Briskroque:



Don’t be an alarmist

Sempumping:
APL isn't dropping Tomorrow
APL isn't dropping Tomorrow
APL isn't dropping Tomorrow
APL isn't dropping Tomorrow

Teaser4:
Lecture Title- THE TRUTH ABOUT BIG OIL AND CLIMATE CHANGE

In America, the world’s largest economy and its second biggest polluter, climate change is becoming hard to ignore. Extreme weather has grown more frequent. In November wildfires scorched California; last week Chicago was colder than parts of Mars.Scientists are sounding the alarm more urgently and people have noticed—73% of Americans polled by Yale University late last year said that climate change is real.

The left of the Democratic Party wants to put a “Green New Deal” at the heart of the election in 2020.
As expectations shift, the private sector is showing signs of adapting. Last year around 20 coal mines shut. Fund managers are prodding firms to become greener. Warren Buffett, no sucker for fads, is staking $30bn on clean energy and Elon Musk plans to fill America’s highways with electric cars.

Yet amid the clamour is a single, jarring truth. Demand for oil is rising and the energy industry, in America and globally, is planning multi-trillion-dollar investments to satisfy it. No firm embodies this strategy better than ExxonMobil, the giant that rivals admire and green activists love to hate. As our briefing explains, it plans to pump 25% more oil and gas in 2025 than in 2017. If the rest of the industry pursues even modest growth, the consequence for the climate could be disastrous.

ExxonMobil shows that the market cannot solve climate change by itself. Muscular government action is needed. Contrary to the fears of many Republicans (and hopes of some Democrats), that need not involve a bloated role for the state.

For much of the 20th century, the five oil majors—Chevron, ExxonMobil, Royal Dutch Shell, bp and Total—had more clout than some small countries. Although the majors’ power has waned, they still account for 10% of global oil and gas output and 16% of upstream investment. They set the tone for smaller, privately owned energy firms (which control another quarter of investment). And millions of pensioners and other savers rely on their profits. Of the 20 firms paying the biggest dividends in Europe and America, four are majors.

In 2000 bp promised to go “beyond petroleum” and, on the face of it, the majors have indeed changed. All say that they support the Paris agreement to limit climate change and all are investing in renewables such as solar. Shell recently said that it would curb emissions from its products. Yet ultimately you should judge companies by what they do, not what they say.

According to ExxonMobil, global oil and gas demand will rise by 13% by 2030. All of the majors, not just ExxonMobil, are expected to expand their output. Far from mothballing all their gasfields and gushers, the industry is investing in upstream projects from Texan shale to high-tech deep-water wells. Oil companies, directly and through trade groups, lobby against measures that would limit emissions. The trouble is that, according to an assessment by the ipcc, an intergovernmental climate-science body, oil and gas production needs to fall by about 20% by 2030 and by about 55% by 2050, in order to stop the Earth’s temperature rising by more than 1.5°C above its pre-industrial level.
It would be wrong to conclude that the energy firms must therefore be evil.

They are responding to incentives set by society. The financial returns from oil are higher than those from renewables. For now, worldwide demand for oil is growing by 1-2% a year, similar to the average over the past five decades—and the typical major derives a minority of its stockmarket value from profits it will make after 2030.

However much the majors are vilified by climate warriors, many of whom drive cars and take planes, it is not just legal for them to maximise profits, it is also a requirement that shareholders can enforce.

Some hope that the oil companies will gradually head in a new direction, but that looks optimistic. It would be rash to rely on brilliant innovations to save the day.
Global investment in renewables, at $300bn a year, is dwarfed by what is being committed to fossil fuels. Even in the car industry, where scores of electric models are being launched, around 85% of vehicles are still expected to use internal-combustion engines in 2030.

So, too, the boom in ethical investing. Funds with $32trn of assets have joined to put pressure on the world’s biggest emitters. Fund managers, facing a collapse in their traditional business, are glad to sell green products which, helpfully, come with higher fees. But few big investment groups have dumped the shares of big energy firms.

Despite much publicity, oil companies’ recent commitments to green investors remain modest. And do not expect much from the courts. Lawyers are bringing waves of actions accusing oil firms of everything from misleading the public to being liable for rising sea levels. Some think oil firms will suffer the same fate as tobacco firms, which faced huge settlements in the 1990s. They forget that big tobacco is still in business. In June a federal judge in California ruled that climate change was a matter for Congress and diplomacy, not judges.

The next 15 years will be critical for climate change. If innovators, investors, the courts and corporate self-interest cannot curb fossil fuels, then the burden must fall on the political system.

In 2017 America said it would withdraw from the Paris agreement and the Trump administration has tried to resurrect the coal industry. Even so, climate could yet enter the political mainstream and win cross-party appeal. Polls suggest that moderate and younger Republicans care. A recent pledge by dozens of prominent economists spanned the partisan divide.

The key will be to show centrist voters that cutting emissions is practical and will not leave them much worse off. Although the Democrats’ emerging Green New Deal raises awareness, it almost certainly fails this test as it is based on a massive expansion of government spending and central planning.

The best policy, in America and beyond, is to tax carbon emissions, which ExxonMobil backs. The
gilets jaunes in France show how hard that will be. Work will be needed on designing policies that can command popular support by giving the cash raised back to the public in the form of offsetting tax cuts. The fossil-fuel industry would get smaller, government would not get bigger and businesses would be free to adapt as they see fit—including, even, ExxonMobil.

PS: This isn't my handwriting. initially, I thought it was a joke or something lol..I have no idea what to write as I'm frying some personal beans rn, so I decided to share this beautiful article I read on "the Economist" sometimes ago. it's a lecture anyway it shouldn't be restricted to Nigeria alone. I hope y'all enjoy it too.

source: https://www. economist .com /leaders /2019/02/09/the-truth-about-big-oil-and-climate -change

Teaser4:
Lecture Title- THE TRUTH ABOUT BIG OIL AND CLIMATE CHANGE

In America, the world’s largest economy and its second biggest polluter, climate change is becoming hard to ignore. Extreme weather has grown more frequent. In November wildfires scorched California; last week Chicago was colder than parts of Mars.Scientists are sounding the alarm more urgently and people have noticed—73% of Americans polled by Yale University late last year said that climate change is real.

The left of the Democratic Party wants to put a “Green New Deal” at the heart of the election in 2020.
As expectations shift, the private sector is showing signs of adapting. Last year around 20 coal mines shut. Fund managers are prodding firms to become greener. Warren Buffett, no sucker for fads, is staking $30bn on clean energy and Elon Musk plans to fill America’s highways with electric cars.

Yet amid the clamour is a single, jarring truth. Demand for oil is rising and the energy industry, in America and globally, is planning multi-trillion-dollar investments to satisfy it. No firm embodies this strategy better than ExxonMobil, the giant that rivals admire and green activists love to hate. As our briefing explains, it plans to pump 25% more oil and gas in 2025 than in 2017. If the rest of the industry pursues even modest growth, the consequence for the climate could be disastrous.

ExxonMobil shows that the market cannot solve climate change by itself. Muscular government action is needed. Contrary to the fears of many Republicans (and hopes of some Democrats), that need not involve a bloated role for the state.

For much of the 20th century, the five oil majors—Chevron, ExxonMobil, Royal Dutch Shell, bp and Total—had more clout than some small countries. Although the majors’ power has waned, they still account for 10% of global oil and gas output and 16% of upstream investment. They set the tone for smaller, privately owned energy firms (which control another quarter of investment). And millions of pensioners and other savers rely on their profits. Of the 20 firms paying the biggest dividends in Europe and America, four are majors.

In 2000 bp promised to go “beyond petroleum” and, on the face of it, the majors have indeed changed. All say that they support the Paris agreement to limit climate change and all are investing in renewables such as solar. Shell recently said that it would curb emissions from its products. Yet ultimately you should judge companies by what they do, not what they say.

According to ExxonMobil, global oil and gas demand will rise by 13% by 2030. All of the majors, not just ExxonMobil, are expected to expand their output. Far from mothballing all their gasfields and gushers, the industry is investing in upstream projects from Texan shale to high-tech deep-water wells. Oil companies, directly and through trade groups, lobby against measures that would limit emissions. The trouble is that, according to an assessment by the ipcc, an intergovernmental climate-science body, oil and gas production needs to fall by about 20% by 2030 and by about 55% by 2050, in order to stop the Earth’s temperature rising by more than 1.5°C above its pre-industrial level.
It would be wrong to conclude that the energy firms must therefore be evil.

They are responding to incentives set by society. The financial returns from oil are higher than those from renewables. For now, worldwide demand for oil is growing by 1-2% a year, similar to the average over the past five decades—and the typical major derives a minority of its stockmarket value from profits it will make after 2030.

However much the majors are vilified by climate warriors, many of whom drive cars and take planes, it is not just legal for them to maximise profits, it is also a requirement that shareholders can enforce.

Some hope that the oil companies will gradually head in a new direction, but that looks optimistic. It would be rash to rely on brilliant innovations to save the day.
Global investment in renewables, at $300bn a year, is dwarfed by what is being committed to fossil fuels. Even in the car industry, where scores of electric models are being launched, around 85% of vehicles are still expected to use internal-combustion engines in 2030.

So, too, the boom in ethical investing. Funds with $32trn of assets have joined to put pressure on the world’s biggest emitters. Fund managers, facing a collapse in their traditional business, are glad to sell green products which, helpfully, come with higher fees. But few big investment groups have dumped the shares of big energy firms.

Despite much publicity, oil companies’ recent commitments to green investors remain modest. And do not expect much from the courts. Lawyers are bringing waves of actions accusing oil firms of everything from misleading the public to being liable for rising sea levels. Some think oil firms will suffer the same fate as tobacco firms, which faced huge settlements in the 1990s. They forget that big tobacco is still in business. In June a federal judge in California ruled that climate change was a matter for Congress and diplomacy, not judges.

The next 15 years will be critical for climate change. If innovators, investors, the courts and corporate self-interest cannot curb fossil fuels, then the burden must fall on the political system.

In 2017 America said it would withdraw from the Paris agreement and the Trump administration has tried to resurrect the coal industry. Even so, climate could yet enter the political mainstream and win cross-party appeal. Polls suggest that moderate and younger Republicans care. A recent pledge by dozens of prominent economists spanned the partisan divide.

The key will be to show centrist voters that cutting emissions is practical and will not leave them much worse off. Although the Democrats’ emerging Green New Deal raises awareness, it almost certainly fails this test as it is based on a massive expansion of government spending and central planning.

The best policy, in America and beyond, is to tax carbon emissions, which ExxonMobil backs. The
gilets jaunes in France show how hard that will be. Work will be needed on designing policies that can command popular support by giving the cash raised back to the public in the form of offsetting tax cuts. The fossil-fuel industry would get smaller, government would not get bigger and businesses would be free to adapt as they see fit—including, even, ExxonMobil.

PS: This isn't my handwriting. initially, I thought it was a joke or something lol..I have no idea what to write as I'm frying some personal beans rn, so I decided to share this beautiful article I read on "the Economist" sometimes ago. it's a lecture anyway it shouldn't be restricted to Nigeria alone. I hope y'all enjoy it too.

source: https://www. economist .com /leaders /2019/02/09/the-truth-about-big-oil-and-climate -change

Sempumping:
@ number5 ,Great write-up .I am a man by the way

07068455937Ta:
Yes it is correct that Apl will start rolling out immediately after Sallah from a reliable source.Mark my word!

NNPC GT PRESIDENT

number5:


Wow.. Awesome expository. Reminds me so much of my interview, when asked about CDM, the chairman gave me a sign to spew as much as i knew about the topic, i breathed forth and did my thing.. It ended in smiles, i hope so too for the time of release of APL..

Nice one, i been dey lookout to see dose ur deep pigin sha.. Lol.

Sempumping:
@ number5 ,Great write-up .I am a man by the way

mapman:
Bellissimo! Bravo! Thanks for introducing us to this insightful piece

But you for translate the article to Pidgin for local men and women sha

souljar:
This guy with signature "DYNAMIC ENTRY!!!" (someone remind me of his sobriquet!) and Vyke2008, y'all were with easymoneysniper on this 9/10 theory/sauce. Where are you guys when you're needed for corroboration?

LocalNietzsche:
I read about Climate change from NASA's website. I came up with more questions than answers sir.
1. Anybody with knowledge of meteorology knows that predicting climate over the short time is not an easy thing talk less of trends. Based on the factors mentioned by NASA's website I am not convinced?
2. I saw a graph with a spike in the CO2 levels in the 1950s, I am not an expert but that spike is not enough to explain a drastic climate change. Remember a single variable cannot shift climate. Everything is in balance
3. Increase in CO2 (CO2 even though greenhouse gas actually suffocates fires) will not cause more wild fires but a spike in vegetation growth. Increase concentration of Oxygen however is far more likely to account for more Forest fires.
4. The fact about melting glaciers and high snowfall in record numbers is more of a balance in my opinion than contradiction.
5. The tilt in the axis of our earth as it's orbits the sun is far much more of a risk than CO2 to our climate. So far that is not predictable. A methodology to predict that is of utmost importance.
6. Climate change hysteria and attribution of disasters to climate change reminds alot of superstitious belief where natural disasters are attributed to evil of mankind. It just feels that way to me.
7. I am stronger supporter of sustainability because of economics. That is, I believe that we have finite resources on Earth hence we should strive towards a model that utilize our scarce resources efficiently. The key for me is the free market system. It is best system we have developed as humans for the allocation of economic value in our lives.
8. The pursuit for technological development and better theories is among our keys for having a better relationship with our environment. The bottleneck for solar power and wind is battery power(Highly inefficient). This because they have variable outputs depending on natural causes. At the extreme of both the north and south hemisphere, solar is basically useless.
9. I still believe the key is in nuclear power. Developing nuclear power to be safer, smaller and acceptable might be the future.

number5:
Well, as the distinguished history keeper of this great association, it is my duty to present to us all in this grand event, the history of this thread and subsequently, that of the prestigious association of local men and women (AOLMAW) OF NNPC.

The thread was created by one of our very own @Dmainman on Wednesday, the 13th of march 2019 at exactly 2:39pm. It turned out that one of the most decorated government owned company had published an advert for vacancies in its various subsidiaries..

Till this very day, the number of persons who registered online for the recruitment is unknown, though some sources have stated something in the range of 800 thousand and/or above. Registration process was greatly marred by difficlties in uploading passports which made a good number of applicant to fall out of the race.

A month after the online registration closed, came the invite for a cbt test. It is rumoured among local men and women, that about 60000 persons wrote the cbt test all over the country in about 190 cbt test centers. The cbt test was considerably thought to be 'cheap' by a good number of local men and women while others felt it was a deliberate setup by the organizers as they were very aware of online platforms like this one that had dished out various test past questions with a lot of difficult samples. Yours faithfully, the distinguished historian wrote his cbt in one of the middle belt states, 7am and he was very excited as evident to the cordinators. He had looked forward to this for "years".

Invite for interview came less than a month after the cbt exams were conducted. It came with mixed feelings as joy sparkled the air for those who had received while those who did not receive, broke down amidst tears.
It is worthy to note that this period was crucial to the formation of the prestigious association of local men and women as it brought pioneers of the association into limelight, notable amongst these great men and women are:

Sir jarus, mosgoon, enireqx, teaser4, beeam, bobowaje, chasteguy, macgyver1, gbyms, csrockefeller, gbriels, mathology, sempumpingson woman, danxplore, mosphy4, klassd, 22general,larride, bodylicious, stevie55, benflash, enrypech, tejiri44, C1212, jobseeker, cybersecfreak, swargu, realisticj, greatken, sandieeee, kevlala, moogoogaipan, emmyteetosin, dorado, darella, geektrovert, sibabe thespark, souljar etc, special mentions to Xfire, and my humble self, number5.

Prior to a 9days interview experience conducted at the Nnpc towers, central business district abuja, Intelligent men and women displayed professionalism and decorum as we all prepared towards the experience of a life time. It can be very well recalled that it was at this junction that a certain mosaic4gooners, ex mckinsey, way ahead of the world dude came into limelight. He offered to share a room with anyone interested at sheraton hotels and towers just a few minuites drive from central area, abuja. It remains unknown if anyone took his offer, but that young man would go a long way to make ripples and leave his marks on the sands of time in this thread.

Interview came and went and the AOLMAW was born, chasteguy with the memes, teaser4 with the cut edge pidgin, jarus with drop-dead composure , sempumping with the pumping sauce, beeam with the agbero mentality, and ehmmmm, mosgoon with LOMS

It was also at this point were LOMS was making air waves that burnt sauces, zobo and checking of something was introduced. The aforementioned, are the non-negligible signature of the members of the association of local men and women.

At some point, other notable persons joined the race and added soured sauce (ladyjane, ladyheaven, ademmy, cliffwood, tonyhopkins, easymoneysniper, timilehinpeter, etc)

The access bank theory propounded by larride and the one percent theory by flowolf09 remains the official theory of this great association till date, though the journey has been characterized by notable players jumping ship, most notable from the Access bank theory ship (popularly known as ABT) players like beeam, darella, chasteguy, swargu, flow09, bobowaje, sempumpingson, enireqx, cocococo and its founder, larride.. The impact of the ABT was most felt at the time when a certain anyam 'king in the north' terhemba ran rampage and did great havoc among the members of the association. Special mention in that regard, to cocococo, a brother who was massively hit by king anyams sniper and he 'lost all his ability to can'.

Massive shots by king anyam, and his two foot-soldiers: farouk freedom and lazarus maikalu, ensured that even someone as rigid as jarus confessed that its not an easy life for a local man trying to can.

We can't forget the bromance that broke out between members of the association in the course of the run of time. Notably experienced were between jiang and pumpingson, chasteguy and ladyjane, etc

Brethren, ladies and mentlegen, what is left of the recruitment is undoubtedly a few days but the periods that spanned from inception till date is one wich will never be forgotten by the members of this prestigious thread, NNPC HQ, Nairaland community and the Ghost readers.

If you're years into the future reading this post, no matter were the eagle landed, be very well assured that we made a name for ourselves, we carved a niche, we made our prints in the sands of our time and against all odds, every single member of this prestigious association went on to have a wonderful and successful career.

At this junction, i would crave our indulgence to observe a minuite silence for one of our senior brother/colleague who lost his life in the course of the run of time (NNPC HR STAFF WHO DIED 3rd September 2019, MR DEWARI AYE) A minuite silence.


Special mentions to the official dreamer of the association, all local men and women i failed to mention, all the ghost readers, and all who had to put up with our attitudes, banter and jokes whilist looking for ONLY serious info. This post would not be complete if i dont chip in my official meme (find attached)


Yours faithfully, i remain the history keeper of the prestigious ASSOCIATION OF LOCAL MEN AND WOMEN (AOLMAW)


number5, first of my name, reader of books and keeper of knowledge of the time stream.

Jarus:
Lecture 2

*** Hello wan tin, hello wan tin, tin tin tin***

***Hey, bros please change this Mic for me, not working ***

***mic changed***

***Hello, hello, hello...okay this one is working, thank you***

I will advise all local men and women to donate N1k from their reimbursed tfare to buy a new Mic.

***oya, lecture begins***

All protocol duly observed.

I feel honoured to be invited to speak on this auspicious occasion marking the eve of easymoney APL celebration by NNPC Local Men & Women Association, even though I don't like the Uncle y'all add to my name here. You make me feel like Methuselah.

As I did not have time to prepare for this lecture, let me just read out an article I wrote before the 2019 elections on Petroleum Industry Outlook Post 2019 Elections



***sips water***continues***



****another interruption: someone walks up to drop a small paper ****

***Announcement: Abeg who park Mercedez Benz 4matic with registration number LND419AJ outside, it is blocking one keke maruwa that wants to leave ***

***lecture continues***




Thank you very much for listening. I wish you all an injury free easymoneyAPL week.

Firstgentleman1:
While we await the next lecture, may I have your attention? The image projected on the screen is the comment of a staff of NNPC on the NNPC thread of 2012 on naijahotjobs. He made that comment to correct impressions of heavy external influence in NNPC recruitment..

Also quoting the words of the NNPC staff in the amphitheatre the day I had my interview: "Several years ago I was sitting here just like you. I came in my suit with my long neck. I knew nobody. Then one fateful evening, I was strolling with my heavily pregnant wife when the call came in. And since then.. I hope I am speaking to someone here? I know you have heard a lot of things outside about this recruitment, but trust me, have Faith and you will be my colleague soon"... That quote isn't verbatim, but his words went like that...

Happy APL eve everyone even when Easymonesniper, the inspiration behind this event is nowhere to be found.

cocococo:
After everything people have seen in this thread, people are still believing an unverified online source that APL will come out tomorrow? You guys still don’t know that APL is the like Jesus’s second coming? It will come like a thief in the night when no man expect.

geektrovert:


Wow. Such details. You are indeed a fine writer, Number5!!!

I remember when we were sharing CBT past questions..or was it when we were narrating interview experience?..how time flies mehn

Jarus, Moosgoon, theSpark and other honourable members have delivered outstanding lectures already..what can local man say again....

Whether APL drops tomorrow or not, we remain family here.

.......

We have shared many laughters, banters, argument and roughplay .

We have fought, teased each other, abused each other, but at the end of every day, we still find a way to remain united.

United. As fellows, as brothers and sisters on the divine journey to the towers. We are family.

Moosgoon vs DanXplore
Teaser4 vs Kevlala
Beeam, Benflash, sempumping, teaser4, klassd, jarus, enireqx20, theSpark, macgyver1, souljar and every other honourable member too important to be named.. I hope we meet sometimes in the future..

I love you guys

Well that's too emotional , we gather dey sha..

If God says we will meet at Abuja, I can't wait to put a.face behind all.these Monikers.

PS: APL might/might not come tomorrow, let's go easy on the adrenaline...


I remain my honourable self.

Geektrovert of Gazdallion
Protector of the thirteen Castles
Slayer of the five-headed Dragon
Chairman, LOMWAN Election Commission

Phenolic:
I don't care if APL comes tomorrow or not so far my name is there.
Having said that, i will actually love to be friends with both Beam and Mosgoon at the training camp. I need that balance of IQ and EQ. Oga Jarus will be my mentor.
Number 5, i owe you a bottle of water when we meet for this articulatly written masterpiece.
Finally, I hope it's not too late to submit my application as a member of the association of Local men. These local people are anything but local. See you all at the towers by God's grace.

Obasi001:
[b]This is the day that the Lord has made

joobseekar:
Big thanks to all speakers and everybody you guys are legit, no doubt.


#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow

All the emails of the successful candidates must have been extracted by now


#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow

All the phone numbers of the successful applicants must have been collated by now

#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow

The HR(s) in charge, are busy with their computers right now, ready to dispatch...

#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow

The Orientation date has been determined already

#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow

The email and/SMS might start dropping between 3-5am

#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow

The training date has been determined already

#IfAPLisDroppingTomorrow


Add yours...

Slammmmmmmm:
Now that our watch has just started

We're NNPC Hopefuls of the APL night's watch

Sempumping:
@ number5 ,Great write-up .I am a man by the way