BiggyB242:


They are married Uncle Kunle, once the girl's parents gives you the permission to take their daughter and her bride price has been made she automatically becomes your wife.

No they aren't as they both have not stood before God, but till now have only stood before tradition, parents and men. She wants God's blessings and wants to stand before Him unblemished.

He knew he was dealing with a born again from the onset and should stick by the rules of engagement even obatala,amadioha,sango,oya,yemoje,amadioha,ikenga,Buddha has rules


Don't get it twisted.

kunleweb:



Yawns, fellow woman hater who calls herself posh, classy, elegant and decent but takes offense when another lady SAys the same about herself, woman hater. The Op's chick isn't responsible for your loneliness. Fix your yourself, turn yourself to a mechanical shop to get fixed today, oode

see this one, you really are ret@ded lol,so yo see my comment as hate? Lol what will some not see on this forum,a vermin with a useless LovePeddler of mother thinks everyone is like the females in his family. OK come and fix me , since you obviously have online human diagnosis. I am waiting,meanwhile how do you want the thunder that will fire you? Loud or silent?

BiggyB242:


"My principle my principle" is the result of failed marriage today, no one wants to bend for the other. Marriage is all about compromise, if you want everything to go your way hmmm... you are on your own and besides once a bride price is paid she automatically becomes his wife other forms of marriage are just ceremony.

I doubt any sane person would believe that everything would go their way, she is not asking for much than for her man to bed her after wedding her in the presence of the Lord, it's not to much to ask, if my man tells me before hand that after marriage we would live with his mother for a while and I go ahead to marry him and turn around later to say I can't live with her because I felt he was only "joking" won't that make me a confused being? We should learn to respect each other's choices.

LilMissFavvy:
If you were not mature to date a staunch born again Christian, then you should not have dated the lady. Wether she is a virgin or not, she gave you her word, no sex before marriage. I know few gals who maintained such rules, and dated till marriage before sex.

Let me not bring in my own personal rules anyways, but if you came this far to ruin your marriage with her, so be it. Just that you have wasted her time. Otherwise, stop wasting time, fix the white wedding and have your wife. Go for all medical tests, not every girl who says no sex before marriage is hiding something, that's it.

So is right for born again christian to left her father house and live and sleep with the same bed with a man that is not her husband?
If she don't want to have sex with a man that paid her bride price, what's stop her from staying in her father house until white wedding?
This is religion madness along with misinterpretating.

Duggedised12:
see this one, you really are ret@ded lol,so yo see my comment as hate? Lol what will some not see on this forum,a vermin with a useless LovePeddler of mother thinks everyone is like the females in his family. OK come and fix me , since you obviously have online human diagnosis. I am waiting,meanwhile how do you want the thunder that will fire you? Loud or silent?

Yawns. Try harder. You took ten light years to come up with this thrash. Waste of fees. Should have been sent to do menial jobs. You're as stvpid as you're broke intellectually. Nigga's got beta use of time. Now. Stay fvcked. Damaged being

scaramucci:
So instead of you to fast track the wedding to the next available Saturday in order to get to shift her pant you decided to put it on hold, right?

The traditional marriage is the real marriage. That's what we were doing before oyinbo man foisted on us and we have been stupid to place more importance on oyinbo idea than our own

kunleweb:



If she does a virginity test, it will hurt the marriage even more. Trust will ne shattered completely in the union.He agreed from the onset and was unable to put her in the mood to make her love and crave for sex.

He has to wait. If she fails his test, it equates fraud, he then has the right to call of the marriage. My two cents

............

LilMissFavvy:
If you were not mature to date a staunch born again Christian, then you should not have dated the lady. Wether she is a virgin or not, she gave you her word, no sex before marriage. I know few gals who maintained such rules, and dated till marriage before sex.

Let me not bring in my own personal rules anyways, but if you came this far to ruin your marriage with her, so be it. Just that you have wasted her time. Otherwise, stop wasting time, fix the white wedding and have your wife. Go for all medical tests, not every girl who says no sex before marriage is hiding something, that's it.

My lil chum chum. Chum Chum Chukwu

paix:
I would sincerely advice you wait till after the wedding. Payment of bride price is an indication that the woman you intend to marry is now readily yours. Please be patient, I don't believe she's hiding anything from you, whether she's a virgin or not; that's not the point. Bear with her and don't nurse any ill feelings. The sex you are craving for, you'll always have it over and over after the wedding. Good luck as you patiently wait.

dude they are married as far as the two families agree and the bride price have been paid they are married

kunleweb:


No they aren't as they both have not stood before God, but till now have only stood before tradition, parents and men. She wants God's blessings and wants to stand before Him unblemished.

He knew he was dealing with a born again from the onset and should stick by the rules of engagement even obatala,amadioha,sango,oya,yemoje,amadioha,ikenga,Buddha has rules


Don't get it twisted.

Well Bro, everyone has their own beliefs. I only blame the guy he would have backout. Leave born-again jore, these set of people are the people with hideous characters.

kunleweb:


No they aren't as they both have not stood before God, but till now have only stood before tradition, parents and men. She wants God's blessings and wants to stand before Him unblemished.

He knew he was dealing with a born again from the onset and should stick by the rules of engagement even obatala,amadioha,sango,oya,yemoje,amadioha,ikenga,Buddha has rules


Don't get it twisted.

please show the place In the Bible that relates with what you said..
and tell me what is the highest type of marriage rite done in the Bible

kunleweb:





Yawns. Try harder. You took ten light years to come up with this thrash. Waste of fees. Should have been sent to do menial jobs. You're as stvpid as you're broke intellectually. Nigga's got beta use of time. Now. Stay fvcked. Damaged being

lol,no i took a second mor0n, i doubt cos you took time to read to page 16 to dig put my comment ,who does that? Lol ,you don't want to fix me again? Mother fucker. Atleast i am not a scammer looking for who to flease of their money on nairaland thief ,they will catch you soon.

kunleweb:


No they aren't as they both have not stood before God, but till now have only stood before tradition, parents and men. She wants God's blessings and wants to stand before Him unblemished.

He knew he was dealing with a born again from the onset and should stick by the rules of engagement even obatala,amadioha,sango,oya,yemoje,amadioha,ikenga,Buddha has rules


Don't get it twisted.

So the parents don't represent God?
God is no longer everywhere?
What has doing marriage in one's culture got to do with obatala and co?
Are we this weak ?
Don't go there as it makes no sense.

Seems u are one of those pastors who deceive ladies but go behind their back to do otherwise.

You should have gone for ladies with the same belief with you. People like you will break marriage vows. But I blame her for accepting you and also for going with to Abuja after traditional rites. Those saying she is not virgin, was that her reason. She believes PREMARITAL SEX is a sin. So if you can't wed her in church and have your love consummated, return the bride price because broken engagement is better than broken home.

StacyO:

Lol
Sorry if my question is odd but please how will a virginty test hurt a marriage?

N yes if he cannot put her in the mood,then he is in for it.

If she fails the test,he has every right to call of the marriage since he has not touched her.
You all should stop confusing @op na

You seem not to understand. A woman is human despite the need for submissiveness in marriage. If he demands for virginity test, it will damage her ability of him to trust her word and their decisions in the marriage proper. The decision from the onset was assumably not about sex or the vagina, but about principles, morals and beliefs, upholding and standing by then will prove his belief in her and improve them even as they go on with decision making tussles within and in the marriage.

My two cents, I can marriage a disvirgined woman, but if you say you're a virgin and no sex, no wahala, if after the first sex you're not a virgin, the next morning, I'm calling it off, its called fraud.

upuphim:
You should have gone for ladies with the same belief with you. People like you will break marriage vows. But I blame her for accepting you and also for going with to Abuja after traditional rites. Those saying she is not virgin, was that her reason. She believes PREMARITAL SEX is a sin. So if you can't wed her in church and have your love consummated, return the bride price because broken engagement is better than broken home.

Straight home. No need to create thread. He still can walk away even now

sassysure:

So the parents don't represent God?
God is no longer everywhere?
What has doing marriage in one's culture got to do with obatala and co?
Are we this weak ?
Don't go there as it makes no sense.

Seems u are one of those pastors who deceive ladies but go behind their back to do otherwise.

Who is this trying to sound wise. The Op's girl isn't the reason for your sloppy morality. Get lost.

Duggedised12:
lol,no i took a second mor0n, i doubt cos you took time to read to page 16 to dig put my comment ,who does that? Lol ,you don't want to fix me again? Mother fucker. Atleast i am not a scammer looking for who to flease of their money on nairaland thief ,they will catch you soon.

Low. Try harder

LadyHeaven:


I doubt any sane person would believe that everything would go their way, she is not asking for much than for her man to bed her after wedding her in the presence of the Lord, it's not to much to ask, if my man tells me before hand that after marriage we would live with his mother for a while and I go ahead to marry him and turn around later to say I can't live with her because I felt he was only "joking" won't that make me a confused being? We should learn to respect each other's choices.

"It isn't much to ask" that how it goes for every other issues, well I don't blame her, the guy who thought he could change her mind is the one to be blamed.

For every 1man there are 3women, don't know why men stress their selves when it comes to issues of finding a wife. Any type of woman a man seeks they are everywhere, is just finance that limits a man's choices.

marvin905:




please show the place In the Bible that relates with what you said..
and tell me what is the highest type of marriage rite done in the Bible

I'll show you if you're the owner of the vagina. Olodo. Kids who denigrate principles, that's why they always fall victims to what wasn't meant for then to become victims of.

kunleweb:



You seem not to understand. A woman is human despite the need for submissiveness in marriage. If he demands for virginity test, it will damage her ability of him to trust her word and their decisions in the marriage proper. The decision from the onset was assumably not about sex or the vagina, but about principles, morals and beliefs, upholding and standing by then will prove his belief in her and improve them even as they go on with decision making tussles within and in the marriage.

My two cents, I can marriage a disvirgined woman, but if you say you're a virgin and no sex, no wahala, if after the first sex you're not a virgin, the next morning, I'm calling it off, its called fraud.

..........

BiggyB242:


Well Bro, everyone has their own beliefs. I only blame the guy he would have backout. Leave born-again jore, these set of people are the people with hideous characters.

I can stake my ticket this isn't about hideous issues. See bro, no woman can ever lie to me. Once any woman does, a man should know where to go to get/find answers without even asking the woman. I catch many a lot before/without confronting them. Plus, one can't get married to someone they haven't watched. If he engaged her, during the courtship he should have ascertained her persona and should ba able to matchup the principles against the personhood to know if hes dealing with a liar, which in this case isn't the case.

midnighter:
But you're still going to marry her in the church so what actually is the problem?

Somebody told you something ahead of time, you say you did not take her serious. now the thing is coming to pass and you're complaining. Nawa

Church wedding is important to some people because of the spiritual implications, why did you go ahead with a born-again if you can't even respect a basic decision like this

And on top of it you put the wedding on hold so you can force her to compromise on her principles Wow

Shouldn't you be happy that you married somebody who actually stands on their word and does as they say? Is this not a good quality to look for in a spouse?

You deserve a medal.

Igwegeorgiano listen to advise

elitejosef:


And what about the financial implication too

By next available Saturday, I mean just follow her the wedding. My fiancee too want her an elaborate white wedding. I told her that when she decides on a date, she should communicate that to me and I will show up on the day of the wedding to play my part. Let her plan the wedding and tell him the date and venue.

StacyO:

Lol
Right on point.

But why will @op live with a woman in his house n still not melt her heart.
Lack romance in a relationship.
The lady is over righteous.... There are something's that just doesn't require it.

By the way you have a very good point.

He's unable to turn her own to lose her guard on his own. He's trying to enter the oucci through her head instead of through her mind. To fvck any lady, you must increase desuriablity and make her mentally fvck you and be all over you mentally before the physical act takes place. Na she go dey ask first.

Ask him of his behavior, you'll see the answers there.

You are so freaking childish yet you want to settle down. She told you everything and her stand before you got into the relationship. If you truly love her you will do the needful then have her as you wish. You are sounding like she is an item you paid for. If you love her follow her lead in the end you both will be happy. Trust me there is nothing as bad as making love to a woman whoose mind is not there. She will resent you eventually.

Adabekee04:
Church/white wedding of course

Traditional wedding or the payment of bride price is not enough for you to sleep with your man?

You're a religious fanatic. White wedding is not in your bible.

kunleweb:


Low. Try harder

scammer ,i pity anyone that does business with you ,thief ,scammer !!!!

Duggedised12:
scammer ,i pity anyone that does business with you ,thief ,scammer !!!!

Blackmail typical when they can't debate intellectually. You lost a debate not money, now go scrub the toilet floor eediat

kunleweb:



Who is this trying to sound wise. The Op's girl isn't the reason for your sloppy morality. Get lost.

If she dont want to have sex, what is she doing in his house,hypocrite?
What message is she sending across by living with him in the same house, isn't that a sin too?
The bible said If your left hand will lead u to sin, cut it off.
She sleeps with a man whose brain is already wired to see her as his wife.
She is a wicked soul.
She should go back to her mother's house in owerri.
Robbing Peter to pay Paul.
The man has restraint and I commend him. Some other would have raped her and nothing will come off it.
She is his wife. Simple.

U hypocrites trying to justify nonsense. How come u didn't see that she is already living with him as his wife yet she is claiming holy.
All the sins that man has been committing because of her is on her , pastor hypocrite who prefer another man's culture than his.
Be it masturbation, be it thinking of looking outside etc is on her head.

igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks

Stay put...No wedding till you have sex. This is how it will go...if you allow this, she will expect you to allow all other rubbish she throws at you as the years go by in your marriage.
The real marriage is the traditional marriage, not white wedding, that one is just party. So tell her, you are now her husband and if she will not do what you want, you will cancel the white wedding entirely.

This is not PRE MARITAL sex. You are now married. Dont let religious fanatics fool you.


She is your wife now, I see no reason why she wants some pastor to tell her that before she starts acting as one.

Virginity test is the best OPTION to clear YOUR DOUBT