially my mum, telling me she hated how my family behaved during the wedding. I pleaded with her not to allow this to affect our home. The insults and abuse became perpetual. My wife works from home and will give me several reasons why she cannot cook after giving her money for food stuffs once I collect salary. Its just 2 of us living in a mini flat & I wash my clothes myself, but she will give me thousands of reasons how the non-existent house shores prevent her from cooking. After 9months, she gave birth, I asked her who she wanted to come do omugo with the baby between her mum and my mum. She opted for my mum (claimed her mum will be giving her problem). Not up to 1week that my mum came over, she has started complaining about everything she does. Despite the fact that this woman will wake up 5am, wash everybody's clothes, bath the baby but she doesnt cook. My wife started complaining about her being obligated to cook every morning because of my mum's presence(Note: she doesnt cook in the morning, if I am going to work by 8am, I will either warm a left over previous night's food or source for food outside). When the complain was becoming overwhelming to the point of her almost insulting my mum in my presence, I told her I will tell my mum to go back to her house( my mum lives in a mini flat too with my dad, so they are very comfortable). She said I shouldn't. After 1 month, my mum left. The abuse, insults and complain continued. She will nag about how my mum did when she was with us, abuse and insults my family. I will appeal to her and defend my family. My wife became complete opposite of who she was when we were dating.
The real issue at hand: We would be migrating to the US soon. Lately, I can't control my wife, anytime I don't buy her idea or wish, she will rain insults on me. Just 3days ago, she told me I don't have sense repeatedly just because she said we should go and greet her mum's pastor which I told her not now but we can go later. If I tell her to do something, she will do otherwise and give me thousand of reasons she can't do it. 2months ago, I reported all her attitudes to her mum, her mum talked to her but no change, she is getting worse. Last week, I did 24hours at work, I got home, my wife didn't cook. I got into the kitchen, made custard and placed the soup on the gas cooker. We were both in the living room. She perceived the soup was getting burnt and insulted me, telling me it was because I was not the one that dropped money for the soup, thats why I wanted to burn it (She cooked the soup with her money because my salary was delayed). She insults me at will, gives me no respect and treat me as trash.(Note: I had never cheated on her and she doesn't doubt my fidelity. Likewise, I had never suspected her of such too).
I am currently scared because I know US is women's world because I have included her and the kid as my dependents in my green card petition. I am scared for my life and career because she could go worse in the US and destroy all I have laboured for.
Please kindly advise me on what I can do to change her.
Sorry for the long write up and any grammatical errors.

Please most importantly, do a DNA test for the kid, it might not b urs, der is possibilities she catch some feelings from the birthday shoutout from her X... And 2ndly the country u wnt to migrate to with her, it takes only a good woman to remain her self wen dey cross borders, this one she can behave this way in Nigeria,over der she go use hand touch ground... Last last na prison u go dey.if u touch her, property and all il b hers .. U go lux everyttn at the end
In summary, do a DNA, watch her attitude if no changes mk d trip ur self first , giv her time to fix herself

Anonymus010:
NB: This is
2weeks after the weeding, my wife started abusing my family especially my mum, telling me she hated how my family behaved during the wedding. I pleaded with her not to allow this to affect our home. The insults and abuse became perpetual. My wife works from home and will give me several reasons why she cannot cook after giving her money for food stuffs once I collect salary. Its just 2 of us living in a mini flat & I wash my clothes myself, but she will give me thousands of reasons how the non-existent house shores prevent her from cooking.

Lately, I can't control my wife, anytime I don't buy her idea or wish, she will rain insults on me. Just 3days ago, she told me I don't have sense
.
Last week, I did 24hours at work, I got home, my wife didn't cook. I got into the kitchen, made custard and placed the soup on the gas cooker. We were both in the living room. She perceived the soup was getting burnt and insulted me, telling me it was because I was not the one that dropped money for the soup, thats why I wanted to burn it (She cooked the soup with her money because my salary was delayed).

She insults me at will, gives me no respect and treat me as trash.(Note: I had never cheated on her and she doesn't doubt my fidelity. Likewise, I had never suspected her of such too).

If this isn't abuse, I don't know what is...

Sorry dude. But if a b!tch tries this sh** with me, il knock her out. What rubbish!

Not condoning the knocking out bit at all, but this is cray like is it by force to greet a pastor for God's sake? What kind of rigorous religion are we tryna enforce in this country? Come n greet pastor...I no gree, then it turns to insult. Which one is more important to God - to greet pastor or to treat another human with respect.

genq:


Sorry dude. But if a b!tch tries this sh** with me, il knock her out. What rubbish!

Gloriagee:
Not condoning the knocking out bit at all, but this is cray like is it by force to greet a pastor for God's sake? What kind of rigorous religion are we tryna enforce in this country? Come n greet pastor...I no gree, then it turns to insult. Which one is more important to God - to greet pastor or to treat another human with respect.

Any woman who exhibits such characteristics as the OP's wife seizes to be lady and must be handled like the animal she is.

You guys wanna be equal right? Then you can equally get an ass whooping just like any other dude who tries to disrespect me. Miss me with that bullsh***.

OP has no dignity or self respect.