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Is My Reply To A Lady Question Not Too Harsh? / How Did You Know Your Girlfriend Was Having Sex With Someone Else / Ungrateful Girlfriend Was Not Happy With Her Valentine Gift, Scatters Everywhere (2) (3) (4)
Re: . by Nobody: 7:40am On Nov 29, 2019 |
That she has to seek your permission before going out is ridiculous. That you broke up w| her b|c she wanted to spend the night at her girlfriend's place is even more ridiculous. You sound like a control freak and you did her a favour by breaking up with her. What rubbish. GeneralShepherd:You're the only one who has asked OP this important question. Thank you for having sense. 4 Likes 1 Share |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 7:45am On Nov 29, 2019 |
theButterfly: I did not say seek my permission. I said let me know that she is going out. She is free to go anywhere. Just as I am free to. I never complain about where she goes to. Just keep communication and I do exactly the same. 1 Like |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 7:46am On Nov 29, 2019 |
theButterfly: I am going to my friend's place and I have decided to pass a night. Is that too hard to tell a boyfriend? |
Re: . by GeneralShepherd(m): 7:51am On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe: Unless you live together, which it is only fair to tell your partner you won't be coming home. Otherwise, I don't think it's a big deal that is if you don't live together 1 Like |
Re: . by cRobo: 8:34am On Nov 29, 2019 |
Guy hustle and forget about women and focus on yourself women go find you 3 Likes |
Re: . by DonEd(m): 8:52am On Nov 29, 2019 |
This is simply "inferiority complex". Already, u consider urself no longer good enough financially hence ur insecurity has set in. If u knew u were right, u why seeking opinions? See! Marriage and relationships is pitching ur tent with a stranger. You just have to choose one with lesser evil. 1 Like |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 9:09am On Nov 29, 2019 |
DonEd: If I knew I was right, I would not be seeking various opinions. I am always willing to learn and grow, if I see where I defaulted. The idea of a lesser evil is nice. Reminds me of Jerry Springer's show Baggage. Either way, thank you. |
Re: . by Martinez39(m): 9:13am On Nov 29, 2019 |
You did the right thing. Relationship is supposed to be two-sided, once it becomes one-sided then the relationship isn't worth it. No love is better than one-sided love. As a man, if you see that your girlfriend is misbehaving and isn't putting efforts into making the relationship work, discard her as soon as possible. 5 Likes |
Re: . by Martinez39(m): 9:14am On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe:You don't have to respond to every idiot on nairaland neither do you have to prove anything to anybody. 2 Likes |
Re: . by davidadenrele: 9:30am On Nov 29, 2019 |
Hello, You want my advice get a job, work on yourself, have plans, and goals, dream big fine babe with all the features will not think twice for your attention ladies dont worth the stress to die over sometimes, yes true love exists no doubt what keeps the true love going is "MONEY" its obvious she has began to see you as a burden, due to present state of challenges even when she should have shown genuine understanding its really hard keeping a serious relationship especially when its the girl that's pushing to managed things emotions will often go a hey wire sometime, dont be afraid and be too hard on yourself for quitting the relationship afterall you are the man you have your pride intact where you got it wrong is taken a quick decision when you are angry for now let her be, pray hard go get a job all will be well in no time if she's yours she will come back if she's not yours a better person with good intention to stay will come around.!! All the best Bro. 4 Likes |
Re: . by Daviva007(m): 10:00am On Nov 29, 2019 |
Realonekingsley:nothing,they are always at loss 2 Likes |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 10:41am On Nov 29, 2019 |
davidadenrele: Thank you. Very nice. I have a job but where we had problem was I had another source of income from another company to complement my salary. So this extra source gave us a lot of leverage to leave a bit flamboyantly. Unfortunately, I lost that extra source and our lifestyle reduced. However, I still bear most of the burden while I source to get my contacts to plug back the extra source. Pointed noted. |
Re: . by pocohantas(f): 10:54am On Nov 29, 2019 |
Let them continue to deceive you. Break up just because of this issue or another? Small issue that can be worked on, before reaching a final conclusion. It is like you don't know what is going on. Your eye go soon clear after 1 week. Reality will set in, by then they have all moved on to the next topic. Every guy is tough and no-nonsense on NL. Toor!! 1 Like |
Re: . by GeneralShepherd(m): 11:44am On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe: If you need your partner to check in with you all the time then something is wrong with YOU. You should learn to trust your partner or breakup if she isn't trustworthy |
Re: . by pryme(m): 1:59pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe: How long have you guys been without communication, and has she contacted you since then to find out why the sudden change? |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 2:12pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
pryme: She called this morning and afternoon letting me know her movements. Like hinting that she has taking correction but I am not buying it. |
Re: . by Gaspardd(m): 2:24pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe:You re just a broke pùssy asß bìtch full of himself, who re u to tell her what to do? Is she your wife...u guys arent in a covenant, you re just in a relate-tionship. Bomboclàt |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 2:39pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
Gaspardd: Meaning of Relationship the way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected. |
Re: . by Gaspardd(m): 2:49pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe:Its to relate...relating. The lady is going out and she related it to him..dude got pissed off. |
Re: . by Nobody: 3:21pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
Whilst your intentions are good, you don't have that privilege yet, you are just a boyfriend. Going forward I advise you not to be so insecure. Meanwhile I think you should not go back and reconcile in your own interest, what is gone is gone. If providence brings you back together, then fine. |
Re: . by TonyeBarcanista(m): 3:29pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe:There are things I think you should know. Drop your WhatsApp contact for a chat... |
Re: . by pryme(m): 5:04pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe: I believe you love this girl very much, am not going to promise you that she will change, but I can assure you one thing, you wont be happy with yourself when you start thinking later on you should have given it your all. People make mistakes - its inevitable, maybe she took your warnings as a bluff. If you are going to break up, it should be something you wont have second thoughts about, but for this one its obvious you are having second thoughts - thats why you are here. My advise? take the stress off your heart/mind and make up with her, I first asked if she was communicating, but since you said she is keeping in touch, then its a good sign. She is trying to put up fight to make it work (ofcos she wont throw herself on the ground for you like she is going to die because of you even when they are dying inside - wont give you that), I dont forgive easily but sometimes I do it to have a clear conscience that i did not make a mistake (its called second chance). If she is not ready to make this relationship work, it will fall apart again in no time, by that time you wont need our opinion, you would have seen it clearly and take a decision. REMEMBER People are raised from different backgrounds, what may be irritating to you maybe the norm for some people. If you meet another lady the chances are is that she may have been fvcking another guy(s) for years before she comes your way, so its all about who understands you and make you happy that counts, not her body count. Its ok to have these kinds of fights in a relationship, but you must make sure to the issue is given a good trashing so that it doesnt repeat itself (talk about it). No one is perfect. We all make mistakes. You are not without flaws, so is she. She may be hurting because of what you have done, so when you guys make up, you owe her an apology (and I believe she will do same - if not thats a red flag). Best of luck. 4 Likes |
Re: . by iRepNaija1: 5:36pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
OP, the fact that you were willing to end a relationship of over a year over this, in my opinion, minor issue, demonstrates to me that you may not be ready for the bigger problems that relationships and marriages bring. All these other people who are telling you that you need to be in control or you handed your balls or to her or that you need to manipulate her by making her jealous are leading down a dangerous path. Relationships, everyone of them, are about compromise and finding a mutually agreeable solution. If someone feels the need to have another person submit to them in any capacity, there is something very wrong. The fact that you're on NL means you're having second thoughts. If you want to, seek out your ex, tell her you overreacted (because in all honesty, you did) and apologize for that overreaction. Then just talk it out in a mature, calm fashion. Maybe she needs to know why (do you have legit reason why?) you want her to inform you of where she goes. If it's a two way street, promise her you'll always do the same. If neither of you can come to an agreement, then part ways amicably. |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 5:41pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
pryme: Thank you. Points noted. |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 5:45pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
iRepNaija1: Thank you. As I said earlier. It was not like this before. We were very transparent with each other. Never found lapses for years until recently. It is also reoccurring. I know more comes in marriages but I want to reduce the possibility of tying the knot with someone I will not agree with her attitude in the near future. I am still very transparent with her but she is not. That is where our problem lie. |
Re: . by Liposure: 6:48pm On Nov 29, 2019 |
If u guys were married i could relate.but not in this case. Your GF owe u no obligation to tell u everything |
Re: . by iRepNaija1: 5:18am On Nov 30, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe: Then you should approach her about it and get a reason why. I would advise you not to approach her in accusatory manner. Instead of saying, "You did xyz. You're not doing abc. You're wrong because of 123," say to her instead, "Sade, when we're not completely transparent with each other, I feel xyz. Can we talk about why this is happening?" You see how the second statement is neutral and addressing the heart of the matter without necessarily pointing fingers? Hopefully, by talking together, you can come up with a mutually agreeable solution. |
Re: . by Nobody: 6:03am On Nov 30, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe: How was her reaction like when you called it quits? I bet she didn't roll on the floor crying and gnashing her teeth. That attitude by her was well scripted. She knew too well how much you value transparency and honesty in your relationship, i mean it's what kept you both together all these years isn't it? So what better way to kill the bond between you two if not doing you like that? They are very smart creatures these chicks, once they have decided to GTFO of a relationship they are never short of ideas on how to screw you over. |
Re: . by Nobody: 7:42am On Nov 30, 2019 |
Gaspardd:comot for here, mumu |
Re: . by hafeezsemzy: 8:39am On Nov 30, 2019 |
Unfortunately you are too emotionally committed to the relationship when it's not marriage. How does knowing her every movement help you? If you don't trust her simply end the relationship but to say that you have to keep checking on movement each time is ridiculous. TheGoodJoe: |
Re: . by 2sexycom(m): 10:17am On Dec 04, 2019 |
TheGoodJoe:If a woman is giving you problem, it is because you make seems like it is all you have got. You should never be with any Nigerian girl without backup EXCEPT you know she is highly dedicated and focus (which many of them aren't anyway). A friend called me few weeks back and complained. I looked at the situation and laughed. I told him to dude, box up and be the man. I didn't see your OP but from what people are saying, it seems you are taking your relationship with the said girl too emotional. I do not know any man that survived any relationship with a Nigerian girl by being emotional. Yyou have to change that bro. |
Re: . by TheGoodJoe(m): 10:51am On Dec 04, 2019 |
2sexycom: Thank you for the advice noted and taking to heart. 1 Like |
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