Loladearewa01:

Really. It's like you speaking through me. I always run away when I see people to avoid small talks. My room is locked 247 to worsen things am into freelance I.T so I work from home

I was once an introvert and left handed while i was little but my family played a role in changing them ....
I became this talkative person to avoid bashing from my family members they saw it as a sickness that needed to be cured from me now ,i talk so much and i have seen the result of it ....getting yourself hurt by peole who , i would have naturally never had talked to....
But the introvert in me didnt just die ...
Now i switch it on and off both my introvert and extrovert nature ...
I am good at it...switching them on when it necessary but gradually i feel the introvert nature in me is beginning to take its place ...once again
In my hostel in school, my hostel colleagues sees me as introvert while in class they see me as extroverted persons
And i could be so very introvert if i want to be but i noticed the introvert nature is a strong ego that controls the extrovertic mature when you switch it on often....

You can work on yourself ...and learn to switch both on when necessary

That's fucking waste of scare resources to call a Lady for two hours? Will the call bring more money to your bank account? If no, it doesn't worth the resources please.

Loladearewa01:
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes.

When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound.

I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out.

Is there anyone with similar experience?

Guy don't even stress, at the end of the day, you want a woman who loves you for who you are. Not one that loves you for the things your prepared to do for her. Being an introvert doesn't mean you cannot make friends, it just means you need to build a relationship with people first before you come out of your shell. Try not giving a Bleep once in a while, say the outlandish things, think out loud, play the devil's advocate in discussions, let people think your weird. Weird is the norm since normal doesn't exist!!
As for calls and communicating, its a two-way street. Your mother didn't give birth to you to be a court jester or an entertainer for women. If you find a girl that puts in just as much effort as you do then it reliefs the pressure on you. Just be yourself and the right one will gravitate towards you eventually.

soleexx:



Turn down is normal...

Ask 10 gals out and 6 we give u a chance...


Tho the remaining 4 are just playing hard to get... They secretly want more pressure for you...

And make sure you don't ask any gal above your level out unless u worthy of it...

Thanks bro... but how do I talk to someone who is an introvert like myself??

You don't have a problem, cos introverts never agrees they are what they are. Ask the clinical experts.
But on the flip side bro, if you are reallyyyyy occupied, you will have even too much to talk about. Your issue is idleness. You spend too much time facing a laptop screen or phone screen. On social media I guess to communicate at length just as this your post. That's becos u embrace fairy more than reality.

excessmon:
Let me type the meaning of your statement
It means hustle so you won’t have fun in life
First order poor man advice

Talking on phone for 2 hours is your idea of fun?

op whenever you are at the drivers front seat on your right and u see a girls well roun and curvy potruded Nyansh, dont pretend and look away ,continue to look at it and imagine it, to the extent that the rest of passengers sitting at your back will notice clearly that u are looking at it. and the confident that which you 're are looking for will certainly start to grow at 9okm/hour. And for all the same fear GOD. Thenq 'U'

Op u b mugu wat do u mean poor communication skills

Oga go hustle oo woman can follow deaf n dumb if he is mega rich

Davidzy23:

Thanks bro... but how do I talk to someone who is an introvert like myself??

Introvert to Introvert is more more interesting but the only con's is that from talking to her, building a friendship and probably dating... You are d one to do the most job... Your relationship will stand on your effort that's because d gal is an Introvert she won't communicate as u expected because she will be so shy to tell you anything or ask questions... So u hav to always make d conversation and don't ignore her if she's not talking... She's just shy

So talking to someone like u... Just find or borrow ThT courage! walkup to her and tell her I will like to knw u better...

Den end ur conversation wit "can I hav ur contact "

From dere start communicatin

I am still supprised that at the level of Christian ity somebody is talking about relationship with girls why not u repent and follow Christ.

soleexx:


Introvert to Introvert is more more interesting but the only con's is that from talking to her, building a friendship and probably dating... You are d one to do the most job... Your relationship will stand on your effort that's because d gal is an Introvert she won't communicate as u expected because she will be so shy to tell you anything or ask questions... So u hav to always make d conversation and don't ignore her if she's not talking... She's just shy

So talking to someone like u... Just find or borrow ThT courage! walkup to her and tell her I will like to knw u better...

Den end ur conversation wit "can I hav ur contact "

From dere start communicatin

hmmmm... looks very easy.. Damn just like this and have wasted a lot of opportunity.. Thanks so much bro..

I'm also like you bro. I easily get tired of small talks especially with the ladies. But I respect them though. it's just something I'm still unable to change.

As the captain of AFC, i will simply say " my guy go and hustle and stop thinking of women, if u make money, u wont need to speak your money will speak for you. You are welcome"

Onyi22:
O boy all u need is money and nothing more
That's d only language girls understand better, not big big grammar,,,,
Who communication epp?

Wrong

Christmasdon:
op whenever you are at the drivers front seat on your right and u see a girls well roun and curvy potruded Nyansh, dont pretend and look away ,continue to look at it and imagine it, to the extent that the rest of passengers sitting at your back will notice clearly that u are looking at it. and the confident that which you 're are looking for will certainly start to grow at 9okm/hour. And for all the same fear GOD. Thenq 'U'

Sense!
OP It's basically confidence to say whatever tha hell you want to say first and take reaction and work from there.
Introverted/shy girls are a sweet niche if you know how to get them talking (read gossiping). You need to know what they like and see if there's any overlap with soma ur interest. If none, just learn to listen and make them feel like they can talk to you.
Extroverted girls are kinda a mixed bag, you never really know what to expect. But at least, some/most of them like to talk already, just learn to listen and tease(this is a guy's superpower).
Summary, learn to listen, tease and say whatever jare life short. you'll be alright, don't reason it too much.. Ain't so deep

Money talks go out there and get you some money and fvvck the bullshiiit

I never speak to these ladies I let my money talk

....

Loladearewa01:
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes.

When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound.

I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out.

Is there anyone with similar experience?

You can't talk for 5mins cus you don't even know what to talk to her about..

You can't give out what you don't even have.

If you didn't have the chance to mingle with your peers, when you were growing up, you'll prolly not understand why or how conversations do take place.

You'll always remain clueless, as to what to say, without even been a shy person. May God help you brother.

....

lilwetdick:
soon the AFC(average frustrated chumps of nairaland) will soon show up here with their stupidity telling you to go and hustle and stop thinking about women.

no woman is going to understand who you are because they gat no time and have their own problem

and you arent going to meet any girl that has the same interest like you do, most women will just pretend that they love what you love to make you happy

just because you are a stunt introvert does not stop you from having fun in life, you just have to come out from your shell and meet with people to improve your communication skills, understand small talk, build up your confidence by not giving a fucck, read a little bits of things and it not compulsory that you must talk with a woman on phone for 2 hours and stop comparing yourself with your ex present bf.

I love this reply! I used to be a staunch introvert too. It also affected my work life and business, as I could not convince prospects to patronize my business. Just like you, I hit quora with the question and got a lot of useful replies.
Just like athletics, you need to practice socializing. And also read books, that really helped me. I'd recommend you read "THE SUBTLE ART OF NOT GIVING A FVCK by MARK MANSON". That book changed my life. Cheers bro!

gregyboy:


I was once an introvert and left handed while i was little but my family played a role in changing them ....
I became this talkative person to avoid bashing from my family members they saw it as a sickness that needed to be cured from me now ,i talk so much and i have seen the result of it ....getting yourself hurt by peole who , i would have naturally never had talked to....
But the introvert in me didnt just die ...
Now i switch it on and off both my introvert and extrovert nature ...
I am good at it...switching them on when it necessary but gradually i feel the introvert nature in me is beginning to take its place ...once again
In my hostel in school, my hostel colleagues sees me as introvert while in class they see me as extroverted persons
And i could be so very introvert if i want to be but i noticed the introvert nature is a strong ego that controls the extrovertic mature when you switch it on often....

You can work on yourself ...and learn to switch both on when necessary

niggy, u
You're neither introvert nor extrovert, stop stressing, you dear mind.

Jus say u are a cool person. U won't die

fynix1:


I love this reply! I used to be a staunch introvert too. It also affected my work life and business, as I could not convince prospects to patronize my business. Just like you, I hit quora with the question and got a lot of useful reply.
Just like athletics, you need to practice socializing. And also read books, that really helped me. I'd recommend you read "THE SUBTLE ART OF NOT GIVING A FVCK by MARK MANSON". That book changed my life. Cheers bro!

Nice recommendation. Add to that
1.No more Mr Nice Guy
2.Models ( I think by Mark Manson)

Davidzy23:

hmmmm... looks very easy.. Damn just like this and have wasted a lot of opportunity.. Thanks so much bro..

Wish you d best

if you are a Christian and you have a church you do attend, please join a department in that church. You may not see the effect at the beginning but trust me, the longer you stay and get acquainted with each and every other members in that department, the more your confidence increases.

the more confident you are about yourself, you can hold conversations with anyone for hours. trust me, I've been in the same shoes and I know how it feels most especially when you are with the opposite sex.

and again, please persue the call of destiny, and every other thing will persue you

I am loving this thread more and more. Keep up the good work guys

Loladearewa01:
I am a staunch introvert, the kind that stays at home all day I really hate small talks and I can't talk to people for more than 5minutes.

When I call a lady hardly can we talk for a minute. Infact I hate calling. Now I had this experience when I visited my aunty and an ex of mine happen to stay in the same compound.

I noticed her boo calls her for like 2hours and she's always laughing with him. This was when I started realising my mistake when I was with her I hardly call and communicate and this has been happening with most of the ladies I meet and things are not working out.

Is there anyone with similar experience?

yes, also in your shoes, my is even worst cos I may not even want to talk to anyone because I don't wanna talk. Get yourself a woman who really understands you, she will help you get over it and associate better. My ex really helped me a lot, she brings up the topic and we spend lots of time talking at the end of the day. When you meet a new lady , just tell her your problem, she would be glad to really help you.

Have you seen where rel men talk on phone?
No matter who they talk to they always take their time
So learn from people u want to look like?
Do you know y wealthy men use kplasa

SenecaTheYonger:


Talking on phone for 2 hours is your idea of fun?

excessmon:
Have you seen where rel men talk on phone?
No matter who they talk to they always take their time
So learn from people u want to look like?
Do you know y wealthy men use kplasa

You don't know what fun means. Please, talking on the phone for 2 hours is not fun. Lol @ 'rel' men

I have just one question. Do you masturbate and watch porn? Quit these and watch your social life improve.

Loladearewa01:

That's very true. Honestly I hate interacting with people but am getting really lonely

Don't worry about all this, make money now, in 10 years time you will still be knocking all this girl's age grade
But you go be sugar Daddy

chibyke02:


Immediately I see dis post I started checking comments to see were my dating Coach will comment and after few scroll I saw it.
Bro I advise you read dis his prescription and also the ChatDícted 1&2. It will help.

We are already available to put men on the right path.