CyberWolf:
Be running your mouth anyhow here insulting your parents, when the trouble comes, don’t come here to disturb us. Before you take a final decision, there are some things to consider. Is the girl in question influenced by her parents? I mean is she the type that is not ready to disobey her parents when it comes to things about you both? ... Has your parent ever stood against your decision in anyway except this marriage issue? ... The way you’re tapping about love hmmm, make I no talk. But as a man, marry a woman that loves and respect you more than you do.

Oga who dey run mouth for here if not you, learn how to talk to people with courtesy.

Palace32:
Oga who dey run mouth for here if not you, learn how to talk to people with courtesy.

You know what is courtesy yet you’re here insulting your parents.

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Mogambo123:
My brother, I'm igbo too and my elder brother Married a Yoruba, and they have been living happily together for 20 years . I was surprised in 2017 when I saw a Yoruba woman in Abia State the slay mama was speaking igbo fluently meaning she mostly have lived in the east for a long time, even though she's from Ondo State. Nna that aunty love her igbo husband with a passion.

My dear if you and your love understands that cultural issues will arise and be ready to battle it together please go ahead . I will tell you one thing for sure REAL LOVE IS DIFFICULT TO COME BY If you love this girl please be her knight in shining armour.

I know a guy whose girlfriend took in , she's Yoruba the guy is igbo, my dear the guy's family disowned him, they even wrestled away from him the house he built and he became an outcast , I'm one of those that encouraged him to go ahead with the wedding , even as I speak I still help them out any little way I can. I'm so happy their love is waxing strong, with 2 kids to crown it.

You already have a good idea , please stay away from them for as long as you can, if they don't come to their senses so be it , it's hard to say but am sorry , igbos are the most tribalistic people in Nigeria if you minus religion. If they reject you your Yoruba in-laws will accept you , I have seen that happen a lot. The most liberal in the whole country.

Just make sure this girl loves you that's all.

Oga all tribe are guilty of it so please don't make it an igbo thing. You don't want me to start mentioning the times my friends where rejected by some yoruba parents simply because they are igbos.

I have about 4 cusins who are married to yoruba women and 2 that married from edo.
You don't use few to judge the majority.

The highest inter marriage in Nigeria is between the igbos and yorubas.

Ps. You sound tribalistic.

Op tell your WOMAN that when you people get married that you people are going to relocate to the east or south south permanent and watch are reactions and that of her parents from there you can judge if she will make the same sacrifice you are about to make all in the name of love

Whatever sacrifice you are about to make for the sake of love make sure your woman can reciprocate the same if things where the other way round...... just saying

CyberWolf:
You know what is courtesy yet you’re here insulting your parents.

Kindly point out where I insulted them Mr?

Makes sense. Will try this. Let's see how it goes..

Emotionss:
Op tell your WOMAN that when you people get married that you people are going to relocate to the east or south south permanent and watch are reactions and that of her parents from there you can judge if she will make the same sacrifice you are about to make all in the name of love

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Palace32:
Makes sense. Will try this. Let's see how it goes..

what I detect from your post is that your parents are afraid that since you are communicating with your woman with HER TRIBAL LANGUAGE then the possibility of you teaching and communicate with your children with igbo language is very slim. That my friend is their main reason for saying no.

Emotionss:
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what I detect from your post is that your parents are afraid that since you are communicating with your woman with HER TRIBAL LANGUAGE then the possibility of you teaching and communicate with your children with igbo language is very slim. That my friend is their main reason for saying no.

I am very fluent in both Yoruba and Igbo. It's a done deal that I would be speaking Igbo language to my children. I'm not sure that's the reason tho

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Palace32:
Makes sense. Will try this. Let's see how it goes..

Communicating with your woman in yoruba in your parents house was your undoing. Unknowingly, you have giving them reasons to believe that your woman has the upper hand in the relationship therefore the possibility of their grand children learning and speaking igbo language is almost impossible.

Already the igbo language is dying gradually because of parents not teaching their kids igbo. So you need to assure them that that will not be the case with you.

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Palace32:


I am very fluent in both Yoruba and Igbo. It's a done deal that I would be speaking Igbo language to my children. I'm not sure that's the reason tho

You will be surprised

Emotionss:
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You will be surprised

I'm not sure it's one of the reasons sir. Its more deeper

Palace32:
Kindly point out where I insulted them Mr?

Saying that you’ve perfected the plans of calling your parents bluff on a public forum is an insult to them and also giving some notorious tribalists here to call your parents all sorts of names, one specifically called your parents “useless” and you did nothing about it, that’s a direct insult to your parents. You’re very stubborn because of blind love, I’ve come across your type many times but all these your gragra will be cleared very soon, just very soon. Go ahead and marry the “love of your life”.

CyberWolf:
Saying that you’ve perfected the plans of calling your parents bluff on a public forum is an insult to them and also giving some notorious tribalists here to call your parents all sorts of names, one specifically called your parents “useless” and you did nothing about it, that’s a direct insult to your parents. You’re very stubborn because of blind love, I’ve come across your type many times but all these your gragra will be cleared very soon, just very soon. Go ahead and marry the “love of your life”.

I haven't deleted my original post. Please quote where I called my parent useless or forever remain silent!

Palace32:
I haven't deleted my original post. Please quote where I called my parent useless or forever remain silent!

I said you gave some notorious tribalists here the gut to call your parents useless and you didn’t do anything about it, that shows you agree with them. I know your stubbornness won’t allow you to see that but continue, we will still read your wailing here las las. No be today..

CyberWolf:
I said you gave some notorious tribalists here the gut to call your parents useless and you didn’t do anything about it, that shows you agree with them. I know your stubbornness won’t allow you to see that but continue, we will still read your wailing here las las. No be today..

I don't have your time. Goodnight

Palace32:

I don't have your time. Goodnight

Good luck!

Kobicove:


It will do you a lot of good to listen to advise from your parents in this situation

Inter tribal marriages usually come with a lot of challenges

He is claiming love love, until his eyes go clear. Inter tribal marriages can be very challenging.

ericbertrand:
I don't really blame them for being tribalistic. The scars of the civil war are still there. No tribe has suffered as much as the Igbos so its only normal they are distrusting of other regions.

But the stupid scare of civil war does not stop you lots from trooping to south west for a better living. I wonder why some people find it so convenient to defend stupidity at all times. Nonsense

djon78:


He is claiming love love, until his eyes go clear. Inter tribal marriages can be very challenging.

See dem, bad belle..
Inter tribal marriage is challenging but interracial is cool abi??

Awon boda oshi.

Emotionss:
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Communicating with your woman in yoruba in your parents house was your undoing. Unknowingly, you have giving them reasons to believe that your woman has the upper hand in the relationship therefore the possibility of their grand children learning and speaking igbo language is almost impossible.

Already the igbo language is dying gradually[b][/b] because of parents not teaching their kids igbo. So you need to assure them that that will not be the case with you.

Lol, na him go come resurrect am?

olalat:

But the stupid scare of civil war does not stop you lots from trooping to south west for a better living. I wonder why some people find it so convenient to defend stupidity at all times. Nonsense

Why the insults?

Emotionss:
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Oga all tribe are guilty of it so please don't make it an igbo thing. You don't want me to start mentioning the times my friends where rejected by some yoruba parents simply because they are igbos.

I have about 4 cusins who are married to yoruba women and 2 that married from edo.
You don't use few to judge the majority.

The highest inter marriage in Nigeria is between the igbos and yorubas.

Ps. You sound tribalistic.

U r very wrong.... The highest inter marriage is Yoruba and edos


Confirm ur facts before posting

Palace32:
Hello fellow Nairalanders.

I have a very strong issue bothering my mind, there is this lady I'm in love with, the love is very mutual as she is also madly in love with me too. She's everything I want in a woman and I am planning on getting married and settling down with her next year.

The issue is that, I am Igbo but my girlfriend Yoruba. Personally, I have no issue with that, she doesn't too but my parent does. This past week, mum overheard me speaking to her on the phone in Yoruba language and with the way I sounded over the phone, she knew we were dating. Immediately I ended the call with my girlfriend, my mum asked if that was my gf I just finished speaking yoruba to on the phone, I nodded in affirmation, mum said it's over her dead body will I marry a Yoruba girl, she was warning me when my Dad entered, my Dad being a Pastor, I thought he would reason with me and see reason from my perspective, but instead, he supported my mother.

They both gave me reasons why the idea of me marrying my Yoruba gf is dead on arrival. One of it is how my gf will cope anytime we travel to our home town and she's invited to the Igbo women meetings, will she be hired an interpreter to interprete bits by bits whatsoever they are saying? Or will she forced them to speak English instead of the official igbo language being spoken at meeting?

Another reason they both gave me is that, no one in our lineage has married to anyone who is not igbo, both from my Paternal or Maternal side and I won't be the first. My Dad once said that if eventually I marry my Yoruba gf, I will forget my roots, I won't be coming home regularly and with time, she will force me not to come home at all.. and so on and so forth.

It's so glaring that my parent are TRIBALISTIC. There is no two ways about it.

I really love this girl, she's very decent. Her mum is aware we are dating and it seems there won't be any problem or issue from my gf's family side. I really want to marry her as she's my ideal type of woman, however, leaving her can be mentally and emotionally damaging to us.

How do I cope with my tribalistic parent? How do I convince them that my love for her knows no boundaries, tribe or race? Is there anything my parent are seeing that is still blind to me?

I'm in dire need for mature minded advice.

Thanks in anticipation

Ur parent re nt tribalist. My dad is like dat, he hates the idea of marrying or even keeping a yoruba girlfriends tho he has many many yoruba friends.

Maybe ur parent had bad previous experience with yoruba pple so dey trying to protect u on dat.

Personally wen i woz dating a yoruba girl, i started seeing 300 reasons why i cant marry from dere. Not that i hate dem ooo

chinchonglee:

Ur parent re nt tribalist. My dad is like dat, he hates the idea of marrying or even keeping a yoruba girlfriends tho he has many many yoruba friends.

Maybe ur parent had bad previous experience with yoruba pple so dey trying to protect u on dat.

Personally wen i woz dating a yoruba girl, i started seeing 300 reasons why i cant marry from dere. Not that i hate dem ooo

But I haven't seen any reasons why I can't marry from the south west. I'm not the first

Palace32:
But I haven't seen any reasons why I can't marry from the south west. I'm not the first

Dnt worry! U ll still start seeing. Av u met with her family?

chinchonglee:

Dnt worry! U ll still start seeing. Av u met with her family?

Yes I have. They are welcoming. No issh from their side

Emotionss:

The highest inter marriage in Nigeria is between the igbos and yorubas.

DenreleDave:

U r very wrong.... The highest inter marriage is Yoruba and edos

I think it was Yoruba/Edo midwest, then there was a drop, and Yoruba/Igbo got to be the highest, now it's getting back to Yoruba/Edo.

Just guessing.

Creation of new states might have affected the trends eg splitting Bendel state.

Palace32:
Thank you very much for this great piece. My next plan of action is to meet our General Overseer in our church, the man is igbo, his son is married to a Yoruba lady. Let see how it goes.
Igbos are the most tribalistic no doubt!! I once chipped the idea of getting married to a Yoruba lady to my uncle's hearing, you need to see the surprised look he gave me. Seriously no one, I mean not a single soul in my family wants a Yoruba in-law. Very pathetic

Dont call All of us tribalistic because love dey shark you.Be Very careful.If we are most tribalistic what of the Northerners and the yorubas outside Lagos.
Restrict it to your family.

My friend be careful.

Aunty!


Why did you specify Yorubas outside Lagos nah?

Family family!!!

This is a sensitive issue.

Marrying your locality can end up happily or it might not end up happily.
Marrying the Yoruba might end up happily or not.

Take your time,don't drag shoulder with them.

Time will heal things ,..
What will be will be and it will definitely be.

Alexaonfleek:
It's really sad that your father forgets the part of the Bible which says a man shall leave his father and mother and the two shall become one.

His father understands that, he just doesn't want him with that particular girl because of his prejudices.

lefulefu:
we nigerians we dont have problem when we marry oyibo or asian but when it comes to marrying outside our tribe we always have issues..why?

I was thinking the same thing, it's senseless.