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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? (51327 Views)
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Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Quality20(m): 10:02am On Dec 11, 2019 |
Rajman45: |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by longjohnsilver: 10:04am On Dec 11, 2019 |
Just move on with your life, you are not getting that man back. Most men I know(myself inclusive) forgive but don't forget. The thoughts of another man on your woman, sweating and pounding away is enough to make any man miserable. Things will never be the same anymore. Move on totally and become a better woman for the next guy. 87 Likes 4 Shares |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by thelish(f): 10:07am On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92: My dear, the most important thing is for u to forgive urself n regain ur self confidence. So many people u admire today, once did some awful deeds, but they Neva allow their lives n actions to reflect it. Its obvious, u r sorry for ur deed. God himself has. forgiven u. U don't allow the words of people to weigh u down, cos they have Neva been perfect all their lives. We all have done some unspeakable things that we are not proud of. Its all part of d process. Its what make life, life. It was Neva meant to be smooth all thru. So carry urself with dignity n a better man will come ur way. The strength of love is known when there are faults,mistakes n offences. Self guilt n condemnation is of d devil. Romans8:1 See urself better. 31 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by EngrMarve(m): 10:10am On Dec 11, 2019 |
DownChelsea: No problem o But will you forgive me if you catch me cheating? 2 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by thelish(f): 10:10am On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92: U can't heal him when u haven't healed urself. U r loss urself, how do u find somebody else? Don't allow a mistake define u. Show him d new u. Full of confidence n courage. Its his choice whether to come back or not. 12 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Nobody: 10:12am On Dec 11, 2019 |
Four times? inside car nitori olorun You mean your legs were hanged on the car seat and baba dey pummel dey go? Hain! even if you want to cheat, cheat with dignity nah . . Bia does that mean every time you have issues in your relationship/ marriage you will be confiding in pricks around? Babe abeg forget and move on. I as a lady can not continue with a partner that cheated even if it's just once not to talk of guys. Just move on biko and try to do better in your next relationship. 51 Likes 3 Shares |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by DownChelsea(f): 10:13am On Dec 11, 2019 |
EngrMarve:I won’t. But I know you won’t cheat so I have no worrys. But me, I will cheat ooo so be ready to forgive over and over again 3 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by EngrMarve(m): 10:14am On Dec 11, 2019 |
DownChelsea: LOL... You won't kee me. 3 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by GiantParrot(m): 10:23am On Dec 11, 2019 |
It will be extremely difficult to find a self-respecting decent man who will forgive cheating. If you view the man you cheated on as one of such men, then you may better move on with your life. Be faithful to the next man you date or marry. At least you say you're better now. Let someone new get to know this better version of you. The current man has already seen that you are capable of cheating. This is knowledge that has crystalized in his memory bank. This is the nature of trust based relationships. Trust must be handled like glass, with utmost care. You don't play around with trust. There is no having one's cake and eating it too in matters of trust. There's no returning to it's original state when it is broken. No matter how well you try to fix broken glass, the cracks will remain visible. 30 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by owiko(m): 10:54am On Dec 11, 2019 |
For your man to admit he has forgiven you, I take him for a mature minded person who understands that most women in their broken state, are not usually good handlers of emotions. But then, the circumstances that led to the issues you had with him and the efforts you made towards resolving them, would be a yardstick for him to judge the sincerity of your feelings of guilt. 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by sunnedee2: 11:06am On Dec 11, 2019 |
This is strong. Very strong. Let put myself in his shoes. Will I forgive you? Most probably. Will I take you back? Only as a fuc.k buddy (Marriage is totally out of it because each time we are being intimate, I will still remember and imagine another man knacking you and you moaning as you were moaning now). Trust me, I'm talking from experience (the graphics will always remain in his head) Bottom line. Except he really, really, really loves you, and except he is a good Christian/Muslim, just believe that the relationship is over. Learn from this, move on and hopefully you will find a good man. Ciao. By the way, what led to you guys having a rough patch? Finances? Attitude? 28 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by AfroKnight: 12:14pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92, first of all, with all due respect, his healing is not your business. Let him handle it himself. You said “it happened”. Like, you know, it rained today, the sun came out this morning, the sea roared against the distant shores; you had sex with a married man; you know, it happened. Just like that. Like it was going to happen anyway. Lol. And “it” happened 3 more times. Making 4 instances where you threw his love and trust in the gutter and collected premium thrusting from mr colleague. There is a good chance it would happen again. Why do you want the innocent man to take such a chance? Do you realise that that could damage him? Later, the guy may forgive you and mistakenly accept you back, but then one devil would whisper to you to turn around, withdraw from him and flee because who knows, he might retaliate in like fashion. Then you’d end up messing with his mind again, when you could have just left him alone. When he is ready to take the risk, he will come for you. If he doesn’t, then he has made his peace. You should do likewise. 28 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by seyigiggle: 12:41pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
straight to the point; forget it! continue to ride the married man until another relationship comes around. 11 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by aytuns(m): 1:30pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
niaralandtopuser: And this answers it. The trust is GONE. Even if you two get back together, every call you make/receive, ever hi/hello you give or receive, every action of yours towards the opposite sex will be termed as infidelity. 13 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by hkidola00(m): 1:44pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92:dont annoy me pls ,which repent?.. I forgave my gf who was intimate wit her cousin 2wice,a year later now, she's back cheating on me wit another guy, just b'cos I aren't picked her call for two months... she started dating another fast fast... if ur husband abandon u for two months, I'm sure u will hop on another dicckkksss again.. idiots 36 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Nobody: 1:46pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
I'm actually just reading the part about the colleague being married. How do you have sex with a married man four times, knowing he has a wife at home? To say four times is deliberate is an understatement, and it's likely OP wouldn't have stopped or confessed had the boyfriend not gotten suspicious. Knowing all these, if I were the ex-boyfriend, there would be no reconciling, ever. She not only broke their r|ship w| her actions but helped the married man break his vows (I know it takes two to tango, however), so there's no way I would trust her to respect mine in the future. No, she shouldn't continue sleeping with the married colleague. That's nonsense. seyigiggle: 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Dreiwizzy: 3:31pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
theButterfly:Preach! I bu the priest nne. 6 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by 24kmagic: 3:35pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
For me, yes, it's impossible. No chance. 2 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Prakash247(m): 3:39pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92:Am sorry sister but I doubt if he can truly forgive you. Once a cheat, always a cheat. No one even liked your post. That's to say u r alone in this. Am sorry OP, I have no soothing words for you. Okafor's law of congodynamics states that a Congo once shined can always be reshined. I wish u all the best. You will heal, its just a matter of time. 15 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Nobody: 4:34pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Thank you all for your words. I have picked some lessons from them. But some of your opinions don't define me or my actions in the future. I have heard and I don't have a choice but to keep it moving. I already know all my actions are wrong, I only brought it here not to garner pity but to seek ways to alleviate the damage done and you have all told me the bitter truth. Thanks to everyone that contributed. 18 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Nobody: 4:39pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92:You had sex with a married man inside the car, not once, not twice but three goddam times. (all inside the car) All in the name of seeking for advice, who does that, you're no different from road side ashawo work on your dignity first. please leave that young man alone. you're just fantastically stupid. 17 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Great6Pack(m): 4:42pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
The worst set of hypocrites in this world are men. You can go Bleep as you like either as married man or while dating but it is a taboo for her to do it. Let it be known here that I am not in anyway in support of cheating while married or courting. But let the truth be told, if you access 10 men, married or courting, at least 6 of them had at one time had sex with someone not their mate. One thing is sure, if this babe is the one that the man confessed to, she will happily forgive him and move ahead with the relationship. Why can't men sometimes do same. Especially when you know your mate isn't promiscuous but was overtaken by moment of weakness? Sis, please gather yourself together and concentrate on your work and life. I give you 3 months, a RESPONSIBLE guy will be dying to be your man. And if your present guy (soon to be ex) comes back, tell him he was in the past but you have moved on. Please abuse me ONLY if you know you are innocent and never cheat. God is watching!!! 23 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Godsonjolly: 6:17pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92: Even if no one forgives you, God has forgiven you and I too forgive you lol. No girl would confess, but you did. Tho you wrong but there's no need judging you with that. What is done is done and what is gone is gone. It's really hard to let go cos we humans. It will only take great love and strength to forget such. Just be yourself, forgive yourself, enjoy yourself, don't get bothered over the issue dear. Afterall men do marry a repentant prostitute. And you not a prostitute. Since you have changed and admit your faults, try talk to your ex, make him see reasons that u changed and won't ever commit such, u can also pray for God to touch him or do whatever you believe in. But if he doesn't, leave him. A better person will come by and won't even look at your past. Be good dear, be safe and stop hurting yourself. Love doesn't get exhausted at all. It's enough for anyone who really wants it. Be good. 12 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by OlaitanAkanbi(m): 6:34pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92: If you truly love the guy find him go after him and beg him let him trust you again don’t hide anything from him let him have access to your phone and contact so he won’t be scared of you cheating on him again go down on your knees beg him ( to find true love this days are very hard ) 6 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Erums(m): 6:48pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
JERRY1925: Just learnt from. You.. Your advice so on point... Thanks 1 Like |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Small080(m): 6:58pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Some guys are heartless, you cheated on her, she find out, you beg her and she forgive you..... Why can't you forgive her 1 Like |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Erums(m): 7:03pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92: How. Old re u pls?.. Be honest |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Erums(m): 7:11pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
This year has taught me alot on relationship. I dated a lady since 8th Dec 2018, she cheated on me with numerous guys at different times, I was broken, really shattered... I forgave her.. But trusting wasn't easy. Now instead of her to help amend back the trust. She now starts keeping tabs with male bestie Having relations with her married ex Even comparing me to new man she met and saying that he such a gentle man and knows how to care for a lady. That is he wasn't AS by genotype she would have left me fr him.. Now that was when my eyes really cleared.. I have lost confidence because I was literally doing everything to convince her otherwise not to take dat step. Well I braced up... Took control of the relationship, bleeped her like mad.... Break up, make up, break up, make up again like 5 times... Now I'm done... Im. Leaving... Lesson of this is ; don't hurt people dat truly love u, love is dangerous, if they get so hurt it can be miserable for u... I just made her know dere is no future and she started making plans of how to get pregnant for me.... I let her know I'm. Done... Even if she get pregnant by any means me... I can't trust her I broke up with her 9th Dec 2019....i year of good lessons to ever live with... Let him go... Cos u done alot of damage.... Well u repentant... Fixing the trust back is gonna be difficult... 22 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by jesmond3945: 7:49pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Butterscotch92:you mean sex in the car or just kissing? |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Katsuke: 8:12pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Erums:Well in your bid to sound like a strong man, you actually came out as a weak one, sorry to say. Beta Male for that fact, I'm not bashing, just stating the obvious 25 Likes |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by dober(m): 8:20pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
I have read a lot of comments here and I only feel soory for you. THE NEGATIVES: First of all. You guys had consented sex, stop blaming it on the married man and on your emotions. I think you really didn't genuinely love your bf. If you did, you would have stopped after the first time and amended your relationship with him by all means possible. I am sure you later discovered that the person you were cheating with isn't ready to have a life with you apart from the sex. And you had to run back to your supposed bf. If the married man wasn't married and was willing to marry you, I am also sure you wouldn't had even remembered to apologise to anyone or feel any guilt. HOWEVER These may be your way forward...... Give ursef time. Pray to your God to help you heal. Get busy with work, Disconnected yourself from that married man (mind you, he didn't take advantage of your vulnerability as we always hear from you ladies. You may have taken advantage of his too. ). Be grateful he has forgiven you. Don't push him to accepting you back. If he comes back later, be very open with him like you would be to yourself. Please don't let anyone make you feel like you have committed the worst crime on earth. A lot of us had been in this kinda mess before. And I must commend your efforts for confessing to him. I feel you are a good woman..Please don't do that again for the sake of love.. Stay Blessed Butterscotch92 23 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Is It So Impossible To Forgive A Girlfriend That Cheated? by Nobody: 8:27pm On Dec 11, 2019 |
Lol. You've learnt your lesson. Take it to your God, if he wills it, you guys may come back together but if not, you simply have to move on. 2 Likes |
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