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Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by rosalieene(f): 12:21pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ginaolo:you're seeming to me as a domineering person from your write ups, must it always be about your family? how close are you to her family too? Somepeople are naturally very shy and its difficult to snap out of that nature, even if she tries, its going to be based on pretense. Dont force her, you don't have to explain anything to anyone. Not mingling with people wouldn't make her a bad wife. dont force her pls. Accept her the way she is. 5 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by bluebay(m): 12:21pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Ikem11:I disagree with you in some areas. At times, what your friends and Family thinks should bother you too. 2 wrongs cannot make a right Man. If family opinion isn’t a matter, why do we always take our girl to see our parents ? 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by petitejolie(f): 12:22pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Ermmm....oga she’s 24 that means she’s still young enough to get into another relationship. She can’t change pls leave alone so another man that wants her type can start making his way. Go and look for your extrovert type. Don’t marry her Nd b giving her unnecessary wahala. Cos this type of woman if u push her to d wall ure finished. 13 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by JJOF(m): 12:23pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Fountainofyouth: |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by BlueAir: 12:23pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
So ..ur point is what?? I should throw away what I believe suits me because there might be negativities im yet to see? Oga gimme space .im not with an indoor mama thesmallgod: 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by philip0906(m): 12:24pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
saucecoder:Aswear! Only behind the keyboards can they spit fire and brimstone, but in real life, they're like water leaf The case of this lady, is quite extreme and I can't deal... 3 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Fragility6: 12:24pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Fountainofyouth:Every mallam with e kettle o. We all cannot like the same thing. Na every woman dey like loud men? 4 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Ikem11(m): 12:26pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
bluebay: You agreeing or disagreeing is not my problem. mine is to give out personal opinion like I just did. I guess you still single which you may counter by lying you married. The day u will get married because your friends and family enjoys the company of the girl is the beginning of your end as a man. 9 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by merits(m): 12:26pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ginaolo: Give her time she will change,especially when she started giving birth to your babies. |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by emonis88: 12:27pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ginaolo:Give her time, when gets to know them better she il ease up it just a matter of time. 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by philip0906(m): 12:27pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
kayzat:Then you and that woman can be a fit...Lock yourselves away from civilisation, what you think? |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by janeedema(f): 12:27pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
In my opinion, your priorities are wrongly placed. You seem to be more concerned about how your woman is perceived by people, than on how much she impacts you. So, let her go and go marry a woman of the people. I know it could be really frustrating when a lady or guy is overly reserved; especially if you are very outgoing. But who says there aren't always prices to pay in love? There are definitely reasons she is acting that way. Low self esteem, lack of trust in people, etc. These are reasons why some people yield themselves from people. They are scared of being hurt or judged. So, maybe your cross is to ensure that you make her know how special she is, and how much the world needs to enjoy her warmth as well. Build her emotional bank account. As she begins to get familiar with your family and friends she will loosen up. If you love her that much, then you should walk her through her fears of shielding from people. She must have had a difficult childhood void of love. Don't just say she is reserved; find out the root cause of this. For there always is. Albeit, if you feel this is one cross you aren't prepared to carry, kindly let her go. Because if you aren't ready to defend her and shield her from friends and family, while you help her come out of her phobia for people, then you truly don't deserve her. quote author=ginaolo post=83099057]I met her randomly on the road it wasn’t in a social setting. But how do I deal with her not wanting to meet family and friends? It’s disrespectful to me. As a wife you have to be open to meet my family atleast, when they are always asking about her, I can’t keep on making excuses for her na. People think there’s something wrong with my gf even though I’ve told them she is the shy type. [/quote] 14 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by sweetrace(f): 12:28pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ginaolo: Please men don’t complain this much. She is nervous around people she’s not used to. You make her comfortable enough to open up. I used to be extremely shy. I dated a guy who was my complete opposite. Very outgoing and mature in behavior even though we were the same age. He never mentioned my shyness. He just acted like I was the best thing to happen to him. Meanwhile, he was the best thing to happen to me. His friends and family took their cue from him and seemed excited to meet with me. Since I did not feel like anyone was being critical of me, I was comfortable enough to be me. 11 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Funkybabee(f): 12:28pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
hmmmmm they are the type that won't want a visitor to stay in their house. reason very well 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Christafarian(m): 12:28pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
baby124:Finally we gat someone who is in touch with reality. The OP narrated a disturbing case of a manifest sociopath and some omni-know-it-all Nairalanders went advisorial, instead of offering medical or psychological counsel to the poor guy. Dear OP, I align myself with the above clear thought and adopt it as if same were mine; I kindly advise you to accept it hook, line & sinker. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by fredopareto(m): 12:28pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Simple matter..teach her how to drink gin or beer..her self courage will b back.d best at of all,Indian hemp..tank me later |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by 2dice01: 12:29pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
theButterfly:oya let's get married asap 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by philip0906(m): 12:29pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Blinkers:Easy no be war...What that man described there, is an extreme. I can assure you, except you're also as extreme as she is, if you marry such person, e go tire you. No one is saying a woman should be too extroverted, infact I like my woman reserved too, but not to the point of hiding from family & friends & people in general, which is what the @op described there. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by bonnyhope: 12:30pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ValCon888: dont mind the guy, he wants someone that would be dragging him from one club to another men dont know what they want in women 2 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by 2undeee(m): 12:32pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
A beg give me her contact my type of wife material pls and pls me I want her like that make she no change 2 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Herrmes: 12:33pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
What I see is a guy that can’t handle situations, I’m sorry for the harsh evaluation, tell your family that they are going to have to be patient, that she’s shy, and they might see her once in a while in these events only, but in the future she’s always going to be present, that they are going to have to be patient because it’s her you chose, it’s non negotiable, Then go ahead and work on your woman, take her shopping, I’m sure she’ll love that all women do, just get her comfortable with going out with you, take her to places she likes, then slowly introduce her to your family, maybe a few of them at first, one or two, make sure you guys spend quality time, can be at your place, get the females of your family to come along with the males, 2 couples at most just take everything so fucking slow, then get her to meet your parents and remember to tell everybody you’re introducing her to, to try their utmost best to make her comfortable and welcome, and to take things slowly, she might not still get used to crowds, so spend little time at them at first then increase the amount time you spend, if it’s a good time she might not even notice, if at anytime she gets anxiety attacks then take her away to a place she loves again and still stay with her. It’s a lot of work but the way I see it you have a gem but you don’t know what to do with it and it will be worth it. It’s a commitment man. ginaolo please read this. 5 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by mudiana(m): 12:33pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ginaolo:you didn't mention anything about her family or her relationship with them, you sure say no be ghost she be 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by ehix89(m): 12:34pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
baby124:How do you judge a woman you have not even met 10 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Nobody: 12:34pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
:PEverybody mustn't be outgoing. My brother was like that and he struggled with relationships because girls also thought he is weird and maybe psychopathic. Even my parents complained. They felt he was docile for a man- meaning they probably wouldn't have complained that much if it were me. However, I understood him and so many times I had to speak when words failed him at occasions and all through our days in secondary school. That is what you should do, carry her along in public events that she agrees to attend, don't leave her all to herself. With time she might outgrow it, if she doesn't- it is still not as bad as you make it. Or just leave her for a man that'll appreciate her type. 8 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by seanjy4konji: 12:35pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Leave that lady alone... Later in life?she will find a way of making your avoid your own family and then you are doomed... By the time your family have access to youthe slow poison would have had effect and your elder sister will fight her way into the house to pick you up to hospital cos of the love where you will probably give up the ghost.. she might come to hospital then asking if you have done your will... 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by philip0906(m): 12:35pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Christafarian:I was just laughing at the comments...Shows that many of these guys in here, are sociopaths like the @op's girl, who are internet warriors behind keyboards but in real life, are water leafs. I am attracted to calm, reserved & maybe shy women, but not anti-social humans who are at the extreme...I can assure you, many of the men in here screaming that's their type of woman, when they get into such relationships, will get bored and tired when they see what they will be dealing with 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by nnomeh(m): 12:36pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
Just pass her to me... I enjoy people of such nature. Next paragraph pls! 1 Like |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Mariangeles(f): 12:37pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ginaolo:Is she sluggish ? If she's not, then decide if you love her enough to accept her personality or you let her go. Once you've accepted her for who she is, others will respect that . Again, give your family and friends time to get to know her more, so they'll come to accept her the way she is . Don't overindulge her or she might get worse. If she truly loves you and want to be with you, she will be willing to work on herself to please you. Don't expect too much change at a time. You both can meet each other half way. Whenever you notice she's putting effort, acknowledge and praise her for it. It will make let down her guard a bit more and will be willing to do more . 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by philip0906(m): 12:37pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
ehix89:From what the @op described. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by Blinkers: 12:37pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
philip0906: |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by xangerar: 12:37pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
You seem to be more concerned about Family PR than what fulfils your own private home. It should first be about what complements and fulfil you before how a goddam elder sister thinks. Marriage is primarily between couples and not families. If I were you I will easily let my family know this is who my wife is and if a family reunion cannot commence until she arrives maybe we could delay it until Christ returns. 9 Likes |
Re: My Wife To Be Is Too Reserved by zhuche(m): 12:39pm On Oct 14, 2019 |
If you truly love her, help and stand by her.. you can try organizing mini party in your house that won't cost much, ofcourse you should let your friends know the reason for the gathering. If your woman keeps recieving guests, over time she will be comfortable with it... Invite few friends and increase the number as you observe her reaction and adaption. There is no problem without a solution, but how you go about it is very important. Feel free to Google some tips on how to help her too. Shalom. 3 Likes |
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