I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

Don't tell him. Even after child birth, don't tell him. If you do, he will feel manipulated and his perspective towards you will change and also the love will reduce wella. If later in future he finds out, Blame it on the the doctor that did the first test . Afterall, Abraham lied that Sarah na his sister in other to avoid trouble


By the way, your description says that you are truly AS. Because one of the ways to know them is that they hardly fall sick (Malaria) and they are resistant to cold. Go and do another test somewhere else

Fountainofyouth:



Mister man, be guided, Abraham lied to the King and everyone around but not to his wife, this evil woman want to keep something vital and important from her would be husband, so where is the correlation here? Why would you tell her not to tell him? How would you feel if this happens to you or your relatives and siblings?

Calm down and take a chill pill, He is AA and both of them can work.

Let op try not to make lying part of her

you should have told him long time ago since he is AA it's medically recommended for you guys to marry..

now you risk losing hm if you tell him.... for lack of trust..

I hope you don't have another man's pregnancy you are taking into the marriage..

Tell him now

Or

Forever keep your silence.

But


One day you will be sick and in hospital and a test will be done

And

It will show SS.



Now that will be betrayal and heart break and most importantly he will hate and distaste you.


So I will tell you to tell him

damilare214:
I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

This is very risky.
You want to build your marriage on the foundation of lies ?

damilare214:
I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

You've gotten yourself into trouble already. Isn't it ironic that a man who ought to be your best friend is missing out in this while strangers know already?

Sadly, you already built the foundation of your relationship on falsehood and deceived an innocent person just because you thought he wouldn't stay if he found out the truth.

You should have told him the truth from the get-go. It is possible he could have remained with you despite the revelation but keeping it this long is already a bother. In the end, you just might have yourself drawn into an unnecessary meeting between both families over something you could have let out long ago.

Plus, I'm wondering why he believed you without a proper check at a laboratory or a hospital. Religious houses mandate this stuff to prevent stories that touch the heart later in the nearest future. So, save you are atheists, it should have been a part of the tests you did, if at all you did any. The issue of and STD/STI and geno tests ought to be the next step after any conviction.

A possible scenario of what will play out:

1. Tell him before the wedding and he might call of the wedding.
2. Tell him before the wedding and he might accept you for you are and pretend like it isn't an issue (very rare but possible).
3. Tell him on your wedding night and the trust he has for you is laid to rest from that night even if he decides to stay with.
4. Tell him on your wedding night and that ends the union as it is built in lies and falsehood. His family will most likely support him if it escalates.

Being an SS isn't a plague and it isn't a crime. You would have had your peace of mind if you came out clean from the very beginning but you didn't which presents you as selfish. Either way, it's safe to say you're in trouble. Whatever the outcome will be, trust as essential ingredient will fly out the window after he finds out. Medical issues shouldn't be withheld from a would-be partner.

You're SS, you're not on any drugs and you don't fall sick.
I think you should try the test again.

Let's hope your husband is able to forgive, what you did is not nice to your unborn kids. I pray he does

Na wa ohh.


So your friends know and over a million nairalanders are also getting to Know what your husband to be doesn't know.

Fear women mbok

Mood11:
Na wa ohh.


So your friends know and over a million nairalanders are also getting to Know what your husband to be doesn't know.

Fear women mbok

Not to look like a gender ish, I strongly feel guys should pay attention to who their woman divulge information to. It's the same way some readily feed strangers with sensitive information about their lives in the name of an e-dairy while the person they're with is as clueless as Jon Snow.

Sanchez01:

Not to look like a gender ish, I strongly feel guys should pay attention to who their woman divulge information to. It's the same way some readily feed strangers with sensitive information about their lives in the name of an e-dairy while the person they're with is as clueless as Jon Snow.

My brother this one perplexed me o

Tell him,if he loves you he will stand by you after all he is AS

damilare214:
I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

Between the devil and the deep blue sea innit?

Whatever you do, don't tell him after the marriage.

You are not giving him a choice to decide.

Rosarie:
Tell him,if he loves you he will stand by you after all he is AS

Don't you think the guy would feel betrayed?

This isn't about the guy's love (they are getting married) however her betrayal.

See them. That was how my brother's wife lied. My brother is AS. Because she wanted to marry by force she said she's AA. They went for tests it showed SS and AS for her and my brother. She said their machine is bad and went to another hospital where they have an insider. There they gave them AA for her and AS for my brother. My parents said he shouldn't go ahead with the marriage but they insisted. Now they've have finally gotten married abi? What now happened?

They gave birth to SS
Everyday her and the child are both in and out of the hospital. No savings, no happiness, no Joy. Everyday siki siki. She's siking the baby is siking. My brother is longing mouth and squeezing face

One time both of them had crises at the same time, my mum now used the opportunity to confirm their genotype because she didn't understand why everyday they are always sick. Lo and behold, mother SS. Child SS. We confronted her she was still denying and we showed her the results she started crying.

We are looking.


See ehn. God will not forgive you if your bring another SS child into this world. God will not forgive you if your end up dying on the road and making your husband a widower halfway because you lied.

In fact for even thinking about lying you're a terrible person.

Bye

Rosarie:
Tell him,if he loves you he will stand by you after all he is AS

This isn't about love. Why do some of think it must be the Telemundo ish? The idea of being betrayed and lied to over something as sensitive as this will leave any man wondering. You should be more concerned about how he'll see her if he finds out.

Evil woman, tell him the truth before you marry him, why will you want to keep something so huge from him? I always advice people to ask and do tests for genotype and other things before becoming romantically involved, tell him the fvcking truth...

damilare214:
I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

I thought most churches these days have a wedding planning/counselling committe that mandates intending couples to do the necessary tests before they are allowed to wed?

That aside, that man loves you so much that he's taking your word and not seeking to run any tests on his own - there are even fertility tests that ought to be done.

Don't insult his love by hiding this very important information from him.

Donald95:
Don't tell him. Even after child birth, don't tell him. If you do, he will feel manipulated and his perspective towards you will change and also the love will reduce wella. If later in future he finds out, Blame it on the the doctor that did the first test . Afterall, Abraham lied that Sarah na his sister in other to avoid trouble


By the way, your description says that you are truly AS. Because one of the ways to know them is that they hardly fall sick (Malaria) and they are resistant to cold. Go and do another test somewhere else

Mister man, be guided, Abraham lied to the King and everyone around but not to his wife, this evil woman want to keep something vital and important from her would be husband, so where is the correlation here? Why would you tell her not to tell him? How would you feel if this happens to you or your relatives and siblings?

If he's truly yours, it won't be a problem. None of your kids will be ss so I see no big deal.

abelswife:
See them. That was how my brother's wife lied. My brother is AS. Because she wanted to marry by force she said she's AA. They went for tests it showed SS and AS for her and my brother. She said their machine is bad and went to another hospital where they have an insider. There they gave them AA for her and AS for my brother. My parents said he shouldn't go ahead with the marriage but they insisted. Now they've have finally gotten married abi? What now happened?

They gave birth to SS
Everyday her and the child are both in and out of the hospital. No savings, no happiness, no Joy. Everyday siki siki. She's siking the baby is siking. My brother is longing mouth and squeezing face

One time both of them had crises at the same time, my mum now used the opportunity to confirm their genotype because she didn't understand why everyday they are always sick. Lo and behold, mother SS. Child SS. We confronted her she was still denying and we showed her the results she started crying.

We are looking.


See ehn. God will not forgive you if your bring another SS child into this world. God will not forgive you if your end up dying on the road and making your husband a widower halfway because you lied.

In fact for even thinking about lying you're a terrible person.

Bye

So sorry about your experience.

Fountainofyouth:



Mister man, be guided, Abraham lied to the King and everyone around but not to his wife, this evil woman want to keep something vital and important from her would be husband, so where is the correlation here? Why would you tell her not to tell him? How would you feel if this happens to you or your relatives and siblings?

Fountainofyouth:
Evil woman, tell him the truth before you marry him, why will you want to keep something so huge from him? I always advice people to ask and do tests for genotype and other things before becoming romantically involved, tell him the fvcking truth...

Interesting

You are quite passionate about this topic.

Speaking from experience?

abelswife:
See them. That was how my brother's wife lied. My brother is AS. Because she wanted to marry by force she said she's AA. They went for tests it showed SS and AS for her and my brother. She said their machine is bad and went to another hospital where they have an insider. There they gave them AA for her and AS for my brother. My parents said he shouldn't go ahead with the marriage but they insisted. Now they've have finally gotten married abi? What now happened?

They gave birth to SS
Everyday her and the child are both in and out of the hospital. No savings, no happiness, no Joy. Everyday siki siki. She's siking the baby is siking. My brother is longing mouth and squeezing face

One time both of them had crises at the same time, my mum now used the opportunity to confirm their genotype because she didn't understand why everyday they are always sick. Lo and behold, mother SS. Child SS. We confronted her she was still denying and we showed her the results she started crying.

We are looking.


See ehn. God will not forgive you if your bring another SS child into this world. God will not forgive you if your end up dying on the road and making your husband a widower halfway because you lied.

In fact for even thinking about lying you're a terrible person.

Bye

Wow!

Are they still married?

abelswife:
See them. That was how my brother's wife lied. My brother is AS. Because she wanted to marry by force she said she's AA. They went for tests it showed SS and AS for her and my brother. She said their machine is bad and went to another hospital where they have an insider. There they gave them AA for her and AS for my brother. My parents said he shouldn't go ahead with the marriage but they insisted. Now they've have finally gotten married abi? What now happened?

They gave birth to SS
Everyday her and the child are both in and out of the hospital. No savings, no happiness, no Joy. Everyday siki siki. She's siking the baby is siking. My brother is longing mouth and squeezing face

One time both of them had crises at the same time, my mum now used the opportunity to confirm their genotype because she didn't understand why everyday they are always sick. Lo and behold, mother SS. Child SS. We confronted her she was still denying and we showed her the results she started crying.

We are looking.


See ehn. God will not forgive you if your bring another SS child into this world. God will not forgive you if your end up dying on the road and making your husband a widower halfway because you lied.

In fact for even thinking about lying you're a terrible person.

Bye

This man in question is AA but she should tell him now to avoid unnecessary frictions later.

AwkaetitiBabe:
If he's truly yours, it won't be a problem . None of your kids will be ss so I see no big deal.

@bold:

What of thing is this?

This love we are parroting, does it go one way?

As in if she loved him, would she have lied to him?

[s]

abelswife:
See them. That was how my brother's wife lied. My brother is AS. Because she wanted to marry by force she said she's AA. They went for tests it showed SS and AS for her and my brother. She said their machine is bad and went to another hospital where they have an insider. There they gave them AA for her and AS for my brother. My parents said he shouldn't go ahead with the marriage but they insisted. Now they've have finally gotten married abi? What now happened?

They gave birth to SS
Everyday her and the child are both in and out of the hospital. No savings, no happiness, no Joy. Everyday siki siki. She's siking the baby is siking. My brother is longing mouth and squeezing face

One time both of them had crises at the same time, my mum now used the opportunity to confirm their genotype because she didn't understand why everyday they are always sick. Lo and behold, mother SS. Child SS. We confronted her she was still denying and we showed her the results she started crying.

We are looking.


See ehn. God will not forgive you if your bring another SS child into this world. God will not forgive you if your end up dying on the road and making your husband a widower halfway because you lied.

In fact for even thinking about lying you're a terrible person.

Bye

[/s]
This your comment is very insensitive.
What is the guarantee that you'll live longer than her, or your brother's wife ?
Nonsense!

bukatyne:

@bold:

What of thing is this?

This love we are parroting, does it go one way?

As in if she loved him, would she have lied to him?

She didn't lie but withholding information. Yes, people in love Lie to keep that love.

damilare214:
I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

You have options....option 1)keep quite....your kids are going to come out AS so that shouldn't be a problem...
2) tell him and brace for the worst.....
3) you tell him and hopefully find out he did not lie about his genotype.

AwkaetitiBabe:
She didn't lie but withholding information. Yes, people in love Lie to keep that love.

She did lie and said she was As instead of SS.

If you genuinely love someone (operative word = genuinely), you would lay all your cards on the table and let them take you for who you are.

If on the other hand you saw the person as a suitable suitor (looks, cash, sex, body, position, fame, family etc.), you would scheme (lie, kill, jazz etc.) to make them yours.

bukatyne:

@bold:

What of thing is this?

This love we are parroting, does it go one way?

As in if she loved him, would she have lied to him?

I didn’t want to comment before but it’s annoying to see people talking about love here. I mean how in the world do you keep something that could make or destroy your future from someone you claim to love?

Who said if she had told he truth, the man wouldn’t have stayed with her. I wouldn’t blame the man if after knowing he decides to call off the marriage or maybe divorce her if it happens after their marriage. I mean, more than love, trust is very essential in a relationship. I’m very sure if the man gets to know, the trust he has for her would go down just like that and I don’t know what can restore it.

If she had told him, she has a very fat chance of the man staying with her, especially since he’s AA but right now even if the man didn’t leave, I’m not sure he won’t doubt any word that comes out of her mouth.

Mariangeles:

This your comment is very insensitive.
What is the guarantee that you'll live longer than her, or your brother's wife ?
Nonsense!

Insensitive?

Have you ever seen SS crisis?

The resources wasted (time, money, emotions, strength etc) because they are just maintaining the person not curing?

It is witchcraft for an SS person to scheme to marry AS not even AA.

She knew she was SS, didn't work with the hospital so she can get AS babies.

Her comment is not insensitive. You do not know what the wife's lies has cost that family.

The MIL is probably the one staying with them when they have the crisis for her to have access to do tests for them.

What if she has her business? It would probably suffer.

queenitee:

I didn’t want to comment before but it’s annoying to see people talking about love here. I mean how in the world do you keep something that could make or destroy your future from someone you claim to love?

Who said if she had told he truth, the man wouldn’t have stayed with her. I wouldn’t blame the man if after knowing he decides to call off the marriage or maybe divorce her if it happens after their marriage. I mean, more than love, trust is very essential in a relationship. I’m very sure if the man gets to know, the trust he has for her would go down just like that and I don’t know what can restore it.

If she had told him, she has a very fat chance of the man staying with her, especially since he’s AA but right now even if the man didn’t leave, I’m not sure he won’t doubt any word that comes out of her mouth.

Very true.

Last I remembered, love is not selfish.