crackhaus:

I said that woman has cheated on you, and you are still here typing English.

I just hope you're trolling.

Don't do that.

AwkaetitiBabe:
Don't do that.

Don't do wha?

crackhaus:

Don't do wha?

How u know she cheating?

Amanee:
The small pe.nis part got me

Both of you need deliverance

And counseling too.. Maybe the guy is not satisfying the lady sexually and guilty conscience is disturbing this guy, I don't know

WTF is wrong with him sharing bills with his wife, cos he’s sharing bills with his wife doesn’t give her the right to disrespect him. Jesus Christ, Nairaland is just filled with immature fools

Akannigbabe:
Sharing bill wit your wife?? How do we get here Man up bro!!! You pushed the lady to that extent from your words

No offense, but you and your wife are mad. What kind of nonsense is this?

AwkaetitiBabe:
How u know she cheating?

Experience.

Women who are constantly threatening to cheat have already done so and are only just using the threats to deflect their husbands suspicion to the fact that it already happened.
OR
They are currently seeing another man with whom they want to have sex with but are still holding back, and making such threats during every argument/fight is only meant to make her intentions justifiable. The idea is to preemptively eliminate that guilt women always feel after the first sex act with a man other than their husbands.

The above two scenarios, is cheating.

I'm betting that if this OP finds a way to monitor her phone messages and/or social media accounts, he will find something that will prove she's not making empty threats.

[quote author=myang500 post=83921509]

You are sexist or is it a feminist or whatever they call your type. You dont see anything wrong in the woman, its always the man. Am not a domineering man neither do I see my wife as though she should be beneath me. She is just a typical modern day disrespectful type, no respect, nothing whatsoever, i wont be surprised if you fall into the same category as her. Going to a counselor is not part of my plan, as every-time we go , instead of trying to reach a solution, shes trying to make herself feel like am the cause of the problem, and shes the saint. Infact the last session showed she had more work to do per the counselors assessment, she was told to come back for more..but she never did[/quotp



e]
Did u see the disrespectful signs before going into d marriage?

crackhaus:

Experience.

Women who are constantly threatening to cheat have already done so and are only just using the threats to deflect their husbands suspicion to the fact that it already happened.
OR
They are currently seeing another man with whom they want to have sex with but are still holding back, and making such threats during every argument/fight is only meant to make her intentions justifiable. The idea is to preemptively eliminate that guilt women always feel after the first sex act with a man other than their husbands.

The above two scenarios, is cheating.

I'm betting that if this OP finds a way to monitor her phone messages and/or social media accounts, he will find something that will prove she's not making empty threats.

I hear you

myang500:

Morin Nlanders,

Is it true that marriage is actually a do or die affair that whatever comes ur way u have to take it and live with it? That question is solely for the married men, and for the married ladies on here, I just wanted to know if you would react the way my wife did regarding what am about to explain, because she said all women are the same that even if i am to re-marry, that the woman will be worse off than she is, but i disagree.
The issue of tending to my food comes with a struggle at times, and being a father of two and living in lagos aint easy. She told me she was going to market to get some supplies for her clothing biz, i was like i hope u did come back soon so i can get breakfast cos i was working from home. She said she would be back before 9, lo and behold, it was already quarter past ten and she called saying shes on her way asking what i would like to eat, i was like is this the promise u made to come back early, she said well there was traffic and that i need to understand that we are sharing bills to pay equally now so I must give her the freedom is hustling per her own timing. I was like I didnt marry you to give me rules, part of the reason why u are my wife to give me food and not what ur saying, i said i have arranged breakfast she should bother. She got back, and the first thing she said is..i have bashed the car because i was rushing home to make u food, i was like i already told u before u drove off that i sorted myself, whats the rushing home to make food for me for. Then it came to my attention that she has consecutively been bashing both cars over the course of 4 days, i was pushed to ask her what she has been doing causing these sort of ill-luck bashing the cars here and there and having the other being fixed almost everyday, weird and un-unsual, she quickly termed it that i was trying to say shes cheating, that i need to get a life and stop being insecured. I was like i'm not insecured, and i cant be insecured over a woman of her looks. She got angry and said, me with my small pen**s, i was like an ugly woman like u can never make me insecured. I kept quiet but she continuously carried out her tantrums. This is coupled with the fact that somestimes last week, she made a statement out of an argument that she will have sexxx with another man in the house and i will never know of it. I was really angry and wanted to report to her dad, she cried and begged me not to, knowing fully well of the consequences that might follow. Ladies can u guys say these sort of things to your hubby out of anger? are u guys all the same?

you are both stupid

My 7 and 8 year old boys can and do make breakfast for themselves. My husband taught them well. How can you not have time for kitchen but you have time to eat?

You guys need to tone down on the abuse. Being verbally abusive to each other does not create a loving environment, it causes everyone to be defensive and looking for war.

Imagine if she had returned and told you about the bashed car and you had said something like, " Honey, I am so sorry that it was because you were rushing home to make breakfast for me that you had an accident. I truly appreciate all your efforts in keeping the home happy. Thank you darling. Let's not make a big deal of the bashed car. Let's see how we can fix it and not let it happen again". Then you give her a hug and a kiss and show her the breakfast you remained for her. Tell me you guys wont be having a great time.

You cannot change someone's behaviour but you can only change your reaction. Please, enough with the abusive words. They are not good habits to form.

Verbal abuse everywhere.

crackhaus:

Experience.

Women who are constantly threatening to cheat have already done so and are only just using the threats to deflect their husbands suspicion to the fact that it already happened.
OR
They are currently seeing another man with whom they want to have sex with but are still holding back, and making such threats during every argument/fight is only meant to make her intentions justifiable. The idea is to preemptively eliminate that guilt women always feel after the first sex act with a man other than their husbands.

The above two scenarios, is cheating.

I'm betting that if this OP finds a way to monitor her phone messages and/or social media accounts, he will find something that will prove she's not making empty threats.

Part of the major problem I have here is that, deep inside of me I know this woman must have cheated on me, I cant count the number of clues that I have seen over the last couple of years. Infact this past june, i figured out that she moved a deleted chat of she and her ex to whatsapp arvhive, and another message of this jaruma type online seller talking about how what she bought from her didnt work. Supposedly love potion. I asked why she moved message from main to archive if she didnt have something to hide, she was like the dude says alot of rubbish and she wouldnt want me to see such and start thinking otherwise. Plenty attimes, when am entering the honey pot, it feels different, feels bruised, honey pot wey i don dey knack for years, i know the feeling if its fresh and if its not. I cant even begin to count clues here, but it bothers me alot to know that she is cheating but cant find shit out. She has surpassed phone and monitoring stuffs, she upped her game and i aint trying to follow up anything as it can kill a man in no time. This is a woman where if issues arise, she wants to just say sorry and expect me to move on, after doing something very terrible, but if i aint gotten over myself in like a week, you'll start hearing stuffs like this is the kind of thing that will make give give listening hears to those that wants to listen and make her vulnerable to cheating. Thats when you'll see that she starts to change her looks, start wearing move revealing clothes out, thats probably to make me feel somehow, or otherwise. I will repeat guys, you destiny is attached to whom u marry, choose wisely.

[quote author=drmikeadams post=83927772][/quote]


I saw it, we only dated for 2 weeks, pregnancy involve, i dont know much about her, but the little i have seen, i wouldnt have been able to ask for her hand in marriage. I have dated plenty,and I can categorically say shes not my type. N yansh put me for this situation, though with 2 children, am sort of stalk.

Poster divorce her and rest. It's obvious you are in pain, you don't see her as someone that is worth it, you guys should go your separate ways. Just make sure you both take good care of your kids.

What did I just read? Is this a comedy or what? More like two strange bedfellows in marriage.

myang500:


Part of the major problem I have here is that, deep inside of me I know this woman must have cheated on me, I cant count the number of clues that I have seen over the last couple of years. Infact this past june, i figured out that she moved a deleted chat of she and her ex to whatsapp arvhive, and another message of this jaruma type online seller talking about how what she bought from her didnt work. Supposedly love potion. I asked why she moved message from main to archive if she didnt have something to hide, she was like the dude says alot of rubbish and she wouldnt want me to see such and start thinking otherwise. Plenty attimes, when am entering the honey pot, it feels different, feels bruised, honey pot wey i don dey knack for years, i know the feeling if its fresh and if its not. I cant even begin to count clues here, but it bothers me alot to know that she is cheating but cant find shit out. She has surpassed phone and monitoring stuffs, she upped her game and i aint trying to follow up anything as it can kill a man in no time. This is a woman where if issues arise, she wants to just say sorry and expect me to move on, after doing something very terrible, but if i aint gotten over myself in like a week, you'll start hearing stuffs like this is the kind of thing that will make give give listening hears to those that wants to listen and make her vulnerable to cheating. Thats when you'll see that she starts to change her looks, start wearing move revealing clothes out, thats probably to make me feel somehow, or otherwise. I will repeat guys, you destiny is attached to whom u marry, choose wisely.

myang500:


Part of the major problem I have here is that, deep inside of me I know this woman must have cheated on me, I cant count the number of clues that I have seen over the last couple of years. Infact this past june, i figured out that she moved a deleted chat of she and her ex to whatsapp arvhive, and another message of this jaruma type online seller talking about how what she bought from her didnt work. Supposedly love potion. I asked why she moved message from main to archive if she didnt have something to hide, she was like the dude says alot of rubbish and she wouldnt want me to see such and start thinking otherwise. Plenty attimes, when am entering the honey pot, it feels different, feels bruised, honey pot wey i don dey knack for years, i know the feeling if its fresh and if its not. I cant even begin to count clues here, but it bothers me alot to know that she is cheating but cant find shit out. She has surpassed phone and monitoring stuffs, she upped her game and i aint trying to follow up anything as it can kill a man in no time. This is a woman where if issues arise, she wants to just say sorry and expect me to move on, after doing something very terrible, but if i aint gotten over myself in like a week, you'll start hearing stuffs like this is the kind of thing that will make give give listening hears to those that wants to listen and make her vulnerable to cheating. Thats when you'll see that she starts to change her looks, start wearing move revealing clothes out, thats probably to make me feel somehow, or otherwise. I will repeat guys, you destiny is attached to whom u marry, choose wisely.

the reason your wife don’t respect you, is because you dont respect her. See the way you are talking about your wife to strangers. If you cant respect her, at least respect yourself or your children.

myang500:

Morin Nlanders,

Is it true that marriage is actually a do or die affair that whatever comes ur way u have to take it and live with it? That question is solely for the married men, and for the married ladies on here, I just wanted to know if you would react the way my wife did regarding what am about to explain, because she said all women are the same that even if i am to re-marry, that the woman will be worse off than she is, but i disagree.
The issue of tending to my food comes with a struggle at times, and being a father of two and living in lagos aint easy. She told me she was going to market to get some supplies for her clothing biz, i was like i hope u did come back soon so i can get breakfast cos i was working from home. She said she would be back before 9, lo and behold, it was already quarter past ten and she called saying shes on her way asking what i would like to eat, i was like is this the promise u made to come back early, she said well there was traffic and that i need to understand that we are sharing bills to pay equally now so I must give her the freedom is hustling per her own timing. I was like I didnt marry you to give me rules, part of the reason why u are my wife to give me food and not what ur saying, i said i have arranged breakfast she should bother. She got back, and the first thing she said is..i have bashed the car because i was rushing home to make u food, i was like i already told u before u drove off that i sorted myself, whats the rushing home to make food for me for. Then it came to my attention that she has consecutively been bashing both cars over the course of 4 days, i was pushed to ask her what she has been doing causing these sort of ill-luck bashing the cars here and there and having the other being fixed almost everyday, weird and un-unsual, she quickly termed it that i was trying to say shes cheating, that i need to get a life and stop being insecured. I was like i'm not insecured, and i cant be insecured over a woman of her looks. She got angry and said, me with my small pen**s, i was like an ugly woman like u can never make me insecured. I kept quiet but she continuously carried out her tantrums. This is coupled with the fact that somestimes last week, she made a statement out of an argument that she will have sexxx with another man in the house and i will never know of it. I was really angry and wanted to report to her dad, she cried and begged me not to, knowing fully well of the consequences that might follow. Ladies can u guys say these sort of things to your hubby out of anger? are u guys all the same?

Young man, call your wife and have a hearty talk with her, you should both apologize to each other and carve out ways to make your marriage succeed against all odds. Above all forgive and let go!

myang500:

Morin Nlanders,

Is it true that marriage is actually a do or die affair that whatever comes ur way u have to take it and live with it? That question is solely for the married men, and for the married ladies on here, I just wanted to know if you would react the way my wife did regarding what am about to explain, because she said all women are the same that even if i am to re-marry, that the woman will be worse off than she is, but i disagree.
The issue of tending to my food comes with a struggle at times, and being a father of two and living in lagos aint easy. She told me she was going to market to get some supplies for her clothing biz, i was like i hope u did come back soon so i can get breakfast cos i was working from home. She said she would be back before 9, lo and behold, it was already quarter past ten and she called saying shes on her way asking what i would like to eat, i was like is this the promise u made to come back early, she said well there was traffic and that i need to understand that we are sharing bills to pay equally now so I must give her the freedom is hustling per her own timing. I was like I didnt marry you to give me rules, part of the reason why u are my wife to give me food and not what ur saying, i said i have arranged breakfast she should bother. She got back, and the first thing she said is..i have bashed the car because i was rushing home to make u food, i was like i already told u before u drove off that i sorted myself, whats the rushing home to make food for me for. Then it came to my attention that she has consecutively been bashing both cars over the course of 4 days, i was pushed to ask her what she has been doing causing these sort of ill-luck bashing the cars here and there and having the other being fixed almost everyday, weird and un-unsual, she quickly termed it that i was trying to say shes cheating, that i need to get a life and stop being insecured. I was like i'm not insecured, and i cant be insecured over a woman of her looks. She got angry and said, me with my small pen**s, i was like an ugly woman like u can never make me insecured. I kept quiet but she continuously carried out her tantrums. This is coupled with the fact that somestimes last week, she made a statement out of an argument that she will have sexxx with another man in the house and i will never know of it. I was really angry and wanted to report to her dad, she cried and begged me not to, knowing fully well of the consequences that might follow. Ladies can u guys say these sort of things to your hubby out of anger? are u guys all the same?

Maturity is very crucial in marriage, I don't mean to be matured biologically but mentally.
Sorry to tell you that she is not Matured mentally.
Read more of marriage and Relationships at... https://allsinglesandmarried..com

Sorry but was there any reason you couldn't take her excuse of traffic? It's very possible to come back an hour or even 2 hours after saying you would in this country without it necessarily being your fault. I don't really see why you got so agitated, when you realised she wasn't coming you could have ordered something for the two of you and then she could have gotten started on lunch.

Having said that I cringed inwardly when she mentioned that "splitting bills". That was not necessary; even if she is paying all the bills it doesn't mean she shouldn't come back when she says she's coming, she should have stuck to the point and not gone off-topic. So that means there won't be traffic again if she doesn't pay any bills?

Probably you need to watch your words when you are talking to each other, most of this stuff you guys are saying to each other is so embarrassing to read, next time try to moderate your tone so that you won't end up trading needless insults.

At least I can appreciate you for bringing the whole story here and not just the ones she did. It's good that you can at least admit your own wrong because usually everybody complains that OP is "just one side of the story, we need to hear from the other person"

myang500:


Part of the major problem I have here is that, deep inside of me I know this woman must have cheated on me, I cant count the number of clues that I have seen over the last couple of years. Infact this past june, i figured out that she moved a deleted chat of she and her ex to whatsapp arvhive, and another message of this jaruma type online seller talking about how what she bought from her didnt work. Supposedly love potion. I asked why she moved message from main to archive if she didnt have something to hide, she was like the dude says alot of rubbish and she wouldnt want me to see such and start thinking otherwise. Plenty attimes, when am entering the honey pot, it feels different, feels bruised, honey pot wey i don dey knack for years, i know the feeling if its fresh and if its not. I cant even begin to count clues here, but it bothers me alot to know that she is cheating but cant find shit out. She has surpassed phone and monitoring stuffs, she upped her game and i aint trying to follow up anything as it can kill a man in no time. This is a woman where if issues arise, she wants to just say sorry and expect me to move on, after doing something very terrible, but if i aint gotten over myself in like a week, you'll start hearing stuffs like this is the kind of thing that will make give give listening hears to those that wants to listen and make her vulnerable to cheating. Thats when you'll see that she starts to change her looks, start wearing move revealing clothes out, thats probably to make me feel somehow, or otherwise. I will repeat guys, you destiny is attached to whom u marry, choose wisely.

I am really glad you shared this. I am glad NOT because it corroborates my comments, but because you just showed that your intuition is still very much fine-tuned.

The issue now is a simple one because it's just a case of what are you going to do at this point?
Do you want to save your marriage and get it back to a place of total peace and fidelity, or do you believe it is too far gone to be salvaged?

The reason why I deliberately ignored that whole story about how you summoned her to get back home just to cook your meal, was because that isn't the main issue.
Even though majority of the posters here chose to fixate on that bit, it was obvious to me that the only reason you would be so inconsiderate as to order her back home to serve your food, was an attempt to show you still had some kind of power over her. And when a man starts to do odd things in a bid to assert control over his wife, then the issues between them runs far deeper.

Now to the original question in your topic, the answer is NO, you can and MUST NOT tolerate all that nonsense from your wife. Her continuous threats and misbehaviour have gone on for so long because you allowed it.
Tell her that you have had quite enough of the threats and that she should pray fervently to her God for you not to find any hard evidence that she has been cheating on you, else she will find out the difference between six and half-a-dozen.

Also, you have to stop exchanging words with her or making degrading comments about her looks.

If you noticed, I have not suggested you directly accuse her of cheating or advocated any form of separation between you two.
This is because, since you have had the suspicion for so long but made no move to get any evidence, then you probably can remain married. Just caution her as I stated above.

Cheers.

zeb04:
[s]the reason your wife don’t respect you, is because you dont respect her. See the way you are talking about your wife to strangers. If you cant respect her, at least respect yourself or your children.[/s]

Someone is expressing himself regarding suspicions of his wife's infidelity and this viral infection is typing total nonsense about respect & strangers.
What's the connection?

You must definitely be a cheat as well for that comment to be causing you discomfort.

crackhaus:
That woman has 100% cheated on you.

She may do it again, she may not do it again...but all the same, please accept my condolences.

Stop this .

elektra:
LMAO
You are in the house but you are calling somebody in the market to come back and give you food. Does that make sense? What happened to your hands? She is splitting bills with you, but you find it beneath you to make food for your own self? I just tire.

Do You see what women see in marriage lyk his hands are broken

crackhaus:

I am really glad you shared this. I am glad NOT because it corroborates my comments, but because you just showed that your intuition is still very much fine-tuned regardless of what your wife might be thinking.

The issue now is a simple one because it's just a case of what are you going to do now?
Do you want to save your marriage and get it back to a place of total peace and fidelity, or do you believe it is too far gone to be salvaged?

The reason why I deliberately ignored that whole story about how you summoned her to get back home just to cook your meal, was because that isn't the main issue.
Even though majority of the posters here chose to fixate on that bit, it was obvious to me that the only reason you would be so inconsiderate as to order her back home to serve your food, was to show you still had some power over her. And when a man starts to do odd things in a bid to assert control over his wife, then the issues between them runs far deeper.

Now to the original question in your topic, the answer is NO, you can and MUST NOT tolerate all that nonsense from your wife. Her continuous threats and misbehaviour have gone on for so long because you allowed it.
Tell her that you have had quite enough of the threats and that she should pray fervently to her God so you don't find hard evidence that she has been cheating on you, else she will find out the difference between six and half-a-dozen.

Also, you have to stop exchanging words with her or making comments about her looks.

If you notice, I have not suggested you directly accuse her of cheating on you or advocated separation.
This is because, since you have had the suspicion for this long but made no move to get any evidence, then you probably can stay married. Just caution her as stated above.

Cheers.

And what is the difference between six and half-a-dozen? Lmao

Man you killing me, you're always killing me

No,all women arent the same.
IGBOwill say''Make Goodfriend incase itwill lead to marriage.Both of You have caustic tongue and lacks respect for each other.
The only words i have to say is that both of You are joking.You lack respect for each other and spew words that will emotionally kill the other.

Its a Very sad one cos kids are involved.
Can You start by not replying her anymore when She starts?

LadySarah:


Stop this .

Stop wha?

missjo:

And what is the difference between six and half-a-dozen? Lmao

Man you killing me, you're always killing me

As long as you don't die on me.

That phrase is just a saying meant to convey seriousness.

crackhaus:

I am really glad you shared this. I am glad NOT because it corroborates my comments, but because you just showed that your intuition is still very much fine-tuned.

The issue now is a simple one because it's just a case of what are you going to do at this point?
Do you want to save your marriage and get it back to a place of total peace and fidelity, or do you believe it is too far gone to be salvaged?

The reason why I deliberately ignored that whole story about how you summoned her to get back home just to cook your meal, was because that isn't the main issue.
Even though majority of the posters here chose to fixate on that bit, it was obvious to me that the only reason you would be so inconsiderate as to order her back home to serve your food, was an attempt to show you still had some kind of power over her. And when a man starts to do odd things in a bid to assert control over his wife, then the issues between them runs far deeper.

Now to the original question in your topic, the answer is NO, you can and MUST NOT tolerate all that nonsense from your wife. Her continuous threats and misbehaviour have gone on for so long because you allowed it.
Tell her that you have had quite enough of the threats and that she should pray fervently to her God for you not to find any hard evidence that she has been cheating on you, else she will find out the difference between six and half-a-dozen.

Also, you have to stop exchanging words with her or making degrading comments about her looks.

If you noticed, I have not suggested you directly accuse her of cheating or advocated any form of separation between you two.
This is because, since you have had the suspicion for so long but made no move to get any evidence, then you probably can remain married. Just caution her as I stated above.

Cheers.

I have made several move to at least see that my instincts were through, but then I found out at a time that she was already having an affair with a guy but not too sure if they have gone as far as having sex, i even created a thread here on family section about 2 years ago. She already figured out all the ways I used to track her. So i just dont bother myself any,ore

I might be wrong on this assertion but I have to voice out what I think.

The more I read all what op is writing, the more I think that this story might be fictitious.. it lacks nuclear family originality, orientations and flavour.. let it not be that he is just leading the readers on..

Reading between the lines, the write up has the quality of someone that is still single, no children involved, unlike someone that was married for 7yrs with kids.. Anyone that studied a bit of literature and understands it will agree with me that most of the time, it's not about what was written but what wasn't.. and I won't say more of what wasn't.. just leaving it for the reader to make their choice.

Lastly No sane respectable responsible married man would graphically describe his wife's sexual dealings like that. Even some that were into boyfriend and girlfriend relationship that respects their partners cannot even go into details when talking about the 'place' his supposed children were incubated before coming to this world. That's pure disrespectful to the children if this guy is truly married.. Maybe I'm being old fashioned but anyways
I apologise if this is real. I'm done here.

crackhaus:

Someone is expressing himself regarding suspicions of his wife's infidelity and this viral infection is typing total nonsense about respect & strangers.
What's the connection?

You must definitely be a cheat as well for that comment to be causing you discomfort.

But that's the truth. The OP lacks discretion and maturity even in his words. Just completely washing his dirty linens outside without no caution whatsoever.