Mogambo123:
If she's not a virgin then you av been scammed.

Adabekee04:
It is my choice Darling and I am entitled to it. Thank you

peepydelano:
You are having a very good lady as your wife,count yourself very lucky.Why not fast forward your white wedding and have free access, and its not a big deal if she turns out not to be a virgin,appreciate the fact that she's God fearing. Respect her Godly wish and wait for the abundant blessings that follows,she is blessed amongst women

darelar:
To the OP, am sorry to say this but I pray you won't regret that your action later. Am talking from experience, I was dating a girl that said no to sex and as baddo wey I be, I try to be a good boy for once due to several caution from my friend and one of her friend that I know her through. After almost 2 year's, we did introduction in 2012 during fuel subsidy strike and her parents gave us the full right as husband and wife. My girl still denied me sex and even came to my house and spent 13 days without sex. I have to discharge her with excuse that am going for job in Akwaibon and she needs to go back to her place for Xmas in December 2012. Her mum was very angry with her because of her action and my stands is that she need to be pregnant before I can do final marriage on her head . By 2013, she was pregnant for another guy and thanks to God and my � that I didn't put all my eggs in a basket. When am not pleased with her attitude, I was dating two girls, one said we can't marry on religion basis because of her dad and the other one is same religion which makes it more easier. By July 2014, she gave birth and am happy for her. Her parents disown her and I intervene on her behalf and I let her parents know that is the will of God and I have move on. I did my introduction on July and I invited her parents to my wedding in September, they we're very happy and pray for me and said they can't attend because they won't be able to face my family because of what their daughter did. By December, we're blessed with a child. So OP am not trying to discourage but be wise as both gender could act funny when it comes to preparing for marriage.

marvin905:





let me ask you this question ..
if a white wedding have been conducted will it stop the men from dumping those women

stinflame:


Is She Married now?

BiggyB242:


Beside sex, your wife is headstrong, I pray you will be able to cope in future. Being a virgin doesn't make her a good wife; her character is most important and submissiveness.

marvin905:




and I ask what if he isn't financially capable..

paix:
Church wedding should not be a show of affluence. They can do that even on a Sunday during the church service. It's just for the pastor to bless them as they tie the knot. Since the guy has spent so much during the traditional activities, there should be no point in spending more if he's not buoyant enough. White wedding shouldn't be a do or die affair.

scaramucci:
So instead of you to fast track the wedding to the next available Saturday in order to get to shift her pant you decided to put it on hold, right?

igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks

midnighter:
But you're still going to marry her in the church so what actually is the problem?

Somebody told you something ahead of time, you say you did not take her serious. now the thing is coming to pass and you're complaining. Nawa

Church wedding is important to some people because of the spiritual implications, why did you go ahead with a born-again if you can't even respect a basic decision like this

And on top of it you put the wedding on hold so you can force her to compromise on her principles Wow

Shouldn't you be happy that you married somebody who actually stands on their word and does as they say? Is this not a good quality to look for in a spouse?

sassysure:

That lady is very childish.
Her problem is church service. She isn't bothered about compatibility in bed. What does she know.
All these Pentecostal churches have been breaking homes with their hypocritical and judgemental laws that they manufacture from the back of their brains.
And trust our women. We follow to the end.

Yet, its the same pastors that sleep with their female flocks.

That man said yes at the heat of the moment.
Hoping she will succumb after trado.
It's not really to fulfil her fantasy wish but to tell pastor that she did it on her wedding night. Pastor can use it to boast.
Wonder why husbands of these pious ladies are very promiscuous?

Why do we do church marriage?
Simply an avenue for the clergy to shine. Nothing more.
Also the gifts that follow.
Not because it's the purest form of marriage. U know, we know how to take advantage of things in this part of the world and these men of the pulpit are taken the advantage fully

Acidosis:

[s]The Federal Government of Nigeria must as a matter of urgency place a HEAVY TAX on multiple weddings. You either do one or two of traditional, church/Islamic, and registry or pay a tax of N1,000,000 to your state government. If you are unsatisfied and filled with LUST so much that you desire 3 types of weddings in a poor country like Nigeria, you must forfeit 1 million naira to the government. If you don't know how to spend your money, the government will help.[/s]

LilMissFavvy:
If you were not mature to date a staunch born again Christian, then you should not have dated the lady. Wether she is a virgin or not, she gave you her word, no sex before marriage. I know few gals who maintained such rules, and dated till marriage before sex.

Let me not bring in my own personal rules anyways, but if you came this far to ruin your marriage with her, so be it. Just that you have wasted her time. Otherwise, stop wasting time, fix the white wedding and have your wife. Go for all medical tests, not every girl who says no sex before marriage is hiding something, that's it.

Yuneehk:
That's a disciplined and stubborn woman you've got. You had an agreement before the relationship even started and said she's a born again christian who appreciates the things of God. Finish what you started by wedding her in the church if that's what she wants and enjoy her as you'd want to. Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well.

Mogambo123:
If she's not a virgin then you av been scammed.

healthserve:





See who's spreading fears again


EkperemoEgbabi Apitch Willie2015


Now wasn't I accurate the other day?

Adabekee04:
It is my choice Darling and I am entitled to it. Thank you

midnighter:


Lol, I hope you can respond like this the next time you have an arrangement with somebody and they back out of it at the last minute

Sirvingeo:
op you got a good wife. She has the fear of God that is why she wants you to do the church wedding which depicts God's involvement. You better don't loose a good woman because of sex o. I promise you a lady that could go this far for God will never cheat on you after wedding .

I wish you happy marriage life and I pray I get a godly wife like her. Amen!!!

joshrare:


your third leg is controlling you. oga, finish what you've started, she's very on point brov. Tradition has nothing against premarital sex, it is the church that is against it. So respect her and take her to the altar.

what if she gets pregnant will she still be wedded in the church wearing white?

Acidosis:


Shut up please. What the fvk is the white garment supposed to do? Turn a prostitute to a saint or sanctify the marriage? Turn a nonvirgin to a virgin or turn a virgin to an incorruptible everlasting virgin?


Sometimes some Nigerian Christians can be very disgusting with their thoughts.