This post is +18. Please, stop reading to avoid feeling upset.

I'm going to tell you the main reasons most women love me.

1. Because I'm stingy
2. Because I'm honest
3. Because I'm naughty
4. Because I'm funny
5. Because I don't need women

In this post, I'll tell a story with a certain girl and how I got her wet effortlessly by applying the above 5 things on the list. It all started in...


Typing...

It all started in November, 2019. The first day I met her at a friend's place with her friend, she was on a black leggings and the shape of the ass I saw was too big.

Though, since she was tall, it looked good on her. The moment I turned, my eyes went straight to her pink lips (I love to kiss).

Sadly, she was looking moody. As a guy man, I ignored her — no time for moods. Deep down, I wouldn't mind being the engineer that'll repair her socket.

That day faded, but 3 days later, I met her again in that compound. Since I'm the king of bolé and fish, I gave 1k to someone to go get me some bolé and fish.

The pretty lady and her friend followed my messenger to the joint since I know her friend and always playful with her.

The bolé arrived and we all eat together. "You girls are allowed to be shy and eat with swag, but for me, I'm a village man, so I eat without swag." "Swag ke," replied her friend.

"So, which name should I call you, Trouble or Troublesome?" I asked the fat ass girl laughed, then and she told me her name. Starting from that day, I...



Typing...

Starting from that day, I began to tease her as I slowly sneaked into naughty tease. Two days later, since I regularly visit the place for 2 — 4 hours per day, she became addicted to my personality — which are the 5 things I listed above.

I woo women without wooing them. This is to say, I talk 90% of the time with body language not with words.

"Legend, give us money to go buy bolé at the junction," her friend requested while she was around, but I said, "As I stingy like this? You never start. A broke and jobless man like me? Where me and money meet?" I said and they laughed.

It was always fun. We were in the same room with the fat as girl and when her friend left us, I went for a kiss, but she dodged it.

In my mind, I said, "So, this girl dodged my kiss? I'm going to press her ESCOFi mumu buttons and she's going to be madly in love and she'll beg for my kiss and I'll tell her to pay."

That day ended with lots of teasing and naughty talk. She was gradually catching fire. The next day, I wanted to whisper something in her ear, but ended up launching a kiss and I could see goosebumps all over her body.

I stopped and told her to pay me for the kiss, but the laughed and asked me how much? But I didn't reply.

I grabbed her and spanked her ass twice and she loved it, but pretended as if she wants to run away from me. I laughed and told her not to come close to me again that she is a bad girl blah blah blah.

Whenever I call her a good girl, she'll say she isn't a good girl, but a bad girl. Also, whenever I call her a bad girl, she'll say she isn't a bad girl, but a good girl.

When we are in groups, we made lots of naughty eye contacts without a word to avoid people knowing what was going on — secret love.

As I was leaving that day, she tried to kiss me, but I dodged the kiss and told her to pay before she'll be allowed. (Women love challenge — they love what is hard to get). In the morning, at 6:20 AM, I...


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In the morning, at 6:20 AM, I saw a message on in caps saying:

GOOD MORNING.

I WANTED TO TELL YOU THIS YESTERDAY, BUT I WAS TOO SHY TO AND I KNOW IT'S SOMEHOW BUT I JUST HAVE TO LET YOU KNOW BEFORE IT'S LATE. I DREAM ABOUT YOU EVERYDAY. I HAVE FALLEN FOR YOU — TOO BAD I CAN'T CONTROL IT — Her_Name_Removed.

I didn't reply her because she sent the message through her friend's phone since her expensive phone got damaged and she doesn't have a small phone.

Two days, I didn't go to the house. On the 3rd day, I went and she was excited and at the same time angry for not checking on her for two good days.

She tried to play with me, but I told her to pay before she'll be allowed to play with me. "Everything about you is pay pay pay. If you're a gigolo only politicians wives can be able to afford you," she angrily said. "Of course, you think I'm free," I replied and she smiled.

"This one you want to seduce me with your pointed nîpples," I said while inside the room and she shyly covered them with her two hands and said, "I don't like wearing bra at home. So, your eyes don go there already? Bad boy." 

"Of course, that is what I'm born to do. When you get married, your children go enjoy o! Sucking all these big nîpples," I said and she laughed and hit my shoulder.

"This girl get sense. All these beating you dey beat me na indirect way to tell me to suck them — lie lie it won't work, you have to pay me sucking fee."

She couldn't hold her laughter, so she removed her hands covering her shy nîpples and came to beat me as she constantly calls me a naughty and corrupt guy.

After the fun fight, she laid on the bed with the small wrapper on her waist and her blue short sleeveless dress. She is truly endowed in all angles — face, brain, height, ass, breast, hard nîpples, shyness, playfulness, etc.

"Lie by my side," she commanded. "So that you'll rape me and later tell the world I did it — lie lie, you can't Bisola me," I chimed in and she laaaaaaughed and said you're too funny.

"See as you don make my dîck hard," I said as I traced the outline of the shape. She turned, since she was facing the wall while on the bed and smiled, then repeated herself, "Lie by my side, please."

I know she wants to tap current — women who travel and conji are like 5&6. Anyway, I laid by her side as my hard rod rubs on her fat ass.

I crossed my hand on her and we started talking random things. I was explaining something and before I could say the word, she said, "Adrenaline."

"Wow! So, you're this intelligent?" I said. "Duh, I'm a graduate," she replied. Wow! I'm impressed because a great man once said, "Beauty without brain, na the toto dey suffer."

She burst into the loudest laughter I have ever heard in weeks, turned and tried to kiss me, but I refused her kissing me. "The quote is right though," she agreed. Yes, it is, Robert Mugabe said it.

Since we were still lying on the bed, I breathe on her neck with my warm and naughty breath and she shivered.

I drew her ear to my mouth to whisper something, but it was ticklish, so she tried to push me as she giggles. "Wait, I won't tickle you," I said.

Okay, tell me. "I know the color of the panties you're wearing," I whispered. "It's a lie," she disagreed. "Okay, tell me the color if you do," she asked.

"I studied Pantology in school — so it's black," I said and she laughed and said, "Wait, how did you know?" "Because that is what I read in school." Our conversations was...


Typing...

Our conversation was raw and funny. Though, I was the one saying most of the naughty things while she was the one doing the laughing and body teasing.

I grabbed her head again and breathe on her sensitive neck as I whispered to her, "Imagine my d*** deep inside your tight little p****."

The sound of my relaxed whispering voice sent goosebumps down her spine again and she forcefully turned and grabbed me for a hot French kiss.

I slowly started moving my hand down down down and she was dripping w**. As I was getting too close to her center of gravity, she held my hand to stop me and said, "The door is open."

I stood with my rod poking through my Chinos to close it. Yes, I didn't lock, but close. Some minutes later, one of my friend's nephew walked in and I told him to go buy bolé and fish, apple, groundnut, banana, and watermelon.

He bought everything and the 3 of us ate. Yes, I only ate the bolé and fish and left the other ones. The nephew left and went to the kitchen.

"Those days I didn't come here, I missed you," I said. "You, missed who? You didn't miss me. If you missed me you would've called or sent a text," she countered.

"But you don't have a phone," I countered. "You should've at least called via my friend's phone or your friend's nephew's phone," she reiterated.

"I don't like 3rd party wahala," I replied. "Anyway, I don't want things to move too fast before I break your heart — you know I'm a heartbreaker," I said and she kept quiet, then after some seconds, said, "Yes, I know."

We had lots of meaningful conversations, family-related talk, and lots of naughty/funny ones as well.

"You're not the demanding type, I like that about you,"  I said and she smiled and said, "Who told you?"

"I told myself. In fact, even if you're the demanding type, I'm the stingy type — demanding women can't even squeeze out 1k from me," I said and she laughed.

"No, I'm serious — I don't waste money on dating — I keep the money for whoever I'll marry." "Hmm, your wife will be really lucky," she said.

"You're right, she will be really lucky just the same way your boyfriend will be really lucky if you buy him one of my dating books." "Haha. Then I'm going to buy you one of your books," she said.

"Do you know why the two of us have been talking for more than 4 hours since I came here and never ran out of things to say?"

"No, I don't," she replied. "I opened my phone and showed her the cover of one of my books called Female-Sextapes and told her to buy her boyfriend the book.

We bantered back and forth, then I said, "You didn't even call me those days I didn't come here." Before I could finish my sentence, my friend's nephew, J, walked in and said, "Hmm. She disturbs me everyday about you and asks me when you're coming to the house."

He picked the remnant of the things we ate to dispose and as he was walking out, I said, "I think there are phones that cost 3 — 5k, right?"

"Yes," the two of them simultaneously answered. I opened my wallet and gave her 3k to get one of those small phones and use, but she refused to take the money.

"I want you to buy it with your hand," she said. The reason she said this is because she wants it to look like a gift — women love gifts from the guys they love despite how cheap or small it is.

From the guys they don't love, they want the money cash. The heat in the room was much despite the fan, so I said, "With the rate of heat in this country this November, you people will wake one day and won't see me in the country again."

"Make una remember me o! After una wedding make una put me for bag carry me go abroad when una dey travel — I don taya for this country too," said J as all of us laughed to his funny statement. J walked out and we continued with the conversation. During this long and fun chitchat, now at 8 PM, a...

Typing...

During this long and fun chitchat, now at 8 PM, a client who wants to buy one of my books called Lasticle messaged on WhatsApp and I told her to attend to him as I direct her on what to type.

"If you end up as one of my wives, you'll be doing this to generate feeding money, so you better learn it now," I said and she smiled.

(Before that day, she had gone through my gallery and had seen all my book covers and was always looking at me with a dirty smile when she saw those naughty covers).

"The money this client will pay is what I'll use in buying you that cheap Chinco phone," I said and she smiled and said okay. "Let me start teaching you how to sell books in case you end up as my 7th wife," I said and she frowned and hit my shoulder.

"So, choose one — do you want to be my first wife or my 7th wife?" I asked but she refused to reply. "Anyway, we are just friends," I said and she looked at me and said, "Yes, we are just friends." Deep down, I know she wants more than friends. I have already pressed the dangerous love buttons that make women fall madly in love. Below is the screenshot of the transaction she handled.


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"Remember, I'm not the type of guy who calls or picks calls a lot," I said again and she frowned and said if I won't call her or pick her call, then there is no need buying the phone that she will prefer to stay without a phone and she'll be traveling back very soon.

As we were talking, another lady called me, but I didn't pick. She called again, yet I didn't pick. "Do you know who is calling me?" I asked her.

"She's my sixth wife," I replied and she smiled. She called again and I picked and started teasing her and talking naughty things.

The conversation I was having on phone was fun, just as all my convos with woment are. When the call ended, I noticed she was jealous.

As a good-bad guy, I started singing, "I'm getting jealous, don't wanna see you with anybody o, I'm getting jealous already o!"

She burst into laughter with how I changed my pitch and rendered the song with a funny voice. 

"I'm not jealous," she replied. "If I hear," I countered. Deep down, my new princess was angry.

Yes, there was no sex despite all the smooching and touching we had because I don't need it and also, it's not my room or house.

Even if it was my room/house, I would still overcome. As someone who loves to write and turn every story to book, then to money, I love the journey love, the romance, and affection in relationship, not the pam pam pam pam cum and sleep. To a wise man, story = money.

When I wanted to leave, she refused. She begged me to sleep over in that compound.

If you want a woman to love you more than she loves anyone, be great in bed, be dramatic, but withhold sex.

Tease a woman with the tip of your d***, but don't fûck her and watch her cry and beg you. Oh, I didn't even tell you I gave her a back massage. When I invite her over, I'll use massage oil and give her the best massage on earth.

"Do you like massage?" I asked. "Oh my God, I love it," she excited reply. Truly, massage is therapeutic and as I man,  I love massage too.

That girl is forever in love, but I have warned her to be careful with me because I'm a bloody heartbreaker.

I can make people love me, I don't love people because people are wicked. One day, I pray to learn how to love.

I'm emotionless, but not heartless. My heart can't be broken by a woman. No be person wey put him heart for relationship na him in heart go break? Love less, worry less. Love more, worry more. Invest your money in business, not in relationship. Yes, the 3k to 5k phone is normal thing I do for people I don't even know, so I don't see that as a big deal. So, today, I'll...


Typing...

So, today, 28th of November, I'll send someone to go buy the cheap 3k — 5k phone. Now, it's 100% obvious I'm truly stingy with my money and with my d***.

LESSON:

Sex is free.

Real men don't pay for sex.

Real men don't buy women things to impress.

Real men are not needy or desperate to f**k. Even if a real man's d*** rises, he can control it and not put it in all holes he sees.

Real men are honest and sincere.

Real men make women fall madly in love by pressing her ESCOFi buttons.
Real men are good-bad guys.

Real mean don't care if they lose or win because it's always a win for them even if they lose. (Even if I choose not to f*** her, which is probably what I'll do, I can easily turn the story to a book — just as I did with the book called The Naughty Tiger. Yes, when she was going through my gallery, she saw that cover and I told her it's an erotîc romance book and she said she LOVES such books. Women and naughty books are like 5&6. Now I know why 50 Shades of Grey sold like wildfire.)



Typing...

If you're a man, I hope you've learned something from this post. If you're a woman, I'm sorry, you didn't learn anything from this.

For me, what I learned is: even if your d*** rises, you have the power to make it shrink. Also, don't help a woman in exchange for sex or relationship — sex is free and relationship is free — only marriage isn't.

So, help her because she deserves help, not because you want to benefit something at the end.

Baba iLegendd, I want to be like you when I grow up

wahala

ilegendd doing big things

SirDanny7:
ilegendd doing big things

The funny BIG THING is: Some clients don't know I'm doing book promo this Black Friday. That same yesterday, someone bought that Lasticle book on my site for 10k while others are getting it for just 5k on promo.

I wanted to tell him about the promo and refund him 5k, but realized 10k isn't even much.

iLegendd:


The funny thing is: some clients don't know I'm doing book promo. That same yesterday, someone bought that Lasticle book on my site for 10k while others are getting it for just 5k.

I wanted to tell him about the promo and refund him 5k, but realized 10k isn't even much.

10k is not much so can i get it then

SirDanny7:

10k is not much so can i get it then

Lol.

I mean, 10k is too small for what is contained in the book and how effective it is. Meaning: people are supposed to pay more.

Since we are on 50% promo, you can get it for 5k — which is 50% off.

Visit this page for contact details: https://www.nairaland.com/5538063/cheap-get-books-black-friday

spirul77:
wahala

No be small wahala.

iLegendd:


Lol.

I mean, 10k is too small for what is contained in the book and how effective it is. Meaning: people are supposed to pay more.

Since we are on 50% promo, you can get it for 5k — which is 50% off.

Visit this page for contact details: https://www.nairaland.com/5538063/cheap-get-books-black-friday

iPass:
Baba iLegendd, I want to be like you when I grow up

You already big pass me. Na me go want be like you.

baba iLegend, your boy sight u

I bought two cheap phones and delivered them to her to choose one. One left — make I look for who I go dash that one.

So, that's the end of the movie. If you want to get the full gist from day one to pregnancy day, then let me know and I'll write a romance book about it.

Keep your money ready.

Tony142:
baba iLegend, your boy sight u

You're welcome, the real chairman of women's affair.

iLegendd:
I bought two cheap phones and delivered them to her to choose one. One left — make I look for who I go dash that one.

So, that's the end of the movie. If you want to get the full gist from day one to pregnancy day, then let me know and I'll write a romance book about it.

Keep your money ready.

How much did you buy the phones

Lightway:

How much did you buy the phones

Cheap.

Such lies. You honestly want us to believe you spanked a woman's ass days after you met her? Haba.

Modenine (M9) once said that "he has his private part well covered). I wish men realised how priceless their d!ck are. Some men have faulty emotions. I urge such men to read ur kind of books. It'd be healthy for them.
Anyway, nice write-up

iLegendd:


You're welcome, the real chairman of women's affair.

. Lol

iRepNaija1:
Such lies. You honestly want us to believe you spanked a woman's ass days after you met her? Haba.

When I see comments like this, I cry. Most men are backward in anything relationship.

Let me tell you something: the difference between billionaires and suffer-naires is the the word "dare."

Billionaires dare, but suffer-naires don't dare. They are afraid of everything. They are afraid to succeed, they are afraid to fail.

Billionaires are not afraid to succeed and at the same time are not afraid to fail.

If you can succeed with women, marriage, or dating, you can succeed in any business. Seeing my post as unattainable (a lie) is just the same way as seeing a unique business idea as unattainable or a lie.

A confident man will tell you giving a speech in public is so fun and can't wait to do it again, but a nervous man will shout, "God forbid! I rather die than give a speech in front of thousands or millions of people."

I hope you see the picture.

I no go lie, make i jus talk ma mind.
Is it just me or does anyone else has hatred toward this guy's post??

I mean WTF. no one employed you, to cm and be telling us your life nd blah blah shit.

Thank you Oga, we don't need it.

Ahdunns:
I no go lie, make i jus talk ma mind.
Is it just me or does anyone else has hatred toward this guy's post??

I mean WTF. no one employed you, to cm and be telling us your life nd blah blah shit.

Thank you Oga, we don't need it.

Unfortunately, I'll be posting more.

Three options for you.

1. Ignore and get a life (we all know you're depressed and suicidal — sorry eh, God will see you through)
2. Read and enjoy
3. Read and cry

You chose option 3, so how is that my business?

Hahaha. As long as you're depressed on my matter, I'm happy. Sniper is cheap just like your opinion. #Smile.

What's this??

Ahdunns:
I no go lie, make i jus talk ma mind.
Is it just me or does anyone else has hatred toward this guy's post??

I mean WTF. no one employed you, to cm and be telling us your life nd blah blah shit.

Thank you Oga, we don't need it.

shut the fûçk up

speak for your self